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Medicine

He Called it a 'Scamdemic' - Then Saw His Family Getting Sick (sfgate.com) 561

A remarkable first-person story in today's Washington Post: I used to call it the "scamdemic." I thought it was an overblown media hoax. I made fun of people for wearing masks. I went all the way down the rabbit hole and fell hard on my own sword, so if you want to hate me or blame me, that's fine. I'm doing plenty of that myself.

The party was my idea. That's what I can't get over. Well, I mean, it wasn't even a party — more like a get-together. There were just six of us, OK? My parents, my partner, and my partner's parents... Some people in my family didn't necessarily share all of my views, but I pushed it. I've always been out front with my opinions. I'm gay and I'm conservative, so either way I'm used to going against the grain... I told my family: "Come on. Enough already. Let's get together and enjoy life for once." They all came for the weekend. We agreed not to do any of the distancing or worry much about it... We cooked nice meals. We watched a few movies. I played a few songs on my baby grand piano. We drove to a lake about 60 miles outside of Dallas and talked and talked. It was nothing all that special. It was great. It was normal...

I have no idea which one of us brought the virus into the house, but all six of us left with it. It kept spreading from there.... I was sweating profusely. I would wake up in a pool of sweat. I had this tingling feeling all over my body, this radiating kind of pain... Then one day I was walking up the stairs, and all of the sudden, I couldn't breathe. I screamed and fell flat on my face. I blacked out. I woke up a while later in the ER, and 10 doctors were standing around me in a circle. I was lying on the table after going through a CT scan. The doctors told me the virus had attacked my nervous system. They'd given me some medications that stopped me from having a massive stroke. They said I was minutes away.

I stayed in the hospital for three days, trying to get my mind around it. It was guilt, embarrassment, shame. I thought: "OK. Maybe now I've paid for my mistake." But it kept getting worse. Six infections turned into nine. Nine went up to 14. It spread from one family member to the next, and it was like each person caught a different strain... My father is 78, and he went to get checked out at the hospital, but for whatever reasons, he seemed to recover really fast. My father-in-law nearly died in his living room and then ended up in the same hospital as me on the exact same day. His mother was in the room right next to him because she was having trouble breathing. They were lying there on both sides of the wall, fighting the same virus, and neither of them ever knew the other one was there. She died after a few weeks. On the day of her funeral, five more family members tested positive...

They put my father-in-law on a ventilator, and he lay there on life support for six or seven weeks. There was never any goodbye. He was just gone. It's like the world swallowed him up.

We could only have 10 people at the funeral, and I didn't make that list.

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He Called it a 'Scamdemic' - Then Saw His Family Getting Sick

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  • by mr_resident ( 222932 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @11:40AM (#60594836) Homepage

    ...doesn't excuse you from being a stupid twat. He willfully and gleefully infected himself and others. He should be in prison.

    • by Anonymous Coward on Sunday October 11, 2020 @11:52AM (#60594874)

      Why did he infect his family?
      Perhaps it was because the 'Tweeter in Chief' kept saying that it was fake, less infectious than the flu etc etc.
      Blame the likes of Trump for at least half the deaths in the USA from CV-19.

      The sooner he spends the rest of his natural in an Orange Jumpsuit (made out of sack cloth) the better.

  • by v1 ( 525388 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @11:50AM (#60594868) Homepage Journal

    Yes, a big part of the blame rests on your shoulders, but a very significant part also rests on the deniers in the government and media that you listened to. The role models and leaders that were supposed to say "Hey, you, don't do that!" But instead they told you "Don't worry about it, it's just a minor thing that's been blown all out of proportion, it's a hoax, ignore those 'experts', they don't know what they're talking about, just go about business as usual."

    And you listened to them. People that you SHOULD have been able to trust. People that should have been speaking with your best interest in mind. Were they idiots? Did they have some other agenda? Doesn't matter now.

    It's a shame there's not much more you do about it now besides to do your part and try to limit the damage they can do, try to slow the body count - make sure they don't get re-elected.

    Make sure you VOTE!

    • You can't really vote against Fox News*. Most of their loyal viewers have that bad cancer deeply embedded in their brain, and won't turn away from it, no matter what.

      Fox News is the other side of the free speech sword. It is entirely permissible for them to make fistfuls of dollars misleading millions of people, including the president. If you want to stop that, your options are either clamping down on free speech, or educating the next generation so they don't fall for the same shit their parents and grandparents did.

      The Republicans' war on education is doubly scary when you realize this.

      (*And Brietbart and InfoWars and many others, but Fox is the one with millions of viewers.)

  • Gump (Score:4, Insightful)

    by awwshit ( 6214476 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @11:51AM (#60594872)

    Stupid is as stupid does. This guy is one conspiracy away from another fiasco.

    • As he said in the article "I'm gay and conservative". He is not someone who makes good decisions.
  • by frank_adrian314159 ( 469671 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @12:10PM (#60594932) Homepage

    ... are soon parted in these days of pandemic. Here's a clue: if you listen to stupid people, you become more stupid.

    In the final analysis, he deserved what he got. Sadly, his parents didn't deserve this retarded monkey for a son. You don't fucking browbeat your parents into doing dangerous things. But, I guess, he was from Texas, so that's an additive factor of stupid tossed in. Could have been worse though - he could have been from Florida.

  • But school (Score:4, Interesting)

    by sjames ( 1099 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @12:44PM (#60595088) Homepage Journal

    I wonder how many children will end up wondering if they killed grandma after they bring COVID home from school?

  • by rapierian ( 608068 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @12:44PM (#60595090)
    Anecdotally, I know some people who had a cough for all of a day and then were fine. And I know some people who had really high fever and where wiped out for about 3 days, and then took two weeks to recover. Anecdotes are stupid, they can spin the story either way.
    • For everyone of us in this times, everything that happens to us, or our friends, neighbours, family: is an anecdote.
      No ideas why americans try to use that word as a kind of swear word.

  • by fahrbot-bot ( 874524 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @02:12PM (#60595568)

    ... I went all the way down the rabbit hole and fell hard on my own sword, ...

    Why the hell did you bring a sword down a rabbit hole?

  • by hdyoung ( 5182939 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @03:02PM (#60595780)
    First, I haven't done my homework to verify the story is real. I'm willing to take it face value for now:

    A long time ago, the US decided that it's a persons god-given right to be a booger-eating moron. We don't have a nanny state and we give people enormous individual freedoms. That means that some will make smart choices and others are gonna be dumber than a block of granite. And it's not the government's place to prevent the dumb people from being dumb.

    However, being dumb frequently has consequences. A tough lesson, and this guy learned it in the hardest way imaginable. Same goes for the people who attended the party.

    I'm really, really sorry that someone died and others suffered, but they have absolutely nobody to blame but themselves. Info about this virus has been in everyones face for months. I've been invited to things by friends where I simply said "nope. too many people in an enclosed space. This virus is airborne and its 10 times deadlier than flu. Gonna pass". His family members and partner could have refused the invitation. The cost of the bad judgement was one death, several people with likely permanent medical problems, and millions of dollars of medical bills.

    The US way of life is very harsh on people who make bad decisions. This is not a bug - it's a feature that was deliberately designed into the system.
  • Unbelievable story (Score:3, Insightful)

    by Albietta ( 3548603 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @03:28PM (#60595878)
    This story is completely unbelievable. Not to say that it could not happen (and probably has, at least in some way), but think about the circumstances regarding the publication: - Corona is the main democratic talking-point against Trump. - WaPo is a rabit anti-Trump paper. - Publication just before the election and after Trumps COVID-diagnosis. - Very well written drama, just like something a journalist would come up with. - The main character is a gay republican that came to his senses after living in complete denial. - Why on earth would a conservative tell their story to liberal WaPo of all papers?! Sorry, but I just can't believe this is a real story but made up by WaPo in order to support the Biden-campaign. Everything is just too convenient from a liberal perspective and the story seem to be written in order to underscore the democratic narrative and highlight "stupid conservatives".
  • by GuB-42 ( 2483988 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @04:28PM (#60596122)

    Yes, the "scamdemic" part was pretty stupid, but from the story, it doesn't look that his actions were that bad. He didn't organized a 1000 person kissing contest or anything like that, and he wasn't coughing all over the place. He just planned a single family gathering with 6 people. Maybe not ideal but that's the kind of thing almost everyone does, even those who are generally careful. And unless your place is in hard lockdown, it is generally tolerated by the authorities.

    But in that story, everyone got sick, and in a really nasty way. The virus doesn't transmit that easily, most contact cases I heard about turned out negative, and official statistics tend to confirm that. His family, himself included, also was hit much harder than the average. Normally, only about 10-20% get more than "just a flu" (at least on the short term). He and his family were really unlucky. He totally didn't deserved what happened to him despite his opinions.

    Anyways, it is also an interesting case study. Is that how "superspreader" events look like? The severity of symptoms seem to indicate a large viral load. Did someone spread the virus like mad? How? Were there symptoms, no matter how mild, before the gathering? Are there family-specific predispositions? Did several people got infected beforehand? Are this situations taken into account when designing models?

  • anecdotal bullshit (Score:3, Insightful)

    by switchfeet ( 982197 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @04:56PM (#60596194)
    the virus is dangerous. we don't need bullshit anecdotal stories scaring more people. for the majority, it's a statistical fact that you will survive just the same as the flu, and the bs stories about 'long term side effects' are rare. this guy is an idiot for saying it's a scam. but we don't need more scare stories. the people that think it's a scam will never change their mind.
  • by misnohmer ( 1636461 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @06:59PM (#60596566)

    I don't know with certainty whether or not this story is true, but it sure sounds like a fable. No details, who, where, when, etc. so impossible to corroborate. Loose ends conveniently cut off with stamens such as "I don't know which one of us brought it", meaning no contact tracing was done, not even who else who met any of those 6 prior to the "party" also got sick. Given this, it is technically possible all 6 got it from differenent sources.

  • A personal story (Score:5, Informative)

    by Calibax ( 151875 ) on Sunday October 11, 2020 @08:49PM (#60596830)

    I lost my son to COVID-19.

    He lived in a state that opened early, including sports. He was a coach for his daughter's hockey team and they had a meeting about restarting the team. He wore a mask, but most people did not. In particular, the guy sitting next to him did not, and he was in the presymptomatic phase - two days later the guy was diagnosed with the disease. And three days later my son was diagnosed with it also.

    After about a week he had trouble breathing and went to the hospital, and he was placed on a ventilator. After a little over two weeks he was able to breathe for himself and appeared to be getting better - the tests for COVID-19 came back negative.

    Four days after coming off the ventilator his blood pressure dropped precipitously and he was placed on a blood pressure support medication. The next day they had added three more blood pressure support medications, that was everything they had, and had put him back on a ventilator. Later that day, I watched (through FaceTime) as the nurse practitioner removed his intubation. I heard his last words. I watched as he took his last breath while a nurse held his hand. I watched the nurse close his eyes after he passed. Beyond doubt, it was the worst day of my life.

    • Sorry to hear this. I have a son - my best buddy - and I can't imagine the pain and sense of loss you must've experienced. It must be absolutely crushing.

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