America Is Facing a Monkey Shortage 159
Thud457 shares a report from USA Today: The race for a coronavirus vaccine to help end the pandemic has consumed the scientific community and created an escalating demand for an essential resource: monkeys. Before drug companies call on human volunteers, monkeys are used in preclinical trials to test a vaccine's safety and effectiveness. But with more than 100 vaccines in development around the world, there aren't enough monkeys to go around. "There is a shortage," said Dr. Skip Bohm, associate director and chief veterinary medical officer of the Tulane National Primate Research Center.
Like other aspects of society, the pandemic has underscored an already existing problem. Nonhuman primate research centers have been strained in recent years because of restrictions on imported monkeys from countries like China and India, and a lack of funding to support domestic breeding. "We've always been in a state where we were always very close to the level of production to meeting the demand for research, and that has been the status for several years," Bohm said. "When the COVID pandemic came about, that just pressed us even further." According to a 2018 analysis by the National Institutes of Health, the national primate centers' projected demand for monkeys would increase by 20% to 50%. Most centers were not equipped to accommodate that kind of increase -- then the pandemic hit.
Tulane's primate research center has about 5,000 monkeys but only about 500 are used for research in a normal year because of age, health and colony dynamics. This year, Bohm estimates the same number of primates might be needed across the centers just for COVID-19 research alone. To satisfy the demand, NIH and research centers have had to collaborate more closely than ever. NIH created a committee to prioritize COVID-19 research while centers developed master protocols to optimize research, including sharing control groups.
Like other aspects of society, the pandemic has underscored an already existing problem. Nonhuman primate research centers have been strained in recent years because of restrictions on imported monkeys from countries like China and India, and a lack of funding to support domestic breeding. "We've always been in a state where we were always very close to the level of production to meeting the demand for research, and that has been the status for several years," Bohm said. "When the COVID pandemic came about, that just pressed us even further." According to a 2018 analysis by the National Institutes of Health, the national primate centers' projected demand for monkeys would increase by 20% to 50%. Most centers were not equipped to accommodate that kind of increase -- then the pandemic hit.
Tulane's primate research center has about 5,000 monkeys but only about 500 are used for research in a normal year because of age, health and colony dynamics. This year, Bohm estimates the same number of primates might be needed across the centers just for COVID-19 research alone. To satisfy the demand, NIH and research centers have had to collaborate more closely than ever. NIH created a committee to prioritize COVID-19 research while centers developed master protocols to optimize research, including sharing control groups.
Easy fix (Score:5, Insightful)
Anybody who doesn't want to wear a mask is turned into a vaccine test subject. Since they don't believe Covid is real, they are in fact the ideal test subjects, since the placebo effect doesn't exist for them. A total win-win ;-)
Re: Easy fix (Score:5, Insightful)
I like it. People who disagree with you about stuff are subhuman anyway. Nothing bad ever came of such attitudes.
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It's weird to see that you have sarcasm-metter stuck at 0...
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It's weird to see that you have sarcasm-metter stuck at 0...
It's weird that you don't see that humanity deserves nothing less every now and then.
The parent had a point that we humans are sadly too stupid to avoid repeating.
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Here we go, slashdotters! A *perfect* monkey... the Nazi poster.
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We could put them in prison and have them work for 63 cents an hour. The Constitution allows that.
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Re: Easy fix (Score:5, Insightful)
And nothing good has ever come out of assuming that humans aren't animals.
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Lack of mod points here, so here's a virtual +5 informative.
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Re: Easy fix (Score:1)
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It wouldn't be the first time that governments have forcibly sent people off to die for the sake of their fellow men.
(Trump excepted of course, he thinks all those people were losers)
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Anybody who doesn't want to wear a mask is turned into a vaccine test subject. Since they don't believe Covid is real, they are in fact the ideal test subjects, since the placebo effect doesn't exist for them. A total win-win ;-)
Good idea, but the problem is that those same people believe that the government or Bill Gates or Soros wants to use the vaccinations as a trick to implant microchips, mind control drugs, or alien DNA. They would still be good test subjects were they not so well-armed and ready to kill their own families and neighbors to spare them the horrors of being the victim of cannibal pedophiles.
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These people have been manipulated to such a degree that they are incapable of forming rational judgements. Hatred and ridicule are the easy responses, but I feel like we have an obligation to keep fighting no matter how fixed their fears and ignorance are. Regardless of their faults, they still deserve to be treated as human beings. "Letting Darwin sort things out" is not an ethical option.
Posting Anon because I don't trust that this comment won't come back to haunt me eventually...
I'm not an anti-vaxxer by any stretch. I've got all my required vaccines, and if I have children one day, they will get vaccinated per the CDC schedule. This one is different. A vaccine for a virus we didn't even know existed a year ago, with every possible pressure to be first to release, and no long-term testing or studies? I don't think it's unreasonable to want to follow Windows Version Logic and wait unt
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I realize you're joking, but sadly they are likely to become the control subjects. I predict that the mask deniers will also refuse to be vaccinated, either because they believe the virus is a hoax or they will believe the inevitable bizarre stories and conspiracy theories that will arise about the vaccine.
These people have been manipulated to such a degree that they are incapable of forming rational judgements. Hatred and ridicule are the easy responses, but I feel like we have an obligation to keep figh
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Regardless of their faults, they still deserve to be treated as human beings. "Letting Darwin sort things out" is not an ethical option.
At this point they'd have to be forced to accept vaccination. They're not going to be talked into it. Is that ethical if the alternative is Darwination?
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Ethics boards will not allow this if the vaccine under test has not been shown to be safe; generally requiring the animal studies, then they WONT allow human test subjects; no matter how willing those subjects might be.
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There are plenty of monkeys in the U.S. You know where they are, don't pretend that you don't.
Trump rallies?
they didn't count all the monkeys (Score:5, Funny)
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Where's Dubya when you really need him???
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Yes,
It would be also a more humane way of testing to use politicians instead of animals.
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Also to my knowledge there is no Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Politicians.
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I'd feel a little guilty, potentially causing flu symptoms or other side effects to an intelligent thinking creature.
Not that I'd freely it do it to the politicians either - some of them can solve basic puzzles, you know.
shortage? (Score:2)
Came here for the comments (Score:3)
Re:Came here for the comments (Score:5, Insightful)
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I'm pretty sure everyone commenting on this article is kidding except for the "my daily experiences with the modern internet" guy, or at least I hope they are.
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(TrueScore: 4, Reality Check)
Some proportion of them are hitting the streets with guns, or covid-coughing on people while getting all huffy about Muh Freedoms. Maybe at the same time.
Harmless fun isn't always harmless.
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It's unsettling to hear the incredibly common joke of lawyers and politicians being monkeys? Or is it unsettling that maybe these aren't jokes and deep down inside you also think there we would be no worse off putting monkeys in the white house, and politicians in a lab...
Re: Came here for the comments (Score:1)
If the prefix Con- is the opposite of Pro-
These come from Latin, but only one was a self-standing word on its own. Pro is a full word, and is also used as a prefix, meaning "for" or forward". (The same prepostion/adverb exists in Greek, both ancient and modern, as pros.)
But con is the English shortened form of the Latin word contra, meaning against, or opposed to. Pro is the Latin for "for," or "in favour of;" contra is simply the Latin preposition and adverb for "against."
Then Congress is clearly the opposite of Progress, so what harm could really become of your suggestions?
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Re: Came here for the comments (Score:2)
You mean it's revolting...and you're right
They can request old people to volunteer (Score:1)
Lawyers (Score:5, Insightful)
In other news, there is an excess of lawyers. Lawyers are primates, so kill two birds with one stone?
https://www.wsj.com/articles/t... [wsj.com]
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Re:Lawyers (Score:5, Funny)
I think a monkey is a better surrogate for a human than a lawyer.
Re:Lawyers (Score:4, Funny)
I think a monkey is a better surrogate for a human than a lawyer.
Yes, but there are ethical issues with using monkeys.
Re: Lawyers (Score:2)
Re: Lawyers (Score:2)
Uh, guys modding 'insightful', I think he was going for 'funny'. At least I hope he was...
I've been saying this for years. (Score:1)
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If monkeys could vote they would support fixing climate change. And free bananas.
And I'm sure Bernie would have been sure to add bananas to his list of Free Stuff in his stump speech....
Read that "money" (Score:2)
How does it even make sense? (Score:2)
> we were always very close to the level of production to meeting the demand for research, and that has been the status for several years
OK, what were the alternatives? Should there have been some kind of overproduction, like let's continuously "produce" monkeys, what's the problem, we just slaughter the excess?
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But I fail to see how you do this with living creatures. It's not like you mothball a bunch of female macaques
Re: How does it even make sense? (Score:2)
Its called India. No damned shortage
https://youtu.be/qgRaAA9AaF4 [youtu.be]
Even if you cannot bring them here, bring the trial vials there and setup the 2 month trial there. Its not that critical of a stage. They are simply looking for adverse reactions. The effectiveness of the vaccine is not part of the monkey trial.
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Really, it's a typewriter shortage. (Score:3)
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the real reason (Score:2)
Monkey shortage? (Score:2)
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Have they checked the White House?
Go to the big cage and check Congress.. There is a lot more potential there.
sharing control groups (Score:2)
Why not use politicians? (Score:3)
Or are they not a proper surrogate for humans?
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Or are they not a proper surrogate for humans?
You want to risk having them healed? I have ethical concerns about that..
Shortage my ass.. (Score:2)
I thought india was overrun with the damned things? Thats what, a 14hr flight? Problem solved in less time than it took to write the damn article.
https://youtu.be/qgRaAA9AaF4 [youtu.be]
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you do realize there are two ends of a line segment right?
One end... a syringe with a vaccine
the other end, a monkey in India in need of a vaccine
now you can either move the monkey to the syringe ... or you can move the syringe to the monkey.
Holy shit how hard is this concept to grasp for these people? Get your fat ass on a plane and fly to india, Round up 30 monkeys and spend 4 weeks testing for adverse reactions. This is not rocket science. How the hell can people making the vaccine not consider this. Som
Use them (Score:1)
Just go monkey fishing (Score:2)
https://slate.com/news-and-pol... [slate.com]
Now I feel bad for beating my monkey (Score:3)
To save more monkeys... (Score:2)
...do better job on engineering the vaccines you want to test on them to restrain your simian fatality rate.
Dave Barry is way ahead of Slashdot. (Score:2)
Here [herald.com].
Monkeys are our cousins, leave them alone. (Score:2)
So that's why they want more H1-Bs. (Score:2)
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"America's average IQ will increase measurably if there are enough bad outcomes."
You could refer to it as "the Trump Bump".
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Problem solved, plus America's average IQ will increase measurably if there are enough bad outcomes.
No more fundies, no more hippie moms. We win all around.
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Hippe's are liberals in most stereotypical views of the word. Yea, they are the 1960's tie-died shirt wearing anti-establishment set, who are now members of AARP and dying off in droves, but they are decidedly not usually seen as being on the right. They are the liberal skulls full of much who are radical left of their day.
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My point is that they represent the other half of the antivax movement, complementing the cohort who believe that Jesus wouldn't put artificial medicines into his body.
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Having discussed this with a couple of anti-vaxers that I happened to debate this with, I can tell you that you obviously don't understand their point, and they DO have a point (albeit a bit misguided) and some science to back themselves up.
I don't agree with them, and I think they are nuts, but SOME of them have actually done some pretty good investigative work and have at least thought about exactly why they are anti-vaccine. I'm sure you can find somebody with religious objections to vaccines (say the A
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Are they the ones who believe that "vaccines are made of aborted fetuses" or the ones who believe that vaccines contain mercury?
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Actually, I've met a few who object to actual contents of vaccines which are real. The have one plausible point about adjuvants, namely aluminum, which is in the MMR vaccine to boost its effectiveness. Where I don't agree with their conclusions, they do have a possibly debatable point on that one. I ran into one lady who was all bent out of shape about the mercury issue but she shut up pretty quick when I explained (and proved) that vaccines of today don't have this ingredient anymore and haven't for decad
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Before I got my recent ocular implants, I wore contact lenses for fifty straight years. The preservative in the lens cleaner I used that whole time was thimerosal, the same compound-wth-a-trace-of-mercury that antivaxers claim makes vaccines dangerous. No ill effects whatever. The abortion story originated with the cloning of a single fetal cell - just one - as the origin of a cell line used in the production of several vaccines for childhood diseases. This has nothing to do with today's Covid vaccines, but
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One correction.. The adjuvant Aluminum is in the TDAP vaccine, not the MMR vaccine. The MMR vaccine doesn't have any adjuvants. Both vaccines are on the CDC suggested vaccination schedule I was mistaken which was which... Sorry for the mistake.
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But because they think the whole thing is a hoax, they will probably think you're going to give them autism.
Re:I think we can solve this (Score:5, Insightful)
Just offer twenty bucks per test regime on conservative websites. Since they believe the whole COVID-19 thing is a hoax, they should sign up in droves.
Problem solved, plus America's average IQ will increase measurably if there are enough bad outcomes.
So many untrue stereotypes, so little time..
Nobody I know who's a conservative believes anything of the sort.. What we believe is that the liberals/democrats are blowing the whole COVID-19 thing out of proportion for political reasons. Yea, it's dangerous to some folks, and we should protect them as best as we can from getting the virus, but for the VAST majority of us, the virus isn't a serious problem given what's passed as "no problem" in the past. (Say like SARS and H1N1.) Wear your mask when you cannot social distance should be suggested, but we would favor personal freedom to choose over mandates.
The hoax here is how the liberals/democrats are treating this whole thing.. A prime example of this is how Nancy P. got her hair done - "A blowout" at an illegally open salon, closed by local COVID-19 rules. She cries about how bad Trump has handled this, but then violates the lockdown rules? Yea, she's not serious. All their hype is more about throwing mud at Trump and not about the virus, in short, it's a political hoax.
Re: I think we can solve this (Score:2)
Horseshit. I detest the hypocrisy of the radical left and right, but posing as a 'moderate' and then throwing in the Pelosi stuff at the end as if it adds somehow to your arguement? Lame.
Cherry-picking your post, sure, we all believe in individual liberties but not wearing a mask? You're putting others at risk. Oh, and sure most people don't die of COVID, but how many actually have in the land of the free so far? Look it up, it's depressing reading.
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Way to buy into the fear.. COVID isn't that dangerous for the vast majority of us, that is a fact.
In my county here in in Texas, where we've had just under a thousand COVID related deaths, I can count on my fingers how many people who where not in a high risk group who have died from this. Many more who had no known risk factors died from SARS or H1N1. Heck, if you are not in the high risk population, COVID-19 is about the same as the flu in a bad year, which is dangerous too, but we don't go for total ec
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Many more who had no known risk factors died from SARS
This is almost certainly false. Roughly 770 people died from SARS worldwide. COVID-19's death count is over 900 000 and is still increasing. More people in your county alone have died from COVID-19 than have ever died from SARS.
or H1N1.
This is true, but H1N1 isn't really comparable to COVID-19, since H1N1 is a broad category of flu viruses that includes one responsible for the 1918 flu pandemic. Many countries did, of course, institute lockdowns and quarantines for the 1918 pandemic.
we don't go for total economic shutdown for [the flu] do we?
We usually don't, but then a
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I believe they call it a proxy server. Don't tell anyone.
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Bad idea. That just gives shitholes even more incentive to throw people in prison for petty crimes. If anything, people in prison or on probation of any kind should be banned from being medical test subjects to protect their rights.
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I would like to introduce you to Mr Guantanamo. Say 'Hello".
Re:Test It On Prisoners (Score:5, Informative)
Ironically, the past tense of "To Hang (a person from the gallows)" is "hanged". The past tense of "To hang (an object from anything else)" is "hung".
So, in fact, we hanged those people. We might have hung some objects next to them.
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Ironically, the past tense of "To Hang (a person from the gallows)" is "hanged". The past tense of "To hang (an object from anything else)" is "hung".
Well you learn something new every day! I'd mod you informative if I could.
This is kind of a neat example of why English is hard to learn, I blame the chancery.
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"They said you was hung!"
"And they was right!"
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Your definition appears to be too strict.
According to https://www.merriam-webster.co... [merriam-webster.com]
For both transitive and intransitive senses 1b the past and past participle hung, as well as hanged, is standard. Hanged is most appropriate for official executions but hung is also used.
Hung is more appropriate for less formal hangings
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You're correct, but what's fascinating to me is that the difference between hung and hanged likely developed because of the special cultural/emotional significance of execution. In older sources there's no such difference. Hence OED has this:
1526 Bible (Tyndale) Matt. xviii. f. xxv Yt were better for hym, that a millstone were hanged aboute his necke
As far as I can tell, the original past tense for all uses was probably "hanged". In Old High German, for example, it was "hangeta." There was no vowel change to "hung" until much later.
But something sacred or otherwise "set apart" is harder to change than something mun
Re: Fewer monkey needlessly tortured to death (Score:2)
Okay, fine.
By the way, did you volunteer as a test subject in early vaccine testing?
If not, who do you propose to do it then? Remember, it has to be done on living organisms that are genetically close to humans. So again: who should do it?
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how about we rid ourselves of non-breeding incels that hold back the quality and length of our life? In other words, off yourself.
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No, they're just load on the system and interfering with common sense. Lubrication systems have oil filters to get the crap that interferes with proper operation of a system out, it's the same idea.
Re: My daily experiences with the modern Internet: (Score:2)
Maybe cause your a whiny little cunt who obviously abuses the system
Kindly fuck off and die
-the internet
Only Trump can! His super power has a use! (Score:2)
Trump's super human lack of guilt or empathy, lying, shame and combined with his CULT makes him perfectly suited for this problem!
Simply have Trump get paid a commission for each monkey and he will LIE and say it's a new cure in limited quantity. Sign up for your cure today! Only $99.95. Act Now and he'll give you a share in the Brooklyn Bridge.
It's not like Trump can get into trouble for all the people who DIE as a result...