Weasel Apparently Shuts Down World's Most Powerful Particle Collider (npr.org) 125
New reader mjnhbg1088 cites an article on NPR: A small mammal has sabotaged the world's most powerful scientific instrument. The Large Hadron Collider, a 17-mile superconducting machine designed to smash protons together at close to the speed of light, went offline overnight. Engineers investigating the mishap found the charred remains of a furry creature near a gnawed-through power cable. "We had electrical problems, and we are pretty sure this was caused by a small animal," says Arnaud Marsollier, head of press for CERN, the organization that runs the $7 billion particle collider in Switzerland. Although they had not conducted a thorough analysis of the remains, Marsollier says they believe the creature was "a weasel, probably." The shutdown comes as the LHC was preparing to collect new data on the Higgs Boson, a fundamental particle it discovered in 2012. The Higgs is believed to endow other particles with mass, and it is considered to be a cornerstone of the modern theory of particle physics. CERN says the creature may have been a marten.
Re:Or they could be lying (Score:5, Insightful)
I just want to know how charred something has to be for it to be "probably" a weasel.
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I worked as an analyst for an 911 (fire/ambulance) service in a large city. One day we heard what sounded like a large explosion outside the building and a few of the emergency calltaker consoles went offline. Several dispatchers were unnerved (and it takes it a lot to unnerve 911 folk). They dispatched a fire (pumper) truck to investigate. Outside were the remains of a pigeon. Cooked! It was apparently resting on the power lines outside, and stretched its wings, successfully completing a circuit betw
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A friend of mine used to work on power distribution - stuff in the KV range. He told me he went out to investigate a short near a substation and found a hole in the ground, some blobs of metal and some black sticky gel.
The latter turned out to be fried gipsy. They'd thought the line was off ...
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Too many times I've seen what happens when squirrels get fried on the power lines near my house.
Squirrels are rodents, and their teeth grow continuously. They have to gnaw to wear them down. Weasels don't have that problem, and don't usually gnaw, especially on something inanimate like a cable. I am skeptical that the culprit was a weasel just because a particle physicist said so.
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As a weasel owner (Score:1)
I've had ferrets as pets. Though they may not need to grind down their teeth, they do enjoy chewing on things similar to how dogs and cats do. I've a few gnawed game controller cords etc that can attest to that.
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I would imagine fairly charred but then how much power was running through those cables...
Don't know where is TFA?
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Re: Or they could be lying (Score:4, Interesting)
It was a 66KV sub-transmission supply. If you touch one, you will have possibly been a person. And that is assuming the protection works fast. We had a protection system fail, miles of power line had to be rebuilt and the damage to the area was so great no one knows the cause of the original fault.
Mod paren up as funny (Score:1)
s/paren/parent (Score:1)
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Or it could be aliens from the planet Zorg.
Let's keep speculating here.... ready, set, go!
Actually, it was an alien park ranger. (It's pretty obvious from the lack of interstellar traffic around here that this corner of the galaxy is a nature preserve.)
The ranger was just trying to stop this experiment before we park inhabitants blow ourselves to kingdom come.
get the crowbars ready! (Score:2)
get the crowbars ready!
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Updating the systems manual... (Score:5, Funny)
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I wonder how many job applications they'll be getting from snarky programmers now describing themselves as "deweaselers" ;)
Dr. Kwipke's analysis (Score:2)
They are called weasels for a weason.
Pop... (Score:5, Funny)
...Goes the weasel.
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Mandatory (Score:4, Funny)
IR Baboon is not happy with estupid weasel. [youtube.com]
Re:Mandatory (Score:5, Funny)
Just before the power went down, many people reported hearing words, reverberating throughout the length of the tunnel containing the Large Hadron Collider...
I AM WEASEL!
Michael Dorn has been cleared of all wrongdoing, as numerous eyewitnesses placed him on a California studio lot at the time of the incident.
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words (Score:2)
Enough with these weasel words! I want to know why it shut down, really!
Re:words (Score:4, Funny)
Weaseling out of things is what sets us apart from the animals. Except the weasel....
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Ah, kamikaze bunnies.... [youtube.com] ;)
An appropriate question comes to mind (Score:1)
Was it an African or European weasel?
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I don't know that!
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Perhaps it was a badger...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?... [youtube.com]
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Might sound crazy. . . (Score:3)
These animals may pose a bigger threat to humanity than ISIS. . .
Re:Might sound crazy. . . (Score:4, Funny)
No, a weasel is weasily wecognisable. Stoats are stoatally different.
Weasel / Marten confusion. (Score:2)
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So I guess they suffered a Marten Short.
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It's a charcoal briquet at this point...
Science denying weasel (Score:2, Funny)
For our visual lerners (Score:3)
Reversal (Score:2)
Weasels may be clever, but eagles don't get fried by particle accelerators
So... (Score:2, Funny)
...the LHC was about to destroy the universe and the surviving timeline involved a weasel chewing through a power cable this time.
3rd bass predicted this (Score:2)
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Ferret Helped Get It Going (Score:4, Insightful)
Marten or Martian (Score:1)
Either way, some small furry thing does not want us Earthlings to fondle nature's bosons.
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It was a failed attempt to blow up the earth.
"Where's the Kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth shattering kaboom! "
https://youtu.be/z8rYotiiFP8 [youtu.be]
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so close
not a weasel ... (Score:2)
... a 'communist mole' ...
First a bird, now a weasel (Score:3)
Does everyone remember when a bird with a baguette disabled the LHC? [slashdot.org]
Back then, there was a theory that the LHC could destroy the universe. There is another theory that says any parallel universe that could destroy itself or cause a paradox, is not a possible universe. Therefore, no matter what we do we could never build a universe destroying or paradox generating machine. So much like in H.G. Wells "The Time Machine" something would always happen to prevent the LHC from coming online. I dismissed it as crackpot until the whole bird with baguette thing happened. I'm told the LHC went online, but there is a part of me that just thinks it is all a hoax and we will forever be plagued with storms, earthquake, weasels, or baguettes at the very last moment before startup, until we give up trying to start the dang thing.
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So much like in H.G. Wells "The Time Machine" something would always happen...
Err... when did that happen in The Time Machine?
Or are you thinking of the film (Simon Wells's), which I liked, but had to accept didn't really make sense.
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Even in the not-very-good film, it was the exact opposite situation: It was impossible for him to alter the past in any manner that would *prevent* the construction of the machine, because that would create a paradox.
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There is another theory that says any parallel universe that could destroy itself or cause a paradox, is not a possible universe.
You are confused. Its perfectly possibly to destroy the universe, or at least the earth, its just not possible to observe it because we will all be dead.
So all we could ever observe would have been the LHC failing in increasingly improbable ways. This of course requires a multiverse, but that's the only sensible interpretation of quantum mechanics.
Predicted here: "Hamster in Tutu Shuts Down Large Hadron Collider" [lesswrong.com]
Latest findings (Score:3)
CERN says the creature may have been a marten.
Upon further research, CERN now says the creature was in fact delicious with a dash of Siriacha on it.
added Weasel to bug list (Score:2)
Dark Magic (Score:2)
Stupid martens (Score:3)
Damned martens keep eating my car, too! A couple of months back, one ate the rubber pipe of the break assist and the battery cables. Cost about 200 euros. They are a real problem in middle Europe...
But they're adorable! (Score:1)
what did they expect? (Score:2)
They built it out of such shiny parts.
no, he was nowhere near there (Score:2)
Probably MPAA or RIAA retaliation, (Score:2)
CERN confirms it... (Score:2)
Furries ruin everything.
Plus, it's unlikely getting stuck in a particle collider will give you mutant powers.
Reminds me of the California 55 Freeway extension (Score:2)
One weasel ... Many weasels ... (Score:5, Insightful)
Back in the 1990s a whole bunch of weasels went up against Superconducting Super Collider. The SSC died, and was reduced a mere hole in the ground in the southern suburbs of Dallas, TX. Never underestimate the power of these congress critters.
Pop goes the weasel (Score:2)
I hear it left a real meson the floor.
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Well played, Sir!
A charming comment, and not even off-colour. ;-)
That wascally weasel! (Score:2)
Please, please, please tell me there's some dome-headed scientist with a comical speech impediment engaged in an escalating series of attempts to foil the critter.
Fom this point forward.. (Score:2)
we shall consider a software or hardware issue normally considered a "bug" in a micro device as a "weasel" in a larger device.
Thanks for the clarification!
LHC cancels future plans... (Score:2)
Not just ANY weasel ... (Score:2)
A moment of silence please... (Score:2)
In memory of Schrodinger's Cat, who selflessly gave his life today, in order that the world not be consumed by a man made black hole.
What the Higgs is not (Score:2)
Summary says
The Higgs is believed to endow other particles with mass
I am no specialist, but I understood the Higgs is only used to explain the masses of bosons W+, W- and Z0. It is not involved for other particles.
You know what they say, "eagles may soar... (Score:2)
...but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines." - David Brent
But it turns out they get fried by particle colliders, so it's not all good news.
It is consider by some... (Score:2)
Just to be serious, for a moment (Score:2)
Maybe hum or something that is making them really, really attractive to chew on. But, OTOH, I'd expect everything in the collider to be highly shielded?
IT WASN"T ME! (Score:1)
It's a sign! (Score:1)
The Weasel (Score:1)