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Gates to join Simonyi in Space? 208

gadgetopia writes "On Russian state television, cosmonaut Fyodor Yurchikhin tells journalists in a live video interview from the ISS that "Charles said that Bill Gates is also preparing to visit space"." Gotta wonder what that insurance premium is going to look like.
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Gates to join Simonyi in Space?

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  • d'oh for you... (Score:2, Interesting)

    by joe 155 ( 937621 )
    why did TFS look like

    "On Russian state television, cosmonaut Fyodor Yurchikhin tells journalists in a live video interview from the ISS that "Charles said that a href=" 1066/">Bill Gates is also preparing to visit space"."

    could it be because some one missed a "" and no one seemed to notice... come on editors! its a work day after all...
    • From TFS:

      "Charles said that a Bill Gates is also preparing to visit space"."

      I like that it's A Bill Gates. Makes me wonder if it's THE Bill Gates. Maybe this isn't such a big story after all.
      • Boy, some moderator apparently decided to spray his mod points all over this thread, modding everyone Off Topic. What exactly is the "topic?" Jokes about BSODs in the ISS and 640K being enough to run the Soyuz?

        Maybe you should have begun with "I'll probably get modded Off Topic for this but ..." That's usually enough to warrant an Insightful mod.
  • by nschubach ( 922175 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:28AM (#18687449) Journal
    Where can we donate to the "Leave Bill on the Moon" cause?
    • by bersl2 ( 689221 )
      Well, I don't know about that, but I'm sure a few rogue organizations and governments out there would accept donations in exchange for a few items that would effectively accomplish the same purpose, should he actually enter orbit.

      Not that I approve of something like that.


    • by morgan_greywolf ( 835522 ) * on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:39AM (#18687563) Homepage Journal
      Send $20 via PayPal to morgan_greywolf (at) yahoo (dot) com
    • by nschubach ( 922175 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @09:10AM (#18687859) Journal
      Putting more thought into it....

      I think it would be even better to put all that money into a new paint job for the shuttle. Cover the shuttle till right before launch. Get Bill strapped in and ready. Setup a monitor inside so he can see the revealing and right before launch, unveil a shuttle painted like a huge Tux.
      • by dodobh ( 65811 )
        Actually, you want a gian Windows logo on it. It gives an entirely new meaning to BSOD.
    • I can see it now, <newEnglandAccent>"Ask NOT what your PC can do for you, but what can you pay to keep using your PC..."<newEnglandAccent /> I know it is out of context of President Kennedy's inaugural address, but I am thinking of the follow on statement of, <newEnglandAccent>"I intend to distribute Vista 2.0, using the IPV6, from a permanent Moon Base at the its South Pole within ten years."<newEnglandAccent /> Now; He, who's name is ignored; Has got my attention.
    • by elrous0 ( 869638 ) *
      It's the only place where he isn't under government investigation.
    • I wonder whether Billy Boy checked that NASA doesn't use Windows prior to committing.
      • by brain1 ( 699194 )
        Actually I think we should upgrade all the shuttle's computers to Vista just before launch. That should make BillyG feel right at home! :)
    • A problem has been detected with the lunar return sequence and windows has been shut down to prevent damage to your spacecraft.

      The problem seems to be caused by the following file: lssas@DOOM32.dll.exe


      If this is the first time you've seen this Stop error screen, restart your computer. If this screen appears again, follow these steps:

      Check to make sure that the rocket engines are fueled and ready. If this a new installation ask your hardware or software vendor for any

      • What would be funny if the Russians had a priated version of windows and durring the launched the activation expired.
  • by ThePolkapunk ( 826529 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:30AM (#18687467) Homepage
    Looks like you're missing an anchor tag there. I highly recommend it. They're great for linking!
    Oh wait, this is a story about Bill Gates. Is this a joke about how IE doesn't follow w3 standards for HTML? If so, it's not that funny.
  • Weird (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:33AM (#18687495)

    Charles said that a href=" 1066/
    A really odd thing for Charles to say. How do you pronounce "href", anyway? :)

    On a more serious note, however, the Slashdot editting have reached a new low.
  • by pandrijeczko ( 588093 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:33AM (#18687501) he sits there in his spacesuit in his capsule next to the Russian cosmonaut commander as "Soyuz 12 - Powered by Windows Vista" flashes up on the main control screen just before the primary engine ignition sequence...
  • by qazsedcft ( 911254 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:35AM (#18687521)
    Slashdot provides a link to what Fyodor Yurchikhin said about what Charles Simonyi said about what Bill Gates supposedly intends to do.
    • by mikelieman ( 35628 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:54AM (#18687699) Homepage
      AND it's all about a trip less than 250 miles away, to a toy-space station that doesn't even have any hookers.

      I suggest we put the Las Vegas Chamber of Commerce in charge of developing a REAL moonbase.

      • "I suggest we put the Las Vegas Chamber of Commerce in charge of developing a REAL moonbase."

        That got me thinking: at what altitude are you no longer within a given country's airspace?

        Depending on the anwser, it might be motivation enough for an orbital casino (let alone a lunar one) if it allowed it's proprietors to side-step enough laws (read: blackjack and hookers for everyone).
      • by FleaPlus ( 6935 )
        I suggest we put the Las Vegas Chamber of Commerce in charge of developing a REAL moonbase.

        Coincidentally, Bigelow Aerospace (a company based in Las Vegas) has recently announced their business plans [] for privately-operated space bases. The initial outposts will be in orbit, but Bigelow has also discussed his future plans for lunar bases.
    • The usual. (Score:2, Funny)

      by twitter ( 104583 )

      Slashdot provides a link to what Fyodor Yurchikhin said about what Charles Simonyi said about what Bill Gates supposedly intends to do.

      Windows development is always that way, pawn [], and that's why most people don't bother. Windoze - the only way to win is not to play.

  • by unity100 ( 970058 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:36AM (#18687529) Homepage Journal
    Anyone heard whether Steve Ballmer is thinking of taking the trip too ?
  • Insurance (Score:4, Insightful)

    by Antibore ( 254528 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:39AM (#18687561)
    Why would Gates even have insurance, it's not like he needs one with that wealth.
  • by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:42AM (#18687585)
    Reminds me of an old Ukrainian joke how when Gagarin went into space some guy announced that Russians have gone into space to which the auditory hopefuly asked if all of them and was greatly disapointed to learn that only one.
    • ...and as I recall the jokes told to me by my late Ukrainian father, it's one of the *cleaner* Ukrainian jokes about Russians also!
  • by Aladrin ( 926209 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:49AM (#18687657)
    Joking aside, I wonder exactly what would change should Gates not make it back to the Earth?

    Would his empire fall, or would his second-in-command just jump into his chair and everything continues as usual?

    Would there be a slew of 'secret' things suddenly appear? Would these secrets hurt or help the business? I could see it going either way... Secret projects would probably boost the company as speculation about them flooded the news, but secrets about Gates' personal life would do the opposite, I think.

    I'm pretty sure MS stock would plunge, so not much speculation there.

    Personally, I think we'd be worse off as Gates is sort of held personally accountable for everything Microsoft does, and I think he has a conscience. But if someone else took his place, there would be less personal influence and it'd be the company rampaging out of control. Short term horror, at least... Long term, it'd tear the company apart and be a blessing. But then, everything dies in the long term.
    • Re: (Score:3, Interesting)

      by FredDC ( 1048502 )
      I don't think the impact would be that big for Microsoft. Sure there will probably be a momentary drop of Microsoft stock value, but that won't last long because Microsoft will ensure investors Bill wasn't really that important to the company. Which is true, a large company like microsoft doesn't depend on just one person, everyone is expendable! Even Bill...

      I'm more worried about what would happen to commercialized space travel if such an event would occur. I think it could set back the entire idea by a h
    • I bet the fact that if it's true that he's headed there, I wonder if M$ stocks take a hit.
    • by hey! ( 33014 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @09:45AM (#18688289) Homepage Journal
      It's already fallen.

      Like Andrew Carnegie, Gates is like a bear who went over the mountain, saw another mountain, and being somewhat smarter than the average bear had a shrewd guess about what he'd find on the other side of that mountain.

      We're in the post-Gates era of Microsoft now. If he wanted to be back in charge, he could be, but he's onto phase II of his career, which is not about Microsoft. There'd be no ego gratification, no fun in maintaining the status quo. So he's on to changing the world. It's not an unheard of late career move for the evil genius who has no Sherlock Holmes against whom he can test his mettle. If Spassky hit his mid career, and found the only people left to challenge him played chess like me, he'd have taken up crochet instead.

      What would you do if you had to be Bill Gates, not for day, but every day for, say, the next forty or fifty years? You'd want to do something pretty damned amazing with your life, not only amazing, but amazing compared to what you did with the first half of your life.

      Now you have Microsoft, which is built around Bill Gates ego, except Bill Gates' ego is on to bigger and better things. They're a ghost of their former selves. Seriously, the old Microsoft would not have been humiliated by a startup whose motto was "do no evil". Google would have been crushed or coopted. Crushed and coopted more likely, in whatever order suited Bill Gates master plan best.

      I think we can expect better things from both Gates and Microsoft in the coming years than we've seen from them yet, but the transition is going to be painful for people who are overinvested in Microsoft. Overinvested in more ways than money.

      So, overall, I think people, even Microsoft haters, ought to be rooting for Gates to make it back to the Earth.
      • You know... before I expanded your comment, all I saw was "It's already fallen."

        I was pretty certain this would be just another "LOLZ LINUX RAWKS" post.

        But seriously, I never say this, but MOD THIS UP!! Well said.
      • by Aladrin ( 926209 )
        I'll agree with you that maybe MS doesn't matter as much to Gates as it used to. But as for Gates mattering to MS... Nah. Every news story with his name is massive advertisement for free. Every time he goes to space, donates to charity, and takes pictures with Hooters girls, there's a reporter there and it seems to always make it to national level.

        Everything Gates does is -wonderful- for Microsoft. Especially now that he's on to the 'spend the money' phase of his life.

        You also make a good point about G
        • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

          by hey! ( 33014 )
          I don't deny Gates and MS have a mutually beneficial relationship.

          What I'm saying is that MS is in the position that the Armies of Darkness at the end of a cliche high fantasy novel: once welded into a mighty instrument of hellish terror by the diabolical iron will of the Dark Lord, now bereft of that will they have fallen into pitiable disarray.

          Only in this case the Dark Lord hasn't been banished into the nether dimensions, he's just decided that Evil is no fun if the Forces of Light don't but up a decent
  • by 140Mandak262Jamuna ( 970587 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:53AM (#18687687) Journal
    Gates would go to orbit only if Steve Jobs goes there first. He would not understand why Steve went, but just to be sure he has would not be blind sided like he was with iPod, he would go there.
  • semantics (Score:3, Funny)

    by Ajehals ( 947354 ) <> on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @08:56AM (#18687715) Homepage Journal
    Gates in space? Is that "SpaceLikeWord95" or "SpaceLikeOnASoyuz"?
  • Guess this explains why Gates declined that grassroots group's pleadings that he run for president: Imagine all those Secret Service agents crammed into the space station. 08/1749210 []
  • by pandrijeczko ( 588093 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @09:02AM (#18687773)
    ...and he has to wait three months for a patch to fix it?
  • recreate historical events [], I think Ballmer ought to be the one to go, rather than Gates.
  • Hmm (Score:2, Funny)

    by palmerj3 ( 900866 )
    While marketing Windows Vista Super Ultimate Galactic Edition, Bill Gates was accidentally left at the ISS. Provisions are limited however NASA officials claim Gates will be able to live off a steady diet of old ASP.NET books until a rescue crew arrives.
  • I'd be so into this were he willing to go into space if his craft and mission computers were all running off-the-shelf Vista. Let's see how much faith he really has in his flagship product...
  • Q. What's the difference between a suppository for constipation relief and Bill Gates?

    A. One's a shit in a capsule... the other relieves constipation.

  • Just where is the Great Flaming Asteroid of Doom when you really need it?

    On the other hand, maybe the current "high" in sunspot activities [] will lead to a dramatic solar flare ("sun burps"), with the resultant high velocity expulsion of partially digested, beryllium-infused, greenish-tinted solar matter ("sun vomit" []). This material and the associated cosmic rays will engulf the international space station and cause strange genetic mutations to the inhabitants. When they return to earth they will each have

  • All that goodwill he had gained with his beloved foundation will be undone if he is seen spending his earnings from the windos tax on frivolities like this one. So I expect an ex(t|p)ensive PR campaign that will emphasise all the good Billyboy is doing with his windos loot, like giving away free copies of his coolaid OS to vulnerable countries (in exchange for a crackdown on OS piracy).

    Maybe BabyBush was thinking about this opportunity when he reinstated the missile defense system.
    • if he is seen spending his earnings from the windos tax on frivolities like this one.

      Oh come on, be creative and you can make it into a religious transformation. They can pump out copy about how Mr. Gates, the god, looked down on a "fragile earth" and came away a new man ready to do good for the whole world. He can combine it with some blather about the joys of parenting and might actually fool people into thinking he's changed. M$'s propaganda machine is all about convincing people Mr. Gates is full

  • Countdown (Score:5, Funny)

    by Moggyboy ( 949119 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @09:29AM (#18688075)
    "Houston to Bill, Houston to Bill, do you read Bill?"
    "Loud and clear Houston. Go ahead."
    "Bill, we're all go here. We just need you to push the big red button in front of you."
    "OK Houston, I'm pushing the button, and... huh?"
    "What is it Bill?"
    "This big window just popped up saying 'You do not have privileges to access applications Orbit and Space.' Oh, now the whole screen's gone blue. Is that normal Houston?"
    • by maxwell demon ( 590494 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @10:57AM (#18689219) Journal
      When Bill Gates is on the ISS and wants to go back:
      "Huston, I have a problem."
      "What's your problem, Bill?"
      "I tried to get back to earth, but this damned space ship won't start."
      "You can't get back now."
      "Why not?"
      "You only bought the Space Basic license to get into space."
      "And that means?"
      "The Space Basic license doesn't include the license to return to earth."
      "Ehm ... but I want to return to earth!"
      "Well, no problem. You just have to upgrade your license to Space Premium. Or to Space Ultimate."
      "What's the difference?"
      "Space Ultimate also gives you the license to return to earth alive."
      "Ok, I'll take space ultimate."
      "Fine. The money will be drawn from your bank account. Of course you have to register."
      "Ok ... well, it says I cannot upgrade, because Space Genuine Advantage determined an invalid license."
      "Well, of course you have to have a valid Space Basic or Space Premium license to upgrade."
      "But I do have a valid license. Isn't there a way to circumvent SGA?"
      "Of course not. We certainly have to make sure that only people with valid licenses enter the ISS."
      "But I am already on the ISS."
      "So you must be a space pirate. Sorry, but we don't support space pirates."
  • Pies Please (Score:3, Funny)

    by JMandingo ( 325160 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @09:38AM (#18688191)
    It would be GOLD one of the cosmonauts would pie him in the face as soon as he came through the airlock. GOLD.

    What a mess, though.
  • With a net worth [] equal to three and a half years of NASA's budget, it's a wonder why he doesn't build his own space program to the ISS, instead of simply paying the Russians for a seat. He could probably even build a space armada []. Plus, to be a contender in the world-wide alpha-geek competition [] these days, you've got to go above and beyond what's already been done.
  • ...following yesterday's tragic news concerning the explosion aboard the Soyuz 15 spacecraft which left only one functional spacesuit for either Commander Bill Gates or his co-pilot Bobo The Chimp to attempt Earth re-entry and splashdown into the Black Sea, the Russian Space Agency has just released some good news and pictures of Bobo happily reunited with his chimp troop in Moscow Zoo...
  • They need to send Bill Gate's monkey into space first. You know Steve Ballmer [].
  • by pandrijeczko ( 588093 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @10:02AM (#18688475)
    ...50,000,000 geeks along the Eastern seaboard of the United States simultaneously switched on and off their home lighting to spell "Linux Rocks" in illuminated 500 mile high letters as Mr Gates passed overhead in the Soyuz 15 spacecraft...
  • by sam991 ( 995040 )
    Has there ever been a better chance to start a real life MST3K?

    It would solve all our problems!
  • fastest launch through the stratosphere I can envision....
  • Just curious how long it'll take Bill to return to SECTOR 0 0 1.
  • by Viol8 ( 599362 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @10:46AM (#18689059) Homepage
    Lets just hope Bill has a lovely XPerience and doesn't crash into the Blue Ocean of Death.
  • Maybe he's spying on someone. []
  • by MrSteveSD ( 801820 ) on Wednesday April 11, 2007 @11:35AM (#18689843)
    I feel that if Bill Gates does travel into space, the guidance system of the vehicle he travels in should be changed over to run on Microsoft Windows in his honour.
  • Nah - every other man and his dog has already been there and done that, so where is the big thrill for Bill ?

    My guess is that he is lining up for the first solo manned landing on the Sun. Ill spare $100 to fund that.
  • Except he won't need a rocket to put him into orbit. He just needs to sit down on the only chair in Ballmer's office and tell him he's going to Google.
  • It is funny that Paul appears to the be the true visionary. Paul jumped into doing internet over cable in 1991. In addition, he jumped into the space race (backing burt rutan) back in 2003.

    But the good news on this, is that it could create a true space race amongst the wealthy who will fund this. Combine this with Bigelows annoncement of going to the moon and it looks like we will be on the moon by 2015 with BASES. []
    • by Soko ( 17987 )
      But the good news on this, is that it could create a true space race amongst the wealthy who will fund this. Combine this with Bigelows annoncement of going to the moon and it looks like we will be on the moon by 2015 with BASES.

      ...and with his kind of money, all of our BASES will belong to Bill. ;-)

  • Gates could easily afford to build his own spacecraft and his own space station but instead he's going to use some cheap Russian company to make the trip. That's certainly not what I'd do if I had the money.
    1. Tell him the space station is running Windows for Airlocks.
    2. See if he still goes.
  • has a BSOD while Bill is on board!
    Please oh please have a BSOD!!!

  • India has a "home grown" polar satellite launch vehicle now [] so if Gates wants people to take his stand in favor of unlimited H-1b engineers imported to the US [] seriously, he should launch himself to space on that vehicle.
  • ....Bill will indeed fly into space and following in the tradition of John Denver and Sonny Bono, die stupidly in an accident.

    Sure there are no pine trees in space, but he'll be going a bit faster than the 40-50 mph Sonny Bono was when he snacked on instant pine nuts.

    And everyone knows that the quality of Russian spacecraft is nothing like John Denver's ultralight plane that pinwheeled into the's probably worse.

The best defense against logic is ignorance.