Brain Implants Get Brainier 49
the_newsbeagle writes "Did my head just beep?" wonders a woman who just received a brain implant to treat her intractable epilepsy. We're entering a cyborg age of medicine, with implanted stimulators that send pulses of electricity into the brain or nervous system to prevent seizures or block pain. The first generation of devices sent out pulses in a constant and invariable rhythm, but device-makers are now inventing smart stimulators that monitor the body for signs of trouble and fire when necessary.
Entering? Cyborgs? (Score:3, Insightful)
Oh shut up. Pacemakers have been around for decades.
Re:Entering? Cyborgs? (Score:5, Informative)
While some pacemakers are programmable, they are not "smart stimulators that monitor the body for signs of trouble and fire when necessary".
On the contrary, that's exactly what they are. From Wikipedia's pacemaker page [wikipedia.org]:
Modern pacemakers usually have multiple functions. The most basic form monitors the heart's native electrical rhythm. When the pacemaker does not detect a heartbeat within a normal beat-to-beat time period, it will stimulate the ventricle of the heart with a short low voltage pulse.
The earliest ones simply stimulated the heart at regular intervals, but this newer variety that monitors the heart for signs of trouble (e.g. irregular heartbeat) and fires when necessary has been around for decades.
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Re:Entering? Cyborgs? (Score:4, Insightful)
Modern pacemakers are exactly that. They can detect when they need to pace and how much and can also act as internal defibrillators.
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Modern pacemakers are exactly that. They can detect when they need to pace and how much and can also act as internal defibrillators.
Unfortunately there is no such thing as a brain pacemaker at this time.
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Someone didn't read TFA
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>Unfortunately there is no such thing as a brain pacemaker at this time.
You only need half a "brain pacemaker" in the USA. Half a brain is all you will find.
Search for "brain" on slashdot == "Zero results found"
Now, don't go away mad, just go the fuck away!
Why would I be mad when you have so eloquently proven my point.
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The sad thing is: at some examination, the doctors re-programmed it so it would only stimulate the heart at a rate of 40 bpm (or was it that it would only kick in below 40 bpm), but didn't tell my father about it. Though very fine before this secret intervention, since they had changed these settings,
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How many people would take a job that gave them almost anything they could imagine, and took no time or effort?
With the right restrictions (especially the right to quit, proper care for the body, and access to data about what it's being used for) why would that be a bad thing?
Sci fi (Score:4, Interesting)
The thing is, we're getting there. These are no longer science fiction: the path to each of these abilities is very clear. And when these abilities converge we'll have matrix style give-me-knowledge-now and complete VR. Not to mention brain augmentation. This future is far, far closer than it seems.
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We're "getting there" in the same sense that the Wright brother's airplane was "getting there" compared to a modern passenger jet or fighter plane.
Probably not as close as you think... (Score:3)
The thing is, we're getting there. These are no longer science fiction: the path to each of these abilities is very clear. And when these abilities converge we'll have matrix style give-me-knowledge-now and complete VR. Not to mention brain augmentation. This future is far, far closer than it seems.
I'd love to think that you're right, but to paraphrase the old Sidney Harris cartoon [ohio-state.edu], I think you need to be more explicit in your last step. Even if we could stitch up the whole brain with safe and robust wires and sensors, knowledge encoding is still largely a blank map.
Of course, broad- and fine-scale read/write hardware interfaces to the brain will give us a big boost toward figuring out the harder stuff. But that's going to be a massive undertaking, and outside of hand-waving "superintelligent machines
Re:Sci fi (Score:4, Insightful)
In terms of brain implants, we are at the Peg-Leg level of sophistication. We can offer them a solution that will help with some problems, but it isn't a case where we can solve all the problems.
So something that detects that a seizure will happen then does a pulse to stop it. Will help stop the seizure, but not cure all the problems, as well it may bring in some side effects, because the brain so so complicated.
However for some reason we have been polarized to a point that we really can't judge tradeoffs any more. We want a 100% cure. We want our food to be 100% healthy and fill us up, and meet the taste we are craving, we want technology to Run Fast, Use little power, and be tiny. We want our contractors to be Cheap, Fast and Good.
The fact that we live in this imperfect world, seems to have a lot of people paralyzed to the idea of progress where progress will sometimes means there will be a tradeoff.
Summary says nothing (Score:2)
DIMM (Score:1)
This sounds promising. I could use a memory upgrade.
ob. Crichton (Score:2)
20 comments and no reference to The Terminal Man?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/... [wikipedia.org]
A.
The challenge with brain implants (Score:2)
Apple pPod (Score:2)
I've had an Apple pPod implant for several years. Love it. Best thing is direct access to the the Apple Store 24/7 and no bugs or malware*(^&&^*&^%-system-i98798-breach......
http://sugarmtnfarm.com/2012/0... [sugarmtnfarm.com]
802.11b(rain) (Score:2)
I can't wait till some marketing douchebag discovers that medical implants can be "connected" to the so-called Internet of Things", ostensibly for "quality assurance" and patient safety purposes. Then bingo! we have targeted advertising delivered straight to the visual cortex.
Soon after, law enforcement will no doubt demand access to the data.
This can not end well.
When can I get a bionic eye? (Score:2)
I'll be first in line.
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Free prostate exam: Room 11
Bionic eye implants: Room 1!
The MPAA and RIAA appluad this good work (Score:2)
Just imagine.
Whenever you see or hear anything copyrighted, the brain implant can automatically charge your credit card. Now that's convenience!
This will be good for all. Everyone knows that protecting content is the highest goal and priority of mankind. Pirates are lawbreakers. Lawbreakers should not be allowed* to break the law.
Your fiends at the MPAA and RIAA.
* only the MPAA and RIAA should be all
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They will charge you when you decide to listen to something, not when you hear or see it.
Is it me (Score:1)
At least not until we start integrating our brain implants into the Internet of "Things". Gonna take a mu metal hat to block that shit.
VERY CRUDE TREATMENT (Score:2)