Curious NASA Pre-Announcement 286
CrtxReavr was one of a small avalanche of readers to let us know about a
press conference NASA scheduled for Thursday at 2pm to discuss an "astrobiology finding that will impact the search for evidence of extraterrestrial life." I've heard rumors ranging from "proof of life on Titan" to "first contact," depending on how optimistic/crazy you are.
Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Insightful)
Methinks you might want to expand your range at the bottom a bit. I suspect it will be something along the lines of "We've discovered evidence that some precursor to life may have been present on this extraterrestrial body--or may not, depending heavily on your interpretation of some very ambiguous data."
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Funny)
You just had to ruin it, didn't you?
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:4, Funny)
Then again it's too classic, so it definitely have to be MASS RELAY FOUND IN PLUTONIAN ORBIT!
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Funny)
I am hoping for a GCU so I can get my god damn drug glands.
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:4, Funny)
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Mass relay? (Score:2)
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You mean if you subscribe to the first book, or the movies AND the rest of the books in the series.
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I remember being really annoyed to find that the vicinity of Jupiter, including Ganymede, was subject to sufficient radiation to guarantee that there never would be a "Farmer in the Sky", at least not there.
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that comet they swooshed by recently
Comet feels swooshed
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That's far too wordy.
NASA could take a tip from Apple's Marketting department.
Nasa? Seriously? Just get any one of your guys to go any old bar. Leave a moon-rock sample or whatever it is you've found on a table there, someone will find it and post about it on their blog and it'll drive people into hysteria.
None of this "Scheduling announcements" - just deny absolutely everything about what you might actually want to announce and let the geeks build it up.
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In NASA's defense, they always have some great animation to go along with their press conferences. It's the only deliverable they consistently produce.
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Informative)
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Funny)
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It probably has to do with the recent discovery of oxygen on saturn's moon Rhea.
Doubtful, for two reasons: (a) that has already been announced, and (b) the oxygen there has a plausible nonbiological origin (energetic particles in Saturn's magnetic field interacting with water ice on the surface).
The smart money says this press announcement will be disappointing to most people. Not unlike like the whole Apple/Beatles thing.
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The smart money says this press announcement will be disappointing to most people.
Which is why I think it's about oxygen on Rhea.
It will probably be something like, "You know about the trace amounts of oxygen on Rhea, but we put some streptococcus bacteria in a similar concentration of oxygen, and they survived for 3 days!"
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Informative)
It probably has to do with the recent discovery of oxygen on saturn's moon Rhea.
Doubtful, for two reasons: (a) that has already been announced, and (b) the oxygen there has a plausible nonbiological origin (energetic particles in Saturn's magnetic field interacting with water ice on the surface).
The smart money says this press announcement will be disappointing to most people. Not unlike like the whole Apple/Beatles thing.
Extra doubtful that it's about Rhea because Carolyn Porco, the head of the Cassini project, isn't on the list of participants.
Doing a few minutes' worth of work in Google comes to the following information about the listed participants in the press conference:
Mary Voytek -- director, NASA Astrobiology program
Felisa Wolfe-Simon -- evolutionary biology including metallic enzymes, specifically the potential role of arsenic in DNA
Pamela Conrad -- biogeochemistry and organic chemical signatures of extremophiles
Steven Benner -- geobiology of RNA, including detection of DNA and RNA
James Elser -- the influence of nitrogen and phosphorus in biological processes including ecosystems, speciation and RNA
Since the announcement of the press conference says that the finding will impact the "search for evidence of extraterrestrial life," chances are they've found some potential signature of a metabolic process. Notwithstanding what I said above about Carolyn Porco, Cassini flew within 100 km of Rhea earlier this year (March) to "determine what is coming off Rhea" according to NASA's site on the flyby. The timing (March to December) fits well with the amount of time it takes to do data analysis, write a paper, and have it accepted for publication for something that gets fast-tracked. Science is published on Fridays. Nature is published on Thursdays. It would seem like the paper is going to appear in Nature no matter what the exact announcement is.
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Insightful)
Since the announcement of the press conference says that the finding will impact the "search for evidence of extraterrestrial life," chances are they've found some potential signature of a metabolic process.
Hmmm... taking what you said about the lack of the Cassini project lead to heart, and noting a lack of anyone attached to any particular observatory project in that list... Is it possible that the announcement won't actually be about a particular astronomical observation at all?
Could it be that these scientists have discovered a plausible biological reaction which could take place in different extraterrestrial environments that simply gives them something new to look for in the future? That would count as an astrobiological finding, and would certainly impact the search for evidence of life.
But would be liable to be even more disappointing to many people. :)
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:4, Interesting)
Not unlike like the whole Apple/Beatles thing. What was so disappointing about that?
If you didn't already have better copies of the Beatles music before it was available in the iTunes store, and wanted a few obscure tracks that weren't available on any of the "hits" collections, then maybe that was an exciting announcement.
But, based on the sales figures, it looks like converting your own CDs to MP3 for your music player isn't as easy as I thought it was, as millions of people in the US wanted Beatles music but had been waiting 20+ years for somebody to convert the files for them.
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:4, Informative)
The version on iTunes are MP3s made from the 24-bit, 44KHz remaster from last year. Like every remaster for the past 15 years or so, it has dynamic range compression applied.
This results in several things:
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NASA will hold a news conference at 2 p.m. EST on Thursday, Dec. 2, to discuss an astrobiology finding that will impact the search for evidence of extraterrestrial life. Astrobiology is the study of the origin, evolution, distribution and future of life in the universe.
For the "future of life" bit, could be something cool relating to our ability to live in space. After all, our current body of evidence suggests that we're the future of extraterrestrial life (speculation about Thursday notwithstanding).
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Which will, of course, be picked up be the media as "NASA finds extraterrestrials!" instead of the more accurate "NASA finds preliminary evidence of microbial life." And then stupid people will feel betrayed when it's explained to them that, no, this does not mean little grey men with probes.
Why people continue to fall for sensationalist reporting is beyond me, it's getting really really predictable. Or maybe I'm just getting old.
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:5, Funny)
"NASA finds extraterrestrials...Little Grey Men With Probes," Says Slashdot Poster RsG!
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:4, Funny)
...no, this does not mean little grey men with probes.
You mean, the TSA? (Sorry, I just couldn't resist the opportunity!)
Re:Ranging from proof of life to first contact? (Score:4, Funny)
My guess is that it's more like "We are the extra terrestrials. Pay no attention to wikileaks."
Just wait till Wikileaks dumps extra terrestrials data.
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This is very close to: "astrobiology finding that will impact the search for evidence...."
Or... is something amazing we're about find out within the recent Wikileak
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Mmmmm. Seafood. (Score:4, Funny)
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It tastes the same as anything else: like chicken.
Re:Mmmmm. Seafood. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Mmmmm. Seafood. (Score:4, Funny)
Sure it does. You just have to adjust your expectations for what chicken tastes like.
Fresh frozen waterworld food. (Score:3, Funny)
I only deal with meta-chicken. Not a metaphor, but instead, meta-fried.
Once, there was a murder of crows who were harassing some horses in the paddock near my barn. I yelled at them, told them that corral-ation wasn't caws-ation, but apparently they thought I was simply winging it.
Also:
Linux is forking good
And Windows is forking not.
I'm speaking of course
Of a call in the source
Just one of them has got
If you need your code
To go down both roads
When choice becomes a Y
Then Linux is better
The
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Re:Mmmmm. Seafood. (Score:5, Funny)
It tastes Europaean.
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Re:Mmmmm. Seafood. (Score:4, Funny)
African or Europaean swallow?
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If there is life swimming in a big ocean under the ice of Europa, the question becomes: how does it taste?
Like Tasty Wheat, of course. You remember Tasty Wheat?
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If there is life swimming in a big ocean under the ice of Europa, the question becomes: how does it taste?
Like a dog with no tongue.
they found that the astrobiology budget was cut (Score:4, Insightful)
they found that the astrobiology budget was cut
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Titan seems plausible (Score:5, Informative)
http://news.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474978743812
Just idle speculation (Score:5, Informative)
He's now updated his post with a tweet from someone at Nasa that the press conference is not about proof of life:
I'm sad to quell some of the @kottke-induced excitement about possible extraterrestrial life. I've seen the Science paper. It's not that [twitter.com]
The Mars Rock (Score:2)
Last I heard, interpretation the Mars rock was "inconclusive."
Maybe they've figured something out.
How About We Scale It Back to Something Realistic? (Score:2)
Think about it though. Would NASA announce contact or, you know, the president? I'm guessing that the politicians would be all over this claiming credit if it was something that
Did they find the ancient gene? (Score:5, Funny)
Did they find the ancient gene?
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Please leave KISS out of this.
It's smoke and mirrors (Score:3, Funny)
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Stretch? Wait, just how invasive has the Freedom Patdown gotten anyway?
ya? (Score:2, Interesting)
I am totally jaded. When I see something like this I read it as "NASA calls press conference to remind government and people they are still here and need money, because what they do is really, really cool". Of course, I agree too, but I would be surprised if there was really any kind of life found. Prove me wrong NASA! I, for one, would welcome our new alien-insect overlords!
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The astrobiological finding is probably that their budget has been cut, once again, and the impact it has on the search for evidence of ET Life is that they won't anymore.
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NASA Administrator: We're putting a man on Mars!
Reporter: When?
NASA Administrator: 2055!
Reporter: Long after your administration is gone and no longer around to be held accountable for any long-forgotten promises?
NASA Administrator Yep!
Reporter: What if 2055 comes along and we're no closer then to Mars than now?
NASA Administrator: Well, you'll have to ask the NASA administrator about it then.
Reporter: What if you're still alive and we ask you?
NASA Administrator: I'll blame him.
Reporter: Do you have anything
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Well, we could do that. Or we could stop kidding ourselves and cut their funding altogether.
Or we could keep doing what we're doing now--just throwing the money away with no hope of it ever returning an actual result.
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Fuck, just make NASA a branch of the military and you assholes will salute every wheelbarrow of cash that trundles past.
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Tell lord Cthulu that current seven out of ten astrologers agree that it is not yet time for him to reawaken, and to take some damn sominex if he cant go back to sleep.
Amazing news (Score:4, Funny)
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That is a film I don't want to see at 11.
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"...explore strange new worlds"
What's up, doc? (Score:2)
Maybe Bugs Bunny found Marvin?
First contact? (Score:2)
The aliens wouldn't happened to be named either G'Gugvuntt or Vl'hurgs, would they?
Oh, I know (Score:4, Funny)
First contact probably went like this... (Score:2)
First contact probably went like this:
NASA: "hello, you extremophile procariot. Take us to your leader"
""
NASA: "hmm, he's being uncooperative. TASE him!"
""
NASA: BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
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No, a Procariot is someone from Procyon, like how a Cypriot is someone from Cyprus.
Taking a page from Apple? (Score:2)
It is probably all marketing fluff. NASA is taking a page from Apple.
Probably Beatles music has been beamed in the direction of Alpha Centuri.
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Um, 3 - profit???
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No, no, I'm sure it's the First Contact thing - that's the only reasonable assumption.
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Probably Beatles music has been beamed in the direction of Alpha Centuri.
Big mistake. A little over four years from now:
"War Leader Kqaac, our translators say that the Earthlings believe that all you need is love."
"Excellent, then the Earthlings have no defenses! Launch the attack fleets!"
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Probably Beatles music has been beamed in the direction of Alpha Centuri.
Not going to happen. Perhaps the biggest copyright wtf in the history of humanity: "Astronomer and science popularizer Carl Sagan had wanted [Here Comes The Sun] to be included on the Voyager Golden Record, copies of which were attached to both spacecraft of the Voyager program to provide any entity that recovered them a representative sample of human civilization. Although The Beatles favoured the idea, EMI refused to release the rights and when the probes were launched in 1977 the song was not included."
another universe? (Score:2)
Maybe we found another universe....
"I have reached the Gateway to another Universe. I feel awed and strangely humbled by the momentous solemnity of this occasion..."
"HEY OTHER UNIVERSE! BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS!"
Word of the Day (Score:3, Funny)
http://www.google.com/search?q=grandstanding [google.com]
My guess (Score:3, Interesting)
Spectroscopy showing a celestial body (or bodies) is in a state of chemical disequilibrium considered to be suggestive of life.
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That's just what I was going to say!
More or less... I read "astrobiology finding that will impact the search for evidence of extraterrestrial life" as exactly that with the implied addition of "we found a promising target for a future mission! So we'll be needing to keep our jobs and get some more funding, tenkyuvedymuch."
Frungy Frungy Frungy (Score:5, Funny)
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Kowalski, Fritz, Chin, O'Donnell, Luigi, and all three of the Liebermann Triplets will be missed.
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The Loc-Nar! (Score:2)
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Please please please (Score:5, Funny)
More earth-shattering than that (Score:2)
"We called you all here today so that we may announce that we can actually make budget next year AND do something with it! WOOOOOOO!"
(stunned gasps from audience)
Deception Point (Score:2)
If you don't mind bad science but a decent story, check out Deception Point by Dan Brown.
tldr; NASA fakes ET for more funding.
Maybe Titan...Maybe Earth's Shadow Biosphere. (Score:5, Interesting)
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I think we have a winner here. The article you linked mentions that she expects to see results over the next several months and was written slightly more than a year ago. That gives enough time to get results, tweak the experiment, analyze the results, even completely re-run the experiment if you think the results are ground breaking enough. The time span seems right, the other speakers are in related fields, it has direct influence on astrobiology. Specifically, it makes Titan a very interesting place
Fantastic News! (Score:2)
"proof of life on Titan" to "first contact,"
How about the fanatically optimistic view: "First contact by civilization on Titan."
Sigh... (Score:2)
(very publicly/loudly) "Proof of extraterrestrial life!"
(very privately/quietly and AFTER grant money comes through) "Whoops, sorry, it was actually a normal crystal formation"
Water Found on Third Planet from Sol! (Score:2)
No first contact.... (Score:2)
.... instead the NASA managed a "first post" on slashdot story. Sources are cited that chances for that are slightly lower than finding intelligent life on Mars or GOP convention.
The invasion begins in 15 minutes.... (Score:2)
Run!!!
The found (Score:2)
Reptilian humanoids. (Score:2)
What else could it be?
Documents (Score:4, Funny)
Not only alien life, they have a trove of hundreds of thousands of documents from the alien government! Describing advanced graft and corruption abilities that are centuries beyond our own!
A few clues.... (Score:5, Interesting)
If you look at the list of participants, it may provide a clue:
Participants are:
- Mary Voytek, director, Astrobiology Program, NASA Headquarters, Washington
- Felisa Wolfe-Simon, NASA astrobiology research fellow, U.S. Geological Survey, Menlo Park, Calif.
- Pamela Conrad, astrobiologist, NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center, Greenbelt, Md.
- Steven Benner, distinguished fellow, Foundation for Applied Molecular Evolution, Gainesville, Fla.
- James Elser, professor, Arizona State University, Tempe
If you follow up the connection of James Elser to NASA, it turns out to be a project called "Follow the Elements"
http://astrobiology.asu.edu/Astrobiology/Home/Home.html [asu.edu]
So I'm guessing that they've found certain exo-planets in the Goldilocks zone that have the right balance of precursor elements/molecules for life.
Dr Felisa Wolfe-Simon's work. (Score:5, Informative)
I wonder if it's big enough to. . . (Score:4, Insightful)
I wonder if this will be big enough news to distract people from the scandals arising from the Wikileaks thing.
Also, look for Octo-Moms to lead police on high-speed chases in Black SUVs over the coming days. Down a well.
-FL
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OMFG I don't think I want to wait till Thursday
"...if it wasn't for disappointment,
I wouldn't have any appointments!"