The Gulf's Great Turtle Relocation Project 104
An anonymous reader writes "All along the Gulf Coast's beaches it's turtle-hatching season. Conservationists knew the poor hatchlings wouldn't have a chance if they swam out into the oily waters of the Gulf, so they came up with an incredibly ambitious plan: they would dig up 70,000 turtle eggs, carefully raise them in a climate-controlled hanger at the Kennedy Space Center, and release the hatchlings into the clean Atlantic waters off Florida's east coast. Now that project is well underway, and Discover Magazine has pictures of the first batch of hatchlings crawling toward the welcoming waves. But there's a chance all this do-gooding won't do any good. New Scientist found experts who argue that releasing them into the Atlantic rather than into the Gulf will screw up the turtles' navigation systems, which will prevent them from following their normal migratory routes."
Re:Which beach? (Score:5, Funny)
They will dutifully crawl out of the ocean and back into the KSC hangar in which they were raised. We'll subsequently hear about some rocket failing to achieve orbit when a clutch of turtle eggs mysteriously causes some malfunction.
Sad (Score:4, Funny)
We may soon see a rash of BP stations being razed with the only clue being some discarded pizza boxes.
best thing is to try both ideas (Score:3, Funny)
release 1/2 from the sand
release 1/2 out to sea
Then we'll know, right ?
Re:Look at the bright side (Score:5, Funny)
That's true, but we can only try to mitigate this disaster as best we can, or sit back and complain about those who are trying to fix it. Your choice.
This is slashdot. Brace yourself.
Re:Sad (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Look at the bright side (Score:3, Funny)
This is slashdot. Brace yourself.
Bracing yourself is futile, and only idiots would try it.
Re:Sure, I can see the disadvantage... (Score:5, Funny)
- Turtles grow to their teenage years, mutate and then move into the city sewers placing a strain on pizza joints who are unable to figure out where to deliver the pizza.
Re:always nay-sayers (Score:3, Funny)
It kind of surprises me that no one has ever taken a turtle from Texas and put it in the ocean in Florida just to see what would happen.
Well, that's my vacation plans settled.
Airline Check-in in Texas: "Two for Florida? Um, where's the other passenger?"
Me: "It's this here turtle."
On the airplane . . .
Me: "Stewardess, another Martini for me and another squid for the turtle."
Stewardess: "I think you've had enough, sir."
Me: "Don't worry, the turtle is driving."
Re:What Food? (Score:5, Funny)
Indeed, and when those poor turtles have been exposed to all the toxic mutagens in the oil and the weird chemical dispersants that have been employed, we could all be in serious trouble once they become teenagers...
G.
How far? (Score:1, Funny)
Do they just need to rescue the turtles on the surface, or is it turles all the way down?
Turtle relocation is easy (Score:5, Funny)
RIGHT 90
RIGHT 90
FORWARD 100
crossovers (Score:2, Funny)
Anyone else feeling a TMNT / Captain Planet crossover right about now?
Re:Look at the bright side (Score:4, Funny)
This is slashdot. Brace yourself.
You're imagining a Beowulf cluster of turtle hatchlings, aren't you.
Re:Sure, I can see the disadvantage... (Score:3, Funny)
"Winter feeding grounds... I think"
"You're going the wrong way"
"Damn humans. Mind if I follow you?"
"Be my guest."