Creating a Quantum Superposition of Living Things 321
KentuckyFC writes "Having created quantum superpositions of photons, atoms, and even molecules, scientists are currently preparing to do the same for larger objects — namely viruses. The technique will involve storing a virus in a vacuum and then cooling it to its quantum-mechanical ground state in a microcavity. Zapping the virus with a laser then leaves it in a superposition of its ground state and an excited one. That's no easy task, however. The virus will have to survive the vacuum, behave like a dielectric, and appear transparent to the laser light, which would otherwise tear it apart. Now a group of researchers has worked out that several viruses look capable of surviving the superposition process, including the common flu virus and the tobacco mosaic virus. They point out that after creating the superposition, scientists will be able to perform the Schrodinger's Cat experiment for the first time, which should be fun (but less so for the virus)."
There *is* no virus... (Score:1, Funny)
I implore you, (Score:4, Funny)
What if Schrodinger was wrong? (Score:1, Funny)
Will looking in a box for a cat that may or may not exist destroy the universe? Tune in and find out!
Hasn't Schrodingers Cat been through enough? (Score:4, Funny)
Uh oh! (Score:4, Funny)
The virus will be both dead and alive! So this is how the zombie plague will begin...
That's how I pick up chicks (Score:1, Funny)
At the physics conventions....my best pickup line is always "hey baby, want to go back and create a quantum superposition of living things?"
There is only... Super Virus! (Score:5, Funny)
Seriously, people, anyone who has read comic books knows that strange scientific experiments involving lasers, quantum mechanics and viruses can only lead to an acute case of superheroitis.
Reckless world-line creation! (Score:4, Funny)
Since the collapse of the state vector is an illusion caused by the entanglement of the experimenter with the experiment, whereupon the experimenter (now in a superposition of states) can only measure one outcome, this recless creation of macromolecular superpositions will deplete the multiverse's supply of world-lines and immanentize the eschaton. We'll have doppelgangers racing madly through the streets, and it will all end in tears.
Re:Hasn't Schrodingers Cat been through enough? (Score:4, Funny)
Are you sure about that? I am pretty sure the cat died years ago, but I haven't checked.
Re:Scale to larger living things? (Score:4, Funny)
I'm not certain that this technique will scale to cats.
Don't worry, the next step up from viruses are lawyers. Since they have to put them in a vacuum and hit them with a laser, line 'em up and put it on Youtube ... in the name of science!
Re:There is only... Super Virus! (Score:1, Funny)
Re:I implore you, (Score:5, Funny)
The ASPCMOTMOMNBA?
You, sir, need to work on your organization names.
Let me suggest a few:
The Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Questionable Under Examination To Zoological Life Characterization Organisms Almost This (.) Large.
The SPC-QUETZLCOATL is, of course, dedicated to the humane treatment of viruses, and should not be confused with the SPCQ, which is dedicated to the humane treatment of feathered-serpent redeemer/savior archetypal figures.
Also it should be noted that the (.) in the official name of the organization is a tiny dot in parentheses, not a ASCII boobie, no matter how much you'd like it to be one.
Re:Reckless world-line creation! (Score:3, Funny)
Since the collapse of the state vector is an illusion caused by the entanglement of the experimenter with the experiment, whereupon the experimenter (now in a superposition of states) can only measure one outcome, this recless creation of macromolecular superpositions will deplete the multiverse's supply of world-lines and immanentize the eschaton. We'll have doppelgangers racing madly through the streets, and it will all end in tears.
Close but what's really going to happen is that we are going to put this virus in a superposition where it will enter a world that is parallel to ours. That world will be a virtual utopia ... until our virus hits it. At which point they'll realize that we have just declared germ warfare on them and they will unify to work against the degenerative subpositioned attackers who they have done no harm. After millennia of trying to coexist peacefully with us, we will feel their true wrath and power ... as horrors blink into existence on a subposition to begin the onslaught on us.
Uwe Boll will direct with a nod toward Steven Seagal to play the initial superpositioned virus sent over.
Wrong field (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Is this necessary? (Score:5, Funny)
To an outside observer, I am now in a superposed state of understanding and totally not understanding your comment...
Re:Viruses don't live (Score:4, Funny)
Sure. That's why we call them "no-life".
Re:that's not the point (Score:4, Funny)
it's not less alive, per-say, than a single celled amoeba or an atom
Wut?
Terrible idea (Score:5, Funny)
I can see it now...
Me: Tell me Doc, do I have HIV?
Doctor: Well, yes and no.
Re:There is only... Super Virus! (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Viruses don't live (Score:3, Funny)
They're only MOSTLY dead!
Re:That's how I pick up chicks (Score:4, Funny)
"This is amazing! I'm coming/not-coming at the same time!"
"Nice try. I observed you ejaculating three seconds into it."
Re:Terrible idea (Score:3, Funny)
You know what I can't stand about Slashdot? (Score:5, Funny)
The smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste the Slashdotters' stink and every time I do, I fear that I've somehow been infected by it.
Re:Is this necessary? (Score:1, Funny)
Quick, somebody hit him over the head with a 2x4 and collapse his probability wave.
Re:Reckless world-line creation! (Score:5, Funny)
Since the collapse of the state vector is an illusion caused by the entanglement of the experimenter with the experiment, whereupon the experimenter (now in a superposition of states) can only measure one outcome, this recless creation of macromolecular superpositions will deplete the multiverse's supply of world-lines and immanentize the eschaton. We'll have doppelgangers racing madly through the streets, and it will all end in tears.
Seems no less reasonable than the wiki writeup on superposition. QM reads to me like high-brow White Zombie lyrics, just words rammed together with no inherent meaning. Stick a few "motherfuckers", "yeahs" and obscure movie quotes in there and I think we'd have it. I'm sure it makes sense to some people but I'd need a contact high to grok it.
THE DEAD HAVE COME BACK TO LIFE!The Hamiltonian gives the rate at which the particle has an amplitude to go from m to n. YEAH! The reason it is multiplied by i AMBIENT SCREAMING SOUNDSis that the condition that U is unitary translates to the condition: YEAH MOTHERFUCKER YEAH! which says that H is Hermitian. The eigenvalues of the Hermitian matrix H are real quantities which have a physical interpretation as energy levels. PSYCHOLOIC SLAG SUCKING JUICE FROM A FALLEN ANGEL If the factor i were absent, the H matrix would be antihermitian and would have purely imaginary eigenvalues, which is not the traditional way quantum mechanics represents observable quantities like the energy.INSANE CLOWN LAUGHTER
Re:There is only... Super Virus! (Score:4, Funny)
Great, now I have to hear my doctor say, Um, it seems you completed the full course of antibiotics...but it turns out it only attacked the inert state of your disease. The virulent, flesh-eating superposition continues unchecked.
Re:Wrong field (Score:3, Funny)
Sir, we have chosen YOU to be the star of our next experiment. Being the oldest Slashdotter still not officially declared completely dead, you fit perfectly! Please sign here. Oh, and here... It's just a minor thing about getting frozen and then ripped apart by a giant laser. Nothing that should distract you. Here, a new /. article for you! *takes out his tiny victim-catching net*
Re:There is only... Super Virus! (Score:5, Funny)
Virii is not a word. The plural is 'viruses.'
If that's true, then what are infecting my boxen?
Just What We Need (Score:4, Funny)
Schrodinger's Flu!
Re:Viruses don't live (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Viruses don't live (Score:4, Funny)
We know what viruses do and don't do. Arguing about whether they're "alive" or not is purely semantics and is not a scientific question at all.
But it's important! See, this 4th level AD&D spell affects, according to its definition "all living things within 5 feet of the target position". I must know whether it'll wipe out a virus! The fate of the world depends upon it!