Colbert Wins Space Station Name Contest 471
As we speculated a couple of weeks back, it has come to pass. Reader mknewman writes to tell us that comedian Stephen Colbert has won the vote to have his name immortalized (or at least until it crashes) as the moniker on NASA's newest addition to the International Space Station. We can but wonder what NASA will do now. "NASA's mistake was allowing write-ins. Colbert urged viewers of his Comedy Central show, 'The Colbert Report' to write in his name. And they complied, with 230,539 votes. That clobbered Serenity, one of the NASA choices, by more than 40,000 votes. Nearly 1.2 million votes were cast by the time the contest ended Friday."
Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Informative)
Incidentally, NASA reserved the write to call it whatever they want; they don't have to go with the vote.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Funny)
Xenu is the galactic overlord from Scientology myth
Xenu is NOT a myth! I take it you are not a Scientologist.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Funny)
Your right, it's SyFy!
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Funny)
$DEITY help us all.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:4, Funny)
What about people who believe in @DEITIES, you insensitive clod?!
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Welcome my new sarcastic, wise-cracking overlord?
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Scientology == Sham Poo
Please don't sue me...
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:4, Informative)
That's too bad..
My information may be out of date, but at one time Scientologists were told they needed to have scientology-approved censorware on their computers, and one of the things that the banned words was "xenu" (apparently to protect the scientologists from encountering a website that would kill them.)
It would have been hilarious if ever website that contained a reference to the space station would have been blocked.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:4, Informative)
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
10 years have passed, and Scientology is still an evil, ruthless, desperate, ineffective, incompetent. laughing stock of a cult.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
aren't they making oodles of money, which is what counts ... to them ?
So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Funny)
I wonder if he'd let it be named Serenity for a date with Inara Serra / Morena Baccarin?
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Insightful)
Apparently you've never been married.
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Insightful)
Why do these "marriage is so harsh" sort of jokes always get moderated as "insightful" rather than "funny" (or "overrated")? Sad.
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Funny and insightful are not mutually exclusive. Clearly those mods were awarded by someone who found resonance with the truth illucidated therein. Even if they don't outright want to mess around, certainly it now strikes them as incredibly naive that someone would think a married father unlikely to see a whore or cheat.
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Insightful)
Why do these "marriage is so harsh" sort of jokes always get moderated as "insightful"...
Apparently you've never been married.
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:4, Funny)
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Interesting)
Why do these "marriage is so harsh" sort of jokes always get moderated as "insightful
The moderators are married. Marriage is OK, but there are two big points:
Just get a written agreement on everything before you marry. Work, kids education, number of kids, money, ... Including minimum frequency of sex. It may seem awkard, but it is so much easier that way.
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:4, Interesting)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Apparently you are not a married father. ;)
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Funny)
Oh c'mon, dude!
She's not a random actress, she's a Companion.
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Oh c'mon, dude!
She's not a random actress, she's a Companion.
Oh, the companion... I thought it was the engine girl... hahaha
Just goes to show you that the sexes don't know what interests the other side....
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Insightful)
I like engine girl. :)
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:4, Insightful)
As an unmarried slashdotter, let me say:
My name is geminidomino, and I approve parent's message. Kaylee smokes Inara any day.
Re:So Colbert Nation greater than the Browncoats (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Informative)
Incidentally, NASA reserved the write to call it whatever they want; they don't have to go with the vote.
I suspect it's as likely to be named "Colbert" as Hank, the Angry, Drunken Dwarf is to become People's Most Beautiful Person.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Does anyone else secretly suspect Hank actually has the better odds?
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Insightful)
I don't see why they wouldn't name it "Colbert". I mean, yeah, it's a joke, but it's also good publicity, and what harm does it do?
I think if they don't, it's showing that the people running NASA are sticks in the mud and take themselves too seriously.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Insightful)
I don't see why they wouldn't name it "Colbert". I mean, yeah, it's a joke, but it's also good publicity, and what harm does it do?
I think if they don't, it's showing that the people running NASA are sticks in the mud and take themselves too seriously.
As someone else pointed out in a previous thread on this subject, serious organizations, especially ones with government connections, don't like to name things after people who are still alive.
You see, if you name it after a person who has lived out their life, you can evaluate their entire life and make sure that they haven't done anything that you wouldn't want to be associated with. However, someone who is still alive might very well do something in the future (kill someone in a drunk driving accident, get caught with child pornography, shoot their wife, etc) that no one wants to be associated with.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Informative)
As someone else pointed out in a previous thread on this subject, serious organizations, especially ones with government connections, don't like to name things after people who are still alive.
You see, if you name it after a person who has lived out their life, you can evaluate their entire life and make sure that they haven't done anything that you wouldn't want to be associated with. However, someone who is still alive might very well do something in the future (kill someone in a drunk driving accident, get caught with child pornography, shoot their wife, etc) that no one wants to be associated with.
Of course, not everybody follows that advice:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Stevens_Anchorage_International_Airport [wikipedia.org]
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Funny)
The airport to nowhere!
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:4, Funny)
shoot their wife, etc) that no one wants to be associated with.
The guy who named reiserfs should have thought of that
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Colbert is a common surname and rare given name of Old French and Old German origins; it was introduced to Britain by the Normans.[1]
Colbert most commonly refers to:
Jean-Baptiste Colbert (1619–1683), French minister of finance under King Louis XIV...
And that's the US version.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Interesting)
Naming it Xenu would have hurt Scientology, not helped it. Xenu is considered top secret by the Church of Scientology and its lawyers, and they sue people who post the texts--they forced Slashdot to remove a comment for the first time in its history. People wondering what Xenu is would look it up and find out about OT III. It would have been a great blow to have that out there. Thanks to Colbert and his mindless viewers who do everything he says, that won't happen, and the opportunity is gone.
Consider me biased since I'm sick of Colbert's schtick, and I'm sick of his college kiddie fans who parrot everything he says and spam his videos to Digg.
Wouldn't have mattered (Score:3, Insightful)
The Xenu ship has sailed. Everyone knows what it is now. For instance Colbert mentions it on his show all the time, and his nightly audience is bigger than the total number of votes in this NASA content.
The vote had nothing to with harming Scientology--naming it Xenu was just a nerd joke, just like Battletoad or Stephen Colbert or Serenity.
Re:Scientology and Scientologists... (Score:5, Funny)
...are the people behind nearly all that is evil in the world!
Ah come on not all evil, leave some room for bankers and republicans!
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
...are all a bunch of child molestors and rapists (in my opinion). It is my belief, that Scientologists have gay sex with children on a daily basis and are the people behind nearly all that is evil in the world!
As a Jew, I take offense to the notion that anyone can supplant my people as the #1 target of paranoid conspiracy theories! Even the Time Cube guy targets us, and I won't let you ruin that.
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All scams and/or religions started with but a few people believing them.
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Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Insightful)
I think it's important to remember all of the popular, positive attention Stephen Colbert has given to NASA over the years and science in general. He well deserves the name if for nothing else than for the great PR he brings NASA.
Did you even know there was an addition to the space station before it was on The Colbert Report? I didn't.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Only if you remove the attached Thetans first, though, right?
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Funny)
Of course, you can't run Linux on a toaster until you remove the Thetans.
Racist comment (Score:5, Funny)
I believe the correct term is actually "damaged Cylon" you insensitive frakin' clod.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Funny)
I've got a broken toaster that I'd rather consult for spiritual advice.
I don't know, toasters can be pretty annoying [youtube.com]. But you're probably right.
Re:Colbert trumps Scientology; everyone wins. (Score:5, Interesting)
You make it sound as if this is a victory over scientology.
On the contrary, as I understand it, Xenu is more akin to Scientology's satan, than their god -- not a name they'd be trying to promote themselves. The effort to vote for Xenu was almost certainly an action of anti-Scientology protesters -- "Anonymous" being a likely culprit, what with their recent activity and affinity for online stunts like this. (of course, any depiction of "Anonymous" as a cohesive group with any sort of organization or leadership is misleading -- Anonymous is more of a flash mob)
The WP article on Xenu [wikipedia.org] seems to support this theory:
I'm shocked... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:I'm shocked... (Score:5, Funny)
that my write in vote for Bigus Dickus didn't win...
What's so funny about Biggus Dickus? I have a vewy gweat fwiend named Biggus Dickus.
Re: (Score:2)
...vewy gweat fwiend in Wome...
Sorry, OCD acting up.
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Let me come with you Pontiuth! I may be of thome athithtanth thould a thudden crithith arithe!
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
He's one of the highest wanking men in all of Wome.
Slight Exageration (Score:3, Informative)
Not all bad (Score:4, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
What will the full name be? (Score:5, Funny)
Pronounced, of course... (Score:5, Funny)
Kohl-bear Spayss-pore
Not so fast... (Score:3, Informative)
Re: (Score:2)
And I hope they will.
I was sort of hoping the Myyearbook guys would carry the vote, because then the case would have been even clearer: There is no way they'd have used such a ridiculous name. With Colbert, I'm less sure but I can still hope.
I concur with the summary: They should have never allowed write-ins.
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
I'm sure Joss Whedon fans may have had something to do with it, but naming Node 3 'Serenity' after Node 1 was named 'Unity' and Node 2 was named 'Harmony' doesn't seem that odd.
Re:Not so fast... (Score:4, Insightful)
Honorable Way Out for NASA (Score:5, Insightful)
Name it something else, but hang a signed picture of Colbert in the module. The fans are satisfied, a reasonable name can be applied, and Colbert gets a talking point for a show.
But please, for the love of God, no dancing! Colbert dancing with that freaky grin always creeps me out.
Re:Honorable Way Out for NASA (Score:5, Insightful)
Why would they need a way out? NASA had the chance to honor a scientist or engineer, but decided not to--Serenity doesn't honor anything but entertainment, and neither does Colbert, or Tek Jansen for that matter.
Re:Honorable Way Out for NASA (Score:5, Informative)
Re:Honorable Way Out for NASA (Score:5, Funny)
They'll just affix it somehow with some massive brass balls.
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Re: (Score:2)
Not such a bad idea. Get Microsoft to put up some big bucks for it.
Just as long as it doesn't crash....
Better than naming it after James Watt (Score:3, Funny)
NASA mission w. asian-american"
Where's Hiu? ... you trained with that crazy Depends-toting Lisa Maire Nowak [thesmokinggun.com]?
Watt!
What?
Yes.
No, I asked, where's Hiu?
Watt!
What?
Exactly!
Where?
Watt!
What?
Now you've got it!
Just tell me what's with Hiu
No, you've got it backwards.
Who?
That's what I said.
Where?
Watt!
What?
I'm glad we cleared that up.
Let me guess
My write in (Score:5, Funny)
Re:My write in (Score:5, Funny)
I wish I had mod points. Best post I've seen in a long time. Candlejack! That's just bril
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
What's with this "Candlejack" meme anyway? Every t
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Can you losers quit this "Candlejack" bullsh
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
I had to look up that attempt at a meme... I should have guessed it is from 4chan/b/ since it isn't funny, and has no intellectual appeal for anyone above perhaps fourteen.
I miss the days when /. had its own lame memes, and didn't have to import them from a bunch of adolescents. At least then the memes were fitting of the medium, meaning somewhat dorky.
Sorry for the nasty post, I just don't get the humor.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
I miss the days when /. had its own lame memes, and didn't have to import them from a bunch of adolescents.
Well I, for one, welcome our new 4chan... I can't go through with this, sorry.
OK, there's still a chance to vindicate myself here, how about this one:
In the new ISS Name Contest, where was the CowboyNeal option?
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
I am tired of this God Damned Shit.
4chan did not create the Candlejack meme. It existed long before 4chan did. Years before I ever saw a 'funny picture' of Candlejack on the internet, my friends and I made the Candlejack joke all the damn time.
See, once upon a time, there was a show called Freakazoid!. It was funny as hell, but its target audience (children) didn't quite understand the humour.
However, some of us still have fond memories of the show, as it's one of those rare gems that gets funnier as you
Moot / 4chan (Score:5, Insightful)
On a similar note, what will Time do if Moot wins the #1 most influential person of the year?
http://www.time.com/time/specials/packages/article/0,28804,1883644_1886141,00.html [time.com]
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
The year in which an historical american president takes office, the year the world's economy went bust due to the head honchos at AIG, and moot wins? This is perspective?
Too bad slashdot... (Score:2)
Didn't enter the contest.
don't trust to hope (Score:2)
Before you get too excited, note that "Colbert" won the online poll.
Which is a completely different thing than actually getting the space station module named after him.
Re:don't trust to hope (Score:4, Insightful)
Why shouldn't it be named after him? After all, it makes sense. Bear in mind that there's a lot of people watch the Colbert Report who are not necessarily Space Nerds. But they are people who have political interests, and are active voters. Do you not think it would actually be a really really good thing to have them interested in what NASA is doing? And thus help fund other things?
Colbert is great about generating publicity, the Colbert Bump is real -- so why not bump NASA? Who really cares what the craft is called if it will help NASA?
Allow me to be the first to say... (Score:2)
... Hahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahaha!!!!!
Re: (Score:2)
Your intelligence overwhelms me.
Better than naming it for an incontinence pad! (Score:2)
Actually, NASA lucked out.
What with the problems with the urine recycling system, naming the new lab after an incontinence pad could, if it ever leaked to the press, dampen public enthusiasm and, uh, tick people off.
Would have been "Ron Paul" (Score:4, Funny)
It would have been "Ron Paul" if it wasn't a socialist space project!
Should have been called... (Score:2)
Mistake? (Score:5, Insightful)
NASA's mistake was allowing write-ins.
Mistake? How so? It's pretty obvious that the purpose of the naming-competition was to get people involved and excited. To raise NASA's profile and garner some free advertising. By allowing write-ins, they opened the door for Colbert to advertise for them. And apparently he drove some 230,000 people to go check out the NASA site, maybe read some other NASA material, talk about NASA with their friends, and so on.
I daresay NASA was quite successful in their effort to gain some publicity. Allowing write-ins was evidently not a mistake.
Yes, a Mistake (Score:3, Interesting)
Mistake? How so? It's pretty obvious that the purpose of the naming-competition was to get people involved and excited.
Howard Stern could get legions of his fans excited about the project too. I still wouldn't want a station module named after him.
Re:Yes, a Mistake (Score:4, Insightful)
Charlene (Score:3, Funny)
Colbert's gonna have to redo his song/DLC for Rockband "Charlene (I'm right behind you)" to add in "...I think of you when I'm watchin' you from the ISS far above you..."
Poll was weighted to begin with (Score:3, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
maybe the astronauts will cut off the beginning and just call it the Bert module
The next module has to be "Ernie".
Coal bear, except for the WGA strike (Score:5, Informative)
This is awful. I've heard him pronounce his *own* name different ways on his show.
As I understand it, The Colbert Report is "the coal bear rapport" most of the time, but it was temporarily changed to "the coal bert report" during the first quarter of 2008 [wikipedia.org] to signify the more improvisational format that the striking Writers Guild of America forced on Colbert. Likewise, The Daily Show got replaced with A Daily Show [wikipedia.org].
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
He also often pronounces the T when talking to himself, like "get a grip, Colbert"
Re:Uncritical media breaks democracy (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:NASA won (Score:5, Insightful)
Yeah! What the fuck have we ever gotten from NASA? Pretty pictures?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NASA_Spinoff [wikipedia.org]
http://spaceplace.nasa.gov/en/kids/spinoffs2.shtml [nasa.gov]
Re:NASA won (Score:5, Interesting)
All right, but apart from the Pretty Pictures, Light-Emitting Diodes, Infrared Ear Thermometers, DeBakey's Ventricular Assist Device, Artificial Limbs, Aircraft Anti-Icing Systems, Highway Safety Grooving, Improved Radial Tires, Chemical Detection, Video Enhancing and Analysis Systems, Land Mine Removal, Fire-Resistant Reinforcement, Firefighting Equipment, Temper Foam, Enriched Baby Food, Portable Cordless Vacuums, Freeze Drying Technology, Water Purification, Solar Energy, Pollution Remediation, Better Virtual Software, Structural Analysis, Internet-Connected Ovens, Powdered Lubricants, Improved Mine Safety and Food Safety Systems, what have we ever gotten from NASA?
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Sometimes the direct route is not always the best route. The river meanders for a reason.
Re:News from 2015 (Score:4, Informative)
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
I say we get an early start and begin naming our spacecraft and space stations in the fashion of Iain M. Bank's Culture [wikipedia.org]. Gravitas? We don't need no stinking gravitas.
Re:Colbert wee wees on space program supporters (Score:5, Insightful)
That's one way to look at it.
On the other hand, I think it's an example of how quickly a large group of people can be mobilized when prompted by someone they like. It seems obvious you've not spent much time watching his program.
Colbert, Stewart, and others prove that serious discussion can happen while laughing. I don't think for one second that Stephen was mocking NASA; he actually saved it from the prior leading write-in: Xenu.