Illinois Declares Pluto a Planet 512
The Bad Astronomer writes "The legislators in Illinois, always on the lookout for more places to find voters, have passed a resolution declaring Pluto is a planet. I'm not sure what else can be said here, except that — besides overstepping their jurisdiction just a wee bit — they make a couple of scientific howlers in the resolution itself."
Pff this is ridiculous (Score:5, Funny)
Everybody knows Pluto is a dog.
This just in (Score:5, Funny)
Slashdot declares Illinois retarded
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:5, Funny)
I declare Illinois (Score:5, Funny)
and I declare Illinois a corn field.
Re:Yo mama is so fat... (Score:5, Funny)
Yo mama is so fat...Illinois declared her a planet
Yo mama is so ugly, astronomers who look at her think they're looking at Jupiter's moon IO
Yo mama is so old, her boyfriends CARBON-date her
Yo mama is so old and fat, her stomach is actually fusing helium with neon to produce magnesium just before she turns into a neutron star!
Yo mama is so ugly, that when computer scientists look at her, they are immediately reminded of Edsger Dijkstra's letter "Go To Statement Considered Harmful" because they don't want to "Go To" her.
Ok, that last one got me severely beaten up on the playground when I was a kid, but the rest are funny and hardly trollish.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Attention, people of Illinois (Score:4, Funny)
we have duly noted your recent reconsideration of Pluto and its classification. We appreciate this sign of good-will and will take it into account in our upcoming invasion of Earth.
Although I can make no promises at this point, I am able to inform you that sparing your lives is currently viewed favourably amongst our population.
Yours sincerely,
Gral Rex,
Minister of Earth Affairs, Government of Pluto
p.s. to the rest of mankind: You are all still toast.
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:2, Funny)
So, there's a dog in orbit out past Neptune? Is that what they mean by the Dog Star, what with Pluto being so famous?
Just Wondering (Score:3, Funny)
Being a planet is a valuable thing. So, how much did it cost Pluto?
Re:Politicians wonder... (Score:3, Funny)
If Illinois Says it's a Planet, It's a Planet (Score:5, Funny)
Don't argue. There's already three astronomers at the bottom of Lake Michigan who "begged to differ."
It's the Chicago way.
Re:Yo mama is so fat... (Score:3, Funny)
Thank you for turning emotionally scarring events in your life into /. humor. We can hardly wait to see what you will post when the topic is sex. ;)
Re:Too right! (Score:3, Funny)
There are 8 planets in the universe right now, does that make you happy?
In the UNIVERSE? Might as well say the Earth is flat.
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:5, Funny)
Consider the work they do and how much they manage to get paid for it. My definition of idiot doesn't quite capture that. "Idiot savant" comes closer.
Re:There is a good reason for this ... (Score:5, Funny)
There's an easy solution to that, just use 100 year old science texts, Pluto won't be in them at all.
Re:Before people say that Illinois is stupid (Score:2, Funny)
Gah, foiled again by the bearded lady.
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:3, Funny)
This just proves that fact that politicians are freaking idiots.
You needed further proof?
I take exception to the fucking summary though. "Always on the lookout for more votes" sounds funny but fails to take note of the fact that in Illinois only the dead vote. Is Pluto covered with graveyards that we don't know about or something?
Re:Yo mama is so fat... (Score:5, Funny)
You used Edsger Dijkstra references as a kid? I don't think it was the "Yo mama" insults that got you beat up on the playground!
Re:Have you been there? (Score:3, Funny)
Yeah, but some might say you get what you've been given, if you don't get yours I won't get mine as well. Doesn't make it so. My sink isn't full of fishes for a start.
Tomorrow's Headline... (Score:5, Funny)
And to think... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Politicians wonder... (Score:1, Funny)
What they do in their own time should be their own business.
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:5, Funny)
Way to expose your ignorance.
Pluto is the fucking king of the underworld!
If you want to vote the dead, he's the guy to see.
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Too right! (Score:5, Funny)
Yeah. I vote that Illinois also changes the definition of a mile and shortens it so that their residents can get more miles to the gallon! I also vote that they cut the definition of an hour down to 30mins to shorten my working day.
LOL. Next time it'll be a someone saying a gigabtye is 1,000,000,000 bytes!
oblig spaceballs (Score:3, Funny)
We were lost, none of us knew where we were. Then Harry starts 'feeling around on all the trees' and he says... "I got it we on Pluto", I say, 'Harry how can ya tell", and he says, "from the bark, you dummies... Ha-ha! From the bark!"
Re:If Illinois Says it's a Planet, It's a Planet (Score:2, Funny)
The Chicago Way is for Plutonians to "donate" to a legislature's campaign fund.
Re:Tomorrow's Headline... (Score:3, Funny)
So Roland Burris is the Pluto of senators?
This just in (Score:3, Funny)
Illinois redefines "retarded" to mean "most smartiest place in the world."
Re:Too right! (Score:3, Funny)
a gigabtye might be, I don't know what that is.
Re:If Illinois Says it's a Planet, It's a Planet (Score:5, Funny)
No, it's plutocrats that donate.
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:3, Funny)
Imagine poor Scientist (RIP) when he finds out there was indeed a underworld, Pluto is really its king and he owns Pluto.
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:3, Funny)
This just proves that fact that politicians are freaking idiots.
You needed further proof?
I take exception to the fucking summary though. "Always on the lookout for more votes" sounds funny but fails to take note of the fact that in Illinois only the dead vote. Is Pluto covered with graveyards that we don't know about or something?
Actually, Pluto is renowned for its penguin colonies [wikipedia.org].
Re:Politicians wonder... (Score:2, Funny)
Frankly, the more time they spend doing silly crap like this, the less time the spend screwing something important up. It's too bad it wastes tax dollars to do it, though...
Would you rather that they go after hookers on craigslist?
I believe that would qualify as "screwing something important up."
Re:Yo mama is so fat... (Score:3, Funny)
"Yo mama is so ugly, astronomers who look at her think they're looking at Uranus."
Sorry, I had to.
Comment removed (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:5, Funny)
I suspect that in Illinois, no one can hear you scream!
Hey - that'd be awesome on a T-shirt!
Re:Too right! (Score:4, Funny)
My penis IS a mile long, you insensit-
......Sorry, got a bit excited and blacked out there for a while ......
-ive clod!
Re:If Illinois Says it's a Planet, It's a Planet (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Pff this is ridiculous (Score:5, Funny)
In further news, the State of Illinois passes a law regulating the value of pi to exactly 3.000.