A Countdown To Global Catastrophe?

An anonymous reader writes "From The Independent: The global warming danger threshold for the world is clearly marked for the first time in an international report to be published tomorrow - and the bad news is, the world has nearly reached it already. For the full story, see this article."

Venkman said it best:

[AtariAmarok]

Venkman: This city is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions. Mayor: What do you mean, biblical?
Ray: What he means is Old Testament, Mr. Mayor... real Wrath-of-God-type stuff. Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies.
Venkman: Rivers and seas boiling!
Egon: 40 years of darkness, earthquakes, volcanos. Winston:The dead rising from the grave!
Venkman: Human sacrifice, dogs and cats, living together... mass hysteria!

Is it time to

[Enigma_Man]

start the looting yet?

-Jesse

Since we've already reached the threshold...

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm buying a Hummer!

(The SUV, you pervs)

Re:Venkman said it best:

[WickWickWack]

Can't wait for the free marshmallow...

nota bad thing

[millahtime]

I live in Michigan, US. I want global warming about now. It's about 0 degrees here. The sensor in my tire froze and broke now saying my car has low air pressure in the tires. I step out side and feel my noze hair freeze. BRING ON THE GLOBAL WAMING!!!!!! I need to thaw out.

Re:Is it time to start looting?

[Anonymous Coward]

"For the full store, see this article."

Apparently so.

Re:Original Study?

[TopShelf]

Does anyone have a link to the actual report?

Just search scholar.google.com for Dr. Chick N. Little...

Re:Since we've already reached the threshold...

[leon.gandalf]

Then that would be GETTING a HUMMER....

Re:Original Study?

[tcopeland]

> Dr. Chick N. Little

He's being sued by my law firm - Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe.

winston zeddemore

[millahtime]

Winston:.... since I've been with these guys I've seen $h1t that'll turn you white.

Re:Original Study?

[Anonymous Coward]

SCO has a supervolcano???

Linux most get a bigger super duper volcano, we can not have a supervolcano gap!!!

Re:Since we've already reached the threshold...

[Anonymous Coward]

Perhaps a boat would be more appropriate.

I for one welcome change.

[Lifereaper0]

I think we need a good end of the world situation. I look forward to leading hordes of bad people in the search for pleasure. I plan on wearing a cool mask and driving a highly tuned car o' death while screaming "Give Me Your Oil!!"...but that's just me.

Re:Original Study?

[Ctrl-Z]

Does anyone have a link to the actual report?

From the summary: The global warming danger threshold for the world is clearly marked for the first time in an international report to be published tomorrow ...

A Nod To Douglas Adams.....

[BRock97]

And it breaks new ground by putting a figure - for the first time in such a high-level document - on the danger point of global warming...

And that figure is.... 42.

Re:WND has an interesting take on this

[brainstyle]

From the link:

'Global warming' hype reaches fever pitch But critics doubting data compare ideology behind movement to Communism, Nazism

Man, they don't get past the sub-header before invoking Godwin's law. Now that's good journalism!

Re:winston zeddemore

[Anonymous Coward]

Winston:.... since I've been with these guys I've seen $h1t that'll turn you white

GNAA surrenders!

Re:Original Study?

[gspr]

That may be true, and even though the general state of the Earth should be highly prioritized, nothing (and I mean NOTHING) can ultimately compare to the question of Human survival.
The Earth is truly nothing without us.

Re:nota bad thing

[Anonymous Coward]

Dale: "If we take control of this global warming thing we can grow pineapples in Alaska!"

Hank: "We don't live in Alaska, we live in Texas where it gets 112 degrees in the shade. And if it gets one degree hotter I'm gonna kick your ass!"

Re:Original Study?

[ggvaidya]

We might not be around later, but good ol' Earth sure will be.

Yeah, sorry about that, the fleet's a little delayed. But we'll get to it eventually.

Cheers,
Prosthetic Vogon Jeltz

Life imitates art...

[Anonymous Coward]

"The risk of nuclear war, during the cold war, was not a certainty..."

Fry: "This snow is beautiful! I'm glad global warming never happened."
Leela: "Actually, it did. But thank God nuclear winter canceled it out."

Luckily ...

[crmartin]

the world ended in the 1100s and the 1500s when the temperatures were that high before, so this is just academic.

If we all get together and act quickly

[Junior J. Junior III]

If we all get together and act quickly, we can still reverse this. Just stick your air conditioner in your window the other way around, and turn it on full blast. If every AC unit in the USA is turned on reverse full-blast like this, we should be OK.

Re:Original Study?

[Stevis]

We need to make sure Earth is still here for when the Galactica arrives....

Re:Already Flipped

[Enzo the Baker]

Ironically the article pointed out that there were no cars at that time.

Well, apparently National Geographic hasn't heard of a little place called Atlantis. They had cars. Flying ones. And what happened to them? They got flooded. Hmmmm... sounds like global warming to me. And who told us about them? Oh yeah, that's right. The Egyptians.

Re:Big Deal..

[Ingolfke]

I want my great great grandson to live too... and I want him to rule over the remnants of mankind with an iron fist and will of steel. The coming environmental disaster will be the beginning of our dynasty... or maybe the robots will take over.

Re:Already Flipped

[Ingolfke]

Dear sir or madam,

In the future, when posting to Slashdot, please never cite another source and talk about their "opinions". Only refer to their views as fact, dogma, the unequivocal truth. This way others will respond with their facts and we'll start a flame war. By honestly presenting an opinion, others may take a moment and reflect on what you have to say, and may even choose to better themselves. We don't want that now do we? I didn't think so.

Regards,
The Management

Re:Original Study?

[Anonymous Coward]

you will know about it again on slashdot the day after tomorrow

Don't believe the report

[Anonymous Coward]

It was written by a group of Tree Hugging-Pinko-Liberal-Commie-Heathen-Tourists groups that had ties to Saddam and has ties to Bin Laden and once found, they will be arrested under the USA Patriot Act because these groups may have weapons of mass production to use to push their tree huging agenda.

Sincerely,

George W Bush
President of Hali^h^h^h^hthe United States of America

Dick Cheney
Vice President of Hali^h^h^h^hthe United States of America

Re:Original Study?

[iwan-nl]

[...] but not *not* an eco-nut

So you're saying you are an eco-nut? This is confusing.

Re:Key point: it's not the planet, it's us

[cayenne8]

"Let's say that Pakistan and India go to war, and it escalates to nuclear war. Each side is estimated to have roughly 70 small fission weapons. Even if all of these weapons were assembled, delivered and detonated, the global environmental effects would be minimal. A substantial number of Indians and Pakistanis would be killed or injured, and the political and economic consequences would probably be severe for the region..."

Hmm...well, it would certainly slow the outsourcing of jobs to India, that's for sure...

:-)

Re:Key point: it's not the planet, it's us

[MrZaius]

How much do we commit?

We commit whatever it takes to build and stock 15 Vaults in SoCal, that, when the time is right, the Vault Dweller can rise and make things right in the world.

PS: Always stock extra water chips.

Re:Global Warming Science = Creationist Science

[Anonymous Coward]

I know what you mean. The National Academy of Sciences are just a bunch of lazy/bad scientists. Ditto for the community of Nobel Prize winners. Now W., there's a scientist.

Re:Key point: it's not the planet, it's us

[Anonymous Coward]

Go easy on the Trekkies, earth women won't sleep with them so they're hoping somewhere, somehow, there's some alien pussy they can get.

Repent - The end of the world is nigh

[Anonymous Coward]

Any more commenting on this crap would be a waste of electrons.

Re:Since we've already reached the threshold...

[nihilistcanada]

It depends on the type of van you have. Single guys with white windowless vans get laid all the time. But then they tend go to jail for 20 years and have to let the police know where they are at all times after they get out.

Re:Venkman said it best:

[rcamans]

TV? What's that? Are you seriously asking me to take time away from this video game to watch some dumb old rerun movie?
You have got to be kidding.
No, really you guys need to get a life. I mean video game. I mean, oh whatever

Re:Turn off your computers/monitors when not in us

[ectoraige]

Heh, my laptop appears to have a sense of humour. About 5 seconds after posting parent, it complained about low battery power.