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Humans in America 25,000 Years Ago? 576

Ephboy writes "A researcher in South Carolina has found stones that appear to be man-made stone tools that date from 25,000 years ago, about twice as old as the best documented evidence of human settlement in North America."
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Humans in America 25,000 Years Ago?

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  • by Hot Summer Nights ( 771962 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:01AM (#10851502)
    Why is there no intelligent life in America today?
    • There is.. go to your local Casino. They are called Tribes. They are independant nations inside the US numbering in the thousands.. they were nice systems that were too nice, and were thusly erraticated due to brilliant warfare waged by early US. (see first biological warfare- also: pox ridden blankets)

      oh.. and I'm Chippewa, BTW.. card carrying, voting, and casino owning.
      • "(see first biological warfare- also: pox ridden blankets)" No. At least as early as the middle ages people used to load dead, disease ridden bodies into catapults and hurl them into catles they were seiging.
      • Yah, and I'm still pissed at the Romans for enslaving my ancestors and feeding them to lions. Get over it buddy, the issue is buried and long dead. You're just another American just like me.
      • The US wasn't the first to use disease infected blankets. Credit for that goes to the British.
        BBC link [bbc.co.uk]
      • by kfg ( 145172 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @08:59AM (#10852981)
        Most of the Eastern tribes were nearly eradicated by European diseases before the arrival of the "Pilgrims."

        Before departing England the Pilgrims actually offered thanks to God for the devistating plauge that had depopulated the New World, leaving it open for them.

        Before departing England Squanto (yes, Squanto came from England to meet the Pilgrims, and spoke with them in perfect English) had intended to rejoin his native people, but upon his arrival found that they had been wiped out by disease, hence his hooking up with the Pilgrims in a sort of mutual survial pact in the first place.

        I'm afraid that the US can't really take credit for any brilliance in military strategy here. It was mostly an accident and the later intentional germ warfare conducted against native tribes was informed by previous unintentional example.

        For the most part you out strategied us every step of the way (except, perhaps, for being too nice) and we simply used a very crude, but very effective, method to deal with those of you that remained after the various plagues.

        We swept over you like a flood.

        The story isn't entirely unique I'm afraid. The Tartars did the same thing to my Causcasian ancestors, so thouroughly that the very word used to describe an endentured state is my people's name.

        KFG
      • by Mattcelt ( 454751 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @09:51AM (#10853512)
        I don't mean to be inflammatory - I'm part Native American myself - but AFAIK it wasn't the Europeans who invented scalping. Many (though certainly not all) of the Native American tribes were ruthless warriors who did all they could to eradicate each other. War was not unknown to this people; I hesitate to agree that it was their 'niceness' that failed them.

        That's not to say that the Europeans (and later the U.S.) did not do some atrocious things. Some of what was done was unforgiveable. Thank goodness we as a society have come a long way since then.

        • Boy are you wrong (Score:3, Informative)

          by heybo ( 667563 )

          Scalping WAS a bounty hunter thing. You see it started with you got $10.00 for every "Red Skin" (thus the term Red Skin) of a male you brought in and $5.00 for every female or child "Red Skin" you brought in. When these piles of skins started to stink and were also to hard to carry around and trade. They reduced it to scalps. so scalping started.

          Point of intrest.... Isn't it great that our Nations Capital's football's team is named after this. see the Indian wars still do exist.

          Yes we can be "savag

      • by b-baggins ( 610215 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @10:15AM (#10853808) Journal
        Anyone who thinks the American Indians were a universally "nice" people living in some sort of "one with nature" utopia needs to lay off the kool-aid.

        They were and are humans just like everyone else and suffered from the same vices, power struggles, warfare and savagery as every other example of humanity throughout history.
  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:01AM (#10851504)
    Ahh yes, South Carolina. I remember it well. That's where I buried all those stone tools I bought at the open-air market in Lambeth.
  • did the submitter... (Score:5, Informative)

    by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:02AM (#10851505)
    did the submitter RTFA? It clear states that the stones date from 50,000 years ago. 25,000 years earlier than previously thought.

    fp?
  • by Scorillo47 ( 752445 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:03AM (#10851516)
    Hmmm... which one of these currents can use this as a proof?
  • by plierhead ( 570797 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:03AM (#10851517) Journal
    Those are neolithic tools that were used for voting. Early Americans used them to punch out the chads on the stone tablets used in elections to select their leaders. Of course things have moved on somewhat since then...
    • by Lurker McLurker ( 730170 ) <(allthecoolnames ... (at) (gmail.com)> on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:10AM (#10851546)
      Stone tablets were often used in voting in ancient times. It's not generally known that the Ten Commandments were actually a voting slip, nad the Israelites were only supposed to pick one, not keep the lot.
    • by pchan- ( 118053 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:23AM (#10851604) Journal
      these early south-carolinians, homo-courouge as they were dubbed by researchers, exhibit some peculiar behaviour not found in other native tribes. several skulls have been found that seem to have an imprint of a cylinder which was crushed on their foreheads. archeologists have also found early versions of spear-racks, presumably for mules or horses, large rusty ornamental iron works (perhaps religious icons) which were stored on blocks in front of their dwellings, as well as cave painting of an early strom thurmand election poster. we may never know how they lived, but their remains leave us with fascinating clues into the ways of a civilization now gone forever.
  • by WegianWarrior ( 649800 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:04AM (#10851520) Journal

    ...that the loudest arguments will not be over how old these remains are, but there they came from, and if they are indian (native american) or not in origin...

    • Depends on who you talk to. For creationists the world was created just a few thousand years ago. They will be arguing that these stones are less then ten thousand year old.

      • Yah, I think the same thing whenever a new space probe is launched and the geocentrists [wikipedia.org] get all uppity and claim it'll crash into the the crystal spheres.
    • I did hear some interesting theories, apparently based on DNA studies of indigenous people on islands of the cost of South America and some archeological finds, that the first peoples to settle in the americas were not the people now know as native amaericans.

      They were nergoid rather then mogoloid, and thought to have come across the sea rather than the land bridge. The theory went that the Native American's ancestors had gone south and driven out and killed the first wave on inhabitants, a few of whom su

    • Actually, so far the debate centers on whether these are actually stone tools as claimed or just naturally chipped stones.
  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:04AM (#10851522)
    If this is actually true, then it's really quite challenging to the accepted idea of how modern man spread throughout the earth. Twenty-five thousand years ago is quite close to when man is thought to have arrived in central Asia (from Africa).

    Either modern humans developed somewhat earlier than we thought, or else they spread over the earth in a flash, like some extremely virulent form of kudzu or something.
    • 25k years ago for man arriving in central asia can't be entirely right. The australian aboriginals have been around in this country for 40-60k years, and its theorized they came via an asian landbridge.. Unless of course the SE Asian humans were around before the Central asian.
      • by Raffaello ( 230287 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @08:52AM (#10852908)
        Spencer Wells' work on male genetic markers suggests that there were two routes out of Africa - one along the coast of south asia, the other through SW asia (a.k.a., the Midde East) and into Central Asia. The South asian coastal route led to Australia. It is perfectly possible that people first reached both places (Central Asia and Australia) at around the same time. They just moved first along the coastal route probably because they were not slowed by the need to create a whole new set of material adaptations as they went. Lving in Central Asia requires a completely different set of tools, clothing and skills than living in coastal Northeastern Africa (the point of departure). Living in coastal South Asia and Coastal NW Australia does not.

        Wells believes that the wave of migration leading to Australia began some 60,000 years ago. The wave leading to Central Asia dates to significantly later, probably 45,000 - 40,000 years ago.

        To bring this fully on topic, genetic evidence indicates that people could not have reached North America much earlier than 15,000 - 20,000 years ago, so I'm inclined to believe that the article's suggested 50,000 year date for a hearth is simply wrong. It is probably just a natural feature (remains of a naturally ocurring fire) and the purported "tools" are probably just naturally fractured rocks. You'd be amazed at the broken rocks that some archaeologists (I'm an archaeologist by training) will call "tools." Only microscopic wear pattern analysis of sample edges can begin to establish that some randomly fractured hunk of rock is really a tool. I didn't see any mention that this has been done in the article. Another possibility is stratigraphic mixing (different levels of the site have been disturbed or moved by the activities of burrowing animals).
        • To be a bit more accurate, whether there was a population in North America earlier than 15-20,000 years ago, there is no genetic markers to support it.

          Saying that there were no people in North America before this, is akin to claiming a mathematical proof by absense of a counter example is valid. It isn't a proof, it is a lack of a counter example.

          Likewise there appear to be situations where there are genetic markers which do not match the 15-20,000 year window, and appear to be branches frome Europe, rath
    • If this is actually true, then it's really quite challenging to the accepted idea of how modern man spread throughout the earth.

      Although it's admittedly barely on the fringes of credible science, there is evidence of a global technologically-advanced culture a long time ago. Stuff like similar pyramids in Egypt and South America, golden Mayan sculptures that the Spanish thought were of birds but actually look more like jet aircraft, myths of Atlantis, a fused-glass "floor" found in a core sample taken in

    • Twenty-five thousand years ago is quite close to when man is thought to have arrived in central Asia (from Africa).

      Bzzzt. Wrong answer.

      First off, try reading the article. The slashdot blurb is so wrong it isn't even funny. The tools appear to be 25,000 years than the previous earliest known in the new world - which was NOT Clovis. These things are from about 50,000 years ago. Humans in the new world 25,000 years ago has been known for many years. The population just seems to have been tiny, prior to the

  • Old joke (Score:5, Funny)

    by SuneSpeg ( 662034 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:07AM (#10851529) Homepage
    Old joke, the ./ way:

    German scientists dug 50 meters down and discovered small pieces of copper.
    After studying these pieces for a long time, Germany announced that the ancient Germans 15,000 years ago had DSL.

    Naturally, the Russian government was not that easily impressed. They ordered their own scientists to dig even deeper.
    100 meters down they found small pieces of glass and they soon announced that the ancient Russians 20,000 years ago already had a nation-wide fiber net.

    American scientists were outraged by this. They dug 200 meters down & found absolutely nothing.
    They happily concluded that the ancient Americans 25,000 years ago had wireless network.
  • Uh-oh (Score:4, Funny)

    by SbooX ( 181758 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:14AM (#10851561)
    Anyone else suspicious about anything regarding evolution that comes out of South Carolina?
  • ok, so (Score:2, Insightful)

    a proto-native american man picks up a nice looking stone in asia, on his way across the land bridge. when he dies, his son takes it as he migrates south. over the years it ends up in the location it was found.

    there mystery solved.
    • He picks up a stone tool that is already 25,000 years old, which he finds on top of the ground, lying at his feet. Yeah, that's bloody convincing. I'm always having to kick those damned ancient artifacts out of my way when I mow my lawn.
    • Re:ok, so (Score:2, Funny)

      by sidesh0w ( 32371 )
      SOLDIER #1:
      Are you suggesting stone tools migrate?
      ARTHUR:
      Not at all. They could be carried.
      SOLDIER #1:
      What? A swallow carrying a chisel?
      ARTHUR:
      It could grip it by the handle!
      SOLDIER #1:
      It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound stone tool.
      ARTHUR:
      Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here?
      SOLDIER #1:
      Listen. In order to maintain a
      • Of course, we're talking about African swallows here because everyone know they have the highest air speed velocity.


        It is predicted that humans were throwing these so called tools at some swallows down in the Rift Valley when ....



  • by RyuuzakiTetsuya ( 195424 ) <taiki@co x . net> on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:16AM (#10851575)
    I know it's obviously going to modded down as flame bait, but my first response to this was, "What's the mormon response going to be?"

    Being here THOUSANDS of years before they claim the nephites showed up, that's gotta hurt the ol' church.
    • Re: Mormon twist? (Score:4, Insightful)

      by Black Parrot ( 19622 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:37AM (#10851648)


      > Being here THOUSANDS of years before they claim the nephites showed up, that's gotta hurt the ol' church.

      Since when have contrary facts hurt religions?

    • Re:Mormon twist? (Score:4, Insightful)

      by Buzh ( 74397 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:44AM (#10851674) Homepage
      Many of the monotheistic sects like mormons, jehovas witnesses and others of the evangelical (in the menaing of "interpreting the bible literally") persuasion claim that the earth is only a few thousand years old and "prove" this by tracing the genealogy of the bible from a person that can be more or less accurately placed on the timeline and all the way to Adam&Eve. 6000 years is a number that keeps turning up.

      Discoveries like this and others facts that disprove their theories are not going to change their views, as they claim that god created the world at $time with everything, including fossils, geological features and other dateable items intact.

      I can however assure you that they are NOT correct, as I know that the giant creator-wombat created the world out of a can of spam and some duct tape, with people, rocks, birds, the thoughts in your head, absolutely everything intact only 5 minutes ago. Go on, try to disprove it.
      • My question for the creationists is: How long was god's first day?? He didn't create the sun until day 4. Even then, there was no need for a day to be 24 hours long.

        For all we know, day 1 could have been 4 billion human years.

        • He could even have paused the Universe Simulator 3.2 and spent some "time" (whatever that is) tweaking a few parameters. Not that I'm saying he did that or anything similar.

          Those who believe they can take the Bible 100% literally are _sheep_ just as literally. There are some advantages to being as dumb as sheep, still it would be for the best if they kept quiet and stuck to following their Shepherd.
      • I can however assure you that they are NOT correct, as I know that the giant creator-wombat created the world out of a can of spam and some duct tape, with people, rocks, birds, the thoughts in your head, absolutely everything intact only 5 minutes ago. Go on, try to disprove it.

        Well, in fact the world won't be created until next year, and what we experience here is a mere computer simulation of ourselves and our future "past" as we are about to enter "recorded" history in preparation for that major even

    • Re:Mormon twist? (Score:2, Informative)

      by tehdaemon ( 753808 )
      You obviously don't know much about mormon theology then. According to the Book of Mormon (the book about, and written by the Nephites) a group of people came to the americas direct from the tower of babel, and destroyed themselves between 600 and 200 BC. (Nephites arrived a little after 600 BC)

      And Secondly, Mormon theology says that the garden on eden was actually in the americas too, and somewhere between Adam and the flood, (inclusive I guess) Noah ended up in the old world.

    • Re:Mormon twist? (Score:2, Informative)

      by suresk ( 816773 )
      Uhh, even the old date was too far back. IIRC, Mormon scriptures claim the Nephites came here around 2500 years ago, or so. Of course, this same book claims that the Nephites (Semitic people) were the principal ancestors of the Native Americans. This can clearly be seen by the abundance of Semitic DNA in Native Americans and the fact that they celebrate Chanukah. Oh wait. Nevermind.
    • Re:Mormon twist? (Score:3, Insightful)

      by darkstream ( 652288 )
      First of all, Mormons would hold out panicking about this until the scientists all agreed on the age of the artifacts (as the article shows that they don't agree). Then Mormons would argue that Adam and his people began here in the Americas anyway so this isn't much of a surprise. They would also point out that the Nephites weren't the first people to settle back in the Americas since the Jaredite civilization had wiped itself out just as the Nephites discovered them and that there is no reason to believe
  • by jd ( 1658 ) <imipakNO@SPAMyahoo.com> on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:19AM (#10851582) Homepage Journal
    Apparently, not everyone is convinced. Some geologists believe the stones to be naturally weathered and not artificially carved. (Did you seriously expect the scientific community to agree on anything?)


    More data is needed, no matter who is right. I do believe American civilization is a lot older than the previously-accepted figure, but 25,000 years means people discovered America about the same time they discovered northern Europe. Assuming that date is accurate, and there are some good reasons for questioning that, too.


    Part of the problem is that archaeology is seriously underfunded. Where I grew up, they are currently conducting an excavation of a large Iron Age settlement (4000+ inhabitants) with evidence it was first built 12,000 years ago. The site seems to have been the center of commerce for the whole of the North of Britain from the end of the Ice Age through to the Roman Occupation. That's one big, important site. Total funding: $44,000 a year, to cover site surveying equiptment, excavation equiptment, preservation efforts, education of the locals, pay for the full-time archaeologists on-site, paying the farmers whose fields are getting dug up...


    In South Carolina (where I lived for a while), things are a whole lot worse. The self-proclaimed "Holy City" of Charleston is definitely unlikely to fund work that contradicts the idea the world was created in 4004 BC. And that's one of the more liberal areas!


    Nor is South Carolina a place filled with philanthopists. Charleston, Mount Pleasent and West Ashley are all fighting bitterly over who gets to keep the Civil War submarine "The Hunley". None of them want to pay for it, they just want to have it.


    If they're not willing to pay for a serious conservation + museum for a part of history they are tightly intertwined with, they're certainly not going to pay some archaeologist to traipse across the countryside digging up fossil remains that largely serve to remind them that they are just a bunch of tourists in comparison to the settlers who were there first.

    • remind them that they are just a bunch of tourists in comparison to the settlers who were there first.

      I just wanted to emphasize the tourists part with a few Golgafrinchan comments about how us humans came to this planet ... But I don't carry my HHG2G bible (in an Orange cover to boot) around.

      Now since the God is in the White House [outlookindia.com] , anything that challenges Biblical Creationism might get the short stick ?. Sadly even education seems to teaching creationism rather than darwinism. I hate how these pe

  • by Capt'n Hector ( 650760 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:20AM (#10851584)
    In "Guns, Germs and Steel", Jarod Diamond details how the pacific rim was populated very early on in human history: every single island larger than a beached whale was touched by nomadic seafarers in fishing boats, they even got to Hawaii. So why exactly did we think the population of the new wold required the land bridge to be exposed between Siberia and Alaska? Did we think it too hard to island hop along the Aleutians? Apparently it wasn't... alternatively, as I recently saw on Nova, these first explorers came from France, the same people who painted the fameous Lascaux caves. Go figure, just don't underestimate our ancestors.
    • by Tarrek ( 547315 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:42AM (#10851669)
      Most anthropologists I've studied under, worked with, and recently read, will readily agree to a coastal migration route, either concurrent with the recession of the glacial mass (The Ice Free Corridor- Beringia isn't the time limiting factor with the land bridge model, the fact that Beringia ran straight into a glacier that didn't clear up a free corridor till 11,500ya is), or before it.

      Most everyone accepts at least the reasonable possibility of a pre-clovis occupation.. I'd say most find it likely, but prefer to withold their theories till more evidence can be discovered.

      However- One thing that most of the people I know will agree to: The European route isn't that likely. It's not a matter of denying it because of it's antiquity, nor is it denying that one COULD skirt the ice, had one a significant maritime adaptation- It's the fact that there's no evidence of any Solutrean (European, at this time) maritime adaptation whatsoever. No evidence of reliance on seafood, and very little coastal occupations in the first place.
      • The Atlantic crossing model may have gotten a lot of attention in the media in the past few years, but it's just not well accepted in the biz, so to speak.

        Now, talk about skirting the pacific way the hell before clovis- Well, that's another story entirely.

    • > alternatively, as I recently saw on Nova, these first explorers came from France, the same people who painted the fameous Lascaux caves.

      Actually, that's one scientist's pet hypothesis, and is not generally accepted at present.

      > Go figure, just don't underestimate our ancestors.

      Good advice.

  • I'm ignorant (Score:2, Insightful)

    by gowen ( 141411 )
    ... but I thought carbon dating only worked on organic matter (since its the death of the matter that stops the carbon cycle refreshing the C14 percentage in the tissue). How does this work on stone tools?

    (As to the creationism / darwin debate, people forget that the fact that new evidence can make us throw away previous scientific belief is what's good about science, not what's bad)
    • Re: I'm ignorant (Score:4, Informative)

      by Black Parrot ( 19622 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:43AM (#10851672)


      > ... but I thought carbon dating only worked on organic matter (since its the death of the matter that stops the carbon cycle refreshing the C14 percentage in the tissue). How does this work on stone tools?

      You have to date stone by dating its context. The best way to do it is to sandwich the stones between clearly datable layers, but lots of times you have to just date stuff the stone is "associated with".

      Also, as I understand things 50Kybp is just about at the limit of what you can reliably test with carbon dating.

  • by harriet nyborg ( 656409 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:22AM (#10851598)
    This article contains material on evolution. Evolution is a theory, not a fact, regarding the origin of living things. This material should be approached with an open mind, studied carefully, and critically considered....
      1. This article contains material on evolution. Evolution is a theory, not a fact, regarding the origin of living things. This material should be approached with an open mind, studied carefully, and critically considered....

      By chance, you don't happen to live under a bridge...do you?

      (checks posting history) [slashdot.org] Well! I guess you do!

      • Re:Warning Label (Score:3, Informative)

        by orthogonal ( 588627 )
        By chance, you don't happen to live under a bridge...do you?

        The grandparent poster is making reference to a sticker that one of the southern states (Texas? Alabama?) wants to put on high-school science texts which discuss evolution.

        Presumably, the grandparent poster is underscoring the absurdity of such "governemnt warning labels" for unpopular thought, by demostrating that in any context other than a high-school text, such a warning is and should be treated, as the parent did, as ridiculous.

        Yes, Virgi
    • Also note... (Score:4, Insightful)

      by Dimensio ( 311070 ) <darkstarNO@SPAMiglou.com> on Thursday November 18, 2004 @04:33AM (#10851848)
      Gravity is also a theory, not a fact, regarding the attraction of masses. The belief that you will not suddenly go flying off of the earth for no discernable reason should be approached with an open mind, studied carefully, and critically considered.
  • by leroybrown ( 136516 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:24AM (#10851607) Homepage
    Strom Thurmond

  • doesn't try to bury this one like Kennewick Man [kennewick-man.com]. "Couldn't fuckin' believe that one."

  • Reperations (Score:3, Funny)

    by deft ( 253558 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:41AM (#10851666) Homepage
    wow, they find the decendants of this one and i know where all those native american casino profits are going.

    damn, trying to keep the cave man down.
  • by Anonymous Coward
    50,000 years is stretching carbon dating. That's a whole lot of half lives. Identifying it as a tool is also a stretch. Tools that old look a lot like cracked rocks. I have doubts about searfaring being that old. Where are the older cites closer to a land route?
  • 1999 BBC Documentary (Score:3, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 18, 2004 @03:54AM (#10851716)
    I first read references about a 50,000 year old "New World" culture in a 1999 BBC documentary. They claim that the closest surviving relatives of these original inhabitants are Australian Aborigines.

    The dates listed in this documentary match up to the correct dates from the CNN story (as opposed to the incorrect dates in the story summary).

    Here is a link [bbc.co.uk] a BBC article about the documentary.
    • Yes I saw that. The doco argued that humans had ocean going navigation a long time ago ... not surprising considering even homo floriensis had to do something like that 500,000 years ago. Anyway the doco argued that north and south America were occupied by these people but that the people from Mongolia i.e. the current Native Americans came in and made short work of them. Look it wouldn't surprise me. These days we really underestimate how much nomadic peoples move .. even on a continental scale. For instan

  • by Lord Kano ( 13027 )
    During the California gold rush, a few skeletons of modern looking humans were unearthed from rock that was millions of years old.

    LK
  • It's almost a given that the "Clovis horizon" has been broached. This is only the latest in a long string of discoveries of non-Clovis paleolithic artifacts predating 11000-13000ybp. Arguing against earlier settlement is a bit like sticking to Epicycles after Einstein at this point - completely counter-productive.

    The current model must be updated to show progressive waves of settlement, rather than a single event, and try to discern differences between each of the successive cultures, and try to find where
  • by CAIMLAS ( 41445 )
    Big freaking deal. They've found human footprints, tools, and ceramic artifacts in the SouthWest US, as well as in various parts of Central America, that date that old.
  • Ok, what's the deal here? The article says 50,000 years ago, while the slashdot writeup says 25,000. Either this was an intentional snafu to catch people that don't read the articles - an inside joke - or it was severe stupidity.

    Well, after this election, I'll believe anything... :P
  • by taj ( 32429 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @04:29AM (#10851832) Homepage

    Genus: Stupidious Maximus

    The story behind the letter below is that there is this nutball in Newport, RI named Scott Williams who digs things out of his backyard and sends the stuff he finds to the Smithsonian Institute, labeling them with scientific names, insisting that they are actual archaeological finds. This guy really exists and does this in his spare time! Anyway...here's the actual response from the Smithsonian Institution. Bear this in mind next time you think you are challenged in your duty to respond to a difficult situation in writing.

    Smithsonian Institute
    207 Pennsylvania Avenue
    Washington, DC 20078

    Dear Mr. Williams:

    Thank you for your latest submission to the Institute, labeled "93211-D, layer seven, next to the clothesline post...Hominid skull." ...

    http://www.wilk4.com/humor/humorm20.htm [wilk4.com]
  • Uh huh (Score:4, Insightful)

    by eddeye ( 85134 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @05:27AM (#10852020)

    So people came to South Carolina 25,000 years ago and left no traces on the rest of the continent for 12,000 years? Yeah right. Off the top of my head, here are several more likely explanations:

    • Are the stones really man-made or just geofacts (naturally occuring rocks that almost sorta look like primitive stone tools if you squint your eyes really hard. After botched Lasik surgery.)? Sounds likely from the CNN writeup.
    • Did they date enough samples? You need several samples that return the same age to be reliable.
    • If so, were the samples contaminated? Carbon isn't exactly rare, particularly if it was in the Appalachians (coal deposits).

    INAABMFWIARDL (I'm not an archaeologist but my friend works in a radio-carbon dating lab). People have been scouring the continents for over 50 years and found nothing earlier than ~13,000 BP and suddenly these guys stumble across something twice as old? Even if the site is legit it's gonna take a lot more finds to convince archaeologists people were here that early. People don't exactly confine themselves to small areas and leave no traces for thousands of years.

    Sounds to me like more bogus science "journalism". Write about the crazy new theory to draw eyeballs and devote two paragraphs to the established consensus that this guy's a nut. The author oughta be run out of town on a rail.

    • Re:Uh huh (Score:3, Insightful)

      by Rinikusu ( 28164 )
      Most archaeologists don't bother digging below the Clovis strata in the earth, so they don't actually get to the layers that would contain Pre-Clovis artifacts (from the article). While I won't comment on the specifics of this particular "find", I did some recon/survey of several potential sites for an archaeology class. On one side of a creek was a typical "modern" settle, from around the mid-1600s based upon the various items we found (chucky stones, various points, pestle, etc). On the other side of t
    • Re:Uh huh (Score:4, Funny)

      by pipingguy ( 566974 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @10:30AM (#10854001)

      So people came to South Carolina 25,000 years ago and left no traces on the rest of the continent for 12,000 years? Yeah right. Off the top of my head, here are several more likely explanations:

      [I didn't write this, it is an email classic]

      Paleoanthropology Division
      Smithsonian Institute
      207 Pennsylvania Avenue
      Washington, DC 20078


      Dear Sir:

      Thank you for your latest submission to the Institute, labeled "211-D, layer seven, next to the clothesline post. Hominid skull." We have given this specimen a careful and detailed examination, and regret to inform you that we disagree with your theory that it represents "conclusive proof of the presence of Early Man in Charleston County two million years ago." Rather, it appears that what you have found is the head of a Barbie doll, of the variety one of our staff, who has small children, believes to be the "Malibu Barbie". It is evident that you have given a great deal of thought to the analysis of this specimen, and you may be quite certain that those of us who are familiar with your prior work in the field were loathe to come to contradiction with your findings. However, we do feel that there are a number of physical attributes of the specimen which might have tipped you off to it's modern origin:

      # 1. The material is molded plastic. Ancient hominid remains are typically fossilized bone.

      # 2. The cranial capacity of the specimen is approximately 9 cubic centimeters, well below the threshold of even the earliest identified proto-hominids.

      # 3. The dentition pattern evident on the "skull" is more consistent with the common domesticated dog than it is with the "ravenous man-eating Pliocene clams" you speculate roamed the wetlands during that time. This latter finding is certainly one of the most intriguing hypotheses you have submitted in your history with this institution, but the evidence seems to weigh rather heavily against it. Without going into too much detail, let us say that:

      # A. The specimen looks like the head of a Barbie doll that a dog has chewed on.

      # B. Clams don't have teeth.

      It is with feelings tinged with melancholy that we must deny your request to have the specimen carbon dated. This is partially due to the heavy load our lab must bear in it's normal operation, and partly due to carbon dating's notorious inaccuracy in fossils of recent geologic record. To the best of our knowledge, no Barbie dolls were produced prior to 1956 AD, and carbon dating is likely to produce wildly inaccurate results. Sadly, we must also deny your request that we approach the National Science Foundation's Phylogeny Department with the concept of assigning your specimen the scientific name "Australopithecus spiff-arino." Speaking personally, I, for one, fought tenaciously for the acceptance of your proposed taxonomy, but was ultimately voted down because the species name you selected was hyphenated, and didn't really sound like it might be Latin.

      However, we gladly accept your generous donation of this fascinating specimen to the museum. While it is undoubtedly not a hominid fossil, it is, nonetheless, yet another riveting example of the great body of work you seem to accumulate here so effortlessly. You should know that our Director has reserved a special shelf in his own office for the display of the specimens you have previously submitted to the Institution, and the entire staff speculates daily on what you will happen upon next in your digs at the site you have discovered in your back yard. We eagerly anticipate your trip to our nation's capital that you proposed in your last letter, and several of us are pressing the Director to pay for it. We are particularly interested in hearing you expand on your theories surrounding the "trans-positating fillifitation of ferrous ions in a structural matrix" that makes the excellent juvenile Tyrannosaurus rex femur you recently discovered take on the deceptive appearance of a rusty 9-mm Sears Craftsman automotive crescent wrench.

      Yours in Science,

      Harvey Rowe
      Curator, Antiquities
  • by Danathar ( 267989 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @05:30AM (#10852028) Journal
    Recently the PBS show "NOVA" had a whole show about the possiblity of people comming over earlier than first thought, and the possibility of them actually boating accross from Europe along the glacier that would of stretched from the north pole as frar down as Iceland.

    There is RNA evidence that some native peoples here in the U.S. might have come from a population that was from the area that is now France.

    link below to NOVA web site with the program

    http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/stoneage/ [pbs.org]
  • by Cryofan ( 194126 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @08:41AM (#10852818) Journal
    Holpfully, this dig will confirm that the first people in America were not the ancestors of the current Native Americans, but of another race, so to speak.

    It appears that the first homo sapiens settlers of Asia and of North America were related to some of the Australian aborigines, specfically, the Murrayians, which were a mix that included a protocaucasoid type.

    You can see a picture of what these amazing people may have looked like here. [tripod.com]

    THey are also related to the Ainu of Japan.

    They conquered Asia, Indonesia, Australia and then the Americas long before the ancestors of the present Asians moved across the Bering Straits.

    Traces of them have been found in the Americas, however. The Kennewick man was likely related to them. In the next year or two, new research out of mexico will likely confirm their presence. Some traces of the typical Murrayian skeletal features (but their genetics) have been seen in current (or recent) native Americans in Baja California and Tierra Del Fuego (see here [andaman.org] for more.

    THey may have been the first homo sapiens out of Africa. However the Negritos may have been before them.
  • by peter303 ( 12292 ) on Thursday November 18, 2004 @10:11AM (#10853742)
    Scientists will argue endlessly whether a charcoal deposit is a hearth or natural fire, rock chips are artifacts or flood debris. There is a similar debate in Australia where some potential sites are nearly double the age of the oldest bones.

Whoever dies with the most toys wins.

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