Space Wedding Successful

The Llama King writes "Love transcends all, including gravity, the atmosphere and orbital altitudes. According to this story at the Houston Chronicle, "Yuri Malenchenko didn't let the fact that he's living aboard the international space station stop him from marrying his bride, Ekaterina Dmitriev." The bride was at Johnson Space Center near Houston, while the groom circled 240 miles above her. The honeymoon will have to wait."

Kiss the Bride

[Devil's BSD]

So, did he kiss the camera or the television screen when the pastor said "the groom may now kiss the bride"?

Strange but true

[einhverfr]

So, did he kiss the camera or the television screen when the pastor said "the groom may now kiss the bride"?

Before the days of telecommunications, such a wedding would be done by proxy. I do not assume that there would be any kissing or anything, but basically one of the people would designate someone else to go through the ceremony on their behalf.

Aww shucks

[Gherald]

Get back to me when the couple is in space together. And post videos.

Re:Aww shucks

[evilviper]

Watching the video:

Gee, what's that weird looking thing floating around???

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!

The wedding is the easy part...

[vudufixit]

Making a marriage work till death
do you part - now *that's* a challenge.

Re:The wedding is the easy part...

[roman_mir]

"Till death do you part" - not difficult at all! ... :)

Good thing you haven't found that password...

[Dareth]

... cause if half of what you said is true... then you must have one hell of a low UID!!!

Re:The wedding is the easy part...

[hesiod]

> Some people simply refuse to be the masters of their sexual appetites

And some people refuse to accept that sexual appetites are NORMAL, otherwise we wouldn't have them. Some people refuse to accept that God isn't going to send them to Hell for eternity because they had sex (oh no!) with more than one person.

someone must say it

[Pharmboy]

"One of these days Alice, POW! To the moon!"

If you don't understand that, you don't watch enough TV Land or just entirely too young.

Re:someone must say it

[AndroidCat]

Is that the classic where Ralph dresses up as the man from space?

Re:someone must say it

[Pharmboy]

Is that the classic where Ralph dresses up as the man from space?

actually, its many episodes. it was a running gag.

Re:someone must say it

[AndroidCat]

I know, I saw them. On the B&W TV, when the episodes were new, and nobody has two TVs...

Who says that was a reference to The Honeymooners? :^P

Re:someone must say it

[Chronowerx]

Alternate Slashdot version;

"One of these days Ndnd, bang, zoom, straight to the third moon of omicron perei 8!"

Or not enough Futurama...

[Kjella]

...remember a certain Lunar park? ;)

Kjella

Re:Or not enough Futurama...

[Cyno01]

We're whalers of the moon...

Successful!!!?!??

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm sorry, but Successful!?

How the hell would it be unsuccessful - are there technical issues related to communicating vows over a radio link or something... although how did they sign the register?

And consummation, well, you don't want any problems on re-entry I guess - fly me to the moon baby!

Re: Successfull!!?!??

[Dukeofshadows]

They are rumored to start practicing their skills in docking procedures as soon as he gets back.

Re:Successful!!!?!??

[FroBugg]

None of the X-Prize contestants docked with the ISS just as the priest asked if anyone had any objections. In that sense, it's quite a success.

Re:Successful!!!?!??

[David Gould]

It ain't successful 'til it's consummated. (I guess they could cyber, but that wouldn't really count.) Let's get him down safe, and then call it successful.

Successful?

[Anonymous Coward]

What, were you expecting a crash or something to interrupt the wedding?

Weddings are almost always successful. On the other hand, living with shackles for the rest of your life... =P

would they be legally married?

[m.lemur]

don't both parties have to sign the marriage register and get it witnessed together for a marriage to be valid?

As a married man I can guarantee him that after about a year he'll be begging to be allowed back on spacestation.... alone.

Re:would they be legally married?

[Frymaster]

yes. it's just like on a boat - the captain can marry you legally and the register is signed on land at a later date.

Re:would they be legally married?

[3waygeek]

Not exactly [straightdope.com]; there are legal precedents on both sides of the issue.

Re:would they be legally married?

[el-spectre]

There are some special Texan rules, as I recall, that make it ok.

of course they are

[twitter]

The submit button is binding everywhere!

Re:would they be legally married?

[hesiod]

> You'd think these days a person could digitally sign that or send a fax...

Man, what a sad, backward time when my PGP key isn't a valid signature for my marriage license.

Silly Texans

[Jason_says]

Texas law allows weddings in which one of the parties is not present.

Thats just funny...oh wait,ummm. This could be my only chance to marry a supermodel.

I'm moving to Texas!!!! ....I hope I don't get the chair for this.

Re:Silly Texans

[stephanruby]

Texas law allows weddings in which one of the parties is not present.

It's the backup plan in case the shotgun goes off.

Not yet

[A nonymous Coward]

I was under the impression that it's pretty easy to annul an uncomsummated marriage.

Re:Not yet

[mattkime]

particularly if you haven't yet displayed the blood spotted sheets to the neighbors

Re:Not yet

[Drakonian]

You've gotta be joking me!? Any links or anything to back that up?

Ooh, kinky.

[slackingme]

We know who is on top now, but one has to wonder about the honeymoon..

The Absent Minded Groom

[Cordath]

"Texas law allows weddings in which one of the parties is not present. "

Physically absent obviously works, but how about mentally absent? How about both? Could a cardboard cut-out and a talented ventriloquist be all that's needed to wed someone in a coma? Could this lead to a mediocre sequel to "While you were sleeping."? With the wonders of artificial insemination a swinging bachelor could easily wake up from a 20-year coma and immediately face college bills for his kids.

Re:The Absent Minded Groom

[Mononoke]

"Texas law allows weddings in which one of the parties is not present. "

Physically absent obviously works, but how about mentally absent?

George and Laura Bush were wed in Texas. Draw your own conclusions.

honeymoon

[Ugodown]

Too bad she can't come up for the honeymoon. If ya know what I mean.

Re:honeymoon

[arth1]

If he's replied to even a fraction of all his email offers, I'm sure his penis has grown so much that it'll reach.
And if he hasn't, there's always good ole IRC and one-handed typing.

Regards,
--
*Art

Re:honeymoon

[superpeach]

If ya know what I mean.

No, please explain.

Re:honeymoon

[Gherald]

No, please explain.

It has to do with some sort of primal urge to copulate.

But don't ask. I can't understand it either.

Pregnant pause

[m_chan]

That must have been one brutal pregnant pause to wait for the radio lag between "Do you take..." and the "I do". I wonder if for a second the thought passed through the poor guy's head..."Is she thinking about it?" I didn't see in the article where he was in orbit. Heck, instead of 380km he could have been more like 6,400 km away or so. Did they wait to do the ceremony until he was more or less overhead? I wonder if this is the farthest apart two people have been when they were married, other than when MJ married Lisa Marie Presley.

Re:Pregnant pause

[JeanPaulBob]

(-1, Dated Reference)

Interesting...

[Keebler71]

I find it interesting that the Russian Space Agency objected to this because they thought he was showboating and it would be an unappropriate, yet seem to have no problem launching boy-band members into space if they have the coin.

Re:Interesting...

[Pharmboy]

I find it interesting that the Russian Space Agency objected to this because they thought he was showboating and it would be an unappropriate, yet seem to have no problem launching boy-band members into space if they have the coin.

Lol, damn good point. But it seems like its getting easier and easier for many European countries to be against anything we do in America.

Re:Interesting...

[Anonymous Coward]

...seem to have no problem launching boy-band members into space if they have the coin.

You're assuming they planned to bring him back down.

Bringing back boy-band boys

[efedora]

I'm sure NASA would have offered him a seat on the next shuttle coming back. Oh well.....

Re:Interesting...

[stephanruby]

It's called capitalism. You can showboat all you want as long as you pay for it yourself.

Malenchenko is a serving Russian military officer

[hughk]

and normally he would not be permitted to marry a foreigner. His bride, Yekatrina Dmitryevna although Russian born, is a US citizen. Luckily things have been sorted due to public pressure. It seems the Russian people told the military not to be stupid.

The wedding was planned a long time before , and before the shuttle disaster and the disruption to the usual schedule and the extended missions.

He may not be allowed up again, but hopefully with some skillful publicity (the video rights were sold), he won'

As someone who's been married for a while

[Dancin_Santa]

I can say that 240 miles away from the wife is about as good a honeymoon as you can get.

Who would have thought

[Gherald]

It has been 15 minutes since a story about love & marriage appeared on Slashdot, and no one has been modded "Insightful" or "Informative" yet.

Re:Who would have thought

[Lord_Dweomer]

I'm more amused at the absence of "In Soviet Russia" jokes! Maybe I just need to lower my threshold.

A little early to tell

[Anonymous Coward]

It's hard to say that this wedding is successful. After all, they are just married. It will take a couple years of dish throwing and trips to the hospital and county lockup before we can say one way or another whether this was a successful match up.

Rats.

[mrpuffypants]

I thought that they were botth up there. We could have killed two birds w/ one stone:

1) First space wedding

2) First space fucking

Re:Rats.

[Esion Modnar]

2) First space fucking

Simple. Just open the airlock. They're fucked.

Re:Rats.

[thynk]

Are you positive it would be the first space screwing? We've been sending people up of both sexes, the cameras don't cover EVERY part of the ship and you have to imagine the novelity of it all would have a lot of appeal for either sex.

I know it would be one of the *first* things I'd want to try in space.

Re:Rats.

[Anonymous Coward]

I know it would be one of the *first* things I'd want to try in space.

Haven't had much luck on Terra?

Doubtful.

[simetra]

Nah, those astronauts aren't like real people. Most are straight as an arrow - you have to be to be in good enough physical and mental shape to do that. Most are likely married. It's highly unlikely that on any given mission, there would be two willing and able participants. It's not like they recruit crack whores for astronauts. Maybe if a married couple were sent... maybe. I'm sure there's rules against cracking open a six pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon and seducing your fellow astronauts.

Though, it wou

Re:Doubtful.

[el-spectre]

A few years ago there was a married couple on the shuttle. NASA tastefully deflected all the 'sex in space' inquiries.

Re:Doubtful.

[CausticWindow]

NASA more or less have confirmed that there have been copulation in space on their missions. Don't remember the name of the program, but it was sent on Discovery.

And you don't have to be a crack whore to enjoy sex in new places (space for example). That's just your puritan American upbringing talking.

Re:Rats.

[Monkey-Man2000]

According to numerouse reports such as this [wired.com], two Russian cosmonauts got it on in 1995. (Of course, they denied it because they're both married to other people.)

Porn in space would sell well

[mnmn]

It would earn the Russians more than sending boy bands up there, they know the sales of porn since the 70s during which time they had the monopoly.

There might be a space race going between them and Americas. A seperate cargo rocket will carry the viagra.

I feel like a cosmonaut!

[AndroidCat]

I too have received offers to get hitched with a hot russian woman from a long distance!

Damn you!

[Quasar1999]

Damn slashdot!

I come here to forget about how horribly lonely I feel... I'm a grade 'A', by the books, no bloody doubt, computer nerd. And as such, I have NO love life... so why must you speak of marriage? I can't even get a damn girlfriend... I'm sitting here reading slashdot to try and forget how miserable an existance I have writing code for a living, with absolutely no social life... and you have the nerve to post a marriage story???

Re:Damn you!

[grungebox]

Have you considered becoming an astronaut?

Re:Damn you!

[tinrobot]

I come here to forget about how horribly lonely I feel...

I hate to say it, but you're coming to the wrong place. Go somewhere where you're not behind a computer screen. Someplace where there are flesh and blood people. Take classes, go to the gym, join an interest group, volunteer... anything, really.

As interesting as Slashdot can be, it's no sunstitute for human contact.

Re:Damn you!

[user32.ExitWindowsEx]

Be happy....You *DO* have a job.

Besides, if you just start hating people, then you'll be glad you're alone.

Re:Damn you!

[elementik]

/me plays the worlds shortest tune on the worlds smallest violin.

Damn dude, there's someone for everyone out there but you're never gonna find them by sitting on your fat (and getting fatter by the minute) ass whining about it. Go out, go the library / a pub or club / christ, go for a WALK in the park (buy a dog) and actually say hello to someone ...

Oh wait, it's easier to say "oh i'm a failure *SOB* the world should stop" instead of doing something about it.

Marriages w/ a non-present party

[kaltkalt]

Many states allow this. The primary purpose is so people in the military who have been called to duty can marry their significant other left back at home ("Gee, I might get killed over here and never see you again... I want to get married now just in case I never get the chance to see you again....") So a serviceman over in Iraq can marry his girlfriend who is still here in the states. Proxies are allowed, too.

Re:Marriages w/ a non-present party

[mrpuffypants]

Proxies are allowed, to

In that case I'll use anonymizer. Should make the wedding interesting.

Re:Marriages w/ a non-present party

[Mononoke]

("Gee, I might get killed over here and never see you again... I want to get married now just in case I never get the chance to see you again....")

Actually, there are much more important reasons: Marriage grants automatic reciprocal "powers of attorney" type rights which gives the spouse at home legal rights to handle legal details for the soldier, plus it makes the new spouse eligible for benefits should something bad happen to the soldier.

If I remember correctly, the soldier also gets a raise in pay.

Re:Marriages w/ a non-present party

[kaltkalt]

Yes, this is true. There are many real, legal benefits to marriage, which is why gay marriage is more than just a trivial issue.

Re:Marriages w/ a non-present party

[paul248]

Proxies are allowed, too.
What about NAT?

Re:Marriages w/ a non-present party

[Theory of Everything]

Proxies are allowed, too.

How about for the consummation?

There is no hope for us

[TheFairElf]

Even if you're in space, you cannot escape getting married. So much for my "i'm out of town" excuse.

Just like my father used to say

[Anonymous Coward]

Marriage is the easy part. The fiery reentry is the hard part. And if you deorbit enough it grows boring from the familiarity.

Picture here

[DRWHOISME]

pretty hot.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/030 810/161/4xwoo.html

correct link here.

[DRWHOISME]

Hot wife [yahoo.com]

Re:correct link here.

[Overly Critical Guy]

The husband looks frighteningly like spoon-bender Uri Geller.

Men are from ISS, women are from earth

[EqualSlash]

Get ready for John Gray's next book.

Marriage in Space

[Esion Modnar]

Cause noone can hear you scream.

Yes, but ...

[Vinnie_333]

Yes, but the space "consumation of the wedding" will be much harder!

Marriage in Space?

[dafoomie]

Can the captain of the ship marry you in space like he can at sea? Captain Kirk did it... No wait, the groom died, didn't he? Hope the cosmonaut isn't wearing a red shirt.

My buddy was in the groom's party...

[Beatlebum]

He said the ceremony was totally lacking in atmosphere.

He is russian

[Billly Gates]

In Soviet Union Russia Weddings marry YOU!

Marriage Transcript

[super-momo]

Priest. Mr. Malenchenko. Do you want to take her as your wife? Blah blah. Over

Malenchenko: Roger. Yes I do. Over.

[Communication dropped due to slashdot effect.]

Dmitriev: What about me?!?!

Priest: Well, I guess we'll have to try again tomorrow!

Rerun

[LooseChanj]

Didn't they do this on an episode of MASH?

Hittin' IT

[Eezy Bordone]

That's a long time to wait to "hit it".

Shouldn't we wait a few decades...

[CustomDesigned]

to see if they're still together before pronouncing the marriage "successful"?

Congrats to Yuri

[mao che minh]

nt

The National Enquirer...

[Alien Being]

had a helicopter hovering above the ISS throughout the ceremony.

Re:The National Enquirer...

[stereoroid]

Nah. Hello [google.com] pay a lot better, don't they? Jusrt ask Cath-Zeta-Jones & hubby.

So when will we see...

[E-Rock-23]

...the first space divorce?

/sad but had to be said

Could You Picture

[Matt_Fisher]

GOD! Whats the night of there honeymoon like... Well thanks god for webcams :>S

Astronaut ice cream

[Ilan Volow]

I've always thought that the gift shop at the Smithsonian Museum of Air and Space should sell freeze-dried wedding cake.

Now they'll have to listen to me!.

Of course the real question is...

[MillionthMonkey]

How long until someone runs in a California gubernatorial recall election while aboard the International Space Station?

The list of candidates for this upcoming recall election was finalized yesterday, and people in space are hardly represented at all. There are 155 candidates on the ballot, so you would think that at least a few of them would be in orbit around the earth right now. But not a single one of them is currently in free fall at the moment, and in fact, not a single member of this opportunist whack-pack has ever been in space at all. In fact, the most space experience any of them has involves a starring role in a Hollywood movie set on Earth and Mars.

Davis, for his part, has never been in space either, and has a consistent record of not hiring spacemen to work for him. In fact, whatever the outcome of the recall election, one thing is certain: the future governor of California will not be running the state from orbit. Is this the kind of future we want for California? Think of the children.

There may be issues with California state law. In a transparently cynical attempt to keep the spacefaring community out of the California political process, the state may require that the candidate appear in person to sign papers registering for the ballot. The 65 signatures can be collected remotely, and the $3500 transferred by wire, so why should the signature remain as an insurmountable problem? I'm sure reasonable states like Texas allow a person to register for the ballot while in space. Other roadblocks thrown in the path of astronauts seeking to join the recall ballot include a 15-day California residency requirement. Davis supporters argue that this is simply to restrict the election to California residents. But when your orbiting spacecraft has been entering and leaving the borders of the state of California at least once a day for hundreds of days, it becomes pretty hypocritical for someone to insist that you haven't racked up your 15.

Voters are tired of "politics as usual". It's time for someone with a fresh perspective on the issues in Sacramento. From 240 miles up, moving by at 17000 miles per hour, through a little glass porthole.

Who says the honeymoon has to wait?

[stereoroid]

Isn't that what teledildo's, etc. are for? (No, I'm not going looking for links!)

I can see a small problem: the com-link between them might be line of sight, so he'd be dropping over the horizon just as things started getting good... "da... da!... bozhe moi!"

I wanna know

[Cackmobile]

Has anybody ever ahd sex in space. I reckon it would be really sweet as. no worrying about whos on top etc. Those russian guys were up there by themselves for a year so masturbation in space must ahve happened.

First!? Bah!

[X86Daddy]

The first successful "Space Wedding" will involve both parties being in space, and having a uniquely low-g honeymoon.

The cool part is, there's nothing to really prevent this from happening soon, what with space tourism finally having occured, etc...

For the honeymoon

[roman_mir]

they should just repeat the Apollo 13 theme

NASA gadgets

[Anonymous Coward]

Likely NASA already has a quiet solution to the problem, like those cyanide capsules "Just in Case". Probably it's a $6000 old sock that conforms to milspec.

Re:

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:Only idiots marry.

[dreadnougat]

" She doesn't get prettier over the years..." Neither do you, and you're gonna start regretting it when you haven't had sex in 40 years. And then there's this thing called "love" that you seem to have no concept of.