Wearing a Tie May Cause Blindness! 441
An anonymous reader noted that there finally is some science to justify not wearing a tie! Doctors have found that wearing a tie too tight causes pressure on the jugular vein, which leads to a build-up of pressure in the eyeballs. Such pressure rises have been linked to glaucoma, which causes blindness. Now, if only some kind researchers could get us all out of wearing pants at the office, we'd be set!
more than you bargained for... (Score:4, Funny)
I'd just like to remind you, you're the one working with CowboyNeal [cowboyneal.org], not us.
Mike
Re:more than you bargained for... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:more than you bargained for... (Score:3, Funny)
Fuck pantlessness, let us smoke pot (Score:5, Funny)
If we could take pot-breaks to combat blindness, well, now you're talking.
Re:Fuck pantlessness, let us smoke pot (Score:2, Funny)
as (Score:5, Funny)
Re:as (Score:5, Funny)
Re:as (Score:5, Funny)
Re:as (Score:3, Funny)
Re:as (Score:5, Funny)
Re:as (Score:4, Informative)
If it's your's, it's optional. Personally, I find the wool of the tartan can chafe, so I usually do. Particularly when attending weddings, as there can be alot of dancing involved.
(As a side issue, always remember to move your sporran before dancing. A bouncing sporran can cause undue wincing.)
Oh, and kilts are babe magnets.
Re:as (Score:3, Informative)
Re:as (Score:3, Informative)
There's actaully a big patch of cotton on the inside of mine. Us poor Highlanders can't afford silk. That's for you soft 13th gen ex-pats. Still more comfortable with undercrackers.
And it's not "momma" in Scotland. I think you'll find it's "Maw".
Kilts (Score:4, Interesting)
for wearing pants: they're optional. you are also allowed to wear a skirt, kilt or dress.
I own two kilts, and I do wear them to work sometimes. For casual wear, great for summer weather, buy a Utilikilt [utilikilts.com]. They're not very expensive. Check out these Top 10 Reasons for Wearing a Kilt [utilikilts.com].
Afraid you'll look silly in something that looks like a skirt? Don't be. Wearing a kilt shows a sense of security with yourself, and you will inspire much debate in others.
Overweight? Not a problem. Order one with a Beer Gut Cut. The beer gut cut is for guys who carry a little extra weight down in front. You can order a single, or double (God help you), beer gut cut.
Pants(American) or Pants(British) (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Pants(American) or Pants(British) (Score:3, Funny)
Werepants?
Is that some kind of horrible pant-based creature that can only be destroyed by silver scissors?
Re:Pants(American) or Pants(British) (Score:4, Funny)
Not that one. In New Zealand anyway, Pants are slacks/trousers, whilst underpants/gruts are y-fronts/boxers/jockeys/slips/briefs. But we wear shorts anyway (traditionally green shorts, black singlet ("vest" to pommies), black gumboots (although kids are wearing fancy colours these days) and probably a floppy cotton hat).
No problem here... (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:No problem here... (Score:5, Funny)
"What do you wear to work?"
Suit
Shirt, tie, and slacks
Polos and khakis
T-shirt and jeans
Shorts and sandals
I telecommute, you insensitive clod!
I left my clothes at CowboyNeal's last night
Re:No problem here... (Score:5, Funny)
if you telecommute, it's pretty much guaranteed you work naked; well, it'd be stupid not to.
Re:No problem here... (Score:4, Funny)
Glaucoma huh? (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:Glaucoma huh? (Score:4, Funny)
only if it's too tight though... (Score:5, Insightful)
not quite the strength of argument for me to bash my boss with health and safety law!
Re:only if it's too tight though... (Score:5, Informative)
Re:only if it's too tight though... (Score:5, Informative)
Re:only if it's too tight though... (Score:5, Insightful)
I can see it now... (Score:3, Funny)
GUARANTEED!1
Re:only if it's too tight though... (Score:3, Informative)
Re:only if it's too tight though... (Score:3, Funny)
Calamity Ensues.
P.S> If the measurements with the tape measure "down" are
umm... (Score:5, Funny)
Did you just ask about fashion tips on Slashdot?
ARE YOU INSANE!?!?
Re:only if it's too tight though... (Score:3, Insightful)
You misspelled something there -- the word "not" should be replaced by ^H^H^H.
Hope this helps.
I haven't worn a tie to work for more than 11 years. The last time I wore a tie for business purposes was for an interview that seemed to go well -- I was interested in the work, they seemed to be interested in me... The next morning I got a call from my headhuntress who told me that the company definitely like my qualifications, but that I "didn't fit their image;
Re:only if it's too tight though... (Score:3, Interesting)
True that.
I'd like to think that it's one of the perks of having 18 years of experience. Of course, I'm expensive enough that I've gotta start worrying about being replaced by a couple or three young pups willing to work for much less than I'd accept.
"Dear Sirs: I must decline your offer of employment, since you have obviously misconstrued my salary requirements as thousands per year instead of dollars per hour."
I have
Er... (Score:4, Funny)
Judging by the general clientele of slashdot, myself included, I'm hoping that this never comes to pass.
Think of the co-workers, I tell you.
Remember kids: Graphic, disturbing images can cause hysterical blindness.
Paid for by the Clinton Foundation (Score:5, Funny)
Researches funded by the William Jefferson Clinton Foundation are feverishly working on this one, don't worry.
Re:Paid for by the Clinton Foundation (Score:3, Funny)
So just tell your boss that wearing pants infringes on your right to reproduce. .
KFG
Keep your pants on, Taco (Score:3, Funny)
Pants (Score:3, Funny)
Using the British definition of the word "pants" (underwear/briefs) this proposition seems EVEN LESS sensible!
Makes sense... (Score:5, Funny)
Only in the Winter... (Score:2, Funny)
Obligatory Simpsons' quote (Score:5, Funny)
and later on...
"Don't you hate pants?!"
pcow
Re:Obligatory Simpsons' quote (Score:2, Funny)
Pants-optional office? (Score:2)
Now, if only some kind researchers could get us all out of wearing pants at the office, we'd be set!
I don't think I'd mind wearing a kilt to work, though the wool would be kinda scratchy. And a bit warm, too, in Alabama's summer weather. Still, the US military services do have their own tartans, so it could even be considered "in uniform." :)
Re:Pants-optional office? (Score:2)
Pantless Fridays! (Score:3, Funny)
Hawaiian shirt Fridays is as far as I've gotten but it's just not the same.
=tkk
Re:Pantless Fridays! (Score:2)
Re:Pantless Fridays! (Score:2)
Yeah, but when she sobers up, and remembers that she hates your ass, the next morning she is crying in HR about how you date raped her ass; how she would NEVER take it up the ass were she sober, and that your ass should be fired. And YOU WILL BE.
From an actual true story; I shit you not.
two things.... (Score:2)
Second, management in general needs to relax. Hopefully the tightness around their necks causes glaucoma and because there are entirely too many managers out there, this will force the legalization of medical marijuana and and end to the pressure of glaucoma!
uhoh (Score:5, Funny)
*takes off his belt*
Re:uhoh (Score:3, Funny)
Funny.... (Score:3, Informative)
I find that funny for CmdrTaco [slashdot.org] to say that, given his sig says "Pants are still optional, but recommended for you."
Re:Funny.... (Score:3, Funny)
Comment removed (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:wearing pants? (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:wearing pants? (Score:3, Insightful)
Dress code harm (Score:3, Insightful)
For instance, I never, ever wear a tie at work, because it's hazardous to my health, and that of others... let me explain. Working in emergency services puts me in contact with all sorts of antisocial, psychotic, and generally dangerous characters. Ever look at a tied necktie and say to yourself "hmmm... that looks kind of like a noose..." Well, you're right, it does. It also ACTS li
Ooh! Free negation of badness? (Score:3, Funny)
Soo.. since I wear no tie, I have in practice "negated" the blinding effect of masturbation?!
Or was that... <checks palms>
New disclaimer on ties... (Score:2, Funny)
Dress code (Score:2, Interesting)
One on hand it's no big deal, but on the other I really, really would prefer to wear khakis and a short sleeve button-down or polo shirt. I hate having to dress up! At my last job I gradually downshifted my dress code but that took a couple of years of inculcating my bosses to the change. I
Comment removed (Score:4, Funny)
This just in! (Score:5, Funny)
Wearing Wedding Rings Makes Fingers Fall Off!
Squeezing Stress Balls May Aggrevate Repetitive Stress Disorders!
Cleaning Your Keyboard Can Extend Your Lifespan!
Wearing Dress Shoes Sucks!
Reading Slashdot Constantly Can Lead To Blindness!
Small point but .. (Score:5, Interesting)
This is possibly one of the most useless bits of "research" for a while and i'm amazed it didn't come out of a UK university.
My old Uni announced to a great fanfare that they had provded that "the smell of food made people hungry". Another one was that "people look fatter on television than they really are".
Re:Small point but .. (Score:3, Insightful)
J.
Re:Small point but .. (Score:3, Funny)
"It's not the film that makes you look fat. It's the fat that makes you look fat."
Pants-free working place, a casual wear? (Score:4, Funny)
Casual friday [snafu-comics.com] all week long?
I could live with that...
Also (Score:5, Funny)
Get a decent one (Score:5, Interesting)
One thing that I have found is that the combination of the shirt collar and tie encourage me to sit with correct posture, otherwise I can feel them cutting into my throat. This is a good thing.
Of course, you could always wear a 'clip-on' tie or bow-tie (how come I only see doctors wear them?) which also have certain personal safety benefits - like not having to worry about being killed/maimed if it gets caught in a shredder =]
Re:Get a decent one (Score:5, Funny)
I'm just glad management wears ties. It's something to strangle the fuckers with if I see the need.
Choking (Score:2, Funny)
The good things to come from science (Score:2, Funny)
Brilliant. Love it when old prejudices are, ahum, beaten off.
and this is bad because... (Score:2)
Yeah, that's what I have officer, glaucoma from wearing this tie. Can you give me back my medicine now?
Dress code = Lawsuit! (Score:2)
"Shoes are bad for my back, and for that matter, my toes need to BREATHE"
"Deodorant is toxic poison, you cant make me use it, and you cant fire me for what occurs natually in nature; I KNOW MY RIGHTS!!!!"
"Did you take my red stapler, asshole?"
Yep, this is gr
Welding causes blindness ... (Score:3, Funny)
Programmer uniform (Score:5, Funny)
So get a bigger collar size (Score:5, Insightful)
So buy some shirts with an extra half-inch in the collar, guys.
Y'know, current trends in fashion notwithstanding, I like neckties. They break up an otherwise monotonous dress shirt, and give us white-collar male workers an easy way to add some multi-colored style to our two-color uniform. They just plain look professional. And they're only uncomfortable if you're wearing them wrong, or if your collar is too small.
Re:So get a bigger collar size (Score:5, Insightful)
--trb
Re:So get a bigger collar size (Score:3, Funny)
Re:So get a bigger collar size (Score:3, Insightful)
This is worth the karma... (Score:2, Funny)
Thank you, thank you. Drive safely and make sure to tip your waitress.
Next On the List?? (Score:2)
Pants, Ties, Polo shirts etc... (Score:4, Insightful)
i think that the IT industry should come up with a dress code that actually lets you crawl around on the floor under a desk etc... that makes some stinkin sense.
a T-shirt, jeans, sneakers and some sort of smock or whatever its called. Like the ones that they wear in the hospitals etc... and they would have to be nice jeans and sneakers. not the shit you have left over from high school with your ass sticking out and sneakers that are no longer the original color that they were purchased as...
and im SERIOUS!!! i think that this should become a norm... i hate being in the data center and working on the UPS or racks or up in the ceiling with light colored polo shirt on that i spent 30 bucks for. when im done - its done. im sure this has happened to everyone. it pisses me off. the wife bitches that she cant get it clean etc...
and i dont care if its "professional" or not. im a "professional" no matter what im wearing - and wouldnt it be nice if you could be comfortable all the time???
duke
Comment removed (Score:3, Funny)
acursed editors! (Score:2)
Now isn't that just like the slashdot editors...always have to put in some snarky comment to take a dig at the company that won't let you go pantless. You call this journalism!?
Great Scott.... (Score:4, Funny)
As this time-travelling picture [angelfire.com] from the year 2006 shows, the pantsless office policy at Slashdot was not such a great idea.
First masturbation, now this! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:First masturbation, now this! (Score:3, Funny)
Damn... that fills in the second step on my business plan!
1. Distill hooch
2. Go blind (formerly ???)
3. Profit!!
Re:First masturbation, now this! (Score:3, Funny)
Dad: Stop, or you'll go blind!
Son: Dad, I'm over here.
Let me get this straight... (Score:5, Funny)
1. Masturbating keeps your prostate healthy.
2. Eating pizza helps prevent cancer
3. Not wearing a tie can preserve your eyesight
Bout time we had a run of good news
Conformist behavior (Score:5, Interesting)
"We'll see about that" she said with an angry look on her face as she ran to the boss' office to tell him of my criminal behavior. I walked over to the office and popped my head in the door.
"The secretary says you won't be wearing a tie tomorrow" he stated with one eyebrow raised.
"Sorry, but I don't wear ties" I replied.
"Okay, I didn't hire you for your looks and thanks for letting me know" he smiled.
The secretary nearly passed out when I didn't get the death penalty for not wearing a tie. Till this day I have never seen conformist behavior quite like that.
Ties and suits are "dangerwear" (Score:3, Insightful)
The same goes for the tails of the birds of paradise, the longer the tail the more danger the bird is in, and more attractive to fenales.
This is "dangerwear", and in its extreme human form, comes in the form of military uniforms.
Women like to look at men in suits because if you can survive a day of strangulation, you are by definition tough, and that's good, somehow.
(I'm not sure why the ability to bear suffering is attractive to women, but nature has its reasons, I guess.)
However, scientifically this can be measured. Half the geeks wear a tie and suit for a month, the other half wear comfortable shorts and sandals. At the end of the month, who got more sex?
Far-fetched, I know, but just maybe...
Necktie Origins (Score:4, Interesting)
Re:No Pants? (Score:5, Funny)
How does one do that? Is it like checking eyeball fluid pressure?
Re:No Pants? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:No Pants? (Score:2, Insightful)
I always thought they seemed kind of like nooses, now I guess I know I wasn't that far off.
Re:No Pants? (Score:5, Funny)
"Woah, Taco's in my office with no pants!
What is a tie? (Score:5, Funny)
I'm not sure what this says about people who wear bowties...
Re:Wearing a dress at work freaks my cow-orkers (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Did you know... (Score:2, Funny)
who to believe?
Re:Pants are the problem... (Score:3, Funny)
You are advocating thongs, then?
Re:No Pants? No Problem!!! (Score:2)