1st Cup Of Coffee: Hardening Your Arteries 304
mikewhittaker writes "A recent article on The Times refer to a report which indicates that the intake of caffeine from a single coffee can have adverse effects on your arteries and heart." Actually, it goes so far to say that the first cup of coffee is the worst. Of course, basically, anything you do is bad for at some level, so I guess it's choosing your poisons.
Easy fix (Score:5, Funny)
Glad I switched! (Score:5, Funny)
Whew. That was close. Glad I switched to espresso!
Don't know, (Score:2, Funny)
Water kills too. (Score:2, Funny)
I take it... (Score:2, Funny)
Imagine if you will:
Reefer: "Yeah, dude, I got this nasty shit from Columbia!"
Stoner: "Yo dude, gimme some of that..."
Reefer: "Ya gotta swollow 2 oz of those coffee grounds with hot water, dude!"
Stoner: "Cooooollllll... my parents will never figure it out! Sweet! I'll pay ya $2000 for it!"
CrAZy CoFFee StoRY (Score:2, Funny)
And since the research hasn't been published, one can assume that the study has not been peer reviewed - or even hasn't been accepted as worthy science.
So therefore, no one knows if this study is the next greatest find, or just a piece of crap designed to grab headlines.
I suspect the later.
Precisely. (Score:3, Funny)
Cheers,
vic
No More Slashdot (Score:3, Funny)
This, of course, would improve workplace productivity in the key IT depts around the nation.
Therefore, a ban on coffee will lead to increased productivity and a rise in economic output, thereby solving the nations economic woes.
Therefore, drinking coffee is the cause of the current economic downturn.
But none of you have read this because you all just gave up coffee.
Nothing wrong with this logic.
coffee quotes (Score:5, Funny)
and sweet as love."
* Sheikh Abd-al-Kadir (1587): "No one can understand the truth until
he drinks of coffee's frothy goodness."
* Sir James MacKintosh (18th century philosopher): "The powers of a
man's mind are directly proportional to the quantity of coffee he
drank."
* Johann Sebastian Bach (1732, an aria from his 'Kaffee-Kantate'):
"Ah! How sweet coffee tastes! Lovlier than a thousand kisses,
sweeter than muscatel wine! I must have my coffee..."
* David Letterman (Esquire Interview Fall '94): "If it wasn't for
coffee, I'd have no discernible personality at all."
* Chris Egolf (1993): "This damn pot is too fucking slow!"
* Wise New York City Homeless Man (1996, to Chris Egolf): "Son, you
need to get some coffee in you so people know you're alive!"
Play: Caffiene and Quake (Score:5, Funny)
Drink up! Yippeee...! Er...
Scene closes with programmer's workmates, each with coffee in hand, shaking their heads sadly as paramedics bear away a sheet-covered object on a stretcher.
My point: less harmful is not the same as harmless.
Ban Coffee (Score:3, Funny)
It makes exactly as much sense.
misparsing? (Score:4, Funny)
three times before I figured out that it didn't mean "a coffee can", because I was trying to figure out how to drink from multiple cans instead.
deadly donut (Score:4, Funny)
'The findings showed that the first cup had the most significant effect because caffeine levels in the blood had dropped during the night.'
There's a no-brainer. Drink a maintenance dose when you get up to pee in the middle of the night.
Re:Get your caffeine somewhere else! (Score:1, Funny)
We have labels that we are supposed to stick on pots of coffee that we make here at work. Time of day, type of coffee, that kind of thing. I find that the pots I most frequently brew and label have "tar" written on them.
Re:Shame (Score:1, Funny)
I dunno... (Score:2, Funny)
a good percentage will be adversely affected by
coffee LONG before they reproduce (and no, this
has nothing to do with the quantity of coffee they drink)
The coffee still tastes like shit fudge chocolatte (Score:1, Funny)
"But won't that take out some of the flavor"
"We wouldn't want that, now would we?"
"No sir, I think I'll post the results on slashdot. Everyone should know that the caffeine won't clog your arteries; the shit cake in the filter will."
That's correct, we should change the filter every month and only once to economize!"
"Right you are, CowBoyNeil"
"I'm glad we caught it too, Hemos, now go post it like it was somone else's study and not our own. I'll be back on Saturday, my roto-rooter operating will require me to recover on a hospital bed for about days. L8er."
"Goodbye, for great Allah. Bring Caffeine justice!"
Re:I take it... (Score:3, Funny)
Subtle plot (Score:2, Funny)