An anonymous reader writes "You open your eyes in the morning and go to the toilet. Raising the lid you see there is a snake. What would you do? Put the lid back? This is what the 73-year-old Polish citizen did when she saw a 6.5-foot-long reptile peering up out of her toilet."

crimeandpunishment writes "Move over Picasso....here comes 'Charlie bit me.' 125 YouTube videos are now on display at Guggenheim museums around the world. The videos, chosen from more than 23,000 submissions, are part of an exhibit called 'YouTube Play: A Biennial of Creative Video', featuring both well-known YouTube hits and barely-seen works by students. This group of videos will be narrowed down to about 20 entries, which will be featured at the Guggenheim in New York next month." We ran a story about this in June when museum officials started accepting submissions.

wen1454 writes "Some patrons drive from afar to eat at the restaurant and see the goats that have been going up on Al Johnson's roof since 1973. The restaurant 14 years ago trademarked the right to put goats on a roof to attract customers to a business.... So when a tourist spot 750 miles away decided to deploy a rooftop-caprine population, Mr. Johnson made a federal case of it. Last year, he discovered that Tiger Mountain Market in Rabun County, Ga., had been grazing goats on its grass roof since 2007. Putting goats on the roof wasn't illegal. The violation, Al Johnson's alleged in a lawsuit in the U.S. District Court for the Northern District of Georgia, was that Tiger Mountain used the animals to woo business."

jamie writes "Fantasy author Sir Terry Pratchett says he was so excited after being knighted by the Queen that he decided to make his own sword to equip himself for his new status... the author dug up 81kg of ore and smelted it in the grounds of his house, using a makeshift kiln built from clay and hay and fueled with damp sheep manure."

__roo writes "In a bizarre case of life imitates the Simpsons, New York City officials introduced a population of opossums into Brooklyn parks and under the boardwalk at Coney Island, apparently convinced that the opossums would eat all of the rats in the borough and then conveniently die of starvation. Several years later, the opossums have not only failed to eliminate the rat epidemic from New York City, but they have thrived, turning into a sharp-toothed, foul-odored epidemic of their own."

Ponca City, We Love You writes "The Guardian reports that Guy Consolmagno, curator of the pope's meteorite collection and a trained astronomer and planetary scientist, says he would be 'delighted' if intelligent life was found among the stars. 'But the odds of us finding it, of it being intelligent and us being able to communicate with it — when you add them up it's probably not a practical question.' Consolmagno adds that the traditional definition of a soul was to have intelligence, free will, freedom to love and freedom to make decisions. 'Any entity — no matter how many tentacles it has — has a soul.' Would he baptize an alien? 'Only if they asked.' Consolmagno dismisses the ideas of intelligent design as a pseudo-scientific version of creationism. 'The word has been hijacked by a narrow group of creationist fundamentalists in America to mean something it didn't originally mean at all. It's another form of the God of the gaps. It's bad theology in that it turns God once again into the pagan god of thunder and lightning.'"

caffiend666 writes "'A Kentucky man accused of strangling his wife is poised to claim excessive caffeine from sodas, energy drinks and diet pills left him so mentally unstable he couldn't have knowingly killed his wife, his lawyer has notified a court.' 'Dr. Roland Griffiths, a professor of behavioral biology at Johns Hopkins University has noted in an unrelated study that there is a diagnosis for "caffeine intoxication," which includes nervousness, excitement, insomnia and possibly rambling speech.' Personally, I just blame 'dark roasts.'"

Lev13than writes "In a direct retort to Glenn Beck's Restoring Honor rally, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert have announced competing rallies on October 30th. Stewart plans to host a 'Rally To Restore Sanity' on Oct. 30 on the National Mall in D.C. for the Americans he says are too busy living normal, rational lives to attend other political demonstrations. Colbert, meantime, will shepherd his fans in a 'March To Keep Fear Alive.' 'Damn your reasonableness!' Colbert said. 'Now is not the time to take it down a notch. Now is the time for all good men to freak out for freedom!' Stewart, meanwhile, has promised to provide attendees with signs featuring slogans such as 'I Disagree With You But I'm Pretty Sure You're Not Hitler' and 'I'm Afraid of Spiders.'"

jamie writes "Delaware Republican Senate nominee Christine O'Donnell claimed in 2007 that: 'American scientific companies are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains.' Current polls indicate that 39% of Delawareans plan to vote for her." If elected, O'Donnell and staff promise to do the same thing they do every night: try to take over the world.

An anonymous reader writes "Be careful mentioning Dr. Ann De Wees Allen. She's made it clear that she's trademarked her name and using it is 'illegal... without prior written permission.' She even lists out the names of offenders and shows you the cease-and-desist letter she sends them. And, especially don't copy any of the text on her website, because she's using a bit of javascript that will warn you 'Copyright Protect!' if you right click on a link."

We all know that god protects The Holy Father, but just in case, Pope Benedict XVI has a new hi-tech ride for his tour of the UK. The new "Popemobile" boasts: an air filtration system to protect against biological and chemical attacks, a bomb-proof undercarriage, 3-inch-thick explosive proof glass, and a top speed of 160mph. Made from a modified Mercedes-Benz M-Class 'green petrol' SUV, The Pope's new truck comes with a big pricetag: more than £200,000. I can't wait to find one of these in Fallout 4.

wenaway writes "Mark Zable, creator of Fried Beer, brought his creation to the State Fair in Texas. He walked away from the fair with the most creative award and is now gearing up for larger production. The Fried Beer is actually a pretzel dough ravioli injected with beer and then deep fried to perfection. What's next? Fried booze."

An anonymous reader writes "IBM, whose former patent boss is in charge of the USPTO these days, and which claims to support patent reform, has just been awarded a patent on choose-your-own-adventure style movies, despite plenty of prior art. Whatever happened to fixing the patent system, rather than continuing these mistakes?"

According to this article, the San Luis Obispo County Sheriff's Department knows that Pedobear is an Internet joke, but that hasn't stopped them from trying to warn the public about him. Their most recent tool in the fight against internet memes is this public safety information bulletin entitled: "An Introduction to PEDO BEAR." I look forward to the bulletin warning parents about the dangers of children playing in Chocolate Rain.

Universal Orlando isn't saying the guests on their Harry Potter rides are fatter than the usual amusement park visitor, but they are enlarging seats and restraints on the rides. The park has heard numerous complaints from guests too big to squeeze into some of the most popular rides. They have only adjusted a few rides for the extra tonnage so far but plan on updating them all soon.

An anonymous reader writes "A woman named Kimberly Shields was arrested after her identity was stolen, as police blamed the real Shields for the activities of the fake Shields. After being held in jail and strip searched, Shields finally pointed out that she looked different from the woman the police were after. She was kept in jail for 24 more hours and finally released. When she sued the police for this, rather than an apology, the lawyers for the police insisted she should thank the police for realizing the error and letting a judge know, rather than keeping her in jail."

An anonymous reader writes "Steve Jobs, while on a family vacation to Japan in July, picked himself up some Shuriken, otherwise known as Ninja throwing stars, as a souvenir. In his wisdom he decided to put them in his carry on luggage for the return journey. As it was a private plane he probably thought there would be no issue, but he was wrong. Even private plane passengers have to have all their baggage scanned, and the throwing stars were detected and deemed a hazard. It's alleged that Jobs argued that he could take them on the plane as no one could steal them on his private jet and use them. Security at the airport disagreed and demanded he remove the stars. Jobs, clearly angry at losing his throwing weapons, stated he would not be returning to the country." Undoubtedly this is part of the iNinja project.

There is some bad news for McNugget lovers. Thanks to a store closure in northeastern California, you can now be as far 115 miles from a McDonald's in the contiguous United States. The new "McFarthest" spot is in northwest Nevada, replacing the previous in South Dakota by eight heart-pounding, artery-clogged miles.

British teenager Luke Angel has been banned from the US for sending an email to the White House calling President Obama an obscenity. The 17-year-old says he was drunk when he sent the mail and doesn't understand what the big deal is. "I don't remember exactly what I wrote as I was drunk. But I think I called Barack Obama a p***k. It was silly -- the sort of thing you do when you're a teenager and have had a few," he said. The FBI contacted local police who in turn confronted Luke and let him know that the US Department of Homeland Security didn't think his email was funny. "The police came and took my picture and told me I was banned from America forever. I don't really care but my parents aren't very happy," Angel said.

destinyland writes "An Australian Parliament member has resigned after admitting he'd used government computers to access porn and gambling sites. McLeay 'gave an uncomfortable press conference outside Parliament House,' notes one technology site, 'during which he admitted he had acted in a standard not expected of cabinet ministers.' Paul McLeay was also the Minister for Mineral and Forest Resources as well as the Minister for Ports and Waterways. In resigning, he apologized to his constituents and parliamentary colleagues, as well as to his wife and family."