Everyone needs something to believe in.

Kodak should hire this guy to part of an advertising campaign.

nandemoari writes "A six-year-old who recently stole his parents' car and drove it into a utility pole has passed the buck onto a familiar scapegoat: the video game, Grand Theft Auto. Rockstar Games' controversial Grand Theft Auto video game has been criticized by parent groups and crusaders (or in the eyes of gamers, nincompoops) like former lawyer Jack Thompson for years (Thompson once tried to link the Virginia Tech slayings to late-night Counterstrike sessions. He's since been disbarred). However, not as of yet has anyone under the age of, oh, ten, blamed the game for a car theft."

Hugh Pickens writes "BBC reports that more people need to donate their brains to medical research if cures for diseases like dementia are to be found and are urging healthy people as well as those with brain disorders to become donors. 'For autism, we only have maybe 15 or 20 brains that have been donated that we can do our research on. That is drastically awful,' said Dr Payam Rezaie of the Neuropathology Research Laboratory at the Open University. 'We would need at least 100 cases to get meaningful data. A lot of research is being hindered by this restriction.' Part of the problem, according to Professor Margaret Esiri at the University of Oxford, may be that people are reluctant to donate their brains because they see the organ as the basis of their identity. 'It used to be other parts of the body that we thought were important,' says Esin. 'But now people realize that their brain is the crucial thing that gives them their mind and their self.' Dr Kieran Breen, of the Parkinson's Disease Society, said over 90% of the brains in their bank at Imperial College London were from patients, with the remaining 10% of 'healthy' brains donated by friends or relatives of patients. 'Some people are under the impression that if they sign up for a donor card that will include donating their brain for research. But it won't,' says Breen. 'Donor cards are about donating organs for transplant, not for medical science.'"

Richard Batista, 49, is suing his estranged wife, 44-year-old Dawnell Batista, for the return of a kidney he donated to her in 2001 or the sum of $1.5 million. After discovering that his wife had an affair with her physical therapist in 2003, Mr. Batista lost that loving feeling and now wants the organ back. "I saved her life and then to be betrayed like this is unfathomable. It's incomprehensible," he told the Post. "She engaged in an extramarital affair and refused to go to marital counseling and reconciliation."

It is estimated that a square yard of Mexico City sidewalk has 70 blobs of discarded gum, making it twice as gum filled as the bottom of an average 3rd grader's desk. To fight the problem authorities have used expensive sidewalk steam-cleaners, natural chewing gums that break down and now they are telling citizens to swallow it. "People just spit their gum out right on the sidewalk," marveled Paula Moran, a 32-year-old secretary. "It's ugly, and it's even worse when you step on it -- especially when it's still warm."

An anonymous reader writes "From the CNN Political Ticker: "Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry."" I guess these hard economic times are a bit too much to swallow for everyone.

It's been days since their last accident.

Even the house pets are bigger in Texas.

Anti-Globalism writes "A group of hippies is complaining that a recently installed WiFi mesh network in the UK village of Glastonbury is causing health problems. To combat the signals from the Wi-Fi hotspots, the hippies have placed orgone generators around the antennae." Although there have been many studies that show no correlation between WiFi and health issues the hippies say, "Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man."

A man whose home was so full of trash that he had to build an network of tunnels to get around may have died after getting lost in the maze. Officials think Gordon Stewart, 74, died as a result of dehydration, after becoming unable to find his way out of the network of carrier bags, boxes, old furniture and other junk. Neighbors had become concerned that they had not seen Mr Stewart for several days and raised the alarm. Officials had no comment on the Bog of Eternal Stench or the whereabouts of the Goblin King.

84-year-old Luba Relic has been banned from driving for the next 1000 years. Her license had been suspended by the RTA for "medical reasons," a court heard. But she crashed into a Honda Civic outside a St Vincent De Paul shop in Oxford Rd, Brookvale in September. Luba is no stranger to the court system. She has been to court with her neighbors 78 times and was charged this time with negligent driving, driving without a license and failing to give particulars. Will someone please get Luba a copy of Burnout, I think she'd be a natural.

They'll never take our irony!

It's cute until you have to change his litter box.

Garth Seehawer, 71, of Oconto Falls, has taken the coveted Top Lie of 2008 award given by The Burlington Liars Club. Four judges picked Seehawer's lie,"My grandson is the most persuasive liar I have ever met. By the time he was 2 years old he could dirty his diaper and make his mother believe someone else had done it," out of about 160 entries. "When you're the best in the world at something, sure, that's an honor," he said, insisting with a chuckle that his background as a lawyer gave him no advantage. "This will only hurt for a little while," came in a close second, with "I'd love to watch the Sex and the City movie with you," rounding out third.

An increasing number of childless women are taking fake babies to the park, out to eat, and even hosting birthday parties for them. Forty-nine-year-old Linda is married with no children of her own. Now, she says she feels like a mother because she has Reborns -- dolls made to look and feel like the real thing. Women interested in this "hobby" can spend a few hundred bucks to over a thousand on the faux infants. The owner of Reborn, Lachelle Moore, offers this unintentionally chilling line, "What's so wonderful about Reborns is that, um, they're forever babies."

You should see her catch a frisbee.

Badger, badger, badger, badger. Mushroom, mushroom! Snake!

CommonCents noted an Apple announcement a few hours before the anticipated keynote. He says "Apples' latest must have gadget does away with the keyboard. With the new MacBook Wheel, Apple has replaced the traditional keyboard with a giant wheel."

Thousands of shoes, boots, slippers, sandals, and even roller blades from sources unknown disrupted Miami traffic on Friday. No witnesses have come forward with information on the mountain of footwear and law enforcement officials say the person responsible for leaving behind the shoes will be charged for the clean up. I think we have just witnessed the beginning of the next M. Night Shyamalan movie.