Gerald Ford may have said, "There is no Soviet domination of Eastern Europe and there never will be under a Ford administration." But he was never stupid enough to make this.

bizwriter writes "This may seem like a joke, but it's not. The US Patent and Trademark Office will not accept patent filings faxed in if they arrive upside down. That's right, the home of innovation of the federal government is incapable of rotating an incoming fax file, whether electronically or on paper."

SilverTooth writes "Often, when watching a science documentary or reading an article, it seems that the scientists were executing a well-laid out plan that led to their discovery. Anyone familiar with the process of scientific discovery realizes that is a far cry from reality. Scientific discovery is fraught with false starts and blind alleys. As a result, labs accumulate vast amounts of valuable knowledge on what not to do, and what does not work. Trouble is, this knowledge is not shared using the usual method of scientific communication: the peer-reviewed article. It remains within the lab, or at the most shared informally among close colleagues. As it stands, the scientific culture discourages sharing negative results. Byte Size Biology reports on a forthcoming journal whose aim is to change this: the Journal of Serendipitous and Unexpected Results. Hopefully, scientists will be able to better share and learn more from each other's experience and mistakes."

FiReaNGeL writes "Could humans one day walk on walls, like Spider-Man? A palm-sized device invented at Cornell that uses water surface tension as an adhesive bond just might make it possible. The device consists of a flat plate patterned with holes, each on the order of microns (one-millionth of a meter). A bottom plate holds a liquid reservoir, and in the middle is another porous layer. An electric field applied by a common 9-volt battery pumps water through the device and causes droplets to squeeze through the top layer. The surface tension of the exposed droplets makes the device grip another surface — much the way two wet glass slides stick together. To turn the adhesion off, the electric field is simply reversed, and the water is pulled back through the pores, breaking the tiny 'bridges' created between the device and the other surface by the individual droplets."

astroengine writes "Assuming you had an interstellar spaceship, how would you navigate around the galaxy? For starters, you'd probably need a map. But there's billions of stars out there — how complex would that map need to be? Actually, Samuel Arbesman, a research fellow from Harvard, has come up with a fun solution. He created the 'Milky Way Transit Authority (MWTA),' a simple transit system in the style of the iconic London Underground 'Tube Map.' (Travel Tip: Don't spend too much time loitering around the station at Carina, there's some demolition work underway.)"

Whether you want to join with your sweetheart in a perfect union of physical beauty, or just give the cute neighbor a "Brazilian Coffee Filter," Mildred's Temple Kitchen would like you to do it in their bathroom this Valentine's Day weekend. The restaurant's website asks: "Have you given any thought to moving beyond the bedroom? Check out Mildred's Sexy Bathrooms throughout the weekend of Big Love." You get the picture.' Chef and co-owner Donna Dooher says, "We've always had little trysts in our bathrooms. We're taking it to the next level on Valentine's weekend."

theodp writes "'You have a lot of missing images, in the TV, in the news reporting,' explains billionaire Jimmy Lai. It's a gap that Lai's Next Media intends to fill with its animated news service. Artists lift details from news photos while actors in motion sensor suits re-create action sequences of stories making headlines. Animators graft cartoon avatars to the live-motion action, and the stories hit the Web. When news agencies didn't have footage of scenes from the Tiger Woods car crash, Lai's team raced to put together animation dramatizing the incident that became a YouTube sensation. Thus far, Lai has been denied a television license, but with or without his own station, he thinks his animations are headed for televisions worldwide. His company is currently in talks with media organizations to churn out news animations on demand using Next Media's graphic artists and software tools."

A new pseudoreality show, Bump, will follow three actresses pretending to have unwanted pregnancies, and whether or not they decide to get an abortion is up to the viewers. Executive producer Dominic Iocco said the idea for the show came after President Obama's commencement address at Note Dame University last year where he said he wanted, "to find ways to communicate about a workable solution to the problem of unintended pregnancies." I bet this is exactly what he had in mind.

According to a report in the British Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology, a 15-year-old girl without a vagina was impregnated via stabbing after performing oral sex on her boyfriend. The girl had been performing the sex act when an ex-lover appeared and stabbed her. She was taken to the hospital where two holes in her abdominal wall were flushed out and repaired. 278 days later the she was admitted again to hospital with abdominal pain. An examination revealed she was pregnant and that she had no vagina. Doctors theorized that spermatozoa gained access to the reproductive organs via the injured gastrointestinal tract.

A future Darwin Award winner was injured after his homemade rocket exploded during a sledding party. According to witnesses, the 62-year-old man built a "rocket" using a motorcycle muffler, a piece of pipe, gunpowder, match heads and gasoline. He strapped the device to his back, had a fellow party goer light his fuse, and went down the hill on a sled. Soon after its ignition the device exploded, sending its builder to a local hospital.

An anonymous reader writes "The Daily Mail describes an 'intricately designed Roman implement, which dates back to 200AD ... made from silver but has an iron blade. It features a spoon, fork as well as a retractable spike, spatula and small tooth-pick. Experts believe the spike may have been used by the Romans to extract meat from snails.' But is it a Roman Army Knife, or an Army Knife of Rome?"

Were you caught in a hellish Zeppelin accident? Are you the victim of a car stunt gone horribly wrong? Get the legal representation that you need.

Do you think Snuggies are for old ladies with too many cats or small shaking dogs? Think again. Now you too can wear something ridiculous while typing, talking on the phone, or just browsing your favorite website.

Someone finally made a mixed drink chart for that special didactic drinker in your life. Cocktail blueprints for engineers is the most precise way to get drunk you can find.

Instead of using my existing shark bite severity scale which ranges from "Stop hitting my leg!" to "Where did Rob go?", researchers at the University of Florida have created their own. Their new scale has a five-level of severity feature, which is similar to the burn severity scale. Lead researcher Ashley Lentz, M.D., a plastic and reconstructive surgery fellow at the UF College of Medicine, said, "If it's just an extremity and it's an abrasion, it's just a level I injury. If a shark comes up and takes a big bite out of a thigh and takes out the femoral artery, then that's a life-ending bite -- pretty quickly -- and you are talking about a level V injury."

Since there is a perfect blog post, it stands to reason that there would be a perfect news report.

Stuffed gut lovers rejoice! Haggis is about to return to the US. The daunting dish was banned out of health fears 21 years ago during the middle of the BSE (mad-cow disease) crisis. "It was a silly ban which meant a lot of people have never tasted the real thing," said Margaret Frost, of the Scottish American Society in Ohio. "We have had to put up with the US version, which is made from beef and is bloody awful."

e3m4n writes "The fictitious 'good samaritan' law from the final episode of Seinfeld (the one that landed them in jail for a year) appears to be headed toward reality for California residents after the house passed this bill. There are some differences, such as direct action is not required, but the concept of guilt by association for not doing the right thing is still on the face of the bill."

margaret writes "Now that hell has frozen over and the New Orleans Saints are amazingly good, the NFL has decided to start issuing cease and desist letters for use of the fleur-de-lis, a symbol dating back to the 12th century which has long been ubiquitous in Louisiana culture. Hell, it's on the official city flag, and Quebec's flag too — is the NFL going to go after the Canadians next?"

One of the best in the "Hitler Responds" series.