Iran Plans To Put a Monkey Into Space 153
arisvega writes "Iran plans to send a live monkey into space in the summer, the country's top space official said after the launch of the Rassad-1 satellite, state television reported on its website on Thursday. 'The Kavoshgar-5 rocket will be launched during the month of Mordad (July 23 to August 23) with a 285-kilogramme capsule carrying a monkey to an altitude of 120 kilometres (74 miles),' said Hamid Fazeli, head of Iran's Space Organisation. No mentioning on retrieving the monkey, though."
Sounds good (Score:2, Troll)
Oh, wait, you meant the OTHER kind of monkey. Oh, right. Go on then.
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You're going to find a lot of racists in this thread. Already very nearly every post is "ZOMG THE IRANIANS ARE MONKEYS LOL!"
Re:Yeah, Africa has about a billion monkeys, and t (Score:4, Insightful)
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...dehumanizing the victim makes things simpler
It's like breathing with a respirator
It eases the conscience of even the most conscious
and calculating violator
Words can reduce a person to an object,
something more easy to hate
An inanimate entity, completely disposable,
no problem to obliterate. [astraweb.com]
But death is the silence
in this language of violence
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Shall we remind them the 'monkeys' are winning...?
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You are going to find a lot of racists in America, period. Granted, most of them are too stupid to know how to use a computer, let alone be on slashdot...
Honestly, I was expecting more (or less) from /. (Score:2)
You know...
From self-deprecating humor like "I think of volunteering..." to movie/book references like Starship Troopers (Come on, you apes! You wanna live forever?) or Planet of the Apes...
I mean there's one of those coming up just around the corner.
Instead, the thread is full of "ZOMG THE IRANIANS ARE MONKEYS LOL!" as you've put it.
I mean... FFS... It's such a lame xenophobic approach, particularly since the first monkey in space was American. [wikipedia.org]
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>
Instead, the thread is full of "ZOMG THE IRANIANS ARE MONKEYS LOL!" as you've put it. I mean... FFS... It's such a lame xenophobic approach, particularly since the first monkey in space was American. [wikipedia.org]
Most I've seen so far are comments about two very specific Iranians being monkeys. Seeing how there seem to be quite a few Iranians who wouldn't mind seeing at least one of these two accompany the unfortunate animal, preferably strapped to the outside of the rocket, I wouldn't call it racism. Or is it racism against Americans to call Bush Jr. an idiot?
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Just a handful of trolls. They're probably not even really racist, it's just to stir up nerd rage.
I didn't know that... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:I didn't know that... (Score:5, Funny)
That's such an offensive thing to say. I demand you apologize to the monkeys!
Re:I didn't know that... (Score:5, Funny)
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Oh yes! Him and George Bush Jr trained together for the space missions back in '82.
I misread as Ham (the first chimp in space) and Bush trained for space missions...
You're a little late to the party, Iran. (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:You're a little late to the party, Iran. (Score:5, Insightful)
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Yep, the entire space race was about showing off our ICBM technology. All the early rockets were developed with nuclear warheads in mind.
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In mind? BOTH, Atlas and R5 were developed for ICBM use. It just happened that they could also carry some other payload into orbit, and whether that's a human being or a nuclear bomb, does the rocket care as long as mass is roughly similar?
The whole manned space program (at least 'til Kennedy decided to up the ante) was just to test (and show the other side) how much mass they could send into orbit. And it's more agreeable to population, UN and whoever else might be looking if you put men up there instead o
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The Russians wanted to put men in space for military purposes. It was thought they could spy on earth better than an automated satellite, and the put up serveral military space stations for that purpose. Most of them failed and eventually they abandoned the idea.
The Germans had plans for sub-orbital bombers to hit the USA but never got them past early prototypes.
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does the rocket care as long as mass is roughly similar?
It does not, but the developing team does. Different payloads place different acceleration limits.
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And back then no humans had gone into space so it made sense to send animals first. Now that people are living in space long term there is no way Iran can justify sending an animal. If they want to measure acceleration, temperature, vibration, life support, etc, then they can do that with instruments.
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Mmhmmm.... if the US or the USSR... sorry, Russia, are willing to share their insights with them. If they are not, and at least with the US it seems highly unlikely, it makes a lot of sense to send some creatures up there to check whether they can handle certain conditions before you try it with a human.
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I really just meant the general idea that living things had never been beyond the atmosphere and it would have been hard to convince some people to change their thinking enough to accept the idea. A bit like how when the first trains were built which could do 20, 30 miles per hour, some people believed that it would be impossible for humans to live while doing that. The Iranians know that people live in space. The details (like how much air do they need, how much acceleration can they take) are well underst
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Somehow I don't think that anyone is going to lend them that technology, so they have to build and test their own.
Live astronauts (Score:1)
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You think the USSR didn't have other problems to worry about but to send various manned space stations into space in the 70s?
Don't think prestige projects are only done if you have no other worries. Actually, history shows me at least that the most harebrained prestige projects were done in times when the money would really have been better invested in other, more important things.
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Well, I'm sure the next election result will reflect the populace's conscerns!
Simian munitions mount (Score:4, Funny)
They don't mention the type of warhead the monkey will have in his arms.
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Kegs?
They are just asking the USA to back off... (Score:2)
The USA and allies invaded a neighbouring country recently (Iraq). They are just warning the USA etc off thinking of invading them, just wanting to remind potential invaders that they've got the ability to drop a bomb (maybe nuclear) anywhere else on the planet if they need to.
What would the USA do if a country it didn't like had successfully invaded Mexico or Canada and was sitting just off its borders?
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This is how you signal ICBM capability (Score:5, Insightful)
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I thought Laika was to determine if something "alive" could survive the trip into space through the EM belts?
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Laika was sent up for science. It was funded for propaganda.
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You're thinking of the Van Allen radiation belt. The existence of which was not even confirmed until sometime in 1958, the year after Laika was sent into space.
Re:This is how you signal ICBM capability (Score:4, Interesting)
In one novel, they were imagining that so far from Earth, human minds can not hold. Various craziness appearing. The only way to travel would be to be in a form of coma, half dead.
It is right, they did not know many things about how it was, but their imagination was working at full speed and they surely expected unexpected things. Sending a mammal to be sure that it doesn't get instantly fried by some then unknown effects was a really reasonable step.
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In one novel, they were imagining that so far from Earth, human minds can not hold. Various craziness appearing. The only way to travel would be to be in a form of coma, half dead.
Wow. They had commercial air travel nailed way back then.
Impressive.
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Yes, and your point is what? The US already has that kind of technology. The US should disarm it's missiles to avoid a cold war. Makes sense, right?
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And they would want to signal this because...?
Iran has already stated it wants to obliterate the "large devil" (US) and the "small devil" (Israel). Why should they signal anything if they're serious about it? Are they just playing the ol' "somebody please hold me down before I hurt someone" game.
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They can test it in some remote corner of the Pacific or up in space, try to cover their tracks and deny the whole thing (or put the blame on the Israelis, as they like to do). More likely, as they want everyone to know about it, they will probably boast their successful nuclear blast.
BTW, the "don't fuck with" club members are assertive about their membership but are very sensible and wouldn't actually dare to use their capabilities unless they will be very hard pressed against the wall. The Iranian govern
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Maybe they're just trying to say: "My ICBM is larger than yours..." or "Hey babe, check out my ICBM. I don't have a diamond on its tip, I've got a monkey!"
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Those living in glass houses should not cast stones... (Someone from USA accusing others of religious zealotry?!)
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Those living in glass houses should not cast stones... (Someone from USA accusing others of religious zealotry?!)
Not everyone in the US is a religious zealot. It's just that the zealots are well-funded, loud, annoying, and all over the airwaves.
Besides, it's the religious zealots who insist on supporting Israel in *absolutely everything* they do, even if it insane or completely against our interests. This is all because their bizarre interpretation of Revelations and various Old Testament prophets.
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Congratulations, you've shown yourself to be retarded.
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herding Palestinians into ghettos and slaughtering them
Which is why all the surrounding Arab nations welcome the Palestinian refugees with open arms and... oh... wait. Nevermind.
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Let me guess, if I will research more about it, it will end up like any other radio Yerevan news?
Anyone can send a monkey up (Score:2)
The question is, can you get it down alive?
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So ICBM research? (Score:2)
Thats all heavy lift like that is at that point, testing ICBMs and throw-weight under the cover of "civilian" or "scientific" research.
What about Mrs. Monkey? (Score:1)
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Females in space? In Iran? Think again.
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It is a MONKEY they are sending. Clearly it is Ahmadinejad and not Khamenei.
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Iranutangs are apes, strictly speaking.
...all us Europeans are wondering... (Score:2, Funny)
...how they kidnapped George W. Bush in the first place.
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One way trip into space for a heavy capsule. ICBM (Score:2)
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Nuclear warheads do not require precise accuracy to be effective.
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... but not planning to recover the capsule ...
So does the monkey get to die of thirst or suffocate?
Nice.
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The Laika (Sputnik 2) experiment says that the monkey will die of overheat.
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So? The US and Russia both have a lot of nukes, and they're by some margin more precise than whatever Iran could test.
What did he do? (Score:2)
I don't understand... (Score:1)
Did Microsoft's board contract with Iran to launch Ballmer?
Very smart monkey (Score:2)
Seems risky (Score:1)
this would be a good time for the USAF (Score:2)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boeing_YAL-1 [wikipedia.org]
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Oh yeah? (Score:2)
I hope Iran upgraded Photoshop to support the features required this time.
Jacket? (Score:2)
Machmud, we hardly knew ya (Score:2)
It's about time Achmedinejad got his first space flight.
Hasta la vista, baby.
E
This could backfire big time (Score:2)
.
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When I worked in the electricity industry, I had to call various companies and ask how their meter readers had got a six-digit read off a five-digit meter, whether they really thought an irrigation pump could have burned 999,999kWh in a month, etc.
One of these companies was so dreadful that we just called them "the chimps". (Scary part is, they weren't the worst.) Imagine how hard it was to keep a straight face the day a bloke called Simeon answered the phone...
But will it survive? (Score:2)
Sending something into space isn't the biggest problem, it is keeping it intact and getting it back in one piece that is where the biggest challenge is.
Why? (Score:1)
Just sounds like little kids sticking firecrackers in frogs or something.
poor little monkey (Score:2)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_Gone_to_Heaven [wikipedia.org]
This just in: (Score:1)
Next year Iran is expected to unveil something they call a "wheel".
Iran is sending its President into space? (Score:1)
Allahu akbar! (Score:2)
Helpless creature... (Score:2)
You know, for useless acts of war they have no problems sacrificing themselves, over nothing, yet for an important discovery or monumental action like going into space, they can't be bothered to use their own species, they have to send in a monkey....please tell me why they can't send a human up, everyone has done so already, why send a defenseless creature up in space.....oh yeah....their f*cken scared stiff of their own technology!
1959 called... (Score:1)
...and it wants its headlines back. I mean seriously, there's so much junk up there it's like an orbital junkyard. This is not stuff that launched itself up there. It was carried. On rockets. The type we've been flinging into space for over half a century. But now it's news because Iran decides it wants to doom a few rhesus monkeys in an experiment that consists of 5 steps:
1) Build rocket ...profit?
2) Strap monkey into chair
3) Put chair into rocket
4) Fling into space
5)
Nothing to see here.
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A true leader, he takes his people onto the next level!
Too bad Georgie wasn't that much of a monkey. I would have voted for the funding, and I bet a lot of people would have so too, if NASA had only promised to pull a Columbia on reentry.
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Why not? Are they on the export restriction list now, too?
Fuck, may we at least sell some kind of crap to Iran without the US starting to stir up a stink?
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Whoa, whoa, what pooped into your breakfast cereal?
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Either a monkey an Iranian.