Researchers Study Mystery of the Toddler Who Won't Grow 252
kkleiner writes "Twenty-year-old Brooke Greenberg hasn't grown since age five. For the last 15 years, mystified doctors have been unable to explain the cause for Brooke's disorder that has kept her aging in check. At age twenty, she maintains the physical and mental appearance of a toddler. The researchers are now are painstakingly analyzing Brooke’s entire genome in search of unique mutations. Needless to say, it is a formidable undertaking. 'Cracking the code on Brooke’s condition,' [Dr. Eric Shadt] wrote, 'is the proverbial searching for a needle in a haystack, since likely there is one or a small number of letters changed in Brooke’s genome that has caused her condition.' To find the mutation Shadt and his team are using the latest genome sequencing and analysis tools. The strategy is to compare Brooke’s genome to the genomes of her parents and three normal sisters, as well as to other available sequences from the general population, and identify gene mutations that only Brooke has."
4chan (Score:5, Funny)
4chan is going to love this one.
Re:4chan (Score:4, Funny)
think of the possible implications! (Score:5, Funny)
Perpetual kittens.
Obligatory Star Trek reference (Score:3, Funny)
The Grups are studying her intensely.
BANG BANG
Bioshock? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:4chan (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Mental appearance? (Score:5, Funny)
opp opp OPPAN JUNGIAN STYLE
Re:Perpetual diaper changes (Score:5, Funny)
A normal five year old can use the toilet. Not everyone developed as slowly as you.
Re:think of the possible implications! (Score:4, Funny)
Perpetual kittens.
Normally, I'm against screwing around too much with nature. But goddamn that would be worth it!
Balok's Love-Child (Score:5, Funny)
The kid's the product of a tranya fueled dalliance by her mom after a night out with Balok on his spaceship.
Re:4chan (Score:5, Funny)
4chan is going to love this one.
A 20-year-old with the mental makeup of a 5-year-old? I'm guessing she'd fit right in on 4chan.
Re:Mental appearance? (Score:5, Funny)
Heeeeeeey psych. class ladies!
Re:Wouldn't They See That in the Endocrine System? (Score:3, Funny)
Her condition may not be exactly "horrible". It's hard to know what she thinks of not being an adult.
When I was 5, I though girls were icky. Continuing to be able to think that might have saved me a lot of time and money.
Re:Epigenetics (Score:4, Funny)
It sounds like they have a small problem on their hands!
I'll bet you're real fun at parties.
Re:Human not freak show (Score:5, Funny)
Re:think of the possible implications! (Score:5, Funny)
You're code must be awesome to look at.
It's easier to read than your prose ;)
Re:4chan (Score:5, Funny)
However, it does mean she'll fit right in with the rest of the 4chan posters.
Re:think of the possible implications! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:think of the possible implications! (Score:5, Funny)
Which would be better, I think.
As a kitten, my cat was entirely too curious/fearless and once spent about 30 seconds inside a dryer before I figured out that "thump-whump-meow" is not the normal operation of said dryer, and also that my cat was missing. (Fortunately, aside from a slightly warm bum, the faint scent of fabric softener, and an 8-month-long fear of large white appliances, he was fine).
Re:brain damage? (Score:4, Funny)
It may very well be a regulatory molecule that we don't know about and can't measure.
It may be due to molecules that are made up entirely of tachyons. Our normal aging is because there is a slight imbalance between our normal matter and tachyon physicality, leading to a slight shift towards what we view as "positive time".
Her condition comes from an almost exact balance between the two, thus a competition between normal matter aging in the normal direction and the FTL matter aging in reverse.
The Orkans (Mork and Mearth being the earthbound representatives) have the balance the other way, thus they age backwards.
It's all easy if you know science.
Re:Mental appearance? (Score:2, Funny)
*cowboy hero-archetype dance*