How To Deflect an Asteroid With Today's Technology

Matt_dk writes "Apollo 9 astronaut Rusty Schweickart is among an international group of people championing the need for the human race to prepare for what will certainly happen one day: an asteroid threat to Earth. Schweickart said the technology is available today to send a mission to an asteroid in an attempt to move it, or change its orbit so that an asteroid that threatens to hit Earth will pass by harmlessly. But what would such a mission entail?"

Let's get this over with.

[Anonymous Coward]

Bruce Willis.

Spoiler alert

[srussia]

Bruce Willis died deflecting the last one. It'll have to be Ben Affleck next time... finally.

Re:Beck and Limbaugh

[adamstew]

I see where you're going: Load up Rush Limbaugh in to Glen Beck's huge mouth. The pressure from all the hot air being unable to escape will build up. Very quickly that hot air will blast Rush Limbaugh in to space to impact the asteroid. This collision will be enough to deflect the asteroid back out towards space.

Re:The best defense

[jpolonsk]

Would you like to know more?

Re:Nukes

[jpolonsk]

What, the movies have lied to me? Next you'll be telling me that you can't enhance a photo so many times that you get more information from a reflection in it then was originally taken.

Re:The cost...

[Thud457]

None of them want to pay taxes again. Ever.

I don't think a spaceshipload of teabaggers is going to be the right choice skillset-wise for effectively deflecting an asteroid. Can't we just put them on the B-Ark and fly them into the Sun?

wouldnt it be easier to...

[Rivalz]

I think we are looking at this the wrong way. We should instead be trying to turn the moon into our own deathstar. That way we can change its orbital position to deflect or intercept the asteroid. That way we get multiple uses out of it and can also rule the solar system once our deathstar becomes fully operational. How hard would it be to put enough rockets on the moon to be able to drive it around... Seriously NASA WTF are you guys doing trying to land a little rocket on a asteroid when you could be asking for funding to drive the Moon.

The solution is

[Anonymous Coward]

Simple. Change the gravitational constant of the universe.

Re:It all depends on detection...

[Anonymous Coward]

Sorry but I'm much more interested in how an asteroid can be deflected INTO the earth, especially when I'm sitting in traffic.

Re:It all depends on detection...

[oldspewey]

a small impact could still devastate a city, and we could actually deflect it.

... to a neighbouring city, preferably one with a hated sports franchise.

Re:Let's get this over with.

[Fozzyuw]

You're over thinking this. All you need is a wedge shaped ship that shoots square bullets.

Re:Spoiler alert

[SETIGuy]

She reads your slashdot posts, doesn't she.

Re:Spoiler alert

[McPierce]

I, for one, would like to throw my support towards any effort that results in Ben Affleck being shot at an asteroid.

His plan won't work

[Bemopolis]

He forgot to account for the Congressional hearings, where conservatives will deny the existence of "these so-called space rocks" (they aren't, after all, mentioned in the Bible), and just a ploy to rake in more moolah for Big Astronomy. Not to mention the flurry of state AG witchhunts into the astronomers' emails.

On the other hand, if one of the scientists said that there was a possibility that the asteroid had a diamond core, a private sector solution would no doubt be undertaken by DeBeers.

Practice, Practice, Practice

[uzd4ce]

Ok, what we really need to do is create a simulator for a small craft to destroy the asteroid while said craft and means of deployment is being developed. Something using vector graphics should be quick and easy to come up with on the simulator side. The craft should be maneuverable and have a cannon capable of breaking the large asteroid into smaller and smaller chunks until these chunks can be destroyed by the cannon. Incidentally, the cannon should also be able to defend against alien craft in case of their interference. High scorers can be recruited to pilot the craft to save the earth.