High Fructose Corn Syrup To Get a Makeover

An anonymous reader writes "With its sweetener linked to obesity, some cancers and diabetes, the Corn Refiners Association (CRA) doesn't want you to think 'fructose' when you see high fructose corn syrup in your soda, ketchup or pickles. Instead, the AP reports, the CRA submitted an application to the FDA, hoping to change the name of their top-selling product to 'corn sugar.'"

Real sugar soda

[w00tsauce]

Kinda off topic, but is anyone else enjoying the "real-sugar" sodas that are in supermarkets? Man so delicious, I stocked up on it. I wish this was sold all the time.

Re:So....

[sjames]

Nonsense, from now on, cigarettes will have pictures of balloons on the brightly colored packages and they'll be known as FunStix. PCBs will be yum-yums and DDT will be freedom spray. Melamine shall be known as "Baby Formula"...OH Wait!

Re:What the hell?

[value_added]

What's in a name?

Well, would you be inclined buy something accurately labelled as "soy juice", or would you buy "soy milk" instead? Personally, I prefer moo cow fuck milk [youtube.com] for both the honesty and the wholesome goodness, with the added benefit of not spending my time reading manufacturer labels.

Re:Evil stuff

[nschubach]

You want the "Corn Refiners" to stop refining corn?

Re:Not the first time

[russotto]

...and won't be the last. "Confectioners' glaze" (common candy coating) sounds so much better than "lac bug secretion"

Shellac, what can't it do? It really IS a floor wax and a dessert topping.

"Gelatin" sounds so much better than "pig skin extract"

Well, gelatin can have many sources, not just pig and not just skin.

In related news...

[MikeV]

The Texas Rancher's Association has applied to their board of regents in hopes of changing the name of "Cow Patties" to "Cow Flowers" in hopes that people will think their bovine droppings smells good. No input yet from the manure retail industry but word is they're gearing up to put pictures of flowers on their bags to help enhance the new aroma.

Re:What the hell?

[Sulphur]

I say we petition the government to outlaw glucose as well. ;)

And while you are at it, outlaw livers (glucose pushers) as well.

my vote for renaming HFCS

[Lost Penguin]

Unicorn sweetener.

Re:What the hell?

[tabrnaker]

Nearly the same isn't the same, so doesn't exist in nature. However, if you've ever done the master cleanse with sugar cane juice, maple syrup, and honey, you can see that the body seems to react to honey similarly.

Re:What the hell?

[larry bagina]

I thought the KFC rename was due to "Kentucky" stigma

Re:What the hell?

[Anonymous Coward]

In other news, 2/3 Princeton chicks are cute. The other 1/3rd don't mind their own research.

Re:Evil stuff

[dangitman]

I was at a luncheon fundraiser in DC for a congressman from a midwestern, corn-raising state and was seated across from a sugar lobbyist, and in between a guy from Raytheon and a guy from Microsoft. The sugar lobbyist was the biggest asshole of the three, too.

Well, you know what they say. In America, First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

Needs a new ad campaign

[syousef]

And here thought that fraud and false advertising was illegal in this country. If the Feds go for this then they're not doing their jobs.

I'm propose a new ad campaign along the lines of "Got Milk!?". In this case it would be "Get fruct!!!!"