The Proton Just Got Smaller 289
inflame writes "A new paper published in Nature has said that the proton may be smaller than we previously thought. The article states 'The difference is so infinitesimal that it might defy belief that anyone, even physicists, would care. But the new measurements could mean that there is a gap in existing theories of quantum mechanics. "It's a very serious discrepancy," says Ingo Sick, a physicist at the University of Basel in Switzerland, who has tried to reconcile the finding with four decades of previous measurements. "There is really something seriously wrong someplace."' Would this indicate new physics if proven?"
Pluto is not a planet anymore... (Score:4, Funny)
... and now this! These scientists have no shame!
Negative (Score:4, Funny)
Ingo Sick (Score:1, Funny)
I think I'm going to name all of my children 'Ingo Sick'. What an awesome name.
Poor Protons (Score:5, Funny)
Just remember, dear protons:
Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is Physics, and a powerful ally it is.
"There is really something seriously wrong...." (Score:3, Funny)
Have they tried re-doing the math in Base 13?
Re:Negative (Score:5, Funny)
two hydrogen pals are sitting on the curb, sipping from their 40s. One says to the other "I think I've lost an electron". The other says "Are you sure"? To which the first replies, "Yeah, I'm positive".
Re:Ingo Sick (Score:5, Funny)
People will be mad (Score:2, Funny)
A hellaphysicist will be pretty mad is the proton is a hellometer smaller.
Stupid marketers (Score:2, Funny)
>> The Proton Just Got Smaller
The price is the same, the box is the same, but now there's less proton.
see... (Score:5, Funny)
this is why i never listen to scientist.
they're always lying, and making me pissed.
fucking protons, how do they work?
will they reimburse for the loss? (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Negative (Score:4, Funny)
Only on the surface. When you get down to the core, it's actually positive.
Honey... (Score:5, Funny)
All My Work is Ruined (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Pluto is not a planet anymore... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Ummm... (Score:4, Funny)
...determine if a 1kg change is significant (weight of a bowling ball), insignificant (weight of the earth), of wildly significant (weight of a swallow)...
It could just be the difference between a laden and an unladen swallow.
Re:Ummm... (Score:4, Funny)
Excellent point. What this means is that when I go out to buy a liter of protons, I'm getting, like, 4% fewer than it says on the label, right?
(Of course, Google wouldn't convert protons to liters, so I have a feeling I'm doing this wrong.)
Missed opportunity: (Score:5, Funny)
"For my ally is the Strong Nuclear Force, and a powerful ally it is."
Re:Ummm... (Score:4, Funny)
Thanks, I got mixed up. That means this [chinatopsupplier.com] is 4% more awesome than I thought! Woohoo!
Re:Paging Dr. Superbrain (Score:3, Funny)
There's never a theoretical particle physicist when you need one. (Never thought I'd say that phrase)
Theoretical physicist? I'd prefer the question be answered by an ACTUAL physicist. B-)
(And if I weren't on a slow dialup link right now I'd hunt up the issue of "nukees" - a web comic written and drawn by an actual nuclear engineering PhD - where the new berkeley student opens the door to the "Theoretical physics conference room" and finds it opens into thin air about three stories up.)
Re:Negative (Score:2, Funny)
Hello! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Ummm... (Score:3, Funny)
Your Mom's so fat that she lost 4% of her weight and nobody cared.
Re:Pluto is not a planet anymore... (Score:5, Funny)
Does this mean we'll have to start referring to the proton as a "dwarf particle"?
Re:Negative (Score:3, Funny)
A neutron walks in and asks for a drink.
The bartender hands it to him and the neutron asks "How much?"
"For you?" the bartender replies, "No charge."
(Yes, I've played Fallout 3, too :)
Re:Pluto is not a planet anymore... (Score:2, Funny)
Sorry to be spoilsport, I like the thought experiment, but I'm really going to need a shape complex enough that the math falls into the "I know I don't know how to solve this" category so I can stop feeling uncomfortable with the duk/dA, where uk is known unknowns.
That's okay, just pretend that my rectangle is an infinite 6-dimensional sphere and that the circle is a finite 6-dimensional Calabi-Yau manifold [wikipedia.org]. Does that make you less uncomfortable?
Re:see... (Score:5, Funny)
Homogeneous marriages are not legal in most states. Besides, it's just plain repulsive.
A daddy proton and a mommy electron get married...
Upgrades (Score:3, Funny)
God here. I just upgraded the universe server to PhysicsOS 1.1. Some users may notice a change in proton size due to the new quantum mechanics engine, but unless your working with the OS directly, this shouldn't be a problem for you.