Neanderthals "Had Sex" With Modern Man 536
According to Professor Svante Paabo, director of genetics at the Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology, Neanderthals and modern humans had sex across the species barrier. The professor has been using DNA retrieved from fossils to piece together the entire Neanderthal genome, and plans on publishing his findings soon. He recently told a conference that he was sure the two species had had sex, but still had questions as to how "productive" the relations had been. "What I'm really interested in is, did we have children back then and did those children contribute to our variation today?" he said. "I'm sure that they had sex, but did it give offspring that contributed to us? We will be able to answer quite rigorously with the new [Neanderthal genome] sequence." What remains a mystery is what Paleolithic brewery provided the catalyst for these stone age hook-ups.
humans (Score:5, Funny)
Humans... so easy, a caveman can do them.
Of course they did (Score:5, Funny)
Developers, developers, developers...
Neanderthals "Had Sex" With Modern Man.... (Score:5, Funny)
...and later went on to form the first government - which has been screwing modern man ever since.
We can finally explain wherefore Celtic people are (Score:3, Funny)
At last we can explain wherefore Celtic people are who they are!
(*Dodges tossed caber*)
Case closed. (Score:0, Funny)
Ever been to a frat party?
Beer! (Score:5, Funny)
Helping ugly people have sex since 30,000 BCE!!!
Neanderthals Had Sex With Modern Humans (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Scientific? (Score:1, Funny)
Pics or it didn't happen (Score:2, Funny)
Cave drawings will do.
Re:Most likely (Score:4, Funny)
I'm not condoning this, just pointing out the obvious.
Thanks for stressing you're anti-rape. With slashdotters, you can't be sure. So many of us spend so much time on the longboats, our long beards matted from all the clotted blood of our enemies. It's easy to forget that when you come home and hang up the horned helmet for a nice relaxing night of using the Core 2 Quad you got as danegeld, that 'no means no'.
(Sorry, couldn't resist.)
Re:Proclivities (Score:2, Funny)
New slashdot poll (Score:5, Funny)
Re:This is important (Score:3, Funny)
Man, so the message is clear: we will have to fuck those nasty aliens when they show up to get that "hybrid vigor" on a galactic scale.
So that was Jim Kirk's motivation!
Re:Genesis 6 (Score:3, Funny)
Cool story, bro.
Re:humans (Score:3, Funny)
Damn... now you've given them ideas... (shudder) Neanderthal porn!
Re:This is important (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Scientific? (Score:4, Funny)
Its been used to trace most human ancestors to a couple places in Africa, almost to a couple of individual females.
Two questions:
1. If it was two females, how did they reproduce?
2. Do you have any pictures? (Maybe an artist's interpretation? :)
Re:We can finally explain wherefore Celtic people (Score:1, Funny)
At last we can explain wherefore Celtic people are who they are!
Darn right. When I'm naked, I kind of look a little too much like a 6'5" orangutan/caveman hybrid for it to be coincidence.
Re:This is important (Score:5, Funny)
So they could be on TV
Re:Scientific? (Score:5, Funny)
I'm sure every scientist, and probably everyone else as well, has committed similar sins at some point.
What evidence do you have to support that statement?
If the Neanderthals had sex with mankind! (Score:1, Funny)
there's nothing holding me back, I just have to leave my apartment :)
Re:humans (Score:3, Funny)
sorry cannot resist (Score:2, Funny)
Your mother is so old that the Neanderthals had sex with her!
Cave paintings or it didn't happen. (Score:5, Funny)
ObFamilyGuy (Score:2, Funny)
Gary: "Oh, yeah? Maybe if you did that more often, maybe I wouldn't need these paintings!"
Of course there is evidence (Score:3, Funny)
You've seen Gérard Depardieu haven't you?
Re:humans (Score:5, Funny)
Neanderthal porn has to be better than so really weird Asian pron I have ...... heard of.
Re:humans (Score:5, Funny)
Damn... now you've given them ideas... (shudder) Neanderthal porn!
I believe that's Rule 35 [wetriffs.com]: if it doesn't exist on the internet, it must be created.
Re:humans (Score:2, Funny)
No, Actually it was ancient human geeks, finding Neanderthal cave women living underground, in caves (the ancient version of the modern mom's basement). Geeks, desperate to have sex with anything, mated with the females. As we all know, most geek breeding is non-productive (premature ejaculation), so almost no 'children" resulted. Can you imagine, kids that looked worse than geeks?
Re:Why wouldn't they? We sure would. (Score:1, Funny)
Have you been in a Wal-mart? People will hump anything with a hole.
Remind me not to go shopping with you.
Re:humans (Score:5, Funny)
I'll just leave this right here to get the ball rolling:
http://motivateurself.files.wordpress.com/2008/05/rule34-3.jpg [wordpress.com]
Re:Most likely (Score:2, Funny)
In my experience, "no" means "eat me out first".
Just sayin'
Re:humans (Score:3, Funny)
Consider a car travelling at 100km/h compared to a STOL personal air vehicle landing at 100km/h. Which one is closest to obstacles?
There's not nearly enough information in your question to answer it. Is the car driving in the middle of a desert? Is the air vehicle landing in a shopping mall?
Re:humans (Score:5, Funny)
Please stop that right now, they are still here. They have just assimilated into our society.
Go onto any construction site, and you can see them plain as day.
Many have even gotten jobs in civil service. The US Congress is full of them.
Re:Isn't (Score:3, Funny)
Re:humans (Score:4, Funny)
And on that note, it sheds a whole new light to the "messing with sasquatch" campaign as well.
Re:We can finally explain wherefore Celtic people (Score:3, Funny)
Someone, I don't know who, once said that "if you took a Neanderthal, cleaned him up, dressed him in modern clothes and put him on a New York subway car, no one would look twice."
Someone else responded to that with "that says more about the New York subway system than it does about Neanderthals."
Re:Isn't (Score:1, Funny)
Well I guess it's better than Ubuntu 9.10 Horny Homoerectus
Re:humans (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Cave paintings or it didn't happen. (Score:4, Funny)
Cave paintings or it didn't happen.
Cave paintings with timestamp or it didn't happen.
Re:humans (Score:1, Funny)
The neanderthal never got to Scotland dude. They only just made it into the south of england, the rest was covered in ice. And hairy guys are not the norm in northern Europe. In southern Europe yes, and that's where the last neanderthals were. And you just have to look at the body hair on a spanish guy on the beach to know his granma got jiggedy with a big, silent, hairy type.
Re:We can finally explain wherefore Celtic people (Score:3, Funny)
INSIGHTFUL MY ACHING ASS! speaking as a Scotsman i find this funny as hell. you see celts were not just Scotland ,Wales and Ireland........... they were pretty much ALL OVER EUROPE. Celts were a culture and not a race... there were Celts all over the place INCLUDING ENGLAND!!!! oh and Germany.. and Switzerland and France or and spain.....remember the OstroGoths?Visigoths?..erm.. celts..... the celts even sacked Rome...... this is where Milan gets it's name from....
yeah.. right next door to England isn't it? and as far as a plague.. well oe third of the roman empire was humped by the plague... however you will find that the SCots and Irisg celts by the VERY nature of them being OUTWITH the roman empire..remember the Scots kicked the crap out the Romans on more than one occassion. and the Irish were prtty much unscathed due to no real expiditionary force from the Romans altough thre was some trade(ie slaves) between the Romans and Irish .Decimation whilst having a roman root isn't even the right wird..lol decimation means 1 out of ten killed. it was , for exa,mple when a legion fucked up they got 1 out of every ten men and killed then as a lesson to the rest not to fuck up again. Or if a p[eople rebelled the same would happen to that population locally as a lesson to the rest. 1/3 != 1 out of ten.
there were walls built to seperate the Scots tribes from Roman britain.. thus the plague very much kinda skipped the Scots and Irish on that occassion.
i could go on and show you how amazingly wrong you are in yer wee statement but tbh i cannot bothered.
i mean did you really believe what you said or just enjoy making shit up?
That was the most insightful, drunken, Scottish post ever.