What Happened Before the Big Bang? 394
The Bad Astronomer writes to tell us that a recent advance in Loop Quantum Gravity theory appears to allow the mathematics of cosmology to be extended to the time before the Universe underwent the Big Bang. Bad Astronomer also attempts to simplify things a bit with his own explanation of the new discovery.
Easy (Score:5, Funny)
Come on, what do you think, the universe is a whore?
Well, the last thing said before was... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Easy (Score:1, Funny)
There was the sound of God asking for my zippo (Score:2, Funny)
Everyone knows.... (Score:4, Funny)
The punchline (Score:5, Funny)
As a science-loving person, I almost fell in ecstasy by just reading this sentence. It really gets things straight regarding religious fanboyism. So "eat that, Intelligent Design".
Ahh... saying that felt so good.
You mean... (Score:5, Funny)
"What Happened 6001 Years Ago?"
Fixed that for you.
Re:I'll tell you what happened (Score:3, Funny)
I thought Greedo posted first! You know, maybe it's the Big Bang special edition
Re:There was the sound of God asking for my zippo (Score:2, Funny)
No Before (Score:2, Funny)
There is no "before".
There has to be a big bang to have a "before big bang".
Now, 6000 years ago, roughly, God spoke and the Universe lept into being.
All you techno-geeks need to accept that. Put away your computers. I have. I stopped using computers because they are the "Beast" (Beast is a Trademark of the RMS Corporation, a wholly, and holy, owned subsidary of FOSS, owners of the GNUniverse).
God will smite you computer using disbelievers for not accepting the 6000 year Universe. Your only salvation is to face Kentucky and believe.
What happened before the big bang? (Score:5, Funny)
ereh ees ot gnihtoN (Score:3, Funny)
Re:But time doesn't exists yet (Score:2, Funny)
ob (Score:2, Funny)
So Douglas Adams was right... (Score:3, Funny)
The universe DOES recreate itself, each time stranger than before...
Before the Big Bang? (Score:2, Funny)
"What's THIS button do?"
Re:Easy (Score:5, Funny)
obDrWho (Score:3, Funny)
Re:But time doesn't exists yet (Score:2, Funny)
Re:But time doesn't exists yet (Score:2, Funny)
So God Does Too Play Dice (Score:5, Funny)
>One implication of this "cosmic forgetfulness," as Bojowald calls it, is that history does not repeat itself-the fundamental properties of the current era of the universe are different from the last, Bojowald explained. "It's as if the universe forgot some of its properties and acquired new properties independent of what it had before," he told SPACE.com.
So not only does God play dice, but He re-rolls to get a better attribute set.
Re:Easy (Score:5, Funny)
Considering God had yet to create humans, this was a particularly difficult paper to write.
Re:Easy (Score:1, Funny)
I'm sure you meant to say:
I forgive you,
Ramen
Re:Easy (Score:2, Funny)
I can't believe that. If God was a student, he wouldn't have taken six days to create the world and then rested on the seventh, he'd have spent six days partying, half the seventh hung over and stayed up all night to get it finished.