Sea Life Wiped Out by Neutron Star Collision?

Memorize writes "Scientists report in the Journal of Astrophysical Letters that a mass extinction of marine life 450 million years ago might have been caused by radiation from an exploding star, such as a collision between two neutron stars, or a neutron star collapsing into a black hole. Such an event would cause a ten-second burst of gamma radiation, and if it occurred within our galaxy, it could have wiped out many species on earth. At least if astronomers find out that an asteroid is heading our way, we can do something about it, but if there is a gamma burst, we get no warning. And if we did, would there be any way to protect the planet?"

No.

[DreamerFi]

And if we did, would there be any way to protect the planet?"

No.

Gee, I wish all "Ask Slashdot" postings were this easy..

Well, it's not all bad

[dirtsurfer]

On the bright side, gamma ray exposure is what brought us the Hulk, and his hot cousin She-Hulk. So hey, what's few million flavors of fish, give or take?

Tried and True

[Grayden]

Tinfoil hats for everyone!

Independant confirmation

[Chairboy]

I can confirm the veracity of the theory, I've actually reproduce it through experimentation. My partner and I set up a live and a control group and did a sequenced build up until... well...

So anyways, we put Sea Monkeys in a microwave oven.

Oh come on!

[Chuck Chunder]

A giant tinfoil hat is what's called for.

Things We Can Do

[the pickle]

1) Send Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck to break the gamma ray in half...wait...

2) Make a gigantic lead planetary Dyson sphere [wikipedia.org]

3) In the immortal words of David Levinson [imdb.com], "Uh, hide."

4) PANIC!!!

5) Seven words: Journey to the Center of the Earth [imdb.com].

6) Profit!!!

7) Seriously, did you just ask what we could do? Of course there's nothing we can do, you rhetorical-question-asking moron. We hope to Darwin that we can evolve.

8) Natalie Portman naked in hot grits. (If the world was about to end in a giant gamma ray bath, that is.)

p

Re:Scary Stuff

[LewsTherinKinslayer]

I'm only kidding. I'm not in favor of any kind of world wide death of humanity either; I think the loss of any life is a tragedy, let alone EVERY life. But still, the odds of this occuring are probably astronomically small. (pun not intended.)

RE Sea Life Wiped Out by Neutron Star Collision?

[soulrider2k]

And if we did, would there be any way to protect the planet?

I dunno, a massive pair of Blue Blockers?

Re:No.

[Grey Ninja]

All you have to figure out now is how to get 20 of the world's prettiest supermodels at your house, and some animal specimens, during the time of this burst, so you could repopulate the earth later.

Well, you could probably save on space a little by just simply keeping about 5 sheep in the house.

Re:No.

[constantnormal]

And if we did, would there be any way to protect the planet?"

Consults Homeland Defense Handbook ...
... it says here to "Duck and Cover".

I guess all that duct tape and plastic wrap will not be useful.

As per your instructions...

[Ieshan]

As per your instructions, we've launched the probe.

Good luck sir, and Godspeed!

I'm prepared!

[Goalie_Ca]

*puts on tin foil hat*

So what you're saying is...

[Anonymous Coward]

then you'd need to wrap the earth in a few feet of lead ... the earth needs a tin-foil hat?

Re:As per your instructions...

[Anonymous Coward]

Oh, my ass!

Why? WHY???

Re:Yet another reason

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm sure being 0.00001 light years away from the Earth (yes, Mars) will be far enough away to prevent the radiation that has already travelled 6000 light years from frying you.

Re:You should be VERY WORRIED

[Anonymous Coward]

What if a terrorist gets one of these 'neutron stars?' Who is protecting our freedoms!?

Re:No.

[Spruce28]

Great, Now we just have to get the rest of the food chain into the shelters so when we come out there is something to eat.

Re:Where's the science?

[Tablizer]

but what about the evidence that brought them to this model to begin with?

They found a tape recording of the life at the time, similar to the one found with the dinosaurs:

Dinosaur one: It's great ruling the world isn't it?
Dinosaur two: Yes, it's great!
Dinosaur one: It's like, we're the best! You can't beat us!
Dinosaur two: Yes! Like, we're the tops! Go dinos!
Dinosaur one: Go dinos!!
Dinosaur two: Yes! Go dinos!! Go go go!!!
Dinosaur one: Look at that pretty light in the sky!
Dinosaur two: Oh yes. Pretty! And growing...

(curtesy prior slashdot)

Bush's fault!

[Anonymous Coward]

It's Bush's fault. Global warming! Save the icebergs! It's Bush's fault. Let's get a Democrat there so that the earth will cool down.

Optimal solution here

[Lighterup]

For a limited time I am offering heavy gamma screen lotion. This specially formulated lotion can provide you with protection for up to 12 seconds. Our lotion has been formulated with special serpentin oils and thus is guarented to work. We offer full money back after neutron star event,if your not satisfied.

How about this...

[Anonymous Coward]

Couldn't we all just crowd around inside the shadow of the moon?

No, I didn't read TFA.

Re:not anymore

[Anonymous Coward]

You forgot to refute his point.

Re:Tried and True

[PakProtector]

Son, let me tell you something about tin foil hats. You think you kids have it soooo tough these days. Back in my day we didn't have tin foil hats. We had to wear lead hats! And we liked it! You young people, with your high /. user IDs, you don't know how good you have it! Tinfoil! Hmph!

Re:Easy answer

[Anonymous Coward]

Tin foil can't help you now!

Right. Aluminum foil all the way. I've been saying that for years anyway. Protected from aliens AND nutrino stars.

Re:Scary Stuff - Child rearing

[xav_jones]

I thought we fell apart much more rapidly because of child-rearing.

Re:No.

[WoBIX]

Wouldn't it cost less to feed the models? :)

Joke #2

[Anonymous Coward]

if there is a gamma burst, we get no warning. And if we did, would there be any way to protect the planet?

Planet sized tinfoil hat.

Ah, yes: the selfish gene

[curlyjunglejake]

You are confusing what you ought to do with what mathematically represents the general tendancies of your breeding behavior. In doing so, you deprive yourself of all the advantages of humanity. I also read the selfish gene. I was barely a highschooler when I read it: already interested in the field of genetics. At the time, it made a brilliant sort of sense. Our actions encaged by the selfish genes. How brilliant, how pure! When I grow up, I will have harems and seed sperm banks. My sweet sweet genes will survive! Twelve years and a lot of population genetics later I still remember that book quite clearly. I remember it because of how little since it makes in the face of real science. The first major crime committed by your arguement is that of heubris. Genetically, the death of the individual does not matter that much for a given gene pool. Your genes will continue as long as the group's genes continue: every gene in your genome will be represented. It makes heroism make a bit of sense. It opens us up for freedom to die. Quite liberating, actually. The second major crime espoused by your position is that of confusing mathematics with philosophy. Allow to to provide an example. When I was a young lad, after reading that foolish book, I was really concerned: I was brilliant, and it was my duty to insure my brilliant genes would pass on. I could insure this with my brilliance; with the harems and sperm banks previously mentioned. But would this be enough? Would I also have to go on semenary roadtrips across foreign lands, seeding the population like johnny appleseed? That's what Attila the Hun had to do, but I don't know if I could act like that. How would I be able to overcome my moral repugnance to the actions of the selfish genes? I was truly concerned that my moral sense was going to be a competitive disadvantage. Poisoned by memes! For surely nothing so disadvantageous as morality could have a genetic component? You have to forgive me for worrying about such silly things as selfish genes: I was extremely young and uneducated. I don't worry about that stuff any more. My genes aren't anthropomorphic things that define me and dictate my actions. They have brought me where I am, but then leave it up to me to decide what to do with it. Surely you can think of examples of choices that make sense for the individual but not for their genetic legacy? Surely you don't think that becasue genes are passed on, that that becomes more important than the choices you make? Monks make choices; they find those choices to be more important than passing on their legacy. Their genes are still circulating in the community of other humans; it is no loss to the pool. Their genes wouldn't care even if they did have a say. Evolutionary principles may tell us what happens, but they can never justify those choices. Your arguement could equally be used to rationalize male polygamy because of evolutionary tendancies. LEAVE DARWIN OUT OF IT. Mathematics has never been used to dictate morality.

Re:Scary Stuff

[ozmanjusri]

Genes create more genes because otherwise we wouldn't call them genes.

I've often wondered what their motivation was. Simple as that, eh?

Cool, thanks.

in that case

[N3wsByt3]

Let's hope it's the OTHER half. ;-)

Re:Greg Egan's Diaspora - Speak for yourself

[Ada_Rules]

Unfortunately for us, we don't have the option available to the novel's post-human conscious software characters of escaping an impending gamma-ray burster by migrating to a higher spacetime geometry.

Speak for yourself.. I am out of here. Love, [e-mail]

Re:Scary Stuff

[first.last]

I for one welcome our new Incredible Hulk overlords.

Re:Joke #2

[Winkhorst]

It is the policy of the Shrub Administration that planets should abstain from relations with black holes. Space shields are frowned upon, unless they involve terrorists.

Re:Scary Stuff

[Anonymous Coward]

"IANAAP (i am not an astro physicist,)[...]"

EAOSIONB (Either abreviate, or spell it out, not both.)

Re:Scary Stuff

[CreatureComfort]

Actually I spend a lot of time worring about the atoms of my underwear doing that...

OK, I'll be honest. I spend a lot of time hoping the atoms of the underwear the hostess of the party will do that... but then I don't tend to get invited to those kinds of parties.


DNA, you are missed.

Comment removed

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:Scary Stuff

[Neurotoxic666]

No, I don't actually sit around worrying about gamma ray bursts,

Neither do I. I *know* my tinfoil hat will protect me.

Re:Scary Stuff - Child rearing

[worst_name_ever]

mammoth trample

Dude, excellent band name!

Actually...

[Create an Account]

I have an AOL email account, so I expect to be still getting spam a thousand years from now.

Re:Joke #2

[tkg]

Given that we're talking gamma radiation, that should be a lead foil hat.

Re:Scary Stuff - Child rearing

[Aumaden]

... you had to walk miles everyday to get food, or move to a place with food or water, etc

Hey, I'll have you know the vending machine is *all the way* on the *other* side of the building. As soon aa a cube over there frees up, I'm outta here. Hmm, it might speed things up if I push Joe in front of that next mammoth.

Re:Scary Stuff

[LoyalOpposition]

Don't anthropomorphize genes. They don't like it when you do that.

-Loyal

Re:Scary Stuff

[gstoddart]

Something like this, you have absolutely no legacy whatsoever. No kids to carry things on, nobody left to remember you, none of your accomplishments mattering.

That is probably true of 90% of the people reading that post.

Re:Are we really this blind?

[WarPresident]

I think it's great how preoccupied so many people are about these completely obscure hypothetical apocalypse events. If life has been ticking for hundreds of millions of years without a hitch you can be damn sure that the least of our worries are going to be random gamma radiation. How about the fact that we've lost almost 50% of all types of tropical, mediterranean and temperate forests as well as 30% of deserts over the past 100 years. Stop staring at the sky waiting for asteroids and mythical dragons to swoop down and annihilate the human race, the SUV in your driveway is a much more likely candidate people...

Okay, if the human race destroys itself before the next Gamma ray burst hits the planet, I owe you a Coke.

Re:Ah, yes: the selfish gene

[MortisUmbra]

Maybehecouldntreadthesarcasmthroughthebigrunonsent ence?