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Science

Scientists Discover Meaning of Life Through Massive Computing Project 123

Posted by samzenpus from the bring-a-towel dept.
First time accepted submitter Rabbit327 writes In a stunning announcement today scientists have announced that after millions of cycles of computing time on some of the largest super computers that they have discovered the meaning of life. On April 1st 2015 at approximately 03:42 GMT scientists discovered that a long running program had finished. The results stunned scientists who were having tea in the other room when the alarm went off. According to the scientific team the answer was stunning yet confusing. Quoting one scientist "It's amazing. It worked! But what does it mean?!? For heaven's sake we spent all this time calculating the answer to the ultimate question about life, the universe, and everything. This is the answer we get?!? This is the bloody answer we get?!?!??!?" after which the scientist promptly threw a keyboard across the room. According to inside sources the answer given by the computer was "42". What this means will be announced later according to a research representative.
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Scientists Discover Meaning of Life Through Massive Computing Project More

Scientists Discover Meaning of Life Through Massive Computing Project

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  • Lame, lame, lame (Score:4, Insightful)

    by BarbaraHudson ( 3785311 ) <barbara.jane.hudson@nospAM.icloud.com> on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:01PM (#49388627) Journal
    Not even funny. Someone please make it STOP!!!

    • Re:Lame, lame, lame (Score:5, Funny)

      by Tablizer ( 95088 ) on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:11PM (#49388689) Journal

      If you complain, you get /. beta.
      - Dice.moc

      • Re: (Score:1)

        by Anonymous Coward

        I don't care. Who enjoys reading this crap anyhow? I hate April Fools Day.

      • Dice.moc?

        Oh great, Dice is using Qt

      • Re: Lame, lame, lame (Score:1)

        by Anonymous Coward

        That would have been a good April Fools joke story: "Slashdot to Deploy 'Beta' in Full by May 2015"

    • I don't think you understand. After seeing all these strange articles, I have come to the conclusion that these are not April Fools jokes. A real slashdot april fools joke would have been witty and subtle. It is obvious that someone is using Samz/Zonk to spread their SyFy/Dice propaganda. Probably communists.

      If you are reading this Samz/Zonk, message for help by making the first letter of each word of the title of the next article spell out "SOS". Be discreet about it so that your captors remain unaware.

      • After seeing all these strange articles, I have come to the conclusion that these are not April Fools jokes. A real slashdot april fools joke would have been witty and subtle.

        You are to be commended for the only constructive criticism I've seen so far among a flurry of comments best translated as, "I dinna like it, can't tell you what I like but I'll know when I see it. Next!". Like a game of darts where you score by hitting the other players.

        My submission Evidence Suggests LHC Test Already Begun [slashdot.org] did not make the front page lineup, maybe it was too subtle.

        '42:MOL' has achieved cultural Trope [wiktionary.org] status for many of us. If I am ever on an elevator with a 42nd floor button, I for one

        • Basically, I just went to previous year's April fools Slashdot stories, found some +5 comments, and copy/pasted them into this story. That comment was copied almost verbatim from 2006, mainly because I thought it was hilarious. It was an ignominious act, but something had to be done.

        • This site bills itself as news for nerds. Self respecting nerds should be familiar with the Hitchhiker's Guide and its main tropes, even if they choose not to read it.

          For me, the fact that it was presented as a straight up news story was what made the post work.

    • The worst thing about it is that, unlike other sites, Slashdot is completely worthless and unusable today. I keep loading it out of habit to check throughout the day and forget that there's not a single thing I want to read. I've been going back to yesterday's stories to see if I missed anything.

    • You are a sad sad person if you don't think that is funny.

      • Re:Lame, lame, lame (Score:5, Funny)

        by BarbaraHudson ( 3785311 ) <barbara.jane.hudson@nospAM.icloud.com> on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @07:57PM (#49389031) Journal
        It would have been better if the story was:
        Scientists Discover Meaning of Life Through Massive Computing Project - And It's Not 42!

        Because the real answer is "potato".

        • Sure, NOW the real answer is potato, but that only because once you've found the answer it changes. Wait, now that you found the answer was potato, the real answer is something else, never mind.

      • it was funny the first 100 times.

        also, if it was posted as news on CNN or whatever, sure yeah, a link to there would be worth it. but this year slashdot was just full of these fucking shitty old "jokes" that were posted only to slashdot. like, for april 1st slashdot turned into an original news site with no source attribution or nothing. shitty jokes with links to something that explains the joke and no other link in the summary(that is to say the "summary" became the article).

        it's shit.

        it's shit.

        • Wait, have you just discovered Slashdot? I can't remember a single April Fools day in the past 15 years when Slashdot hasn't done this. I've actually been looking forward to this for a few days. It's not as epic as the Ponies one, but still enjoyable IMHO.

    • Indeed. It would have been funny if the answer was "There is now". But as is, it's just lame.

      • No, that's the answer to the question, "Is there a God" when put to a computer capable of determining the answer, which then summons a lightning bolt to weld its power switch permanently in the on position.

        • That's my point, a crossover - substituting on for the other at the last moment would have been funny.

          Not to the pedantic wing of the nerd community, but they often miss the point.

    • "Not even funny. Someone please make it STOP!!!"

      To do that, you have to turn off all the lights in this room, close the door, and then press the black STOP button, which then lights up black to indicate that your wish has been granted.

      [Hushed chorus] Glad to be of service...

    • I agree.

      Someone didn't THINK too DEEPLY about this...

    • Re: (Score:2)

      by Askmum ( 1038780 )
      Is every "news" item today fake? That's no april fools' joke, that's trying to make /. beta happen. Want to alienate your readers? Just keep this up.

    • Re: (Score:2)

      by MrKaos ( 858439 )

      Not even funny. Someone please make it STOP!!!

      Relax :), why don't you just think of them like puzzles? Try to figure out what movie it is as a game, I haven't been able to get them all, but it is pretty geeky.

      Dammit I've got work to do!!

  • Bit late aren't you ? (Score:4, Insightful)

    by MarkTina ( 611072 ) on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:05PM (#49388645)

    It's April 2nd here ....

  • And the answer is: (Score:4, Funny)

    by Tablizer ( 95088 ) on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:06PM (#49388651) Journal

    41.9999999999999387

    • You are wrong. The correct answer to the meaning of life is. 68.9999999999999387

    • Re: (Score:2)

      by gnupun ( 752725 )

      There is no ONE answer to the meaning of life. Let's say a computer does compute some answer X as the meaning of life. We can easily find Y, an alternative answer, that is in no way related to X, and another answer Z, that is not related to X or Y and so on. This (pseudo) proof shows that there is no ONE answer to the meaning of life.

  • You fucked this spoof of so ridiculously, I'm surprised you even got 42 right.

    Stop. Seriously, Just fucking stop.

    JUST STOP, NO ONE WANTS YOU TO POST THIS CRAP, READ THE GOD DAMN COMMENTS ON EVERY STORY POSTED TODAY.

    If you're going to post this shit, you at least have to have read the book before you start making shit up.

    • I am finding these stories very entertaining...

      Oh, the stories aren't that great, chuckleworth at best, but certainly not actually funny. The entertainment factor is all the people who are absolutely losing their shit over these stories. You would think that someone just deleted the last known copy of 'Star Wars' for all the nerd rage that is going on.

      Slashdot Editors, please tell me that the real April fool's joke is poking the /. trolls with a stick. Because if was your goal, you just won at the Int

      • You need to research the meaning of the term 'troll.'

        The trolls are the posts on the front page of /. today.

        The people who you refer to as 'trolls' are rough fish. Flippin' around in the bottom of the boat, no less.

    • What is the problem. I've been have a great read all day. I haven't laughed this much since last April Fools Day. You must be under a wet blanket, in a storm, with you laptop battery about run out.

  • We got it... (Score:5, Insightful)

    by x0ra ( 1249540 ) on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:11PM (#49388683)
    You, Dice's editors, all love SF, and spam /. with all the legends, but ENOUGH is fracking ENOUGH. Maturity is about knowing when to stop, and I think we've way beyond reason...

    • Re: (Score:2)

      by idji ( 984038 )
      Slashdot just trolled you all. Actually they are all lame today, but at least i laughed at how lame this was, and how trolled you were!

    • Maturity is about knowing when to stop, and I think we've way beyond reason...

      The clock is about knowing when to stop, and here where I am it's still only 10:40PM on April 1.

    • Maturity is about knowing when to stop, and I think we've way beyond reason...

      Anybody want a peanut?

  • Slashdot hates you. (Score:1)

    by Anonymous Coward

    This is proof.

  • didn't the pranks stop at noon? Stop breaking the April Fools Rules!

  • Time for more subtle April fools? (Score:5, Informative)

    by Twinbee ( 767046 ) on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:16PM (#49388703)
    I'm sorry guys - this is a little OTT, and a trillion miles away from subtle or funny. You want a proper April fools? Try the one I saw at a subreddit within Reddit: https://twitter.com/TeslaMotor... [twitter.com]

    • They needed to post a few dumber April Fools jokes, you know.

      Slashdot isn't just nerds anymore. There are IT types here, too. The kind with certs.

  • Filled up the page (Score:4, Insightful)

    by steveg ( 55825 ) on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:18PM (#49388713)

    OK, now that the whole front page is non-fool gags, are we done now?

    Either post some actual April-fool type stories, or go back to regular news.

    Please?

  • Yeah, I know it's only one day, but please stop these uninteresting parodies. Thank you. I want my real slashdot news back.

  • white mice? (Score:3)

    by aklinux ( 1318095 ) on Wednesday April 01, 2015 @06:24PM (#49388737) Homepage
    What did the little white mice have to say about it? Any comments there?

  • Wow even if it was still April first this would be just plain aweful, but on April second it is just really REALLY sad

    • Pretty sure it's still April 1st here in the US, which is where Slashdot is based out of. Now I'm not saying that the world should be US centric (that's a whole other can of worms), but I think it's reasonable that a US based website operate on US time tables. I would have the same expectation if visiting a UK based site.
  • Anyone know of a slashdot alternative site? This site is getting really annoying to read, to the point I'm wondering why bother.
  • For tea too or coffee too? I prefer its about the coffee, its my goto choice of beverage.

  • Tomorrow us Thursday, the Vogons will be here to destroy the planet.

  • At the big bang. That lead to more 'normal' matter and less anti-matter, which lead to everything else. Likely the only way an imbalance could be created was another big bang, which had 42 more positrons, leading to an alternate universe, with the same starting point, so like is identical in every way.

    • You've got it! The Question(tm)! Does this mean we can quit nailing people to trees and stuff?

    • Re: (Score:2)

      by MrKaos ( 858439 )

      At the big bang. That lead to more 'normal' matter and less anti-matter, which lead to everything else. Likely the only way an imbalance could be created was another big bang, which had 42 more positrons, leading to an alternate universe, with the same starting point, so like is identical in every way.

      That is a *fucking awesome* explanation!!! Bravo, Sir!

  • worst (Score:1)

    by Anonymous Coward

    Worst. April Fools Day. Ever.

  • for embarrassingly bad 4/1 stuff.

  • 42 (Score:1)

    by Norsys ( 4038841 )
    This is ONLY my interpretation. I have no spell check. 4 is comprised of 3 and 1. 3 stands for Universe or perfection (so perfect it seems to allow for imperfection). 1 stands for the one conscious being experiencing the Universe. 2 stands for a couple. In the Bible 40 stands for a really long period of time. And again I claim that 2 stands for a couple. My web page: Http://alamar.webege.com
  • That was the number. Somehow 42 meson, masquerading as electrons (likely baryons because of their decay rate is a bit longer than bosons) unbalanced the big bang. That lead to a pollutant in the universe called 'matter'. All sorts of problems have happened since matter was created. Thankfully not much of it was created, when you consider the normal state of the universe, so call dark matter. The good news is the nature of symmetry requires another big bang happened where 42 mesons, likely created an 'anti-

  • Ok. Here we are HHG2TG. Great series, just too much ridiculous fun, great movie. Marvin reminds me that all the haters have a 'brain the size of a planet' and haven't worked out that the long arm of the geek turning them into a bunch of whining sock puppets. I'm laughing to think those posts can't be undone, does reddit let you do that?

    Frankly the last two weeks for me have been filled with messaging systems, state based machines, programming signal processors, doing intelligence tests, psychometric tests

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