Giant Snails Invade Florida 245
Edgewood_Dirk writes "First spotted in 2011, Giant African Land Snails have migrated to Florida, and are causing massive agricultural and social problems in the state. Hugely destructive to crops, the creatures themselves are dangerous, in that they are able to gnaw through stucco and plastics, will eat almost any organic material, their shells are hard enough to pop tires on the freeway and become shrapnel when run over by lawnmowers. Over a thousand are caught each week in Miami-Dade County and their numbers are only growing as more come out of hibernation. They also carry a form of rat lungworm which can cause meningitis in humans, although no human cases have been reported yet."
Pythons (Score:5, Funny)
I'm hoping we can get the pythons to eat the snails.
The plus side... (Score:4, Funny)
Giant snail racing. Hell yes.
Re:what eats them? (Score:5, Funny)
He's gaining on me! (Score:5, Funny)
Am I the only person that pictured an elderly retiree running from a giant snail in a slow motion chase after reading the title of the article?
Re:what eats them? (Score:4, Funny)
According to an article:
The hermit crab is one of the most dangerous predators to the Achatina fulica and has been known to use the shell as its home. The coconut crab also views the Achatina fulica as a delicacy. The domesticated duck along with a vast variety of other bird species forage on Giant African Snails. Other mammals such as the wild pig prey on Achatina fulica.
Ducks... the US needs lots and lots of ducks.
Re:what eats them? (Score:5, Funny)
The French?
But what will we do when the French start to run amuck?!
Why, then we get Germans!
Re:Points at Giant Snails (Score:5, Funny)
Could things be any better, here in the Sunshine state?
They eat stucco.
In just 24 short months, it is possible that South Florida returns to its native habitat.
BONUS: With the new, snail-driven housing scarcity introduced to an otherwise depressed real estate bubble, rewards are again possible for developers and speculators!
Now, mind that sinkhole. We've got a Colombian cocaine submarine to rendezvous with.
On the bright side they are invading very slowly. (Score:5, Funny)
Top general Erwin Gastropod calls it Schildkrötenkrieg
Re:On the bright side they are invading very slowl (Score:5, Funny)
Your German is perfect! Both in your grammar, and the quality of your joke.
Re:He's gaining on me! (Score:5, Funny)
I was picturing a 1950s-era monster movie poster or trailer, myself.
"Coming this fall to a theater near YOU! They're terrible... they're horrible... they're GASTROPODS!"
"Oh no! The snails have just taken Fort Lauderdale! Hurry! We've only got a few months to evacuate before they eventually get to Miami! The airport will be moderately more busy!"
"Giant snails are invading Florida! Where did they come from? What do they want? How many more will eventually perish in the lethargic onslaught, given enough time? Find out this fall in... DAY OF THE SNAIL!"
Re:what eats them? (Score:5, Funny)
Russian winters.
Rename Time (Score:5, Funny)
Whoever named these things might have missed one of this species' abilities.
Re:Mega Python vs Ultra Snail (Score:4, Funny)
50 foot pythons in the sewers of New York might take care of the rat problem
Might take care of congestion on the subway lines as well...
Ohhhh.... nooooooo..... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Mega Python vs Ultra Snail (Score:5, Funny)
50 foot pythons in the sewers of New York might take care of the rat problem
Might take care of congestion on the subway lines as well...
You don't know New Yorkers very well, do you? The pythons would have to fight for a spot on a rush hour subway car, and I'm not sure the odds favor the snake.
Re:Points at Giant Snails (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Pythons (Score:4, Funny)
>Be my guest. Personally, I think snails are disgusting.
Overcome your food phobia. Snails taste delicious.
And, according to some Asian cultures, so do kittens and puppies.
Prepared correctly, I'm sure just about anything can be tasty.
Sincerely yours,
Captain B.J. Smethwick [wikipedia.org] in a white wine sauce with shallots, mushrooms and garlic.
Can't fight what you don't understand (Score:5, Funny)
Before you can do anything, you need to become acquainted with some basics about the land snails.
Conveniently, someone provided an excellent summary: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTV23B5gBsQ [youtube.com]
Re:what eats them? (Score:5, Funny)
Hence the first rule of warfare: never invade Russia (The Art of Warfare, Sun Tzu, revised edition).
I thought the first rule of warfare is: "never get involved in a land war in Asia"
Re:Points at Giant Snails (Score:4, Funny)
Ah. This is obviously some strange usage of the word "teeny" that I hadn't previously been aware of.