Aussies Could Use Elephants To Fight Invasive Species 274
A type of invasive African grass is a major cause of wildfires in Australia. The giant gamba grass is too large for cattle and the native marsupial grazers to eat, but David Bowman, a professor of environmental change biology at the University of Tasmania has a plan. He says that elephants or rhinoceroses could eat the pest grass. "... the only other methods likely to control gamba grass involve using chemicals or physically clearing the land, which would destroy the habitat. Using mega-herbivores may ultimately be more practical and cost-effective, and it would help to conserve animals that are threatened by poaching in their native environments," he said. This plan makes you wonder just how big a Chinese needle snake can grow.
And in the winter... (Score:5, Funny)
I Don't Know Why We Swallowed The Fly (Score:4, Funny)
Perhaps we'll die...
Elephant Proof Fence (Score:4, Funny)
So there was this fence that was supposed to prevent the plague of rabbits from crossing the country. I don't think it worked. I'm having this vision of a future with an Elephant proof fence. Somehow the idea appeals.
Re:End game (Score:5, Funny)
or rabbits, (Score:5, Funny)
yes rabbits would be a good idea. They are smaller and cuter than elephants and they eat grass as well...
Re:End game (Score:3, Funny)
But who will eat the elephants when they become invasive?
They plan to sterilize the beasts, and track them with GPS.
Plan B involves reintroducing the T Rex, as seen on the documentary Jurassic Park.
And as an added bonus... (Score:4, Funny)
The elephants can be used to stomp on the caine toads.
Re:And in the winter... (Score:4, Funny)
You mean summer?
That really depends... (Score:5, Funny)
[...]they're not exactly small and hard to spot. [...]
If they wear red socks, and hide in a strawberry patch, they're quite hard to spot!
Re:And in the winter... (Score:5, Funny)
Australia has two seasons: summer (August, though for some strange reason, Australians insist on calling it winter) and "I'd rather be in hell" (the rest of the year). Except in Melbourne: all four seasons in one day.
Re:But... (Score:4, Funny)
OK, since I've posted, I've got a brilliant idea: control the elephants by introducing mice!
Re:And as an added bonus... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Need more dangerous animals (Score:5, Funny)
Nah - the traditional method is to barbeque them.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Re:And in the winter... (Score:5, Funny)
Lisa: But isn't that a bit short-sighted? What happens when we're overrun by lizards?
Skinner: No problem. We simply release wave after wave of Chinese needle snakes. They'll wipe out the lizards.
Lisa: But aren't the snakes even worse?
Skinner: Yes, but we're prepared for that. We've lined up a fabulous type of gorilla that thrives on snake meat.
Lisa: But then we're stuck with gorillas!
Skinner: No, that's the beautiful part. When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death.
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/5F22 [snpp.com] Bart the mother
Re:End game (Score:5, Funny)
They taste like Bald Eagles, which taste quite a bit like the Spotted Owls.
Re:End game (Score:5, Funny)
Are elephant germs really that dangerous?
Re:End game (Score:3, Funny)
I prefer "Long Pig". There's lots and plenty of them! The tasiest most tender ones are cubicle workers (esp. IT workers) and truck drivers, neither of which are missed when they disappear. Nice and tender like veal. Stay away from construction workers, too stringy. Besides, I never liked Mexican food.