Kilogram Gets Controversial; Why Not Split the Difference? 520
gbrumfiel writes "As Slashdot has noted, the kilogram has a problem. The SI unit is officially defined as the weight of a 130-year-old platinum-iridium cylinder in France. But the physical object appears to be getting lighter. Scientists want to replace the cylinder with a new standard based on Planck's constant, but two experiments designed to facilitate the switch keep coming up with different results. Now one researcher is proposing a solution: just average the two diverging experiments and use that value as the official definition. Not everyone thinks that averaging the two amounts to sound research: 'Deciding to just average these two results would be perfectly proper mathematics, but it would not be science,' says Michael Hart, a physicist at the University of Manchester, UK."
Impossible (Score:5, Funny)
Reminds me of the deer that got away (Score:5, Funny)
A physicist, engineer and a statistician are out hunting. Suddenly, a deer appears 50 yards away.
The physicist does some basic ballistic calculations, assuming a vacuum, lifts his rifle to a specific angle, and shoots. The bullet lands 5 yards short.
The engineer adds a fudge factor for air resistance, lifts his rifle slightly higher, and shoots. The bullet lands 5 yards long.
The statistician yells "We got him!"
Bread not working? (Score:4, Funny)
Let them eat pounds!
How it gets lighter (Score:5, Funny)
It turns out that France imposed a Mass Tax in the last few years which means the cylinder has to cough it up for the good of the state.
On the plus (or more like the non-plus) side, the people of France are now looking fit & trim.
Well, duh. (Score:5, Funny)
Why don't they just take the weight of a gram and multiply it by 1024?
Re:Well, duh. (Score:5, Funny)
I think that would be a kibigram.
Don't let the industry fool you. They introduced that distinction so they can put less in a box and still sell it to you as 1kg of Mac and Cheese.
Re:Impossible (Score:5, Funny)
And what happens to water in a vacuum?
It gets the bag wet.
Re:Reminds me of the deer that got away (Score:5, Funny)
Black Cows in Scotland. (Score:3, Funny)
Re:How it gets lighter (Score:5, Funny)
So, the French govt had to run a weigh?
Re:Reminds me of the deer that got away (Score:2, Funny)
Metric System (Score:2, Funny)
I've always said this whole metric system has been a farce from the get go. First the unit of length is based on a fraction of the circumference of the earth, only measured WRONG, and now we get that the reference mass has been changing with time putting the amount of kippers in a kilogram in doubt.
I say we just scrap the whole thing and go to a more humanistic system based on things like the length of a man's stride etc. since obviously getting something accurate is just right out.
They call that math? (Score:5, Funny)
Math is: When there's this room... with only one person in it... and then two people leave that room... now you have to wait until another person goes back in before it's actually empty.
Re:Reminds me of the deer that got away (Score:5, Funny)
Not necessarily - everything is relative. For example, you have to also look at it from the deers frame of reference:
A deer is wandering through the forest. Suddenly, a physicist, engineer and a statistician appears 50 yards away holding guns.
The deer looks at them carefully and thinks - a physicist, an engineer and a statistician: I'd best just stand still.
Re:Impossible (Score:4, Funny)
Then they should base it on the pound, which of course is 96 Roman drams, which of course is 96 * 32 / 25 Greek drachma, which is of course 96* 32 / 25 * 6 obols, which is of course 96 * 32 / 25 * 6 * 12 grains of barley.
Or maybe, since measurements were originally based on important items of trade, we should modernize that a bit and standardize based on a dozen iPhones.
Re:How it gets lighter (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Reminds me of the deer that got away (Score:4, Funny)
A deer is wandering through the forest. Suddenly, a physicist, engineer and a statistician appears 50 yards away holding guns.
The deer thinks about this carefully for a moment. The likelihood that a physicist, engineer and statistician being able to form a cohesive group is unlikely. Forming a cohesive group in a forest, even less likely, and forming a cohesive group with guns involved practically improbable, as they most likely would have killed each other arguing over some pointless aspect or theory that the deer had worked out ages ago.
The deer comes to the realization that the only way that this situation could be real is if some other being had concocted it as a piece of fiction in some alternate universe. The deer sighs and holds perfectly still as a shot goes long, and another goes short, and the third guy never shoots his gun, claiming the dear has been shot. The deer shakes its head sadly for the poor being who created this temporary reality, and for itself as he will have to endure this ritual for as many times as other beings invoke it. Eventually the deer will be allowed to return the ethereal pool of creation, where perhaps its next incarnation will be something more interesting, perhaps as the man from Nantucket or the woman from New Zealand.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)