Chernobyl Area Survey Finds Lasting Problems For Wildlife 201
ninguna writes "The largest wildlife census of its kind conducted in Chernobyl has revealed that mammals are declining in the exclusion zone surrounding the nuclear power plant. While some stories seem to indicate nature is recovering, the actual picture isn't quite so great."
Mammals down, giant insects up (Score:5, Funny)
Re:How does it compare to a Hydro plant though? (Score:3, Funny)
At hydroelectric dams all the birds and mammals rapidly evolve webbed feet and an astonishing ability to hold their breath.
motorcycles (Score:2, Funny)
so what you are trying to tell me is (Score:5, Funny)
that the science behind the godzilla creation myth is not plausible?
don't mess with my religion man
the "chernobyl as permanent earth anus" proposal (Score:5, Funny)
interesting idea
you could extend this to all sorts of research/ energy generation/ disposal issues that would normally send NIMBYs into hyperdrive
anthrax research? sure, no problem
radioactive medical waste? bring it on down!
write a business proposal dude
Re:Mammals != Wildlife (Score:2, Funny)
They are doing great, specially the 12 legged, 90cm legspan, 4 headed spiders.
Re:Humans & Mammals (Score:5, Funny)
and lawyers, politicians, and cable companies.
Of course the cancer rate is lower (Score:2, Funny)
Its basically like free kemo treatments for life combined with free food irradiation. It's probably the healthiest place on the planet. :-)
Re:the "chernobyl as permanent earth anus" proposa (Score:4, Funny)
Yeah it would be a great place to set a Low Budget HDV Filipino Horror Movie....
Re:Shocking! (Score:3, Funny)
I clicked on a Slashdot headline for Chernobyl. I skipped the article, I skipped the summary, I came here looking for the sarcastic "Breaking News!" post, so I could make this post in reply.
My post would be modded down, except now I've said this sentence, I've invoked Heisenburg's Uncertainty Principle upon my post. It will be modded either -1 or +5, and I will not know until I observe it's status tomorrow.
Re:Mammals down, giant insects up (Score:4, Funny)
"On the bright side, giant insects are expected to make a HUGE comeback."
Traveled through New Mexico, lately?
I'd tell you about the bug hotel but fuck if I don't get the chills just thinking about it.
Rainbow grasshoppers easily the size of a 2-AA cell maglite.
Yellow/black worms about as thick as pencils, racing across the roadways at rather fast speeds for a worm.
roads carpeted with black beetles half the size of your foot.
Re:How long till 'clean'? (Score:2, Funny)
"Death by radioactive monkeys!"
One can never have enough monkey-defences.
Re:How long till 'clean'? (Score:5, Funny)
Am I the only person who read gigabecquerels and immediately thought of 60 foot tall mutant squirrels, with glowing red eyes rampaging around the place? If gigabecquerels is not the unit denoting number of mutant squirrels created by the radiation given off, I think it definitely should be.
On a related note, what does it actually mean?
Re:How long till 'clean'? (Score:0, Funny)
> On a related note, what does it actually mean?
It's the amount of radioactivity which your mother was exposed to, causing you to be intellectually challenged enough not to know how to use Google and Wikipedia?
Re:How long till 'clean'? (Score:1, Funny)
I say "Kill them all, let God sort them out!" and "It is a good idea to start with Comic Sans!"
Re:How long till 'clean'? (Score:3, Funny)
How about being gored by radioactive boar [spiegel.de]? which could happen to you today in Berlin, 25 years later and thousands of kilometers to the west.
Re:How long till 'clean'? (Score:4, Funny)
I live in Florida. We have a decent alligator population here. I haven't seen one in the wild in over 20 years.
Having moved from FL just a few years back I have a hard time believing this unless you were living entirely in your parent's basement. This is slashdot so that is certainly a possibility, but hardly anyone has a basement in FL so I'm just confused.
Re:How long till 'clean'? (Score:4, Funny)
I remember a while back seeing a lovely unit Grover on the SA boards came up with.
The problem is that units of radiation tend to be meaningless to most people and they have no rational basis for comparison.
So he started putting everything in terms of SWW(Spooning With Wife, the amount of radiation you receive naturally from her body as a result of spooning with your good lady wife for 8 hours a night for a year)
# Spooning with wife 8 hours a night for a year: 1 SWW (baseline)
# Annual US average background radiation = 144 SWW
# Radiation you get from natural radioisotopes in your own body (like the carbon-14 used in carbon dating): 16 SWW
# 1 Dental X-Ray = 4 SWW
# 1 Mammogram = 28 SWW
# A single dose of roughly 40,000SWWs is the lower limit of toxicity to humans if received at once - this bit is of course a bit fuzzy since it wouldn't be ethical to zap people with exacting doses of radiation and see if they die.
# 400,000SWWs is almost invariably fatal. Protip: limit your spooning to just a few wives at once.
The epa limits could be compared to someone deciding that since almost everyone who falls 20 metres dies that a half metre drop every year for 20 years will kill just the same.
Re:The Decline of Quality Journalism (Score:3, Funny)
I noticed that this comment contains many single-sentence paragraphs.
My instructors back in school smiled upon irony.
Did the mderators not catch this?
+1, funny!