A Space Cannon That Might Actually Work 432
Unequivocal writes "Chalk another one up to Jules Verne. Physicist John Hunter is proposing a space cannon with a new design idea: it's mostly submerged. 'Many engineers have toyed with the [space cannon] concept, but nobody has came up with an actual project that may work. Hunter's idea is simple: Build a cannon near the equator, submerged in the ocean, hooked to a floating rig ... A system like this will cut launch costs from $5,000 per pound to only $250 per pound. It won't launch people into space because of the excessive acceleration, but those guys at the ISS can use it to order pizza and real ice cream.' Though it won't work on people, with launch costs that low, who cares?"
I don't know about space (Score:5, Funny)
I want to order pizza and ice cream on earth, delivered by cannon.
yes it works on people (Score:5, Funny)
it works on people, so long as they're already dead. Why does this matter? Because now I can get the Star Trek space-burial I always wanted!
Re:Ice cream? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Now all we need... (Score:2, Funny)
Dammit. Those music-stealers ruin everything.
Re:I don't know about space (Score:5, Funny)
I want to order pizza and ice cream on earth, delivered by cannon.
That's what ICBMs are for - Ice Cream Ballistic Missiles.
Re:atmospheric stresses (Score:5, Funny)
Launching people (Score:2, Funny)
Though it won't work on people...
I'm sure it would launch people just fine.
Re:Forget about pizzas and ice cream, launch cubes (Score:2, Funny)
What do you mean "Who cares?" (Score:1, Funny)
What do you mean "Who cares?", I have several people I would like to launch into space cheaply. This product completely misses my needs.
Re:on earth, delivered by cannon (Score:3, Funny)
You have next door neighbor whose mutt is shitting projectiles at 13,000 mph?
Finally, the problem of cheap space access resolved!
Stating the obvious (Score:4, Funny)
Re:I don't know about space (Score:3, Funny)
Ben & Jerry's ICBMs: It's a delicious apocalypse!
Re:We need more ideas such as this (Score:5, Funny)
design the cannon like a thermos bottle as sounds require a medium to propagate which is why in space no one can hear you scream.
So your going to have explosive pressure on one side, huge water pressure on the other side, and a vacuum in the middle?
What could go wrong?
Re:To be clear (Score:3, Funny)
It's just that people won't be people if they try.
Sing it with me now!
People are people
So how can it be
That you and I accelerate
So awfully?
Re:Hunter should watch his back (Score:5, Funny)
I'm a necromancer, you insensitive clod!
Re:We need more ideas such as this (Score:4, Funny)
Or politics?
Re:I don't know about space (Score:1, Funny)
Hey! No re-purposing the Inter-Continental Bacon Mover!
Re:We need more ideas such as this (Score:3, Funny)
SPACE ELEVATORRRRR
(it sounds so cool when you type it in caps!)
Strange. My keys sound the same in any case... or font for that matter.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Re:We need more ideas such as this (Score:2, Funny)
So what you're saying is "Space is big. Really big...."
Re:We need more ideas such as this (Score:3, Funny)
You got it wrong, even though the cannon is submerged into ocean it is not going to shoot whales into space. And even if it did, I am not sure how tylenol would help them.
Twisting Cable (Score:5, Funny)
Dear sir,
If we twisted the cable around the earth, and the cable was connected to the moon on the other end, we could tow the moon back here.
Whichever country it landed on would then be the largest country in the world. (Although it would also be squished.)
We could use this technique to explore space cheaply.
I will authorize funding for space exploration only if this method is used.
Regards,
Your Elected Representative
PS - As a side benefit, we can invade the moon.
Re:We need more ideas such as this (Score:4, Funny)
Since the Moon isn't in geosynchronous orbit, the surface moves relative to the Moon you'd end up winding the cable around the planet.
Make the cable sharp enough and this would do a fine job of slicing the planet in half at the equator, so we could finally be rid of those damn South Americans. Northern hemisphere FTW!
Re:We need more ideas such as this (Score:1, Funny)
Obviously we need to make it out of money!
Lost baggage?? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Fuck whales. (Score:4, Funny)
Seriously.
Why should whales get dibs on the whole ocean.
People like you are the reason Kirk had to go back in time to the 1980s. Sheesh.
Re:Duh, we bomb the shit out of those who have the (Score:1, Funny)
I think anyone on Slashdot who claims that Saddam modelled his lifestyle on James Bond movies is not being serious.
That was Kim Jong Il.
Re:Hunter should watch his back (Score:3, Funny)
Oh wait...
The Canadian Seal teams are comprised of actual seals.