8% of Your DNA Comes From a Virus 478
An anonymous reader writes "About 8 percent of human genetic material comes from a virus and not from our ancestors, according to an article by University of Texas at Arlington biology professor Cédric Feschotte, published in the Jan. 7, 2010 issue of Nature magazine."
Ob. Matrix quote (Score:2, Funny)
Humans are a virus!
Not Bad (Score:5, Funny)
Like my PC (Score:5, Funny)
But I use antivirus!!!! (Score:5, Funny)
Doesn't Norton protect me from such stuff?
Revelation (Score:5, Funny)
I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here, Mr. Malda. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You are a plague and we are the cure.
Either that, or... (Score:2, Funny)
They really need to stop using thier gene sequencers to search for porn.
Re:Virus? Hardly. (Score:1, Funny)
No, no, you just don't understand. . .
When the Intelligent Designer was creating viruses after man sinned, so that man would henceforth die, he re-used 8 percent of the genetic code *of man* to make the viruses more effective. Yeah. . .that's it. See, Intelligent design isn't just Creationism re-branded. Oh. Wait. . .
Damn it. (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Not Bad (Score:2, Funny)
Unless of course it's the 8% that makes you bald as you get older, or makes you susceptible to heart disease or diabetes, or any number of inherited undesirables.
No, those are the symptoms of our genetic origins as Pak Protectors http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pak_Protector
Re:Summary and article misleading (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:4, Funny)
Humans are a virus!
Before the Matrix, there was Bill Hicks: "I'm tired of this back-slapping 'isn't humanity neat' bullshit. We're a virus with shoes, okay?"
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:5, Funny)
Linux kernel (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:5, Funny)
That's why I eat copious amounts of pasta, so that I, too, may be touched by His Noodly Appendage.
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:0, Funny)
Admit that you are a sinner
Believe in Christ Jesus that he has died for the sins that you have committed
Commit yourself daily to serving The Lord
A-B-C
A Woman's Perspective (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:5, Funny)
Commit yourself daily to serving The Lord
With some fava beans and a nice Chianti, fthfthfthfth.
Re:Not surprising, given how DNA actually works (Score:3, Funny)
Actually I'm pretty sure 100% of our DNA is basically crap that only exists because at some point in the past it was better at copying itself ;)
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:2, Funny)
They are just jealous because they never got that transubstantiation miracle to work right. That or the 2000 year old zombie flesh tastes conspicuously like unleavened bread... which tastes conspicuously like cardboard. Frankly, I think that they would do a lot better if they started out with a pork roast. At the very least it would require a bit less suspension of disbelief when the Saviour is rolling around in your mouth.
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:4, Funny)
Turning people into newts.
Hey, he got better.
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Mammals (Score:5, Funny)
8 Percent! (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:5, Funny)
You know, there's a real easy way to tell: If when the source is raising the dead, if you hear beautiful and calming and serene music in a major chord mode, then it is good. If you hear banging on a piano or dissonant violins, then evil.
Re:Bible Code? (Score:3, Funny)
The Creator is actually an infinite number of monkeys?
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:3, Funny)
Frankly, I think that they would do a lot better if they started out with a pork roast.
Well then you'd start another holy war over whether or not it's sacrilegious to smother the Host in barbecue sauce.
Re:Mammals (Score:3, Funny)
The fact that he finished ahead of schedule seems to support this. Why custom tailor DNA when you can use that whole 7th day to rest?
Re:Mammals (Score:3, Funny)
"That's the way God ... using copy & paste? If you really think about it...hacked together in 6 days, spaghetti code where 80% seems to be junk that doesn't even do anything, and is incredibly hard to decipher...
So what the Creationists are saying is basically...
God is a either a chump working at Microsoft, or a really bad software contractor who writes Perl?
This sucks, I want a refund.
Re:Mammals (Score:3, Funny)
"...spaghetti code..."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flying_Spaghetti_Monster [wikipedia.org]
Re:Ob. Matrix quote (Score:3, Funny)
So with more MSG from all the chinese food I might become the next Buddha? About time, I already have had his body for a while.