Micro-Black Holes Make Poor Planet Killers 314
astroengine writes "Physicists are getting excited about the possibility of micro-black holes (MBH) being produced by the LHC and an international group of researchers have done the math to see what kind of impact they could have on the Earth. Unfortunately, if you're a megalomaniac looking for your next globe-eating weapon, you can scrub MBHs off your WMD list. If a speedy MBH is produced, flying through our planet, it will only have a few seconds to accrete the mass of a few atoms. It would then be lost to space where it will evaporate. If a slow MBH is produced, dropping into the Earth where it sits for a few billion years, the results are even more boring."
More Mass = More Suck (Score:5, Funny)
I guess I know what kind of girl to look for now ;)
But what if slow black holes collide? (Score:3, Funny)
Sorry, but I really feel the need to be afraid of something irrational.
Poor MBHs (Score:3, Funny)
Ironically, it sucks to be them :)
But that's how they killed Vulcan... (Score:4, Funny)
How much red matter does the LHC use anyway?
Re:Poor MBHs (Score:4, Funny)
Study Funded By Black Hole Companies (Score:5, Funny)
What people don't realize is that this study was funded by companies that produce black holes.
Re:But what if slow black holes collide? (Score:5, Funny)
Well... (Score:2, Funny)
This sucks.
Re:More Mass = More Suck (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Good article, won't stop the panic of the idjit (Score:5, Funny)
"... if you're a megalomaniac looking for your next globe-eating weapon,... a speedy MBH ... flying through our planet... will only have a few seconds to accrete the mass of ... the Earth ."
WE'RE DOOMED!
Re:But that's how they killed Vulcan... (Score:4, Funny)
Get your crowbars ready. (Score:3, Funny)
Re:More Mass = More Suck (Score:5, Funny)
This has always been true. My friends quip about my dating chubby girls all the time. I never told them why, but they'll know now!
Financial Offer (Score:4, Funny)
Scary Hypothesis.....We are destroying the World (Score:4, Funny)
I think the LHC has destroyed the world multiple times now. It is just that we here and now are the survivors of the disasters....
According to the Multi-verse theory, each quantum fluctuation creates a new universe or timeline.....
Because we are alive and well and not consumed by a black hole, that means in "our" branch of the multiverse we haven't created a Black Hole that swallows earth "yet".....
But fear not because Even if the LHC were to create a earth consuming black hole, strangelet, way to lower the energy level entire universe leading to it's immediate destruction. We will survive because at least one branch of timeline will survive by failing to create these anomolies and go on to branch out some more to survive whatever weird physics experiments we dream up of go arwy.....
The only problem is when creating black hols and exotic matter that is large enough to reduce quantum probability and then we are really screwed.
Re:More Mass = More Suck (Score:3, Funny)
why are fat girls so good at giving head?
becuase they have to be
.
Re:More Mass = More Suck (Score:3, Funny)
why are fat girls so good at giving head?
becuase they're hungry
FTFY
Re:Evaporate? (Score:3, Funny)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hawking_radiation [wikipedia.org]