Cold War Standoff Over ISS Toilet 417
Hugh Pickens writes "The International Space Station, once a place where astronauts would share food and facilities, is said to be embroiled in a Cold War-like stand-off after a Russian cosmonaut complained he is no longer allowed to use a US toilet or the US gym machine. Gennady Padalka, a veteran Russian cosmonaut, says that space officials from Russia, the United States and other countries now require cosmonauts and astronauts to eat their own food and follow stringent rules on access to other facilities, including lavatories. Padalka, who will be the station's next commander, says the arguments date back to 2003, when Russia started charging other space agencies for the resources used by their astronauts and other partners in space station responded in kind. 'Cosmonauts are above the ongoing squabble, no matter what officials decide,' says Padalka. 'We are grown-up, well-educated and good-mannered people and can use our own brains to create normal relationship. It's politicians and bureaucrats who can't reach agreement, not us, cosmonauts and astronauts.' While sharing food in the past helped the crew feel like a team, the new rules oblige Russian cosmonauts and US astronauts to eat their own food. 'They also recommend us to only use national toilets,' says Padalka. 'What is going on has an adverse effect on our work.'"
It's because (Score:5, Funny)
it is amazing that humans ever developed the wheel (Score:5, Funny)
im sure some cave man council decided it would create too much cooperation between rival clans, and tried to stop the project.
Ah the bureaucrat's (Score:5, Funny)
This must have been a bureaucrat level 34 or better that started this. A 35 wouldn't know how to fill out the proper acquisition forms.
Re:My first thought was... (Score:5, Funny)
What was he eating that he clogged up the US toilet?
Thats a legitimate complaint... do you know how much it costs to get a plumber to do a service call?
Ruskies Plan (Score:5, Funny)
"The average Rooskie, son, don't take a dump without a plan."
Re:(I)SS (Score:5, Funny)
Politicians: Hard at work to put the "SS" in ISS.
Just Godwin'd this somehow.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Re:It's because (Score:5, Funny)
Additionally, there seem to be squabbling about the 'under/over' controversy with the toilet paper roll.
Not stupid at all! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:If he has to go... (Score:5, Funny)
Simple Solution (Score:4, Funny)
Do things the RyanAir [avionews.com] way.
Re:Don't use the Vulcan's toilet (Score:5, Funny)
"Or vice-versa the humans toilet. The Earth-Vulcan politicians are squabbling over the respective costs, and don't want non-citizens using their toilets." - United Federation of Planets, official notice
That's what Star Trek would be like if it were realistic - trade and cost disputes. Or just watch Babylon 5 ("By Any Means Necessary").
I thought they just beamed the crap directly from your colon into the anti-matter reaction chamber or Jefferies tubes or something.
Re:It's because (Score:5, Funny)
I'm not sure which is funnier: posting your vote, or getting moderated informative.
Answer: by the asshole in charge (Score:5, Funny)
All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge.
After a while, the feet, stomach, eyes, and brain agreed that the asshole was in charge.
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:5, Funny)
What fucking idiot politician thought this up?
They like pISSing contests. They reached boldly where nobody pissed before.
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:5, Funny)
So you're a Republican?
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:5, Funny)
Wooosh.
How long before... (Score:4, Funny)
One of the agencies sends up a bucket of yellow paint and a paint brush?
(for the bright yellow dividing line down the middle of the station)
Future Presidential Speech text:
"Mr. {insert leader here}, Tear down...er....Wipe Up that line!"
Re:Not stupid at all! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Not stupid at all! (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Not stupid at all! (Score:5, Funny)
Remember, the ISS is now recycling urine for drinking water. Allowing cosmonauts to use our toilet would risk the contamination of our precious bodily fluids. Twice, no less.
No, the problem is that the American filtration system can't process that much metabolized vodka. After five days it would become the International Party Station.
it's not a "stand off" (Score:2, Funny)
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:5, Funny)
/voice=Patrick Stewart
"Hello, this is Captain Picard. On the bridge of the Enterprise, I have no problems with Number One. Number two is a different matter. That's why I use Star Fleet Enemas. With a Star Fleet Enema, you can boldly go like no one has gone before!"
Re:Not stupid at all! (Score:3, Funny)
Wow, you americans are really afraid of communism? =P
I don't think it spread thru urine ..
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:3, Funny)
They're politicians. It's their *job* to be assholes and douchbags.
Oddly enough, politicians say the same thing about people posting about politicians on the internet.
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:3, Funny)
Bush is that you?
Re:Not stupid at all! (Score:3, Funny)
"Twice, no less."
"Two astronauts, one cup?"
Re:Not stupid at all! (Score:4, Funny)
I was thinking you could poop in a plastic bag and throw it outside. However, a frozen turd traveling at over 7km/s might pose a serious hazard.
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:5, Funny)
Americans Get the Short End of the Stick, As Usual (Score:5, Funny)
This is particularly unfair when you consider that, even before this dust-up, Americans couldn't use the other nations' toilets anyway. You see, their normal-sized pee tubes would not accommodate our large American junk.
Had to be done, sorry. :-]
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:2, Funny)
Wooosh.
I can has +5 Funny too?
Re:Fair enough, but... (Score:4, Funny)
Well, he can't go in the American toilet, he can't go in the Russian one. Sounds like he has to boldly go where no man has gone before.
Re:Answer: by the asshole in charge (Score:5, Funny)
Though for some people, their dick is what's actually in charge.
And those people are collectively known as "men".
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Do it anyway (Score:3, Funny)
Aah, the Russians, Capitalists through and through...
Re:Do it anyway (Score:4, Funny)
The Americans are just playing tit-for-tat
Or in this case: shit-for-shat
Re:This is just sheer stupidity. (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Answer: by the asshole in charge (Score:4, Funny)
"We're not assholes, we're dicks. And you... you're all a bunch of pussies!"
Bueaurcratic Paperwork In Space? (Score:3, Funny)
The article mentions all of this could be resolved if the Russians would just sign the formal agreement paperwork (form # URN8-NP) to have a legal document verifying they agree to the terms and for liability reasons.
Re:Don't use the Vulcan's toilet (Score:3, Funny)
>>>I thought they just beamed the crap directly from your colon into the anti-matter reaction chamber or something.
Yeah that's what they TELL you, but in reality Mr. Scott is a wizard and he utters some magic words, waves his wand, and presto. He just covers-up that fact by mumbling random junk about engines and whatnot. Star Trek is actually a fantasy show, like Harry Potter.