Most of Woolly Mammoth Genome Reconstructed 245
geekmansworld writes "From the Washington Post, 'An international team of scientists has reconstructed more than three-quarters of the genome of the woolly mammoth using DNA extracted from balls of hair, the first time this has been accomplished for an extinct species.' Who wants a pet mammoth?"
Just to get it over with quickly (Score:2, Funny)
apparently... (Score:3, Funny)
Mammoth hairballs? (Score:5, Funny)
And I thought cats were disgusting...
Just fill in the remaining genes (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Not quite there yet (Score:5, Funny)
Just download god's genome checker.
[x] Automatically fix chromosome errors
[x] Scan for and attempt to recover bad base pairs
This is huge! (Score:5, Funny)
It could be the solution of how how to maintain legacy systems in generations to come. They just need to start mapping the genes of a COBOL programmer.
Re:oh great (Score:3, Funny)
In Soviet Russia, mammoth mount YOU!
aka "Fatal Attraction 2".
Re:Not quite there yet (Score:2, Funny)
You're thinking of Valley of the Cloneasaurus.
Re:apparently... (Score:1, Funny)
Actually it went from 0.0 to 0.666666
Re:Now that we maybe can make a mammoth (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Mammoth hairballs? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Not quite there yet (Score:4, Funny)
Insensitive Topic (Score:2, Funny)
The only important question (Score:5, Funny)
Do they taste good??
Re:This is huge! (Score:3, Funny)
> They just need to start mapping the genes of a COBOL programmer.
Why would you do that? They are evil!
Little green scaly evil punks. Always with their traps and their "I'm dragon subtype I can reach godhood before level 6". Bah!
Mark my words. You'll regret not having cloned griffins first.
Re:Just to get it over with quickly (Score:3, Funny)
In Soviet Russia, woolly mammoths reconstruct you!!!
Re:Not quite there yet (Score:5, Funny)
Your post advocates a
(x) technical ( ) religious ( ) time travel
approach to resurrecting extinct species. Your idea will not work. Here is why it won't work. (One or more of the following may apply to your particular idea, and it may have other flaws.)
( ) Possibility of creating mutant monsters
( ) We are defenceless against brute force attacks
(x) People will not put up with giant stampy animals roaming about
(x) The police will not put up with giant stampy animals roaming about
( ) Requires too much cooperation from organised religion
(x) Requires immediate total cooperation from government regulators
( ) Time travel isn't possible
( ) Time travel into the past isn't possible without a wormhole which was (is) in the past already
Specifically, your plan fails to account for
(x) Laws expressly prohibiting it
(x) Lack of centrally controlling authority for mad scientists
(x) We haven't even sequenced the whole genome
(x) Being sued by Michael Crichton's estate
( ) Asshats
( ) Jurisdictional problems
( ) Unpopularity of weird old animals
( ) Public reluctance to accept weird old animals
( ) Huge existing animals occupying the evolutionary niche of the old ones
(x) Susceptibility of DNA to damage
(x) We don't even know how many chromosomes it should have
( ) Unavailability of any living relatives to carry the foetus to term
and the following philosophical objections may also apply:
(x) Ideas similar to yours are easy to come up with, yet none have ever
been shown practical
(x) Religions will argue about playing god
(x) Pointlessness of an animal adapted for an ice age during a period of global warming
( ) What's dead should stay dead
(x) There are better things to spend the money on
Furthermore, this is what I think about you:
(x) Sorry dude, but I don't think it would work.
( ) This is a stupid idea, and you're a stupid person for suggesting it.
( ) Nice try, assh0le! I'm going to find out where you live and burn your
house down!
Re:No pet mammoth for me (Score:3, Funny)
How about a furby? [cnn.com]
Re:Mammoth hairballs? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:apparently... (Score:3, Funny)
the numbers of woolly mammoths has tripled in the past six months...
They're breeding.....nature finds a way.
Ummm....where's that helicoptor.
Re:Now that we maybe can make a mammoth (Score:5, Funny)
I don't think you understand. The internet and slashdot was an elaborate ploy by Nivens to get more fans. He planted the ideas for the internet a long time ago and nurtured it until the web was born. He then planted the idea to create a forum for nerds. Once this was done he waited for critical mass and posted this line. Now people like me who stopped reading fiction some time ago, will see this name and investigate on the very same internet! Its rather brilliant. The only thing is that if we comply and read, then he will no longer have a use for the internet and will likely have it taken down (his purpose being completed). To prevent the destruction of this invaluable tool, I will boycott reading any further.
and with my first paranoid rant done, I am ready to start my day!
Re:When did they die out? (Score:3, Funny)
Genetics, no. Gillettes, yes.
Sadly, things were a bit primitive back then. Instead of the 97 steel blades we have now there was only one - and made of flint at that. By the time the poor creatures had even one leg shaved, they'd died of heat exhaustion.
And that, children, is why mammoths are extinct.
Re:Mammoth hairballs? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:pricetag: $10 million, right now (Score:3, Funny)
Yes, but smaller frontal lobes, which are what really matter.
Yeah, well, that's a bit of a grey area.
[ducks, runs]