LHC Success! 1007
Tomahawk writes "It worked! The LHC was turned on this morning and has been shown to have worked. Engineers cheered as the proton particles completed their first circuit of the underground ring which houses the Large Hadron Collider (LHC).
(And we're all still alive, too!)" Here is a picture from the control room which I'm sure makes sense to someone that isn't me.
Epic fail (Score:5, Funny)
It started with the scientists, so noone has noticed anything different yet.
Picture to prove it (Score:4, Funny)
Here's [hisupplier.com]proof.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
It was a triumph, I'm making a note here, huge success!
Based on the images... (Score:4, Funny)
Damnit! (Score:5, Funny)
You're all still here.
Expensive electric train... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
will the doomsayers ever learn for the next time?
Well, they still haven't made the black hole yet. Just wait. When you get sucked in don't come crying to me. I'll be many, many light years away.
Re:BFD (Score:5, Funny)
Does this mean I'll have to build up another sigh of relief and let it out again at a later date?
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Honestly, my take is this. If the LHC guys really do manage to destroy the universe in some science shattering stranglet experiment, well...
That would be rather impressive. It's just too bad no one would be around to bear witness to the fact. ;-)
Or to put it in the context of Stargate...
Carter: He destroyed a solar system.
Jeannie: MEREDITH!
Screenshot (Score:3, Funny)
Well, I'm breathing a sigh of relief to see they're running some sort of *NIX. I was worried a Windows BSOD would mean the end of the world :-).
Realtime LHC Data (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Based on the control room shot... (Score:1, Funny)
It appears that turning on the LHC is transforming the world as we know it into the nightmare world of Linux on the Desktop...
'Damn, this collider-multiverse package doesn't fit well with my graphics card... I'll recompile the kernel changing some stuff.
...
OMG kernel black hole!'
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
... will the doomsayers ever learn for the next time? Probably not. I'm sure next time they'll say "this time, its different, the world is really going to end this time".
Don't knock the doomsayers man! When they think the world is going to end, they start selling (never understood this? The world is gonna end! My couch for $20! Just in case I need to pay a toll on the way to the afterlife..) or giving away all their stuff! I need a new couch so I hope they get all spooked. If I'm lucky, one will have been a gadget nerd and I can get some computer parts too!
Anyone there? (Score:4, Funny)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Of course we're still alive... (Score:2, Funny)
I dont think that colliding hardons is in line with God Particles plan. Im sure that the religious right has something to say about this...
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Pass the c-
What do you mean all the cake is gone?
Coincidence? (Score:5, Funny)
Has anyone seen my cat?
Will you ever learn? (Score:5, Funny)
If disaster movies have taught us anything, it is that only when the party is over and everyone is a little tipsy, the problems will arise.
At that point, one lowly scientist (possible of Asian origin) will still be working in his office - despite regular calls of 'Hu! It's all fine, come out here and have some champagne'. He shouts out 'In a minute, I'm just checking something' Then to himself 'This is wrong. This is all wrong. Planck's constant shouldn't be varying like that.'
And then it all goes wrong.
Jeez, were you born yesterday!
Mark my words... come Friday, we'll all be eating black holes for breakfast with lashings of superheated strange milk.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
I thought they had already turned it on yesterday... Wait, today is September 10th... Again ?
Picture (Score:3, Funny)
> Here is a picture from the control room which I'm sure makes sense to someone that isn't
Looks like one of those freeware DOS screensavers from the 90s.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
For the good of all of us!
(Except the ones who are dead.)
Re:16 bit colour? (Score:4, Funny)
How can they spend £2.6 billion and have control screens that look like a ZX spectrum?
The control screens are high-res, 32-million colors. The 16-bit colors you see are a side effect of the LHC Process. The effect started there and has been spreading outwards... they said not to worry, that we won't know the difference once it hits.
Still alive? (Score:5, Funny)
> And we're all still alive too!
I'm not, you insensitive clod!
Re:Realtime LHC Data (Score:3, Funny)
Wow... you, sir, are dense.
Re:Of course we're still alive... (Score:5, Funny)
Can I help? ;)
Re:Based on the control room shot... (Score:5, Funny)
It appears that turning on the LHC is transforming the world as we know it into the nightmare world of Linux on the Desktop...
If that were true they would of called it Hardy Hadron.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:4, Funny)
We await the results of the test with couched enthusiasm!
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
And the ones who lost their bets with Stephen Hawking about whether they'd find the Higgs Boson.
Re:you can't stop the doomsayers (Score:5, Funny)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
>> ... will the doomsayers ever learn for the next time? Probably not. I'm sure next time they'll say "this time, its different, the world is really going to end this time".
The doomsayers only need to be right once... :)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:3, Funny)
Ah yes - we have 'lolcats', but the aliens have 'lolhomos' or 'lolsaps'!
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Epic fail (Score:5, Funny)
This place has been full of strange matter for a decade now ...
Re:Coincidence? (Score:1, Funny)
Has anyone seen my cat?
Well....
Yes and No
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
That does it. I'm tagging this story 'stillalive'.
Re:Coincidence? (Score:2, Funny)
I think so! Does he look like this [hicinbothem.com]?
Re:Congrats. (Score:3, Funny)
It's always nice to see complex engineering projects that work. It gives the impression that theory and reality are getting closer.
Theory and reality are the same, at least in theory.
Re:Will you ever learn? (Score:5, Funny)
It's probably not a problem, probably, but I'm showing some variations in...
No, it's well within acceptable limits. Sustaining sequence.
Shutting down... Attempting shutdown... it's not, it's not shutting AGGGGHHHHH! ...yeah.
Re:Shuts down for the winter? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:BFD (Score:2, Funny)
No. It means you'll have to check slashdot periodically to see if you're still alive.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:3, Funny)
Holy shit!! Niburu is coming!
We must exodus en masse in a giant ark, and hide within the rings of Uranus!
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
I'll be many, many light years away.
Infinitely many, in fact, if you haven't gotten sucked into the black hole yet.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:1, Funny)
Obligatory: The Cake is a lie.
Nothing to worry about (Score:5, Funny)
But don't forget your towel... just in case.
Oblig. Eddie Izzard (Score:5, Funny)
Cake or death?
Cake please.
Sorry, we're all out of cake. We didn't expect to have such a run on it.
Ok, I'll have the chicken then.
Well... Ok. Good thing we're the Church of England.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Fanboism apart, they haven't crossed the proton streams yet. The event that can generate the strangelets and the black hole.
Yeah but they'll have to cross the streams if StayPuft attacks.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Or: "Every time you masturbate, God destroys a planet" ...
Re:Of course we're still alive... (Score:5, Funny)
I don't know why, but you made me think of this:
Dr. Egon Spengler: There is something very important I forgot to tell you.
Dr. Peter Venkman: What?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Do not cross the streams.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Why?
Dr. Egon Spengler: It would be bad.
Dr. Peter Venkman: I am fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean, bad?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
Dr Ray Stantz: Total protonic reversal.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Right. That is bad. Okay. All right. Important safety tip. Thanks, Egon.
MS Paint Skills Know No Bounds! (Score:2, Funny)
I can draw with MS Paint too you know!
Re:Will you ever learn? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Towels (Score:2, Funny)
In related news, towel sales #s are on an upward trend.
...and the answer is...... (Score:5, Funny)
..... is .... 42!
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:2, Funny)
overflow problems? that can't be right. The calorimeters should never register that much accumulated energy. Let me look into this.
Wait, this is wrong. This is all wrong. Planck's constant shouldn't be varying like that. Attempting shutdown...
it's not... it's not shutting down! Attempting manual override...AGGGGHHHHH!
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Yes, it is September 10th again. You are caught in a time loop. The last time through, the world was destroyed by a black hole. This time, you have again failed to stop the activation, so the same thing will happen. At this point you will wake up 24 hours before the LHC is activated, and realize that you alone can save humanity. To do so you must get to the Swiss/French border and blow the thing to smithereens before it can be turned on.
The presence of this post is of course a major plot hole / deus ex machina, but is necessary to move the storyline along and keep you from going through the time loop fifty times before figuring it all out, as this would make your adventure far too long and repetitive for the people of my alternate universe to enjoy watching footage of.
Re:Oblig. Eddie Izzard (Score:3, Funny)
Cake or death?
Cake please.
Sorry, we're all out of cake. We didn't expect to have such a run on it.
Ok, I'll have the chicken then.
Well... Ok. Good thing we're the Church of England.
Death, please...no no no, I mean cake!
No takesies backsies!
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Kids, take note. This is what happens to your typing, grammar, and spelling when you sniff too much glue.
Re:Oblig. Eddie Izzard (Score:2, Funny)
So, my choices are "or Death?"
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
I'm setting up a standing wager. I'm offering 20 to 1 that the world doesn't get sucked into a black hole. So any takers on the world being destroyed? Your chance to turn $100 into $2000.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
In another news: Gordon Freeman has been spotted in CERN test chamber [shacknews.com].
Re:you can't stop the doomsayers (Score:2, Funny)
Honestly, even if you come up with good reasons, it automatically becomes a cover up to those people, thus excusing even wilder claims.
In memory of September 11th tomorrow, I've been together a montage video of the 9/11 the disaster, but reading comments on 9/11 videos is shocking! Almost everyone who's commented seems happy to believe that the twin towers were destroyed by a conspiracy; an inside job involving hundreds if not thousands of Americans to murder fellow Americans allegedly to give America an excuse to invade Iraq... for oil... or something. I cannot understand what makes these people latch on to the least likely explanation, one which isn't supported by a single shred of evidence!
Re:It's going to be a while (Score:3, Funny)
However, when they DO do it, if the black holes do not dissipate and immediately head for the center of the planet and proceed to grow and kill all of us, does that mean Hawking owes everyone in the world a subscription to Penthouse? Sweet.
Yeah, but at that point, the girls will all be too tall and skinny
Sure, were not dead - but (Score:4, Funny)
No problem here... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:3, Funny)
Carrying a lawn gnome, no less...some skillz on that guy.
The beam is on... but no collisions yet. (Score:2, Funny)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:5, Funny)
Then the science gets done and you make a neat supercollider for the people who are still alive!
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:1, Funny)
In Soviet Universe, every time you destroy a planet, God masturbates!
Re:Sucked in.... (Score:4, Funny)
Thats the new secretary, it might be worth exploring what else she sucks in.
Re:you can't stop the doomsayers (Score:5, Funny)
Total Perspective Vortex (Score:4, Funny)
What do you mean all the cake is gone?
fairy cake.. yeah we had to use it for the LHC.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:3, Funny)
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:2, Funny)
I think that money being pointless pretty much is the point. It'd be hard for someone to collect the $2000 if the world is gone. And if it's not, well, he's up $100.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:2, Funny)
how infibian get advance brain
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:3, Funny)
For those who didn't get it:
http://www.somethingawful.com/flash/shmorky/babby.swf [somethingawful.com]
http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/How_is_babby_formed%3F [encycloped...matica.com]
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:3, Funny)
I think I figured it out. This was obviously typed by an 9 year old. Judging by the user ID, this person would have been just born about the time the account was created. So this is some kid whose parents got him a slashdot account for his 0th birthday, which would explain why he can use big fancy words like Newton and Invertebrates and Infibians, but hasn't quite filled in enough blanks to make any sense. I will bet anyone, however, $100 that the user behind this ID will eventually find the Higgs boson.
Re:LHC isn't running. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Still alive? (Score:3, Funny)
So we have zombies posting on /. ?/quote>
You must be new here.
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:2, Funny)
I'm a lot more worried about this guy [tinypic.com]
Re:More than scientific learning (Score:3, Funny)
I do not think we have to worry about several dooms in a row.
Hey now, I distinctly remember Doom 2 coming out not too long after the original Doom.