Will Mars be a One-way Trip?

alexj33 writes "Will humans ever really go to Mars? Let's face it, the obstacles are quite daunting. Not only are there numerous, difficult, technical issues to overcome, but the political will and perseverance of any one nation to undertake such an arduous task is huge. However, one former NASA engineer believes a human mission to Mars is quite possible, and such an event would unify the world as never before. But Jim McLane's proposal includes a couple of major caveats: the trip to Mars should be one-way, and have a crew of only one person."

Missing item ...

[tomhudson]

a couple of major caveats: the trip to Mars should be one-way, and have a crew of only one person."

... and LOTS of pr0n.

Stupid.

[More_Cowbell]

This may be the dumbest idea I've heard today (it is election season though, there are 6 hours left to hear worse). The article draws comparison to potentially deadly trips like the first South Pole expedition, but surely those people at least intended to come back.

To berate NASA for not wanting to send a multi million (billion?) dollar mission to mars with a pilot that is, after all, suicidal is just asinine.

Candidates

[Reader X]

I can think of at least two guys I'd like to volunteer for this duty. They'd be perfect, and they'll be available as early as January 21, 2009.

Why stop at one?

[edwardpickman]

I say Mars is an ideal Junket for Congressmen. They love to travel I say give them the trip of their lifetimes. They spend so much money here it's gotta be cheaper just to send them to Mars where they can do some good and a lot less harm.

Re:Missing item ...

[JonathanR]

Just what we want: A jizz covered ambassador to Mars.

Re:I mean...

[Rigrig]

You should at least pretend to do so, that way you'll have more volunteers.

Re:A few very complicating points...

[Hotawa Hawk-eye]

The guy would need a *lot* of support from earth. If it doesn't come during the launch window, fatal results.

The astronaut wouldn't be the first mission sent. Send enough supplies for the astronaut to survive even if two consecutive missions failed to reach Mars safely, then send the astronaut.
Or just send someone we don't care so much about. Perhaps someone whose name starts with 'D' and ends with 'arl McBride'?

Re:At least two?

[Perseid]

They should send a Slashdot user. We're all used to that "without sex" deal.

Now, this is the plan.

[Riktov]

Get your ass to Mars.

Re:Missing item ...

[mrbluze]

Why should it be just one person? I can think of hundreds, nay, thousands of people who I think would be worthy of being sent to Mars, never to return!

Re:A few very complicating points...

[mrbluze]

Why do spacecraft have to be sterile?

Well we wouldn't want to send one off to go and mate with a stray, produce hundreds spacecraftlets and thus cause an irreversible imbalance to eco-space, you insensitive clod!

Re:Missing item ...

[Bieeanda]

"He came in peace."

Re:I mean...

[TobyRush]

I bet Rockhound would do it either way!

Re:A few very complicating points...

[edwardpickman]

They could send Balmer. Just make sure he has a chair to fight off any Martians with.

Re:I mean...

[edwardpickman]

Just mark the return ticket April 1st 2130. What are the odds he'll look at the return date before he leaves?

Re:I mean...

[Riktov]

Better yet, you could, through implanted memories, convince the person that he's not really going to Mars... or that he's already actually on Mars... that he's a secret agent on Mars...

Re:Nomination

[arb phd slp]

and that guy with the horribly loud voice that does those cleaning product commercials.

Oh those poor, poor NASA flight controllers.

Houston to Mars mission. Do you read, over?

BILLY MAYS HERE!!!

Re:I mean...

[renegadesx]

Ace Rimmer would stand up to the task

... what a guy!

Re:I mean...

[Provocateur]

Let's make it a quasi-reality show, then. So that it can be ratings-driven, commercially-viable, and even sponsored by anyone willing to buy air time or space time. It will have all the ingredients (the backbiting, sexual undertones) except for the amateur singing, and even make the nerds or geeks tune in because for chrissakes it's science and tech. They're fighting each other, trying to find out who the real--or better--astronaut is, that's manning the ship. The real deal, for instance, could be the ship is on autopilot, or piloted remotely. One episode could feature the ship going off-course for sh*ts and giggles. In the galley, even after you provide all the necessary ingredients to the computer, it will instead give you the perfect cup of tea. And to nudge everyone a little closer to the edge, the computer insists on calling everyone Dave, even after proper introductions have been made.

Re: Two? No, one.

[some guy I know]

i>Then it would be a one-way trip for two (or more) wouldn't it?

No, not if technology is advances enough to have Niven-style autodocs.
(I assume that you are typing about medicine; if you are typing about sex, have you not heard of celibacy?
Most people on this forum are, uh, "intimately" familiar with that term.)

Re:At least two?

[Anonymous Coward]

Four should be plenty. We went from two people to where we are today in 6000 years. And there was a great flood in there somewhere too.

Heinlein disagrees

[Anonymous Coward]

Terrible idea. What if they accidentally have a child, the mission goes wrong, and he has to be raised by Martians? He'd bring up all kinds of religious and political issues when he returned.

Animal zygotes?

[BalorTFL]

BTW, one weird idea would be to send a bunch of women and have them serve as incubators. In particular, if we send several missions of women AND zygotes, then we can grow a colony there. It may be a lot cheap approach to guarantee bio-diversity. In fact, I would think that once we have several small groups there, that we should send not just human zygotes, but also seeds and a number of animal zygotes. it would be useful for just in case.

Not to make any sweeping generalizations here, nor to imply anything about your pornographic preferences, but how many women do you know who'd be willing to give birth to livestock personally?

The real justification

[Captain Spam]

Sure, the summary might make it hard to fathom the sheer loneliness and inevitable disposability of the astronaut in question, but it stops just short of the key element. Quoth Mr. McLane immediately afterward:

"And to that end, I will humbly suggest the honor go to Dr. Horace Biggles, the professor in the office next to mine with lifelong dreams of exploration. I do not wish to toot my own horn and put on a humbler-than-thou air, but I am perfectly willing to forgo this amazing opportunity to my esteemed colleague. I am even willing to forgive him for his constant 'borrowing' of my office supplies, leaving the coffee pot empty, stealing every girl I have ever gone out with, and having the nerve to show me up at the space grant conference with his stupid, worthless moon buggy design that is so stupid and worthless and what're you gonna do with it on MARS, pretty boy? Huh? Yeah, let's see that Nobel Prize-winning super-efficient ventilation system of yours work in an iron-rich atmosphere! Advanced heat dissipation my ass!

"In conclusion, Dr. Biggles would be the perfect person to shoot off to Mars, alone, on a one-way trip. I believe we can begin testing tomorrow, before he gets to the coffee machine."

One-man, One-way Trip To Mars

[Anonymous Coward]

Sounds like a great, new reality TV series to me! Perhaps the TV networks could help finance...

Survivor: Mars

[ppanon]

Think of the possibilities!

For immunity contests you could have:

A Mt. Olympus climb,
Resource prospecting activities,
Water ice collection trips,
Locking down solar panels, antennas, and other breakables before dust storms,
Environment leak repair due to a puncture from a sandstorm.

The winner gets *$10 million*!

If there are hidden hostile intelligent martians, then you just keep the contestants around for a second season called "Lost: Mars"

Re:I mean...

[Agent__Smith]

You could get lots of volunteers this way, especially if you used the implanted memories to convince them that the women of the plannet have 3 boobs...

Re:One-way trip? Sure!

[Joe Tie.]

Being in the realm of science fiction, you can bet that in a fit of irony an immortality pill will be invented shortly after you leave. One which can't survive the trip to mars. What a twist!

Re:I mean...

[Orange Crush]

I'll probably get modded down for being such a pansy about home comforts and all . . . but I am rather partial to breathable air.

Re:A few very complicating points...

[19thNervousBreakdown]

debriefed

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Re:I mean...

[Brad1138]

I am rather partial to breathable air.

I take it you don't live in LA then?

Ark #3

[flyingfsck]

...then put all the hair dressers and telephone cleaners in it...

Re:I'd go.

[PopeRatzo]

I'll make my own interplanetary mission...with hookers, and blackjack.

What happens on Mars, stays on Mars.

Re:What's the point?

[Anonymous Coward]

No, they'll just cut your internet access.

Re:Not that expensive (or useful)

[Garridan]

See, that's the great thing about space. In space, there's no gravity. So if we have a dude on Mars, he can throw samples back to Earth. It doesn't matter how much they weigh, or how far away the Earth is -- without gravity, such things don't matter. Much cheaper than building a robot to do that -- additionally, a human will be less likely to get his wheels stuck in the mud when crossing slightly uneven terrain. Also, there's the matter of what kind of samples he throws -- a robot would just pick up rocks willy-nilly and throw them back to Earth. A human could look for pretty ones to throw.

Re:I mean...

[jericho4.0]

"This unhealthy obsession with safety and human life..."

Tell me you don't work in health care.

Re:One-way trip? Sure!

[SydShamino]

If you want to be remembered, you should stop going around incognit000.

Sorry, couldn't resist. =p I'm not sure I could do it, but I agree with your reasoning.

Re:A few very complicating points...

[Max Littlemore]

If you need plants, then you need them to pollinate and theirs no point in the astronomer spending his time being a garderer so your best of sending some bees.

ssssh man, this is /. If you're going suggest sending bees, at least make them robotic killer bees...

Re:I mean...

[patrixmyth]

You assume the other person waits to finish hearing what you have to say before talking back. Obviously, you're not married.

Re:I mean...

[david duncan scott]

No, Marsicans, but these aliens are really undocumented.

FUD?

[ZombieRoboNinja]

I mean, I guess Phobos has the "fear" covered...

Re:Mars is a much shorter trip than Magellan's

[Riktov]

2. Think of the robots.

Please, won't somebody?!

Re: Two? No, one.

[JustOK]

You must be new here.

Re: Two? No, one, v1.1.

[TheSpengo]

Psh, sex is overrated. We're nerds right? So long as he doesn't mind internet pages taking 10 minutes to load he's set, am I right? ;)

Re: Two? No, one.

[BorgCopyeditor]

Actually, a fair part of the population on Slashdot these days live in stable relationships and have kids. Me, i've got 3, but I think that's somewhat over-average.

I think it's safe to say that three relationships is a bit above average.

Re: Two? No, one.

[Eivind]

Said the one with UID 667.959 to the one with UID 15.695 ....

Re:Vote them off the planet

[Anonymous Coward]

If voters vote for a very disliked person, "such an event would unify the world as never before".

So we just tell Bush we're having another election... just don't tell him what it's for :)

Re:I'd go.

[KKlaus]

In fact, forget the interplanetary mission. And the blackjack. ...Somebody had to finish the joke.

Re:I'd go.

[nospam007]

I'll make my own interplanetary mission...with hookers, and blackjack.

What happens on Mars, stays on Mars.

That's sort of the point with one-way missions.

Re: Two? No, one.

[c0p0n]

...live in stable relationships and have kids. Me, i've got 3...

Whoah! Does that mean you had sex like, three times?? That's like, OMG, dude!! Can I be your friend?

Re: Two? No, one.

[Anonymous Cowpat]

/. ID's don't have to be integers anymore? When did this happen? Do the numbers have to be rational?
If they don't I call dibs on 3.1415926535 8979323846 2643383279 5028841971 6939937510 5820974944 5923078164 0628620899 8628034825 3421170679...

Minor Correction

[some guy I know]

"Some jokes never get old" should be "Some jokes never get old, except in Soviet Russia, where the old never get some jokes".

Re:One-way trip? Sure!

[flyingsquid]

My bigger gripe is people who say the 9/11 will always be remembered... and then can't name the day Pearl Harbor occurred (December 7, 1941). Yeah... memories are very generational.

I disagree. December 7 is the kind of historic event that lives forever in the national consciousness. No one in our nation is ever going to forget the day that our homeland was attacked by the cowardly Vietnamese.

Re:I mean...

[flyingsquid]

I say that we send our greatest national hero, George W. Bush. Just like the astronauts of old, he's a former fighter pilot, and this November, he's going to be looking for a new job, so the timing is perfect!

Re: Two? No, one.

[Oktober Sunset]

bah, doesn't mean he's not an Ebayer, could have just bought that character, some lamer who couldn't be arsed with grinding for XP.
Probably pays a chinese kid to karma whore for him during the night too.

Re: Living Alone

[hummassa]

I detected a minor inconsistency in your post:

I'm living with my parents now (because they're getting old and they need someone younger around to help out) and we get along great, but when the inevitable occurs, even though I'll miss them, I'll be fine living by myself again (until I get old myself, I guess).

is not really consistent with this:

Well, I've never had kids (except for a short span when I had a girlfriend living with me, and those were actually her kids, not mine), but that just means that I am doing my part to keep the human population on this planet down, plus I'm not in a financial sinkhole like many people who have kids.

Yeah, but you won't also have someone to take care of you when you get old. Hope you are using your savings to buy a nice "best age" condo in Del Boca Vista, with a lot of redhead nurses to tend to your needs... :-)

Re:I mean...

[Hognoxious]

They could just fake it all like they did with the moon la no carrier.

Re:Simple solution - send someone dying from cance

[bryanp]

The problem is, how do you find and train an individual that will die on schedule?

Tell him it is the will of Allah.

Re: Two? No, one, v1.1.

[Hal_Porter]

Dude, what about if you went there and your internet connection BROKE? That means NO MORE INTERNET EVER!

Re:Ex-presidents are well paid

[lupine]

I doubt anyone will be willing pay that much to hear what the current president has to say.
All his speeches are written for him and even then he has trouble with them thar multi-syllable words.

If anyone want to hear what bush had to say they would be better off hiring dick cheney.

Re: Getting Old

[Marcos Eliziario]

and the lower gravity will help in other ways, too.

Err... don't take offense, but viagra is a lot cheaper.