The Universe Damaged By Observation?

The Universe Damaged By Observation? 521

Posted by Zonk on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:05PM from the a-bit-deep-for-me dept.

ScentCone writes "The Telegraph covers a New Scientist report about two US cosmologists who suggest that, a la Schrodinger's possibly unhappy cat, the act of observing certain facets of our universe may have shortened its life . From the article: 'Prof Krauss says that the measurement of the light from supernovae in 1998, which provided evidence of dark energy, may have reset the decay of the void to zero — back to a point when the likelihood of its surviving was falling rapidly.'"

The Universe Damaged By Observation?

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So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

by Finallyjoined!!! ( 1158431 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:27PM (#21457005)

Will it revert?

Or will it turn into a dead cat in a box :-)

If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by starglider29a ( 719559 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:27PM (#21457007)

Do I also shorten the life of this post by reading it?

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by HeavensBlade23 ( 946140 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:30PM (#21457021)

Quick, someone mod him down before he shortens all of our lives!

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by Carthag ( 643047 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:32PM (#21457041) Homepage

I'm doing my share of shortening the life of the universe by increasing entropy. Right now I'm rubbing my hands together, both in glee, and to create excess heat. Muahahaha.

wah (Score:3, Funny)

by thhamm ( 764787 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:34PM (#21457059)

quick, lets draw up some pointless laws against this!

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

by flyingsquid ( 813711 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:35PM (#21457075)

God damn scientists, always threatening our existence with their curiosity! First they had to be all clever and go and invent the atomic bomb, and now they're threatening the entire universe. There's only one way to save ourselves. Quick, everyone grab your torches and sharpen your pitch forks! Everyone will meet in the local town or city center at sunset to form a mob, and then proceed to the local observatory!

I for one welcome... (Score:4, Funny)

by pwnies ( 1034518 ) * writes: <j@jjcm.org> on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:35PM (#21457077) Homepage Journal

What we don't realize is all this study into quantum mechanics is falling right into Schrodinger's cat's hands. It wants us to make him an undead kitty so it can open a hole in the universe and let the infinite number of possibilities of it all flow into this one, and thus will take over the world. The only way we'll win this future battle is if we observe it enough that it goes away.

X-Bender: Bender's a genius! (Score:5, Funny)

by JensenDied ( 1009293 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:36PM (#21457085)

Track Announcer: And the winner is ... Number 3, in a quantum finish.
Farnsworth: No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it!

Re:That's stupid (Score:3, Funny)

by cleatsupkeep ( 1132585 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:38PM (#21457099) Homepage

No fair!! You changed the outcome by measuring it!!

Of course! (Score:5, Funny)

by Jethro ( 14165 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:44PM (#21457153) Homepage

That explains a lot! Everytime I stare directly into a light source, the light goes away for a while! The stronger or more "pure" the light, the longer it is affected by me staring at it.

Why, a few years ago I stared directly into a laser pointer, and to this day whenever I point it back into that eye, it generates NO LIGHT AT ALL.

Re:On first glance... (Score:4, Funny)

by rootofevil ( 188401 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:47PM (#21457177) Homepage Journal

lots of things can escaped being changed. typically they are not proceeded with a ^ or /

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by Tablizer ( 95088 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:49PM (#21457193) Journal

Do I also shorten the life of this post by reading it?

Don't worry, dupes are on the way...

Let's hope God is a slashdot editor.

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:50PM (#21457203)

Cut it out, you madman!

SETI@Home is a terrorist plot (Score:5, Funny)

by Jah-Wren Ryel ( 80510 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:51PM (#21457205)

Finally! The proof I always knew existed!
SETI@Home is an Al Quaeda plot dedicated to the destruction of the universe!

Dark energy is telepathic (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @05:58PM (#21457273)

Don't you guys know anything? Dark energy is telepathic, like that pitcher plant on Voyager. It KNOWS when you're looking at it, doesn't like it, and might snuff out the universe from pure spite.

In order to appease it we must either a) outlaw astronomy and destroy all terrestrial, orbital, and extra-orbital equipment that might allow us to observe it or b) detonate all nuclear warheads on earth simultaneously thus killing the human race and all potential observers (that we know of). The latter might seem a bit extreme, but think about it: we are not only threatening this planet, but all planets everywhere. The end of Earth is a small price to pay to save the universe.

Re:consciousness does not... (Score:1, Funny)

by jimbojw ( 1010949 ) writes: <wilson DOT jim DOT r AT gmail DOT com> on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:01PM (#21457315) Homepage

Listen up, maggots. You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.

First you have to give up, first you have to *know*... not fear... *know*... that someday you're gonna die.

Maybe the ancients were on to something (Score:2, Funny)

by Tablizer ( 95088 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:07PM (#21457367) Journal

Let's throw a blond bikini virgin into a volcano to see if that fixes it. (She won't date any of us anyhow.)

Life imitates Douglas Adams (Score:3, Funny)

by howdoesth ( 1132949 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:08PM (#21457383)

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

Re:If that is true... (Score:4, Funny)

by Yetihehe ( 971185 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:08PM (#21457389)

Strange, when I rub my hands, there are only black, little, soft rods emerging. Is this dark matter everyone keeps talking about?

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:3, Funny)

by saintsfan ( 1171797 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:10PM (#21457401)

I agree. I'm no scientist, but it sounds like philosophy and science just had a nasty one night stand they will soon regret

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

by digitig ( 1056110 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:16PM (#21457475)

I agree. I'm no scientist, but it sounds like philosophy and science just had a nasty one night stand they will soon regret
Yes, I expect they would -- philosophy is a parent of science, so a one-night stand between the two would be a pretty bad idea.

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by ScentCone ( 795499 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:18PM (#21457491)

Do I also shorten the life of this post by reading it?

Dammit! I already made that joke when I submitted the article, and Zonk edited it out of my summary. I thought the whole thing was just silly, but it was such a good opportunity to be a smartass that I submitted it anyway. And look what happens. YOU get all the comedic karma. Perhaps the humor couldn't manifest itself until AFTER the submission had been observed? My original headline was "Mankind damages universe by looking at it," which was far more fun. Oh well.

Re:If that is true... (Score:3, Funny)

by Just Some Guy ( 3352 ) writes: <kirk+slashdot@strauser.com> on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:25PM (#21457543) Homepage Journal

You may not damage the universe, but I suggest you have your vision checked regularly.

How about Schrodinger cat? (Score:3, Funny)

by porky_pig_jr ( 129948 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:29PM (#21457579)

May be universe does not care about conscious observers, but cats sure do. Just try to observe any cat in your neighborhood and watch for its reaction.

We're in for it now (Score:3, Funny)

by Just Some Guy ( 3352 ) writes: <kirk+slashdot@strauser.com> on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:30PM (#21457585) Homepage Journal

The mice are gonna be pissed.

Perfect definition of Quantum Physics (Score:3, Funny)

by RingDev ( 879105 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:35PM (#21457627) Homepage Journal

In short, quantum physics kicks common sense right smack in the nuts.
That is perfect. Such phrases should be immortalized forever.

-Rick

Re:On first glance... (Score:3, Funny)

by Goaway ( 82658 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @06:38PM (#21457653) Homepage

Fliechmann and Ponsi tried to do cold fusion to me
You're making it sound so dirty.

Re:That's stupid (Score:3, Funny)

by Cyberax ( 705495 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @07:02PM (#21457897)

No, if there's nobody to hear it then the question does not make any sense - tree will exist in fallen and standing states simultaneously :)

But in the real world there's always some kind of 'observer'.

Re:Already Proposed (Score:3, Funny)

by Roblimo ( 357 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @07:05PM (#21457937) Homepage Journal

Actually, you need to be careful about reading observations in "fucking novels" AKA porn, or you will shorten your time to orgasm significantly, thereby proving that the cosmologists' theory applies to sex as much as to dark matter.

(No racial jokes about "dark matter," please. In the unlit box, all of Schroedinger's cats are grey.)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by Joebert ( 946227 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @07:09PM (#21457965) Homepage

If you keep doing that you'll go blind.

Re:Copenhagen interpretation (Score:3, Funny)

by cryptoluddite ( 658517 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @07:12PM (#21458003)

Waveform collapse is also called lazy evaluation. We're running in a simulation, get over it.

Damn you Norris ! (Score:4, Funny)

by Joebert ( 946227 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @07:18PM (#21458069) Homepage

On Haloween Chuck Norris tried to scare himself while looking in the mirror.
However since the resulting implosion of the universe was not able to account for the presense of Chuck Norris, it simply reset.

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

by Torvaun ( 1040898 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @07:29PM (#21458219)

Philosophy, Science, and Oedipus walk into a bar...

Re:The phrase (Score:3, Funny)

by MikeDirnt69 ( 1105185 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @07:47PM (#21458371) Homepage

Those scientists must think outside the box... :D

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

by mikkelm ( 1000451 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @08:04PM (#21458503)

Sorry, my town center only holds 10 workers, and they're terrible archers.

Re:If that is true... (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @09:32PM (#21459139)

The is no Slashdot editor.

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

by risk one ( 1013529 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @10:36PM (#21459509)

Ouch.

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

by risk one ( 1013529 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @10:39PM (#21459529)

Thus extending the life of the universe. Keep it up!

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:3, Funny)

by nacturation ( 646836 ) writes: <nacturation AT gmail DOT com> on Friday November 23, 2007 @11:26PM (#21459787) Journal

Everyone will meet in the local town or city center at sunset to form a mob, and then proceed to the local observatory!
Please be considerate and shield your torches from excess light pollution by enclosing the flame in red-tinted glass. Thanks, and remember to stop by the lobby for refreshments and souvenirs.

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

by eugene ts wong ( 231154 ) writes: on Friday November 23, 2007 @11:38PM (#21459845) Homepage Journal

...and the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here.".

Oedipus says, "Why not?".

The bartender says, "No, not you. You're okay. We tolerate your sexual lifestyle in this neighbourhood. As for you 2, you both are just plain nuts.".

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

by NaugaHunter ( 639364 ) writes: on Saturday November 24, 2007 @12:36AM (#21460151)

Well, it's not like any of them could see it coming.

Re:If that is true... (Score:2, Funny)

by Rebelgecko ( 893016 ) writes: on Saturday November 24, 2007 @02:26AM (#21460709)

Keep it up!
I've spent about 5 minutes trying to figure out whether or not that is intentional, bravo.

Descartes revisited.... (Score:3, Funny)

by MLease ( 652529 ) writes: on Saturday November 24, 2007 @06:01AM (#21461397)

"I observe, therefore I destroy!"

-Mike

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:3, Funny)

by Oktober Sunset ( 838224 ) writes: <sdpage103NO@SPAMyahoo.co.uk> on Saturday November 24, 2007 @08:01AM (#21461747)

The observer effect works on us too, if aliens are observing us, they will be affecting our planet. Which leads to only one conclusion... global warming is caused by too many aliens looking at us!

Re:If that is true... (Score:3, Funny)

by Joebert ( 946227 ) writes: on Saturday November 24, 2007 @12:28PM (#21463067) Homepage

exfoliating

Well now, that's a word I never thought I'd see here.
I'm a little hesitant to welcome our new exfoliating overloards.

Re:On first glance... (Score:3, Funny)

by rucs_hack ( 784150 ) writes: on Saturday November 24, 2007 @12:32PM (#21463101)

uh, Oxford doesn't have a department of nuclear physics [ox.ac.uk]

It used to, you changed the answer by observing it..

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So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

wah (Score:3, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

I for one welcome... (Score:4, Funny)

X-Bender: Bender's a genius! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:That's stupid (Score:3, Funny)

Of course! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:On first glance... (Score:4, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

SETI@Home is a terrorist plot (Score:5, Funny)

Dark energy is telepathic (Score:1, Funny)

Re:consciousness does not... (Score:1, Funny)

Maybe the ancients were on to something (Score:2, Funny)

Life imitates Douglas Adams (Score:3, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:4, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:3, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:3, Funny)

How about Schrodinger cat? (Score:3, Funny)

We're in for it now (Score:3, Funny)

Perfect definition of Quantum Physics (Score:3, Funny)

Re:On first glance... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:That's stupid (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Already Proposed (Score:3, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Copenhagen interpretation (Score:3, Funny)

Damn you Norris ! (Score:4, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

Re:The phrase (Score:3, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:1, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:3, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:4, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:5, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:2, Funny)

Descartes revisited.... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:So if I stop looking? (Score:3, Funny)

Re:If that is true... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:On first glance... (Score:3, Funny)

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