Purdue Unveils a Tricorder

aeoneal writes "According to Science Daily, mass spectrometry is no longer limited to what can be taken to the lab. Purdue researchers have created a device they liken to a tricorder, a handy 20-lb. device that combines mass spectrometry with DESI (desorption electrospray ionization), allowing chemical composition to be determined outside of a vacuum chamber. Purdue suggests this could be useful for everything from detecting explosive substances or cancer to predicting disease. Researcher R. Graham Cooks says, 'We like to compare it to the tricorder because it is truly a hand-held instrument that yields information about the precise chemical composition of samples in a matter of minutes without harming the samples.'"

Obligatory...

[garcia]

a handy 20-lb. device

"He's dead Jim."

"Well, I dropped the tricorder on his head."

smells like ... the future

[chriss]

In 1992 Harry Harrison (of SF fame) and Marvin Minsky (of AI fame) collaborated on The turing option [amazon.com], trying to merge Minsky's ideas about how an artificial mind could work with a SF story. Wasn't exactly a masterpiece, but there was an astonishing twist: In the book a brilliant scientist creates the first true AI and embeds it into a sort of fractal robot, whose arms are split into more arms like branches on a tree, ending with thousands of autonomous arms with their own vision each. And the first place this system is used (after being stolen): in agriculture, picking up bugs.

So I will predict the first mass use of Purdue's Tricorder: Japanese toilets!!! [wikipedia.org]. It can already recognize "biomarkers" in urine, so someone will build a cheap version of it into a toilet and every time you take a dump it will tell you what you should not have been eating, how sick you will be tomorrow and that if you continue that way your insurance won't cover your therapy. It will save the health systems billions.

.

Oh, and I'm serious about the toilet part.

pussies

[Penguinshit]

The research team has used the device to ... identify cocaine on $50 bills in less than 1 second.

REAL playas use Benjamins to snort blow!

Re:Obligatory...

[Anonymous Coward]

Now if they could make it for $20, I would buy it.

Still waiting for the TNG version

[El Cubano]

a handy 20-lb. device

Must be the ST:TOS version. At 20 lb, I would imagine that a shoulder strap is mandatory wear. Thanks, but I'll wait until the ST:TNG version hits.

Re:Take a good look..

[gardyloo]

Insightful. But it can go the other way: Many laptops these days are more like boat anchors. Well, the ones running Vista, anyway.

Re:Take a good look..

[gardyloo]

*clarification: Vista does not run well on boat anchors. They really prefer an Aqua interface.*

Re:pussies

[Prysorra]

Where'd they get the cocaine? And it's actually an important point - everything that requires knowing what an material is made of is bound to be used EVERYWHERE.

.......BEEP BEEP. ....MOM! Why is there broccoli in this??

detects explosive compounds

[Anonymous Coward]

the boston police should be happy about this

Re:Still waiting for the TNG version

[Anonymous Monkey]

but the black finish and chrome highlights...It's a classic design.

Doesn't seem very trek-like

[Anonymous Coward]

Data: Geordi, the Galorndon core is unstable. We need to beam you up to the Enterprise immediately.

Geordi: Hold on Data. I seem to be picking be picking residual biophotonic signatures on my tricorder... wait, it's still scanning. Let me get back to you in a few minutes.

The weight

[hack slash]

After carrying one of those around all day with a shoulder strap you'd welcome a Vulcan nerve pinch to ease the pain.

Looks like a...

[Anonymous Coward]

Spock: It looks like a toaster Jim.
Jim: Spock...what's a toaster?
Spock: It was a early 21st century tool for draining primitive power sources.
Jim: Why would they need such a tool?
Spock: The existence of such a tool defies logic Jim.
Dr. McCoy: YOU VILE EARTH BASHING VULCAN. Everything that was made by pre-space fairing human defies logic.
Dr. McCoy: I was used to prepare food, YOU POINTY-EARED AUTOMATON.

Jim: Oh look...toast

Re:IGEN Tricorder released in 2000

[Dunbal]

What does a viola have to do with anything?

      It's how drunk Frenchmen say "voila"...

Re:detects explosive compounds

[shigelojoe]

I don't know, I don't think it would be a good idea to send a 20-pound package to the Boston police marked "Warning: Sensitive Electronics".

Re:detects explosive compounds

[tchdab1]

>>the boston police should be happy about this

Why, does it also detect portable lighting displays?

Re:Obligatory...

[Dachannien]

On the plus side, if you get involved in any shirtless hand-to-hand combat with strangely humanoid aliens, you won't have to go looking for any styrofoam rocks.

Re:God damn, reminds me of my "portable" Kaypro

[encoderer]

"I wonder what the range is?"

It can go up to 11.

Re:pussies

[mastershake_phd]

Although... a terrorist would probably be using money that hasn't been in wide circulation - perhaps we could spot them by seeing if too much money any individual is carrying is devoid of drugs.
 
What a great logical conclusion. I can just see a politician/cop/prosecutor thinking this. Clean money = terrorist. Dirty money = drug user. Lockem up!

Re:detects explosive compounds

[Lord Ender]

the boston police should be happy about this

Sergeant: Sir, according to this device, the cartoon character is made of plastic. If I remember my extensive training at community college correctly, bombs can be made of plastic explosives. I recommend we shut down the city and destroy all the cartoon characters at great expense to the taxpayers.

Mayor: Sergeant, why waste all the taxpayer's time and money on a few lamps?

Sergeant: Cause fuck em, that's why.

Mayor: Excellent.

Re:Obligatory...

[Anonymous Coward]

Looks like a Soviet miniaturized tricorder.

No wireless. Less space than a nomad. Lame.

[Anonymous Coward]

a handy 20-lb. device

No wireless. Less space than a nomad. Lame.