No Billboards in Space

An anonymous reader writes "CNN is reporting that the Federal Aviation Administration proposed Thursday to amend its regulations to ensure that it can enforce a law that prohibits 'obtrusive' advertising in zero gravity." From the article: "For instance, outsized billboards deployed by a space company into low Earth orbit could appear as large as the moon and be seen without a telescope, the FAA said. Big and bright advertisements might hinder astronomers."

In other news..

[AndOne]

Europe annouces a space billboard initiative. Part of this initiative involves a unilateral declaration that any attempt to remove their billboards will be seen as an act of agression. Followed by what sounded like muffled laughter.

Coming next month... WalMart banned in space

[Anonymous Coward]

The FAA will conclude that WalMart in space would hurt local merchants.

Re:Huh?

[YetAnotherAnonymousC]

The politicians and bueraucrats will be enforcing it... we'll be firing them into space at the billboards! =)

Disc-shaped ads...

[jemenake]

If they occupy as much solid-angle as the moon, then they could eclipse the sun (or moon). Can you imagine disc-shaped billboards? I can see it now... "This eclipse brought to you by Coca-Cola!" Better yet, "All your photons are belong to us". - Joe

Country's flags

[CrazyJim1]

Imagine if China put its flag in orbit. What is the US going to do, shoot it down?

Re:Huh?

[vwjeff]

I hope ads do appear in space. We can then use them as target practice. ICBM target practice, that is.

Buy Jupiter, but leave at least one moon.

[Tackhead]

> be seen without a telescope
>
> So we could still make a deal if aliens drop by wanting to buy Jupiter. [mac.com]

Jupiter? Yeah, we at AlienClick [mttp://1.3.9.27.81.243] can do that. In fact, all these worlds can be yours for $39.99 per line, except Europa, which has been reserved by a prior bidder.

Re:Commie advertisements?

[SafteyInNumbers]

Team America: World police http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0372588/ [imdb.com] FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!

Re:Rats.

[LordSnooty]

Why, are you about to execute a file? In space?

Re:Huh?

[kfg]

Dude, you just have to keep up with the memos. I think you'll find this one actually under the leopard. He likes to sit on odd bits of paper.

The whole thing reminds me of a 20 or 30 year old Playboy cartoon though. Two guys are standing on a highrise balcony looking at the moon, which, instead of "The Man in the Moon" displays a Playboy rabbit head logo and one is saying to the other:

"I wonder how much it cost him?"

I guess it'll mean war with the Lunatics when they actually do it, for deploying Weapons of Mass Delusion, or something.

KFG

Re:The USA owns space?

[Kinky Bass Junk]

I'm pretty sure Dubya stated that he wants to bring democracy to the country of Space.

Re:Buy Jupiter?

[Anonymous Coward]

He already does.

Re:Country's flags

[maczealot]

Pretty much yep. Especially if it is visible from the U.S. and/or interferes with any of our satellites or other devices.

Seriously though, why would China do this? *boggle* To advertise their government: "Look everybody, its Communism Lite, now with half the fanatical controlling of markets for the priviledged few!"

Old and silly Joke

[elgrinner]

An American Officer runs up to his superior and says excitedly: "Sir, Sir! The Soviets have painted the moon red, what should we do?"
After a little contemplation the man replied: "Take a bucket of white paint to the moon and write Coca Cola on it."

Units

[Anonymous Coward]

Oops, meant 34,000 KM there, not miles, sorry. Maybe I should work for NASA.

The rules

[agent0range_]

1) arrive first

2) arrive armed

There! you own space! Works for solar systems, planets, moons, asteroids. Quite simple, really.

I was hoping to make a fortune selling rocket-propelled 'adblockers' but now I have to think of another get-rich-quick scheme.

oblig...

[Andy Gardner]

Since the beginning of time man has yearned to destroy the sun. I will do the next best thing...block it out!
[presses a button raising a shield over the model town]

Re:The DOT needs to do the same

[R.Mo_Robert]

I forget where it was, but I recently read a claim (by some advertiser, IIRC--go figure) that these huge billboards in rural interstate and interstate-ish driving help drivers by breaking the monotony .

No, I don't really believe it ... but I really just read this somewhere. Wish I could find the source now...

Inevitably...

[setirw]

"That's no moon... that's an oversized advertisement for the next generation Whopper(tm)"

So much for my Spread Firefox Idea...

[Anonymous Coward]

Darn!

Zapping

[orzetto]

Ah, the pleasure of shutting down ads with nuclear weapons... It gives the concept of zapping an entirely new meaning!

What?!? No "CHA" on the moon?

[FrankieBoy]

Chairface Chippendale will be real disappointed.

SPOON!!!!

I can see the headlines now...

[Bones3D_mac]

George Lucas sues AT&T after logo in space is confused with the Death Star.

Re:Disc-shaped ads...

[dustmite]

Hmm .. I think you may have struck upon the answer to global warming, just have dozens of orbiting ads that block the sun for a few hours total each day ..

Meanwhile, back in the 70s..

[henni16]

..somewhere at the NASA:

"Sir! Sir! The Russians! The Commies have started to paint the moon red! What shall we do?!"

"Hmm...don't stop them. Load up a shuttle with white paint and when they are finished we'll go up and write 'Coca Cola' on it."

Re:Huh?

[Harker]

"We are not in anybody's airspace. There is no air.

H.

Re:In other news..

[Catamaran]

Don't forget the French have got the bomb. And the Brits.

The French don't have the Brits, we do. Get your facts straight.

Re:Launch sites.

[Dirtside]

Yes, I'm sure the U.S. government would sit there and do nothing. I mean, it's not like us to, say, blow something up if we feel it threatens us. :)

Moon Sponsored by Pepsi(TM)...

[gellenburg]

The Sun is being presented to you today by Sun Microsystems. "Use Solaris. Please! Hey, we even run Linux!"

Mercury is being presented to you this evening by the new Oral-B Thermometer.

Venus is being presented to you by Arista Records... home to Abba! (1)

The Earth is being presented to you this evening by Miracle-Gro. Your lawn will thank you.

Mars is being presented to you this evening by M&M/ Mars Candies. Because sometimes you feel like a nut!

Jupiter is being presented to you this evening by Jupiter Research, because we really really want to know what you think!

Saturn is being presented to you this evening by On Star! Who will call 9-1-1 when *your* airbags deploy?

Neptune is being presented to you this evening by Microsoft. When do you want your computer to crash, today?

Uranus is being presented to you this evening by Preparation-H. It's not just for removing bags from a model's eyes you know!

Pluto is being presented to you this evening by Walt Disney World. Celebrate the magic!

--

(1) Who gives a shit if Abba is signed with Arista or not. Don't be so anal-retentive.

Re:Huh?

[Jeff DeMaagd]

If a US company is behind it, then it would be easy to prosecute. If a non-US company was behind it, I don't think it would be difficult to find some means to accidentally destroy it.

Re:Astronomers?!

[jag2k]

It's like internet spam. The first few times they do it it will be a novelty, then nobody will use spam because it's not worth it.

Oh, wait, something's going overhead now:

'Erectile problems? Reach this sign with FREE VIAGRA!!!'

I'm glad we didn't regulate the skies...

Re:Huh?

[quarkscat]

Darn right!
Stick an oversized billboard in space and the next
thing you know, some hillbilly country with nukler
tipped missiles will be taking pot-shots at it.
Shebang!
Next thing you know, there goes the whole neighborhood...

Re:Huh?

[kulakovich]

I am told that the proper spelling is pwn3d.

kulakovich

Apollo 666?

[Anonymous Coward]

Well, turn the Sun black (eclipse it?) and the moon red with space-based advertising and you might be able to trigger Armaggedon :)

Re:Huh?

[NitsujTPU]

I think that you're overreacting.

**My Opinion, brought to you by X10**

Re:Zapping

[Muhammar]

"Ah, the pleasure of shutting down ads with nuclear weapons... It gives the concept of zapping an entirely new meaning!"

In ..... ......, concave satelite addboards are zapping you!

Re:Huh?

[Anonymous Coward]

> Also, outlawing it here in the US

here, where?

Oh yeah, Sorry, I forgot the internet is in America!

Re:Huh?

[igny]

ICBM target practice

Instead of inter-continental ballistic missiles. It should be called AAM, Air-to-Ad-Missiles.