The Shuttle Mission No One Wants

Fourmica writes "USA Today (by way of TechNewsWorld) has a surprisingly insightful look at the planned 'rescue option' for Discovery's upcoming launch. The plan, which has been mentioned here before, is to have the crew hole up on the ISS until Atlantis can launch to bring them home. My question is, why shove everyone into the ISS? Why not just dock with it, and share the life support supplies between the two systems, instead of cramming everyone into the station?" See this earlier story on the same topic.

double dock and share?

[Anonymous Coward]

Sounds good to me. It ain't like this shit is rocket science

Easy solution

[natrius]

There's an easy solution to the funding problem. It normally would hurt to throw away a $3 billion shuttle, but not if you take the right precautions in advance.

Pass a law giving NASA the sole movie rights to the rescue mission.

That by itself won't even be enough to cover the cost. But wait... there are 293,027,571 Americans according to Google. At $10 a ticket, that pretty much covers it. But how do you get everyone to watch it?

Pass a law that revokes the citizenship of anyone who can't present the ticket stub for the movie on request.

I really need to get into policy work.

Re:RC Landing?

[porp]

I hope if they do try such a neat thing as land a damaged Shuttle under remote control that they do it over your house instead of mine. I like my roof and all my stuff inside.

porp

If Mohammed cannot come to the mountain...

[abb3w]

On the one hand, re-entry is the most dangerous part of the mission after initial launch, and most of the scenarios involve discovering that the shuttle has developed a defect that will not allow it (and the crew) to survive that reentry. On the other hand, the shuttle's computer can probably be programmed to do a timed minimal dock-and-move-off burn without a human aboard. On the gripping hand, the space station also has thrusters for minor maneuvering; it might be possible to undock, and then move the station.

Mind you, that last wouldn't be pretty, but this is already an emergency scenario. In such cases, people think way outside the box, equipment gets used for alternate purposes, and plans get modified. Sometimes literally.

"All right, Aquarius, this is Houston. do you have the flight plan up there?"

"Affirmative, Andy. Jack's got one right here."
"Okay, we have a... an unusual procedure for you here. We need you to rip the cover off."

Disclaimer: I am not an astronaut, I just work with one.

Re:Answer

[mat catastrophe]

So, do you suppose that somewhere in NASA's big manual of back up plans there is a page that says:

1. Other incidents not yet mentioned...
2. ???
3. Mission saved!

Re:Easy solution

[Anonymous Coward]

With the way things are going, I think you'd have people losing their stubs on purpose.

Re:uh...no

[B3ryllium]

So ... uh ... what you're saying is that NASA should use terr'ists as astronauts?

Then have everyone root for the shuttle to get destroyed?

Sounds like a fun way to end-of-life the shuttle program - and justify the "Star Wars" program - all at once.

Re:Orbital Penal Colony

[B3ryllium]

Ooh, and there's a ton of history and sci-fi flicks to tell us all the things that could go wrong with this plan, so we can accomodate the most common oversights. I like the way you think, Orbital Penal Colony Alpha Security Guard iamlucky13.

Re:Answer

[tomhudson]

After all they ate the extra food, not the space station.

That's to be expected. The space station isn't exactly edible, you know ...

Re:Answer

[coopex]

Scene: Really important looking high tech meeting room, deep in the bowels of JSC. The acting administrator Frederick D. Gregory, chief scientian Dr. James B. Garvin, chief of staff John D. Schumacher, chief safety and mission assurance office Bryan D. O'Connor, and the head of the shuttle program William Parsons, as well as several less important figures are huddled around a single computer. Suddenly, Gregory gasps.
"My God!", he exclaims.
The others all crowd even closer together to try to get a look, which would have been difficult even without the mass of people due to the thick smoke that had gathered over the course of this marathon meeting.
Gregory regains his composure, and trying to keep as dignified as possible stammers out, "lostwanderer147 doesn't think we know what we're doing."
A hush falls over the assembled chiefs of NASA.
He contines. "He says we're in a death spiral, and unless something big happens soon, the US space program will be history."
There's a low murmer as they discuss what must be done, but almost immediately Schumacher has a solution.
"We've got to contact this lostwanderer147, and give him full control of NASA, as he alone is our hope for a future."
Everyone agrees, and they set about trying to find him.
Tragically, his email address is not displayed with his postings or profile, and NASA is no more.

Re:Sorry for pointing out the obvious...

[Alex Belits]

And the prize for missing the point in the most spectacular manner in the whole Slashdot history goes to... Anonymous Coward.

Outsource

[t_allardyce]

NASA could out-source its astronauts - maybe to boy bands, telemarketers, lawyers or politicians? give them some training, do just about everything else by remote control, and if something goes wrong there's no need for a rescue mission? just saying, put it there on the table as an option.