Space Station Crew Forced to Cut Calories

gollum123 writes "CNN and others are reporting that food is running so low aboard the international space station that both the crew members have been asked to cut their calories, at least until a Russian supply ship arrives in a little over two weeks. The situation is so bad that if a Russian cargo vessel scheduled to arrive on Dec. 25 has a mishap or is significantly delayed, the astronauts, one American and one Russian, will have to abandon the station and return home months ahead of schedule. An independent team is looking into how the food inventory ended up being tracked so poorly and how it can be improved in the future."

Space McDonalds?

[grazzy]

.. where are they when you need them?

Weightless Weight Loss

[axonal]

Wow, talk about strict dieting. Makes me wish I was up there, I know I could loose some of the weight gained from endless amounts of caffeinated drinks...

Christmas

[pklong]

"a Russian cargo vessel scheduled to arrive on Dec. 25". So they won't me missing out on the brussel sprouts this year. Poor sods :)

Simple explanation

[Anonymous Coward]

[...] looking into how the food inventory ended up being tracked so poorly [...]

Hey, even astronauts can get the munchies!

Its those fat americans

[Anonymous Coward]

see its true

they have already eaten the others

[Anonymous Coward]

posting anonymously due to grossness.

Open sauce application here?

[King_of_Prussia]

IIRC, the database software that tracks the food inventories on board the space station and the space shuttle on longer flights runs on proprietary code. Perhaps if the software were revamped, and open source software used instead the community could help out a little? Many eyes make for few bugs -- and when the bugs are as easy to spot as the "food" entry reading zero I see no reason to put up with badly written, unfree software.

Hell, with the savings made they could probably upgrade the menus a bit, instead of eating paste three times a day they could afford to buy the astronauts some hot grits or something equally tasty once in a while.

This has got to be one of the few jobs ....

[kernelblaha]

...where finishing ahead of schedule is a bad thing!

Maybe the astronauts jus ate too much all year so that they can be back home for Christmas turkey.

Survivor!

[nacturation]

Why not turn it into a new reality TV show, a la Survivor? This could easily provide a smidgen of the funding to keep the space station going. And instead of voting people off the space station, the person who loses a challenge gets eaten, so the food situation practically solves itself.

Who ate all the pies?

[Anonymous Coward]

"An independent team is looking into how the food inventory ended up being tracked so poorly and how it can be improved in the future."

Looks like they have one Mr. H Simpson aboard!
Mmmmm space doughnuts... Woohoo! I've lost 95lbs! Woohoo! Mmmmm freeze dried christmas cake... mmm... Woohoo I'm still 0lbs!

Just don't let him get at the ant colony.

Re:Weightless Weight Loss

[krymsin01]

You could also have lots of sex... oh wait..

Re:Space McDonalds?

[CortoMaltese]

And here I thought you could order pizza, delivered, anywhere. You know, free delivery if you order two or more pizzas.

"Hi, this is Leroy Chiao... I'd like to order two Quattro Stagiones, delivered, please... and put in some extra oregano, we're running low on that... International Space Station, in the orbit... yes, that's the one. Please hurry. Thanks, bye."

Re:Raiding the fridge...

[R.Caley]

They should never have included those suspicious looking brownies in the last supply run.

You're making this WAY too easy

[upside]

Must ... resist ... comment ... about English food.

I'm proud of myself, but the effort at self-restraint gave me a headache.

Re:Eat poop

[ajs318]

That's like the British astronaut who was visiting the Mir space station and asked the resident Russian cosmonauts what they did for entertainment. "Oh, we have a bottle of vodka," said one of the Russkies. "Would you like a shot?" The Brit took a swig from the bottle. "It tastes a bit weak," he remarked, "I expected real Russian vodka to have a bit more kick!" "Well," said one of the Russians, "It's been through each of us six times already!"

Re:Sick joke...

[b0r0din]

Hey I know the Iraqi Information Minister's second cousin. I mean, he's my second cousin. And he's fucking hilarious. Get it straight, man. Stop spreading disinformation on the Internet, the one place everyone can find tons of true, undisputed facts. The one place on earth (aside from Iraq of course) I am truly at home.

- Iraqi Information Minster

P.S. Iraq rules, long live Saddam! America will never defeat Iraq! Baghdad will never be taken! Death to the Infidels, and...

Shit, gotta go.

Re:Great

[thhamm]

just change the gravitational constant of the universe!

new mother's saying...

[nigham]

finish your food kiddo... there are hungry astronauts in space.

Re:Space McDonalds?

[skaffen42]

I'm pretty sure midnight snacking is what caused this problem. I mean, the ISS goes around the earth quite a few times every 24 hours, and the station probably experiences night every time. Now astronauts are by definition geeks, and I have never met a true geek who can keep themselves from heading to the snack cupboard at around midnight. Just think about how much snacking they end up doing and it is amazing their food supplies lasted as long as it did.

As for McDonalds in space... no, no, no. That is how it starts. First the midnight snacking, then you start doing late night runs to McDonalds, then you have to buy the bigger space suit.

Why Base it on Calories?

[syntap]

Don't we all know by now it's the CARBS that count and not calories?

My best sig is this one.

Re:Space Takeout?? and From the Article

[FlopEJoe]

"...including some Asian delicacies -- dim sum dumplings..."

Wrong, wrong, wrong. Don't they realize if they eat Chinese take out they'll just be hungry in a half hour? It's not rocket science, people!

Obligatory José Jimenez joke

[Dammital]

Live at the Hungry i, circa 1961 --

Q: I would imagine that food is a major problem on a trip into outer space...

A: ... it is, you know! They only allow you to have the ten ounces of food.

Q: Only ten ounces?

A: Yah.

Q: Well, how will you manage?

A: I'll eat out...

Hunger Strike

[thewiz]

If the astronauts are upset that NASA screwed up the food supply, they could always rebel and go on a hunger strike.
Uh, wait..That's what NASA wants them to do...

Spliff's in Space?

[El_Smack]

Upside: No drug laws in space.
Downside: You still get the munchies.

Eat your vegetables, Johnny

[chris_mahan]

motherly order a the dining table:
"Now Johnny, finish your vegetables. Don't you know the astronauts on the space station don't have enought to eat?"

Re:Great

[Un pobre guey]

just change the gravitational constant of the universe!

No, just change from English to metric. That ought to do it.