Chinese Satellite Crashes Into House

Chinese Satellite Crashes Into House 406

Posted by timothy on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:51PM from the in-china-no-less dept.

toggleflipflop writes "In China, a returning satellite crashed into a house. No one was hurt. More details in this article. Apparently inhabited by an eternal optimist: 'The satellite landed in our home. Maybe this means we'll have good luck this year,' the tenant of the wrecked apartment was quoted as saying by the newspaper. According to the People's Daily's article on the subject nothing seems to have gone wrong."

Chinese Satellite Crashes Into House

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Nothing wrong? (Score:5, Funny)

by octal666 ( 668007 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:52PM (#10551301)

Are they meaning the house-crashing was on schedule?

next year (Score:5, Funny)

by morcheeba ( 260908 ) * writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:53PM (#10551307) Journal

Boy, is that guy going to be disappointed next year when a satellite doesn't crash into his house. Bad luck all year!

So.. (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:54PM (#10551317)

Do they get to keep the satellite ??

Finders Keepers..
Loosers Weepers..

it could get worse... (Score:5, Funny)

by selderrr ( 523988 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:55PM (#10551327) Journal

in belgium, some 10 years ago, a russian Mig bonkered into a house after the pilot did an emergency jump out some 5000km away above russian territory... Imagine sitting at the table and all of a sudden a warhead plops on your plate. not to mention the secret service eating your guts out 20mins later.

I'm too lazy, otherwise I would google some info about it. No doubt soe karma whore will do it below

Hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

by physicsphairy ( 720718 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:56PM (#10551335)

"People's Daily's article on the subject nothing seems to have gone wrong."
"In China, a returning satellite crashed into a house"
They built a satellite designed to crash into a house? OK...

Definitely insured (Score:5, Funny)

by travdaddy ( 527149 ) writes: <`travo' `at' `linuxmail.org'> on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:57PM (#10551343)

Apparently inhabited by an eternal optimist: 'The satellite landed in our home. Maybe this means we'll have good luck this year.'

Hmm, must have had good insurance... and a crappy house.

The roof is on fire! (Score:5, Funny)

by Kenshin ( 43036 ) writes: <kenshin@lunarOPENBSDworks.ca minus bsd> on Sunday October 17, 2004 @02:59PM (#10551366) Homepage

We don't need no water, let the motherf***er burn!

Burn, motherf***er, burn!

Re:next year (Score:4, Funny)

by kingkade ( 584184 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:02PM (#10551387)

When the guy was saying everything was OK and generally being all happy-go-lucky about it, you could probably notice there was a red laser beam aimed at his temple. 'You used to be cool China, what happened?'

In Communist China..... (Score:5, Funny)

by reality-bytes ( 119275 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:03PM (#10551399) Homepage

In Communist China the satellite lands on you!

.....oh wait

Re:I don't understand (Score:5, Funny)

by morcheeba ( 260908 ) * writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:03PM (#10551401) Journal

No, of course they didn't plan on landing it on this guy's roof. Check out the picture [xinhuanet.com] -- they were obviously aiming for the courtyard, and, if you ask me, they did a really good job of getting pretty close.

Re:Out of luck (Score:2, Funny)

by ikea5 ( 608732 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:03PM (#10551405)

"Does China even have a lottery?"
Sure they do, and the first prize is a baby boy.

Re:So.. (Score:5, Funny)

by wicka_wicka ( 679279 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:03PM (#10551407)

I don't think that's communist policy. Losers keepers. Finders stabbed in the face.

Re:Nothing wrong? (Score:5, Funny)

by gl4ss ( 559668 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:04PM (#10551413) Homepage Journal

no, it's just chinaspeak for "our lives are ruined and the party won't pay us a dime".

Subcontracted... (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:07PM (#10551430)

Must of subcontracted to the same guys who outsourced parts for Genesis.

Chinese Contractor: Here! We have parts left over from american space craft!
Chinese Space Agency: Well, don't just stand there, send them to us!

[3 Years Later]

Genesis: The ground sure is coming up fast! I wonder why my chutes have gon.... GAK!

[2 Month Later]

Chinese Space Craft: The ground sure is coming up fast! I wonder why my chutes have gon.... GAK!

Political opposition (Score:2, Funny)

by Raynach ( 713366 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:10PM (#10551442) Homepage

Well, that's ONE way to silence political opposition in a repressive regime...
Maybe other countries will take notice and start expanding their space programs... just to drop "errant" pieces of spacecraft on dissenters.

Re:No thanks. (Score:5, Funny)

by Zardus ( 464755 ) writes: <yans@yancomm.net> on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:14PM (#10551474) Homepage Journal

I don't particularly mind satellites, as long as they come in through the front door, whipe their feet on the welcome mat, and politely drink their tea. Its the kind that crash through your roof or window that I can't stand. They're just plain rude.

Re:Nothing wrong? (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:20PM (#10551512)

Off course nothing is wrong.
The satellite capsule survived.

Loony Toons.. (Score:5, Funny)

by Mastadex ( 576985 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:22PM (#10551528)

Are we sure this guy didnt have a really big high powered ACME magnet pointed straight up??

Now thats what I call DirecTV! (Score:4, Funny)

by XeXeN ( 48797 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:24PM (#10551537)

Is that their new dedicated subscription?

Re:No thanks. (Score:5, Funny)

by JasontheMason ( 654429 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:26PM (#10551548) Homepage

Personally, I'd rather have bad luck and no bird shit on my head (or satellites in my house)
So, what if the bad luck was something like, um, a satellite falling through your roof?

JtM

Ohhh (Score:3, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:35PM (#10551606)

So thats why the box at the end of my dish is called a satellite receiver...

returning to earth....... (Score:3, Funny)

by bendsley ( 217788 ) writes: <moc]tod[eibaolf]ta[darb> on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:36PM (#10551613) Homepage

i guess the chinese didn't want to be outdone by the US crashing a probe into the Nevada desert.

Re:That's better than the Russians! (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:39PM (#10551630)

Oh, you mean like FOX-News?

Obviously, (Score:5, Funny)

by quarkscat ( 697644 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:43PM (#10551660)

the crashing satellite improved his
home's Feng Shui. As a bonus, it
also drove out all the evil spirits.
Give the man a break, already.

Re:No thanks. (Score:3, Funny)

by metlin ( 258108 ) * writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:48PM (#10551692) Journal

Actually, Satellites crashing may not be a bad idea.

I could sell one of these things off ebay and buy me some sweet loving.

But I suspect that in China, the only sweet lovin' I'd get would be from them gubmint men in red.

Communist News Translation Service (Score:4, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:53PM (#10551709)

The satellite destroyed the building in Sichuan province, but officials say no-one was hurt.

Officials say that no one with families powerful enough to demand reperations from the government was hurt.

"The satellite landed in our home. Maybe this means we'll have good luck this year," the tenant of the wrecked apartment was quoted as saying by the newspaper.

"The satellite landed in our neighbor's home. Since the government is making us say we lived there, maybe they'll make sure we have good luck this year to keep us from blabbing."

For the benefit of the humor-impaired and tinfoil-hat crowd... I'm joking.

Re:The roof is on fire! (Score:3, Funny)

by Kenshin ( 43036 ) writes: <kenshin@lunarOPENBSDworks.ca minus bsd> on Sunday October 17, 2004 @03:54PM (#10551719) Homepage

Who's dumber? Me, or you for spending all the time to type that up in an effort to lecture me on some socio-cultural cliché?

Don't like stars? Ok, fine, you stupid-ass motherfucker.

House for sale. (Score:5, Funny)

by Eevee ( 535658 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @04:21PM (#10551846)

It's a fixer-upper, but it gets excellent satellite reception.

Uhhhh somehow I doubt he said that voluntarily.... (Score:3, Funny)

by deglr6328 ( 150198 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @04:26PM (#10551875)

Or said it at all, for that matter.

"The satellite landed in our home. Maybe this means we'll have good luck this year"....."oh look! the excess hydrazine is spilling from the ruptured fuel tanks! What gloriousness, the great revolution truly has delivered blessings from heaven upon us! A thousand thanks to you Wen Jiabao!"....."my family's belongings are pulverized and burning with such splendid red flame! such must be divine providence showing we have truly reaped the benefits of the Great Leap Forward! We are so thankful for all the wonderfull fortune bestowed upon us from the eternally benevolent Great Government! I only wish I could have been present in the house at the time this wonderful sanctification occured!!!"

His quote was censored.. (Score:3, Funny)

by Deal-a-Neil ( 166508 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @04:30PM (#10551892) Homepage Journal

..what Huo Jiyu REALLY said was, "Damn this government and their sweat shop mass production satellites! If there were only democracy, capitalism and competitive markets in the Chinese aerospace industry, this wouldn't have happened to me... WHY ME?? Fortune comes in threes, so I can't WAIT for what's in store for my next two."

Lucky? (Score:2, Funny)

by d3ity ( 800597 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @04:30PM (#10551893)

Where does that idiot get off thinking he's going to have good luck this year. Oh, crap, wait. Confusious say he who gets hit by satelite have direct TV free for one year.

Re:I don't understand (Score:5, Funny)

by RALE007 ( 445837 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @04:58PM (#10552033)

Someone please explain this to me. Did they plan on crashing the thing into this guy's roof?
Yes, that was the exact purpose of the mission. You see the guy had been evading taxes, and well, the Chinese can be known to go a bit overboard when making a point. It was a two part mission really, to show how precisely they can land their satellites, and to remind the population that they had better pay their f*&#ing taxes. Any other bright questions you need answers to?

Re:First Image (Score:4, Funny)

by jav1231 ( 539129 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @05:26PM (#10552152)

When have they? You smoke to much crack...or not enough. I'm not sure which it is with you, but you don't smoke the right amount.

Comment removed (Score:1, Funny)

by account_deleted ( 4530225 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @06:10PM (#10552353)

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:I don't understand (Score:5, Funny)

by rts008 ( 812749 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @06:15PM (#10552377) Journal

Don't blame them, I wouldn't want to go into the desert either. This way it's easy to locate!

Re:next year (Score:3, Funny)

by kingkade ( 584184 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @06:46PM (#10552504)

Big developements in defense technology are a direct consequence of individualism. People are now less willing to die for their country therefore soldiers are now more and more removed from direct conflict.

Well fuck it, if it means spending a ridiculous amount of money on defense, I'd rather sit safely at home while Optimus Prime takes enemy fire.

of course it's lucky (Score:3, Funny)

by gelfling ( 6534 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @07:11PM (#10552679) Homepage Journal

what are the odds of that happening again??

Agreed. But the mail... (Score:3, Funny)

by 955301 ( 209856 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @07:15PM (#10552702) Journal

The real problem in China has nothing to do with the space programs precision in retrieving equipment from orbit.

It's the mail service; the flyer explaining to the house owner that they were intending to land the capsule in his courtyard hadn't been received yet.

fishy (Score:2, Funny)

by wikinerd ( 809585 ) writes: on Sunday October 17, 2004 @08:21PM (#10553021) Journal

Just a year ago China was saying that it would build bases on Moon. And now one of their satellites crashed on someone's home.
there is something fishy here...

Re:next year (Score:3, Funny)

by G-funk ( 22712 ) writes: <josh@gfunk007.com> on Sunday October 17, 2004 @08:33PM (#10553056) Homepage Journal

Plenty of Americans can't speak english, so why should the Chinese be any different?

Probably (Score:2, Funny)

by antoy ( 665494 ) writes: <alexis@thMOSCOWenull.net minus city> on Sunday October 17, 2004 @11:40PM (#10553887)

The man confessed to have uttered "How can things get any worse" a second before the satellite crashed into his house.

How convenient! (Score:2, Funny)

by Ivan Todoroski ( 132826 ) writes: <grnch@gmx.net> on Monday October 18, 2004 @01:24AM (#10554236)

I was amazed to find a "Comment on the story" link at the bottom of the People's Daily article. Could it be? They would actually allow people to freely post their opinion on their prominent site?

Well, I wrote a comment asking why the minor fact of the satellite crashing through someone's freaking living room was silently ommited, but when I tried to submit it I got a page saying "Database query error"...

How convenient!

Haiku (Score:2, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday October 18, 2004 @07:44AM (#10555040)

cherry blossom falls
like satellite onto roof
better luck next year

There may be more comments in this discussion. Without JavaScript enabled, you might want to turn on Classic Discussion System in your preferences instead.

Nothing wrong? (Score:5, Funny)

next year (Score:5, Funny)

So.. (Score:5, Funny)

it could get worse... (Score:5, Funny)

Hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

Definitely insured (Score:5, Funny)

The roof is on fire! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:next year (Score:4, Funny)

In Communist China..... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:I don't understand (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Out of luck (Score:2, Funny)

Re:So.. (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Nothing wrong? (Score:5, Funny)

Subcontracted... (Score:5, Funny)

Political opposition (Score:2, Funny)

Re:No thanks. (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Nothing wrong? (Score:1, Funny)

Loony Toons.. (Score:5, Funny)

Now thats what I call DirecTV! (Score:4, Funny)

Re:No thanks. (Score:5, Funny)

Ohhh (Score:3, Funny)

returning to earth....... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:That's better than the Russians! (Score:1, Funny)

Obviously, (Score:5, Funny)

Re:No thanks. (Score:3, Funny)

Communist News Translation Service (Score:4, Funny)

Re:The roof is on fire! (Score:3, Funny)

House for sale. (Score:5, Funny)

Uhhhh somehow I doubt he said that voluntarily.... (Score:3, Funny)

His quote was censored.. (Score:3, Funny)

Lucky? (Score:2, Funny)

Re:I don't understand (Score:5, Funny)

Re:First Image (Score:4, Funny)

Comment removed (Score:1, Funny)

Re:I don't understand (Score:5, Funny)

Re:next year (Score:3, Funny)

of course it's lucky (Score:3, Funny)

Agreed. But the mail... (Score:3, Funny)

fishy (Score:2, Funny)

Re:next year (Score:3, Funny)

Probably (Score:2, Funny)

How convenient! (Score:2, Funny)

Haiku (Score:2, Funny)

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