Genesis Capsule Crashes; Chutes Blamed

Cyclotron_Boy writes "The Genesis probe (reported here) has crashed to the ground, near a road in the Utah desert. The stunt chopper pilots were not to blame, though. The drogue chute didn't open on re-entry. NASA TV is covering it currently. The choppers have landed near the probe, but no word yet as to the condition of the space dust." Many readers have also pointed to CNN's coverage. Update: 09/08 16:39 GMT by J : MSNBC has more coverage and a sad photo of the half-buried capsule: "The capsule broke open on impact. It was not yet clear whether the $260 million Genesis mission was ruined."

Heard on the NASA Channel

[Anonymous Coward]

KHAAAAAN! [khaaan.com]

Another priceless moment.

[d41d8cd98f00b204e980]

Probe to collect solar dust: $264 million

Defective piece of hardware --made in Taiwan, supposed to fire-open the chutes: $5.95

The face of JPL scientists: priceless!

hmmmm....

[The Salamander]

Personally, I blame the ground.

Hazmat teams on site

[unfortunateson]

Latest reports have a 10-foot-tall fungal-like growth expanding rapidly and resisting all fire and chemical methods of containment.

Not.

But it would have been interesting.

Don't Nuke It...

[the darn]

Andromeda feeds on radiation!

Whoops

[Augusto]

OK, so we had stun pilots training for 5 years, couldn't they dive in ala James Bond with their own parachutes, grab the capsule and use their own parachutes to slow down it's fall? I mean, if they get movie people, wouldn't it work like that in real life.

C'mon, NASA, get creative :-)

Andromeda Strain

[d_p]

So much for containing the specimens...

I blame the Europeans myself...

[Anonymous Coward]

They were ticked off when we laughed at Beagle 2, so they decided to get their revenge.

Re:Hazmat teams on site

[Anonymous Coward]

i blame all of this on the hurricanes that have been owning florida

PWN3D.

[Tackhead]

> "The choppers have landed near the probe, but no word yet as to the condition of the space dust."

I'm not normally a betting man, but I'd wager the space dust is is just fine. The containment vessel designed to isolate the dust, however... lookin' a little shaky.

Ok, I'm sure it wasn't just me....

[badboy_tw2002]

Sipping my first coffee of the day, I almost spit it out when I saw "Breaking News" on CNN's site, and a picture of a man staring over a flying saucer.

Ok, maybe it was. I definately need more sleep :)

Lat/Long of impact (geocaching opportunity?)

[Anonymous Coward]

40 deg. 7 min. 40 sec
113 deg. 30 min 29 sec

Re:hmmmm....

[Anonymous Coward]

I blame GRAVITY!

Re:Failure timeline

[networkBoy]

A crash landing, even at the capsule's relatively slow speed of 9 mph, could ruin some of the data collected during the mission. from CNN piece

So I suppose 100 Mph is pretty bad then eh?
-nB

That happened to me on my bicycle this weekend.

[GrizzBMX]

I lost control, and while trying to decide what to do, the ground came up and hit me.

GRIZZ

Genesis Failed

[Jack Comics]

BREAKING NEWS: The Genesis Device failed. Investigators believe that the illegal substance, protomatter, was improperly used in creation of the Device, leading to an unstable core. The investigators believe this was the ultimate cause of its failure. Dr. David Marcus, head of the Genesis Project, has gone into hiding.

..in an unrelated story...

[HaeMaker]

Helicopter pilot's blood completely coagulates in seconds...

What to expect...

[jvollmer]

Now that the Genesis probe has impacted, it will begin seeding our planet to create a life-sustaining environment on Earth.

Take that, Bush Administration!

If it's not Consolidated Lint, it's just fuzz!

From the Genesis' black box

[Anonymous Coward]

"And wow! Hey! What's this thing coming towards me very fast? Very very fast. So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding word like... ow... ound... round... ground! That's it! That's a good name - ground! I wonder if it will be friends with me?"

NASA has received logs...

[Burgundy Advocate]

There may be something wrong here.

15:55:26: And wow! Hey! What's this thing coming towards me very fast?
15:59:14: Very very fast.
16:00:42: So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding word like... ow... ound... round... ground!
16:01:03: That's it! That's a good name - ground!
16:01:52: I wonder if it will be friends with me?
16:02:31: ***ERROR NO SIGNAL***

Ob. Futurama Ref.

[hopemafia]

You win again gravity!

Re:Hazmat teams on site

[RobertB-DC]

Latest reports have a 10-foot-tall fungal-like growth expanding rapidly and resisting all fire and chemical methods of containment.

Oh, come on. Everyone knows it's going to be nearly impossible to tell what's going on, except that the rubber fittings on the helicopters will spontaneously dissolve, and the only survivors in the nearby town will be the colicky baby and the Sterno swigging wino. Right? [scifi.com]

Re:Failure timeline

[lucabrasi999]

Miles per Hour? Or Kilometers per hour? Maybe NASA should check those measurements again...

If Hollywood had planned it...

[SiliconEntity]

...the helicopter pilot would have seen the problem, matched courses with the probe, and sent his chopper into a 100 MPH dive parallelling the probe. Someone on board would have tied a rope around his waist and leaped out, freefalling, and grabbed the probe. All the time the pilot would have been shouting out the altimeter readings... 10000 feet! 9000 feet! 8000 feet!

They would have gotten the probe on board just in time for the pilot to pull out of the dive one foot above land. Then as soon as they brought the probe back to base and got it out of the copter the charge would have gone off and the chutes would blast into the air, leaving the scientist member of the team covered with soot, while everyone laughed.

Re:Genesis Failed

[orthogonal]

...Dr. David Marcus, head of the Genesis Project....

Mod parent +5 Great Big Nerd for being able to remember the fake technology of Wrath of Khan after all these years. ;)

Where's Ducoveny when you need him

[mykepredko]

Along with a fire truck full of "Head and Shoulders".

myke

wonderful NASA response

[carn1fex]

We were watching it live in the NASA cafeteria (GSFC) at lunch time on the tvs.. silence.. camera follows, follows, follows.. then the best collective "OH SHIT!" ive heard yelled in years. Then the cooks came out to watch and gave the best "Damn y'all dun fucked up huh?" look ive seen in years.

Re:Failure timeline

[RobertB-DC]

Foo: Slightly over 10 seconds later, the capsule will be exposed to about 30 G's, the greatest deceleration it will endure during Earth entry.
Bar: 30 G's??? I'd say that last millisecond was more like 300 G's. :-)

Good point. Also, you'd think that Spaceflight Now would have said "atmospheric entry" instead of "Earth entry" -- though it did indeed enter the Earth, albeit unexpectedly. Maybe they knew something we didn't. :)

Utah eh? How far was it from SCO headquarters?

[koa]

Man, I can dream can't I?

Makes me think of Office Space

[suso]

Damnit, I must have misplaced a decimal point or something. I always do that I always mess up some mundane detail.

Oh, this is not a mundane detail, Michael!!

Re:Whoops

[saider]

Actual Transcript:

Stuntman: ok, I see it - there it is.

Manager: Go! Go! Go!

[wind whipping sound heard in mic]

Stuntman: Ok, got it - Yow! This thing is HOT!

Manager: If you don't save it you don't get paid.

Stuntman: Neither do you!

[manager jumps to save probe - but forgets parachute]

See, the hollywood types were in charge but because of their lack of understanding for science and physics, they dropped the ball (pun intended).

Nick Burns, the company computer guy

[Steve_Jobs_HNIC]

NASA: "DAMN IT!! The studpid chute didn't open"

Nick Burns: "Yeah, it's the chute that's stupid, right. Yeah it's the chute's fault. ...... MOVE!!!"

Re:Apocolypse Now

[lucabrasi999]

When I saw the subject line Apocalypse Now, I was expecting some comment about the "Smell of napalm in the morning." I was a bit surprised to read something from that other apocalypse.

You can tell how religious I am. :)

Re:hmmmm....

[mrchaotica]

The ground and gravity are conspiring against us!!!

Re:Oh well

[AKAImBatman]

Maybe this wasn't really a failure, but God's way of telling Darl that he should drop his frivolous lawsuit?

I thought that involved a gigawatt laser and three metric tons of Jiffy Pop?

Re:Space.com coverage

[Rei]

It was worth it, though - the headlines were just great.

MSNBC.com: "Oops!"
FoxNews.com: "Splat!"

Re:Failure timeline

[lucabrasi999]

* 1610 GMT (12:10 p.m. EDT) Recovery forces are moving toward the capsule, which has made a very spectacular crater.

1620 GMT -- Recovery forces begin cleanup [yimg.com].

Re:Ok, I'm sure it wasn't just me....

[RobertB-DC]

Sipping my first coffee of the day, I almost spit it out when I saw "Breaking News" on CNN's site, and a picture of a man staring over a flying saucer.

This looks like a great opportunity to play a round of Fun With Captions! [space.com]

Harder, faster, better, stronger...

[Chagatai]

Well, at least we know that the "faster" portion of NASA's program seemed to work right, as the probe crashed at over 100 mph.

Look on the bright side

[John Harrison]

Soon Spock will come back to life, and in Utah no less. Maybe he will bring logic to SCO.

Re:NASA has received logs...

[daehrednud]

Oh no, not again.

awwwww CHUTE.

[TheLittleJetson]

eom

NASA vs. ESA, Quake II-style...

[HEMI426]

Beagle cratered.
Beagle2 cratered.
Spirit captured the flag!
Opportunity captured the flag!
Genesis cratered.

I think NASA is still in the lead. :)

Ob: Douglas Adams Reference

[goldmeer]

Heard From The Capsule During Freefall:
"Oh no, not again"

Re:Failure timeline

[MadMorf]

Well, somebody's got to say it...

Welcome, to our new Alien Masters!

Re:Failure timeline

[Mulletproof]

Hey now, engineers always publish their specs with some padding in mind... It can actually take double that.

Re:Failure timeline

[LiquidCoooled]

I wonder if this is what the martians saw when Beagle arrived?

Cheap Shot?

[switcha]

Diebold?

Re:Space.com coverage

[hazem]

I thought that was coverage of Clinton's operation!

Re:hmmmm....

[Archangel Michael]

For those on the left "It is Bush's fault"

For those on the right "It was caused by Kerry in Vietnam"

For those in the center "It was Fox News' fault"

For those near Roswell "It was the aliens fault"

For the environmental wackos "It will cause global warming"

For the NOW gang, "It is a sad day for womens reproductive rights"

For Scott Peterson trial, "This proves Scott did not kill Lacy" ...... I could go one. But should I?

Re:hmmmm....

[Craig Davison]

I blame Phil Collins. Trespass was their only really good album, although I did enjoy Nursery Cryme.

Re:Space.com coverage

[Anonymous Writer]

I thought that was coverage of Clinton's operation!

I thought that was from Kenn Starr's report on Clinton's affair with Monica Lewinsky :P

Cover Up!

[Anonymous Coward]

From the pictures of the crash, it looks like a crashed ufo.
I bet this whole genesis mission is just an elaborate cover up!

Re:Space.com coverage

[fenix down]

I thought that was coverage of George Bush's presidency.

Re:Ob: Douglas Adams Reference

[linuxtelephony]

And lest we forget, "I wonder if it will be friends with me?"

really sad day

[CrudPuppy]

I personally worked side by side with some of the key researchers on this project, including the PI. I cannot imagine how they must feel seeing 7 years of their life go down the drain when this thing slammed into the ground. =(

A lot of people will wanna play the blame game, but in the end the scientists just really wanted their data. really sad.

Re:Failure timeline

[edsarkiss]

doh!

Re:Failure timeline

[psetzer]

When the recovery chutes won't deploy, the only creative thing that a human can do is flap their arms really quickly.

From "Young Zaphod plays it safe"

[infolib]

"It's breaking up, is that it?" he shouted. "It's got a hold full of epsilonic radiating aorist rods or something that'll fry this whole space sector for zillions of years back and it's breaking up. Is that the story? Is that what we're going down to find? Am I going to come out of that wreck with even more heads?"
"It cannot possibly be a wreck, Mr. Beeblebrox," insisted the official. "the ship is guaranteed to be perfectly safe. It cannot possibly break up."
"Then why are you so keen to go and look at it?"
"We like to look at things that are perfectly safe."

Re:Genesis Failed

[Jason One]

Both of you need to be modded down for failing to recognize that the parent's post refers to events in The Search for Spock, not The Wrath of Khan. I believe I've out-nerded you.

Re:hmmmm....

[NanoGator]

"Personally, I blame the ground."

I got in trouble in high school over a comment like that. Channel 1 ran a pop quiz "What is the most common cause of plane crashes?" I blurted out "Gravity!"

Evidently, that's a 'see the principal' offense.

Re:According to Nasa TV...

[mreed911]

When I worked as a paramedic in the Houston area, we had an injury type code in our patient report computers of "spacecraft-related injury."

NOW I know why...

Wilmaaaaaaaa

[chromeangel23]

The crash has diminished these hopes as fears of terrestrial contamination bring doubts to the integrity of the solar samples. Some scientists remain hopeful. One such person who has asked to remain anonymous claims to have had observed the capsule and its contents at the scene of the crash noted, "Our preliminary findings are very exciting. We have observed from the solar sample that the composition of the sun is identical as the West Desert right here in Utah. "Its really amazing". He went on to continue "that dinosaurs once lived on the Sun". Courtesy http://jamitch.merseine.nu/archives/2004/09/08/gen esis-probe-crashed/

Sad News...

[Anonymous Coward]

Genesis Crashes - Phil Collins Blamed.

Re:Update:

[out_of_ideas]

I have some, wanna buy it ?
Yes, the crumbs are from alien bread.

Re:Failure timeline

[LiquidCoooled]

Why not just leave it switched off until your actually in space, or until such a time that they are needed? Spacecraft can be controlled for all other kinds of actions, why not this one?

Dave: "This is Mission control, we are go for parachute enable process, on my mark"

ship: "beep"

Dave: "This is Mission control, enable automated parachute deployment."

ship: "I'm sorry dave, I can't do that!"

Dave: "Why not?"

ship: "Because I'm buried in SCO's backyard, you forgot to adjust your clock for daylight savings time!!!"