1436167
story
roman_mir writes
"Celestis is the name of a company that is offering space burials for some $11K USD. Isn't this nice, like there is not enough garbage in space already... So, how many of you want to be buried in space? I want to burn in the Sun (or at least the egomaniacal part of me.)"
Total Recall (Score:1, Funny)
-Aaron Mitti
Special 'Delivery' Instructions (Score:5, Funny)
PS: Please aim at the section of space that in the 23rd century will be off limits to all spacefarers, in which resides the Genesis planet. Please make sure to also provide good embalming and a capsule capable of shielding body from cosmic rays.
Take down a space station (Score:5, Funny)
Re: story (Score:5, Funny)
I know *exactly* how you feel.
I want you to burn in the Sun, too.
burn in hell (Score:5, Funny)
According to my ex-wife I'm gonna burn in hell when I die.
The perfect gift (Score:5, Funny)
Space Burial? (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Broadcasting dead... (Score:5, Funny)
You want to burn in the Sun? (Score:5, Funny)
I bet not many people will want to... (Score:5, Funny)
Awesome (Score:5, Funny)
This is cool... (Score:2, Funny)
Bad idea (Score:5, Funny)
horrid website (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Broadcasting dead... (Score:5, Funny)
A) I'm coming home momma!
B) Please rectally probe the following people who bullied me in school...
C) Please view the accompanying transmitted picture
Keeping up with the Glens' (Score:2, Funny)
These guys will PAY for your space burial! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:You want to burn in the Sun? (Score:5, Funny)
Exactly. Once the sun goes red-giant, its radius will be far larger than the orbital distance of this little planet. So everyone's bones will eventually wind up toast.
Worried about global warming? Now that's global warming.
Re:Only so much carbon... (Score:5, Funny)
The amount of mass falling onto the earth from space is measured in the hundreds of tons per day.
What sorts of stuff are we launching and what sorts of stuff is falling onto the Earth? Maybe we're trading titanium for sand. Not that I think we have to worry - just a thought.
Still, maybe launching yourself into space could prevent you from being brought back to life someday. Then again, maybe you'd be brought back to life to fight some losing battle against aliens...
Re:burn in hell (Score:5, Funny)
Re:burn in hell (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Broadcasting dead... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Broadcasting dead... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Only so much carbon... (Score:5, Funny)
Say a group of zombies, or ninjas, or a killer virus that turned people into zombie ninjas, caused a good 5 billion people to die. Sure, these guys would have a booming business, but at 70Kg for each corpse, that's 350,000,000,000Kg (350 billion), which would require a millennium to replaces with space dust.
And besides, if you're ejecting all those kadavas into space, you're just asking the aforementioned virus to evolve, giving rise to a hideous race of mutant space zombie-ninjas.
Zombies need to eat too.
Save your ashes for a better use (Score:1, Funny)
Enterprise has buried Trek too (Score:1, Funny)
Do we have to wait? (Score:1, Funny)
Life on other planets?... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Take down a space station (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Broadcasting dead... (Score:3, Funny)
And for even more kicks, you'll be happy to know this message came to you via a satellite in geostationary orbit.
Yes, the 600ms ping time does suck, but at least I can annoy people on IRC by saying, "GREETINGS FROM OUTER SPACE"!
Re:I bet not many people will want to... (Score:4, Funny)
Visible from Earth (Score:3, Funny)
Yes!
Re:Only so much carbon... (Score:4, Funny)
Maybe so, but can they all stand on Zanzibar?
Hey, why not be immortalized before your time? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Take down a space station (Score:3, Funny)
It's a lot cheaper than your plan, and I still get the added bonus of the fear-striking thing.
Re:Take down a space station (Score:3, Funny)
However, the radioactive eggs that I probably laid at the time could end up hatching and once again striking the fear into the hearts of the living.
I got it all worked out. I'm looking forward to my afterlife.
i have a space venture right here (Score:2, Funny)
wait a few years (Score:5, Funny)
You can do that for free, just wait about 5 billion years.
Re:Only so much carbon... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Only so much carbon... (Score:4, Funny)
Hey, how's life down there in Flatland? *sticks fingers through wrmrxxx's plane to mess with him*
In my universe, people are three dimensional; it's like having another degree of freedom!
Re:Broadcasting dead... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Broadcasting dead... (Score:4, Funny)
I wish I hadn't used up all my mod points, that was +1 funny... anyway, who do I talk to about donating my body to science? Seriously, my wife wants to be buried with her family, and I figure science could use my body -- how better to study the effects of alcohol on the human body than to examine my dead body? :-)
Obligatory Futurama quote: (Score:2, Funny)
"The closest to heaven they'll get..."
What a dumbass! (Score:1, Funny)
Yeah, and there's so little space out there we're in danger of filling it all up.
Gosh, we wouldn't want to pollute the hard radiation filled expanse of dust, gas and Sun spew now, would we?
Part? (Score:2, Funny)
Oh i guarantee you will burn in your wholesome completeness sir. Not just that Egomaniacal part. In fact, you won't even get there you'll burn much much sooner.
$50K gets you cryonics & possible future revi (Score:3, Funny)
And if revived in the distant future, you can ride in a spaceship and look out the window at all those 100K space caskets roaming around space.
Myself, I prefer a chance at life to a certain death....
Worrying about "space garbage"? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Just Drop Into the Sun from Sail Ship (Score:3, Funny)
Or just drop the whole thing in, sails and all, and call it a modern day Viking funeral ;)
Re:Special 'Delivery' Instructions (Score:1, Funny)
I have. Then we got married so I don't have to talk to her anymore. I'm in the basement playing computer games at 9am on this lovely President's Day holiday.
Re:Space Pollution (Score:3, Funny)
Oh my God, if we are not careful we could fill all of space with our trash!!! I better hurry and get a bumper sticker for my gas guzzling SUV to express my outrage!
Ashes to Ashes... (Score:2, Funny)