Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid

eglamkowski writes "Researchers Discover Gene That Controls Ability To Learn Fear. The poor, misguided scientists say this will enable them to treat people who suffer from anxiety, panic disorders or depression(??). Of course, it also means an evil, despotic country that is cloning humans for its army can make its soldiers completely fearless, eliminating one source of possible defeat on the battlefield (breaking of morale). (Why does there seem to be no cynical scientists? ;-)"

Cynical Scientists

[Xner]

Being cynical is not a good way to get a grant.

Once the money's in the bag though, anything can happen!

Hold on there!

[Tuxinatorium]

There are perfectly good things that can be done with all this genetic enhancement to eliminate fear. Like creating a CLONE ARMY for myself so I can TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!

In time, you shall call me master. MUAHAHAHA!!

Cynical scientists

[dirtmerchant]

Why does there seem to be no cynical scientists?

All the cynics are too busy editing Slashdot.

Re:Hold on there!

[eingram]

Which one of you should we call master? ;P

Liquid Courage?

[docbrown42]

Of course, it also means an evil, despotic country that is cloning humans for its army can make its soldiers completely fearless, eliminating one source of possible defeat on the battlefield (breaking of morale).

This just in: Scientists in an evil, despotic country have started a crash program to develop a way to "turn off" the gene that causes fear in their existing soldiers, and make them fearless in battle.

The code-name for this program is Alcohol.

"Fearless" army ain't afraid of Mr. Evil Despot...

[0x69]

Fear is a very big part of how evil despots maintain their grip on power. A fearless army wouldn't be afraid of their evil dictator leader or his secret police.

Maybe we should "accidentally" leak the secrets to our favorite evil despots...

We have nothing to fear

[Anonymous Coward]

But the gene that controls learning to fear itself.

On the bright side...

[Dannon]

This is decent timing for the Daredevil movie, isn't it? Could actually have a 'man with no fear'....

Silly scientists

[Hubert_Shrump]

Look, the studies have been done, and everyone knows that this is infeasable. As the fear level drops, the urge to eat brains increases at an alarming rate.

As Napoleon said, "An army marches on its stomach", and there is just not enough brains in the world to have a whole zombie army.

Eliminate Suffering

[Mignon]

According to Yoda, speaking to Anakin: "Fear is the path to the Dark Side! Fear leads to anger..... anger leads to hate........ hate leads to suffering! I sense much fear in you."

So, if Yoda had known about this, he could have treated Anakin and prevented him from becoming Darth Vader.

We are surrounded by fearless people

[Caractacus Potts]

They are called violent criminals.

There are exceptions of course. A soccer mom driving in the mountains at night in the rain while feeding french fries to their kid in the back seat while talking on the cell phone probably counts too. Yes, that is a true story. I was scared sh1tless while it was happening, so I definitely have the fear gene.

Re:Fear of superhuman soldiers?

[BathTub]

I don't see any comments by michael on this article.

Re:rtfa eglamkowski

[zardor]

Hey, I've got forearms, and two kidneys!

Go on, mod me down, I'm not afraid!

Re:Fearless Soldiers?

[phorm]

b1: Look what's that in his hand
b2: Let's rush him, he can't take all of at once right
b1: What's that bigass gun he's holding?
b2: Says BFG on it. No idea what that means. Let's go
b1: Alright, I'm in.

Yeah...not only that, but fearless soldiers would also not fear the government, or many other things. Somehow I think that removing this gene would also make them a bit hard to handle.