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Want to Experience Zero G? Stay in Bed

Posted by CmdrTaco on Wed Mar 29, 2006 11:24 AM
from the done-and-done dept.
Space Science
mrogers writes "New Scientist Space is reporting that the health effects of microgravity can be reproduced by staying in bed. Inclining the bed at an angle of 6 degrees with the head at the lower end produces bone and muscle loss, decreases in cardiovascular activity, and reduced capacity to exercise similar to those produced by prolonged spaceflight. (Valeri Polyakov was not available for comment at the time of going to press.)"
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Want to Experience Zero G? Stay in Bed 25 Comments More /

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  • Proper Analogy? (Score:5, Funny)

    by JDSalinger (911918) * on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:25AM (#15017785)
    Is this like analogizing dreaming to taking hallucinogens?
    If so, this is like telling Slashdotters "Want to Experience Sex? Stay in Bed and touch yourself."
    Obviously, an insufficient "Experience". I suspect the same of the Stay in Bed "Experience". Someone try this and get back to us.
    -C
      • The similarity of the two groups' results confirms the decades-long practice of using inclined bedrest as a proxy for spaceflight.

        Actually, NASA has been doing "bed-rest studies" on the effectiveness of various exercise regimes for some time now: I remember an ad hanging in the cafeteria when I worked at NASA Ames ~ 2001, it said something like "help advance space science without leaving the comfort of a bed." I asked a friend who worked in life support about it, and she tactfully said "it's very uncomfor

  • or, the results of... (Score:5, Insightful)

    by yagu (721525) * <yayagu AT gmail DOT com> on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:25AM (#15017786) Journal

    Not to nitpick here, but isn't experiencing Zero Gs quite a different beast than experiencing the effects of Zero Gs (based on the article's somewhat misleading title)?

    I'm pretty sure one of the effects of experiencing true Zero Gs does not include bed sores!

    And, is anyone else sick of the un-"stoppable" macromedia flash ads that suck up cpu and battery life? I see one now on /. from Neumont University... and it's using 50% of my 1.6GHz cpu, and I can't turn it off.... Fuck Neumont! Fuck Flash ads!

  • Another option (Score:3, Funny)

    by Mattygfunk1 (596840) * on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:26AM (#15017792) Homepage
    Want to Experience Zero G? Stay in Bed

    Yeah maybe, but I suspect most of us would be far better served by experiencing improved health at our local sports club, and the social benefits are much better too.

  • Hmmm sounds like an excuse to me (Score:5, Funny)

    by liliafan (454080) * on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:27AM (#15017804) Homepage
    Sounds to me like some scientist didn't feel like going into work one day and called in with "Hi boss I can't come in today I am researching the effects of staying in bed and comparing them to the effects of zero gravity", finally someone actually came up with a way to get a grant to just stay in bed......lucky bastard.

    *disclaimer: I read the article this is a joke.

  • Amazing! (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:28AM (#15017817)
    I tried this out a while ago. The results were truly amazing. I found that I was no longer required to obey the laws of gravity. I simply floated wherever I wanted to go.

  • The obvious question (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Oooskar (806935) on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:30AM (#15017831)
    Will you experience an increase in bone and muscle mass if you sleep with your head at the higher end?
    • Probably explains why the Minbari in Babylon 5 were so much stronger, their beds were slanted with their head higher than their feet. Their explanation was that only the dead lie flat, but perhaps they were simply misleading the humans?

      • Probably explains why the Minbari in Babylon 5 were so much stronger, their beds were slanted with their head higher than their feet. Their explanation was that only the dead lie flat, but perhaps they were simply misleading the humans?

        Really? I thought it was just because JMS wasn't good at the details when writing science fiction and that he picked a bad way to make the Minbari different and used a rather pathetic excuse to justify it...

        And I actually like Babylon 5...

  • Define 'available'. (Score:5, Funny)

    by Black Parrot (19622) on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:31AM (#15017838)
    > Valeri Polyakov was not available for comment at the time of going to press.

    Actually he was available, but too weak to type a reply to the questions...
  • This is MY kind of science!

  • Want to Experience Zero G? Stay in Bed and... (Score:3, Funny)

    by digitaldc (879047) * on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:42AM (#15017932)
    Dream on, buddy!

  • Even better idea! (Score:5, Funny)

    by physicsphairy (720718) on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:43AM (#15017938) Homepage
    Swallow a timed explosive charge, and then with the proper inclination of sleep you can experience all the effects of being in a zero-G and zero-pressure spacelike environment!

    Who's got my grant money?

  • Inclining the bed at an angle of 6 degrees with the head at the lower end produces bone and muscle loss, decreases in cardiovascular activity, and reduced capacity to exercise similar to those produced by prolonged spaceflight.

    Similar results can be obtained by sitting in front of your computer and playing World of Warcraft every day for 16 hours. Remember, your results may vary.

  • Or alternately... (Score:4, Funny)

    by GillBates0 (664202) on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:48AM (#15017966) Homepage Journal
    produces bone and muscle loss, decreases in cardiovascular activity, and reduced capacity to exercise similar to those produced by prolonged spaceflight

    ...we could continue our couch potato lifestyles and daily beer drinking rituals to achieve the same effect.

    "No, honey, I'm not being lazy, I'm just trying to experience the effects of microgravity".

  • Groan. (Score:5, Funny)

    by Rob T Firefly (844560) on Wednesday March 29 2006, @11:48AM (#15017967) Homepage Journal
    Want to Experience Zero G? Stay in Bed

    I just want to stay in bed, isn't that enough? Keep your science out of my laziness.

  • Space trip for masochists? (Score:3, Informative)

    by Opportunist (166417) on Wednesday March 29 2006, @12:12PM (#15018184)
    Why the hell would someone want to have the unwanted side effects of microgravity without the cool features? It's like selling drugs that get you addicted, give you withdrawal but no high.

    But I guess the real meaning of the info is in its reversed reading. We know what microgravity does to long time astronauts. So don't stay in bed for too long periods unless you want to suffer the same way they do when they return to 1.0g areas.

  • I just tried this... (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday March 29 2006, @12:22PM (#15018284)
    I tilted my bed 6 degrees, but now I keep rolling out. I experience zero-g for a few microseconds before hitting the floor.

    Maybe I need to tilt it the other direction. At least that way my wife will cushion the fall.

  • I did this (Score:3, Interesting)

    by verloren (523497) on Wednesday March 29 2006, @12:40PM (#15018466)
    Not voluntarily though - as a child I was diagnosed with Perthes disease [wikipedia.org] and hospitalized for a year in an inclined bed - I think the incline was to help the effects of the traction that was also applied. This was done for a year, the last few weeks of which were learning to walk again. The amount of muscle wastage was quite amazing; I was unable to stand at first, partly because I wasn't used to balancing, but mainly because I just couldn't exert that much force. I was lucky though - I went in again for a month a few years later, and one lad had been in for almost 2 years with no end in sight. A shame that recent thinking suggests it doesn't actually help. I guess this doesn't quite qualify me as an astronaut though?

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